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I had chosen to not tell my co workers about my surgery, however, I did tell my immediate supervisors. I had surgery in mid-September and have gotten the feeling now that people know about it. Yesterday, four people came up to me at work and asked how I lost so much weight. Now, I have lost about 20 pounds since surgery so it's possible that they were genuinely asking. However, some things that were said made me feel that they were asking to see if I would tell the truth. One person said "how come you didn't say anything? I was waiting for you to tell me."
If it's discovered that one of my supervisors disclosed to the rest of the staff about my surgery, what are my options? I don't believe that it is right for people to be discussing my medical issues. I already have felt alienated and an outsider at my job for other reasons (I'm new, I'm in a different office a few times a week), but now I feel even worse. Plus, if people do know the truth, I feel like a complete fool lying to them. Which technically isn't lying- I've said I'm eating less of a portion and exercising.
Help! I'm sure others have been in this situation before...

Hello
I'm scheduled for gastric bypass on September 14. I know I've made the right decision and am so excited for this. In fact, I've never been more excited than anything.
My friends, family, and boyfriend have been amazingly supportive, which I am grateful for. However, I am not interested in having the discussion about surgery with people at work. I struggle with severe anxiety and don't want to be triggered by what other people may think. My anxiety, while I am a functional human being, severely impacts me.
My question is, how can I handle questions about taking time off of work. My supervisors do already know and I've gotten tremendous support from them. My concern is with gossip with coworkers, which is really just unwelcome and not needed by me.

Hello
I'm scheduled for gastric bypass on September 14. I know I've made the right decision and am so excited for this. In fact, I've never been more excited than anything.
My friends, family, and boyfriend have been amazingly supportive, which I am grateful for. However, I am not interested in having the discussion about surgery with people at work. I struggle with severe anxiety and don't want to be triggered by what other people may think. My anxiety, while I am a functional human being, severely impacts me.
My question is, how can I handle questions about taking time off of work. My supervisors do already know and I've gotten tremendous support from them. My concern is with gossip with coworkers, which is really just unwelcome and not needed by me.

Thank you! So glad to have this community as a support!

I love the idea of just saying to people that I'm eating more Protein and less carbs, and working out more. Which will be 100% the truth. They can make their own conclusions from that information but for me, that's the story I will stick with.

I just hope that my supervisors haven't already said anything, which I know would be a huge violation. I guess I could've told them that I just need to have surgery, and not specify what kind, however, it's too late for that because I already told them. I guess we will wait and see.

Part of what I'm hoping from getting my surgery is getting my confidence up and trying to really work on not caring what people think. I struggle with this now. I guess for my whole life I've tried to keep quiet and not speak up, because people (in middle school) would often respond to me with an insult about my weight if I ever said anything. I guess these things have really stuck with me , and now as an adult, I'd really like to change that.

Thanks again for all the wonderful feedback, and good luck to you all on your journeys! :-)

Hello
I'm scheduled for gastric bypass on September 14. I know I've made the right decision and am so excited for this. In fact, I've never been more excited than anything.
My friends, family, and boyfriend have been amazingly supportive, which I am grateful for. However, I am not interested in having the discussion about surgery with people at work. I struggle with severe anxiety and don't want to be triggered by what other people may think. My anxiety, while I am a functional human being, severely impacts me.
My question is, how can I handle questions about taking time off of work. My supervisors do already know and I've gotten tremendous support from them. My concern is with gossip with coworkers, which is really just unwelcome and not needed by me.

My date is sept.7 and it feels already like I'm grieving the loss of food

Sent from my SM-G955U using BariatricPal mobile app

Yes, I too have been worried about not being able to eat certain yummy things lately. My sister is three years post and she said her cravings changed. She also reminded me that at some point you will be able to add stuff back and you will know when you've had "enough" instead of over-eating and indulging.

Getting counseling will be of great benefit to you after surgery. the surgery fixes the body but not the mind. I am in counseling also, I find it really helps me stay grounded. Good Luck

As my surgery date is getting closer (3 weeks), I've found myself having all sorts of emotions, which is obviously common.
Mostly, lately, it's been about not having food as my comfort anymore. I've been heavy all my life and as a quiet and shy person, I've always turned to food for comfort. It made me happy, it relaxed me, it was always there for me. It turned into my worst enemy as I developed bulimia at the age of 15. I went through therapists and nutritionists and finally tackled my eating disorder about 3 years ago but in trying to battle it all those years, I gained all the weight I had lost back and then some. Since I've been free of my eating disorder, it's been impossible to lose any weight, which is why I'm getting the surgery.
I know I've made the right decision, but has anyone else struggled with this sadness of not being able to be comforted by food anymore?
P.S. And YES my surgeon and team are fully aware of my history.
Does anyone have any suggestions as how to cope with this? I do plan on pursuing regular mental health counseling.

I'm scheduled for September 14. Liver reduction diet starts August 31. :-)

You. Are. My. Hero. LOL!! THIS is HILARIOUS and FREAKING good! LOL

LOL oh honey, I may seem put together but, my brain is a hot mess. Really not with a whole lot other than the weight subject. lol. So maybe that is the confidence you're seeing!

I'm going to play devil's advocate here just to throw out some possibilities that MAY happen. I'm most likely older than you, and, for me, I have never worked in a place that I could trust, including my supervisors, to keep something quiet.
Knowing me, I would always be wondering if people already knew, and then I would worry that I sounded like I was lying. But that's me. I worry too much about what people are thinking about me.
My guess is that when you are losing weight so rapidly, people are going to suspect that you had WLS anyway. They will already be gossiping about it.
It would be great if, in your mind, you were ready for all of that. Know that gossip may still happen, but stick with your answer to everyone.
I will be following you and your journey. All the best to you! You're going to do great and look wonderful!!

I don't think you were ness playing the devil's advocate! I think you're just being very realistic!
I agree with them still talking anyway however, I still feel like - its on them at that point. Thats their brains and thats something they are gonna have to work through. I have enough problems of my own trying to get through life. Don't want/need to take theirs on either! lol.

I agree with everything you said. Amen! I wish I could be more like you. I've had to work my entire life on not worrying what people think about me. It's such a waste of emotional energy. 😀

Assuming you are in the US, no one needs to know why you are out. Your immediate supervisors only need to know how long you will be out. Therefore, you need to come up with a stock answer. " I'm having some health issues and need to take some time off. Thank you for your concern, but I do not wish to discuss it outside my family. " If they push, ask if they had sex the night before. When they freak, you can explain that you view your personal health information the same way they view their sex life - as a private matter which no one is entitled to ask about.
Trust me. It works. Particularly with the do-gooder types who say they just want to offer help. Generally shuts them down. Best of luck.

Thank you for the replies!! You have both given me great advice and suggestions. I am going to continue to keep it quiet for now with people I'm not close with (coworkers). And maybe someday, I can open up about it, but for now and the near future, I'll be working on me and my goals :-)

Love the suggestion about always following up a comment made with a question- that will work great!

Hello
I'm scheduled for gastric bypass on September 14. I know I've made the right decision and am so excited for this. In fact, I've never been more excited than anything.
My friends, family, and boyfriend have been amazingly supportive, which I am grateful for. However, I am not interested in having the discussion about surgery with people at work. I struggle with severe anxiety and don't want to be triggered by what other people may think. My anxiety, while I am a functional human being, severely impacts me.
My question is, how can I handle questions about taking time off of work. My supervisors do already know and I've gotten tremendous support from them. My concern is with gossip with coworkers, which is really just unwelcome and not needed by me.

Thank you for the replies!! You have both given me great advice and suggestions. I am going to continue to keep it quiet for now with people I'm not close with (coworkers). And maybe someday, I can open up about it, but for now and the near future, I'll be working on me and my goals :-)

Love the suggestion about always following up a comment made with a question- that will work great!