Kat410

My biggest goal is to have a healthy, vital body. I would like to ride horses, bike, hike up a mountain and I think it would be cool to be able to do some of the more pretzely yoga poses.

Mostly I would like to disappear any sense of shame I have about my body.

98 Pounds down!
65% of excess body weight gone
Lifting weights, HIT and yoga
More energy, vitality and aliveness!

As a believer in skin care here’s what I do.

For all over body moisturizer I se Shea butter. In the shower I clean body with almond oil and s good scrub with a natural loofah. I use dr Bonner’s soap on private parts, under arms and face.

I don’t use fancy moisturizers but use them generously.

I don’t shower every day but do wash certain parts every day with a washcloth. I think we over shower in America. You can handle hygiene without subjecting your entire body to it.

For under eye concealer I like Nars.

This makes me sorta mad and it’s not even happening to me. I think it’s just embedded in our culture that the female body is there to be managed, controlled, commented on and otherwise handled.

The other day One led the commentators came back to me and asked if it was inappropriate that he said something (as I was walking past him in a busy office he literally said “How much weight have you lost???” No greeting - just that.)

I told him that I recommend that he never comment on someone’s body ever. And if he has a relationship with that person he should ask for permission to ask about it. People lose and gain weight for all sorts of reasons and we can never assume that we know what people are dealing with.

When my aunt was initially diagnosed with pancreatic cancer people started praising her for her weight loss at first - she lived for a year.

We tend to lose fat where we actually have fat and we don’t lose it evenly. If your face wasn’t “fat” when you were heavy you will probably lose proportionately elsewhere.

That being said, everything will change. Will it be ok if you have a skinny face but reduce health issues, get more vitality and stamina and extend your life?

Loose skin, thinning hair and perhaps a skinny face are a badge of honor for the hard work.

98 Pounds down!
65% of excess body weight gone
Lifting weights, HIT and yoga
More energy, vitality and aliveness!

We tend to lose fat where we actually have fat and we don’t lose it evenly. If your face wasn’t “fat” when you were heavy you will probably lose proportionately elsewhere.

That being said, everything will change. Will it be ok if you have a skinny face but reduce health issues, get more vitality and stamina and extend your life?

Loose skin, thinning hair and perhaps a skinny face are a badge of honor for the hard work.

We tend to lose fat where we actually have fat and we don’t lose it evenly. If your face wasn’t “fat” when you were heavy you will probably lose proportionately elsewhere.

That being said, everything will change. Will it be ok if you have a skinny face but reduce health issues, get more vitality and stamina and extend your life?

Loose skin, thinning hair and perhaps a skinny face are a badge of honor for the hard work.

We tend to lose fat where we actually have fat and we don’t lose it evenly. If your face wasn’t “fat” when you were heavy you will probably lose proportionately elsewhere.

That being said, everything will change. Will it be ok if you have a skinny face but reduce health issues, get more vitality and stamina and extend your life?

Loose skin, thinning hair and perhaps a skinny face are a badge of honor for the hard work.

We tend to lose fat where we actually have fat and we don’t lose it evenly. If your face wasn’t “fat” when you were heavy you will probably lose proportionately elsewhere.

That being said, everything will change. Will it be ok if you have a skinny face but reduce health issues, get more vitality and stamina and extend your life?

Loose skin, thinning hair and perhaps a skinny face are a badge of honor for the hard work.

Latest before and after pic! I’m officially down 109lbs from my highest weight. 6 months since surgery. I’m feeling better everyday! went to Disney and took in a shirt I wore here in December. I got the chance to recreate the pic and I feel so damn good seeing the transformation!
Before: Size 24 and 3X
Current: Size 14 and L

Thank you so much...Im really proud of how far I have come in such a short time..I almost want to walk around in my boxers..lol

Do what the ancients used to do ... it works for me.
Massage your skin with kitchen grade EVOO. Pat dry with a paper towel.
Rub with grainy salt ... table salt will do.
Reapply EVOO. Massage skin. Wipe off with a paper towel.
Within 30-45 minutes, have a warm shower.

All. Thank you so much for relating, sharing your thoughts and the encouragement and support. At the end of the day my biggest challenge is with what's in my head and appreciating what I look like now. I want to read through and reply, however will do the easy thing first. Here's my now, meow =) .
5'7" 194 - Size 14/16

No, horror story here ... in fact, it's very much a polar opposite.
I have been in the 135kg to 176kg range the last ten years. (i.e. about 297 to 388 pounds)
My wife has been in the 91kg to 126kg range in the same period. (i.e. about 201 to 278 pounds)
After my son died in March this year (industrial accident on a construction site), I crept up to 176kg again (by July) and she was about 125kg (by late March).
She'd already arranged a gastric balloon to try to help lose weight. After her initial success of losing about 16kg in 17 weeks, I decided to ask my doctor to refer me for a gastric sleeve. (I felt I needed to be lighter and fitter to honour my son's memory and to be around to assist with the raising of the toddler and the baby he left behind.)
She's now at 90kg as of November 1 and has just had a brand new 2nd gastric ballon inserted. I am already in the lower half of the 150s and today the first time in eight months that my BMI has been under 50.
We're good friends first. We married December 2007 ... as we'd become separated (then divorced) from our FIRST spouses. In high school (1972-1973) my wife was the best friend of the sister my then girlfriend. She told me in 2007 when we reunited for a few social events that she had always liked me at school and wished I'd paid more attention to her when she was shy and timid.
After her 50th birthday party (her 99kg, me 128kg) I asked if we should move in together. She took it as a marriage proposal. We just celebrated her 60th and my 61st birthdays.
We are sort of "rocks" for one another and we are both sorting out our health and fitness separately, IN DIFFERENT WAYS, but together in spirit.
So, in answer, no change in the love and respect departments ... but we are becoming better people for ourselves first and one another and for all our combined 11 grandchildren. Our two exes are now very respectful people and we are all involved together in supporting one another and the children and grandchildren.
Life's too short to be upsetting others and causing rifts, eh?

Is it just me - or does anyone get annoyed by the NEVER ENDING STREAM OF COMMENTS about your body???
I work in an environment where I interact with hundreds of people every day, and while the comments are "nice", I am unbelievably sick of people thinking they have the right to comment on my body, how I look, their assumptions about how hard it's been, what this means, how they think I feel, what they think this means to me, what they think I have had to deal with, their opinions about it, etc.
I mean.... it is NON STOP. People literally say things like "You must feel so much better!" (I didn't feel bad before). "This must have been so difficult!" (no, it really wasn't because I was mentally read). "You look so much younger!" (I didn't realize I looked old before). "How much weight have you lost?" (I have lost none of your business pounds).
Am I nuts to get so annoyed about this?

Thanks for the mansplaining here.

I am clear it is well intentioned. Peoples actions are what communicates, not their intentions.

It could just be different for us girls, given our bodies are regulated, legislated and seemingly up for grabs in even casual social interactions.

10 months post op progress picture:
HW- 301 (July 2016)
SW- 271 (12/30/16)
CW- 188 as of today. I'm bouncing between 185 and 188
5'10"

When I was 130 pounds heavier 16 months ago, dating was difficult. A pretty face, but if I just lost the weight. I always seemed to settle.
Now that I'm 130 pounds lighter, at 5'7" and a size 14, I work out five days a week and have been able to tighten and tone. Not perfect, but I'm built like a strong, fit roller derby chick and it's a pretty amazing feeling.
Dating at 45 in this new body, I thought would be easier, however it just seems I've gone up the ring of what men find attractive, however am not quite small enough. I've met some great guys I'm not attracted to and somehow, am attracted to guys who aren't so great.
I take pictures in the mirror, straight on, no angles, because I want to see what I look like. I've used some of these on a dating site with mixed results. One man told me I looked smaller in the picture than in person. Some, I can see, think the same thing, or I think they do and say I'm very pretty. At that point it's all about chemistry anyway.
I met a man last week who was tall, broad and charming on every level. I had shared with him that the previous week, I met a man for a drink, who proceeded to give me roses and then expected that I wanted to have sex with him. Of course I said no. I mean please. Even though this new guy knew I wouldn't, I could tell immediately by the number of drinks he wanted me to have, that he thought I would loosen up and let him come home with me. Of course, I didn't and was disappointed once again. Here I am, half the person I was, and here I am, meeting the same men...who think that because I'm not a size 4, that I'm going to be easy.
Now, I'm not saying women who are size 4 don't have this same problem. Also not saying that they don't have body issues either because I know all women have some kind of issue.
I guess I'm struggling with knowing what I really look like. I don't know if I look normal, average, curvy. I hoped it would be a little easier, an improvement dating on the other side of the scale. I'm an attractive, confident woman and won't be settling, however wonder how many people struggle with dating post surgery. Men and women.
Maybe it's just going to take someone really special .
Still hopeful, yet a little sad tonight, still feeling like the fat girl again on the inside.

Is it just me - or does anyone get annoyed by the NEVER ENDING STREAM OF COMMENTS about your body???
I work in an environment where I interact with hundreds of people every day, and while the comments are "nice", I am unbelievably sick of people thinking they have the right to comment on my body, how I look, their assumptions about how hard it's been, what this means, how they think I feel, what they think this means to me, what they think I have had to deal with, their opinions about it, etc.
I mean.... it is NON STOP. People literally say things like "You must feel so much better!" (I didn't feel bad before). "This must have been so difficult!" (no, it really wasn't because I was mentally read). "You look so much younger!" (I didn't realize I looked old before). "How much weight have you lost?" (I have lost none of your business pounds).
Am I nuts to get so annoyed about this?

Thanks for the mansplaining here.

I am clear it is well intentioned. Peoples actions are what communicates, not their intentions.

It could just be different for us girls, given our bodies are regulated, legislated and seemingly up for grabs in even casual social interactions.

This makes me sorta mad and it’s not even happening to me. I think it’s just embedded in our culture that the female body is there to be managed, controlled, commented on and otherwise handled.

The other day One led the commentators came back to me and asked if it was inappropriate that he said something (as I was walking past him in a busy office he literally said “How much weight have you lost???” No greeting - just that.)

I told him that I recommend that he never comment on someone’s body ever. And if he has a relationship with that person he should ask for permission to ask about it. People lose and gain weight for all sorts of reasons and we can never assume that we know what people are dealing with.

When my aunt was initially diagnosed with pancreatic cancer people started praising her for her weight loss at first - she lived for a year.

Is it just me - or does anyone get annoyed by the NEVER ENDING STREAM OF COMMENTS about your body???
I work in an environment where I interact with hundreds of people every day, and while the comments are "nice", I am unbelievably sick of people thinking they have the right to comment on my body, how I look, their assumptions about how hard it's been, what this means, how they think I feel, what they think this means to me, what they think I have had to deal with, their opinions about it, etc.
I mean.... it is NON STOP. People literally say things like "You must feel so much better!" (I didn't feel bad before). "This must have been so difficult!" (no, it really wasn't because I was mentally read). "You look so much younger!" (I didn't realize I looked old before). "How much weight have you lost?" (I have lost none of your business pounds).
Am I nuts to get so annoyed about this?

Is it just me - or does anyone get annoyed by the NEVER ENDING STREAM OF COMMENTS about your body???
I work in an environment where I interact with hundreds of people every day, and while the comments are "nice", I am unbelievably sick of people thinking they have the right to comment on my body, how I look, their assumptions about how hard it's been, what this means, how they think I feel, what they think this means to me, what they think I have had to deal with, their opinions about it, etc.
I mean.... it is NON STOP. People literally say things like "You must feel so much better!" (I didn't feel bad before). "This must have been so difficult!" (no, it really wasn't because I was mentally read). "You look so much younger!" (I didn't realize I looked old before). "How much weight have you lost?" (I have lost none of your business pounds).
Am I nuts to get so annoyed about this?

My fellow gastric bypass patients!!! The 18th of October was my Surgerversary!!!
From 492lbs to 233lbs!!! Down 259lbs in 15months, yes I lost 30 lbs before surgery.
I lost 83% of my excess body weight!!!
From a size 72L suit coat to a 46L!!!
On 10/18, I ran 6.5 miles because I can - yes so so just ran a 10k...:. Never thought I would run again...
BP is 110/70 routinely
A1C is 5.0
Total Cholesterol from 185 down to 122....
Triglycerides from 76 to 41....
Thank you for all the support and to this working to find success keep the faith!!!
You can accomplish your dreams as well.