Neversaynever

I'd guess that your entire dating landscape will change. By that I mean you are going to change, your confidence will change, your tolerance for BS with change, you will find a voice you didn't know you had.
In other words, you may want to begin to ask yourself, not who will like me, but who will deserve me.
Just my .02

One year post op 228 to 154. 75lbs down.

Just had to share the good news after having a really rough first week ! Today marks a week from my surgery ! Weight date of surgery 232 , weight TODAY 210 !!!!!!!!!! I did not see that number coming when I stepped on the scale !!

Say
Would I rather drag around too tired to do housework
Too out of breath to climb stairs
Legs hurt too bad to go for much of a walk
Only go outside when the temprature's right
Too cold and and,you ache
Too hot and you sweat buckets
Not be able to fit normal-sized seating and pretty colored clothing
Have people look at you like you were a disgusting bug
Be known as that fat broad or big man when you have a perfectly lovely name your parents gave you.
Have people you haven't seen for awhile say " Oh are you still living?"
Have younger people tell you take
up too much space, waste too much of the world's resources so just die, and do,it quickly
Get up every morning knowing that you are in pain and this is As little pain you will have until you try to move
Look at yourself in the mirror and not,mind how you look. Even worse, not own. a mirror you can see all of you in.
Know that no matter how much you eat your stomach will hurt and feel unsatisfied.
Know when you get up you don't really matter to anyone and you pray for death to realease you from your dismal existence
After All this You Still want to Stay as You Are'---then More Power to You. It will take every drop of your Power to Even Exist!
If you reject any or all of the above then join me in seeking and obtaining Life Changing Surgery. You see, either I or People I cared for have had all the above, many died out of Hope, but by,all I hold dear, all I find Good and Holy, I shall not merely exist. I don't walk slowly, I run as fast as my legs, old as they are, can move toward my surgery. Better the Person I can become than the weary depressed hollow shell I had become. I will enter the Operating Theatre with a Song in My ❤, when I wake up again, and yes I shall wake, for my surgeon has a perfect record which I shall not besmirch, I will have a smile😛 from cheek to cheek upon my face, what pain I have will be mild and negatory for the final result will be having my chance at continued life, and this one will be SO MUCH BETTER!
Don't be Jello, quivering and fearful, join me , strong and resolute in my Bright Shining New Day! Joy always has and always will Trump sorrow!🌈

Dumping syndrome for me comes in the form of heart palpitations, and as of last night fainting. So last night I cheated and ate a piece of candy, 3 pieces to be exact. I came up stairs laid down to watch tv. I didnt wait 30 minutes to drink, I waited like 30 seconds. flushing all the stupid sugar (candy) into my small intestine. An hour or 2 later my heart starts racing , once this subsided I got up to use the restroom, next thing I know I'm waking up on the bathroom floor with my face bouncing off the baseboard. First time fainting for me, and a lesson well learned. Oh, let me be totally honest here I also had been enjoying an alcoholic libation. ( I was not drunk, but I'm sure this alcohol combined with candy, along with not waiting to drink all combined to make a perfect storm. So yeah, I'm pretty sure I have a broken nose, my knee, hip, elbow and face are all nicely bruised. This could have been avoided had I not drank alcohol candy and paid closer attention to the rapid heart rate earlier.

Tell them you were born with 3 testicles, only 2 descended, they have to go in and find where it went. Or you got a boil the last time you wore a Speedo and you want it fixed so you can go on a Caribbean cruise. Or tell them you're having a sex change, you're going to keep trying,until you find one b you like. That ought stun them into silence.🎭

Let me give you the opposite challenge Is It Worth it to Postpone, WhimWah around until the Day your surgeon says you're in too poor a shape to be a Good Surgery Candidate. Do you have the strength and resolution to fight an uphill battle at 72, like me? Do you want to be tilting windmills like an Bariatric Geriatric Don Quixote? Do you want to have to prove you're healthy inside, many people my age aren't, you're committed enough, hear it may take you longer to heal, be told there is a higher risk of you dying than if you were 30 or even 40, to have to impress a medical community than once refused surgery to anyone over 60, to take a chance on you, to have friends and family tell you you're silly, only self-centered, you don't care about the outcome for them? Will you fold, give up this dream, die obese and in pain? Or will you persevere against these odds , go forward and receive your surgery? My battle would have been easier then, but the Victory can and will be Mine. To be brutally honest,if I can do it against all the odds I've faced and beaten, why can't you see IT IS WORTH IT?

Buck up my little buckaroo! It's almost your 🏇rodeo and I see blue ribbons🎀 and trophies🏆 in your future🌈! No Tears No Fears🌟 Just Joy and👑 Triumph Already. 🏣Full speed🚘 Ahead Pat, it is really worth the drive!

@dreamingofasleeve
From what I read, it is normal to have some reservations and fear pre-op. In the weeks leading up to my surgery, I know I was certainly questioning myself every step of the way, even up to the surgery itself. As they were strapping me to the operating table, I was crying. And, just like Matt, I can say that I'm glad I did it now. That was not always the case.
I went through a similar experience as Matt with Lap Band, but I had my band out long ago and lived without my tool for about 8 years before realizing that I needed help. Since I got sleeved, I've gone through what I call a food "mourning" period where I think about what I've done and what the ramifications are to my relationship with food. There was a certain pleasure in eating and for me, it was linked to socialization and love. I have had to come to grips with that and change. I think I will always struggle with it, a little bit.
Today, food is fuel. Yes, I still derive a certain amount of pleasure in it, but I don't eat for pleasure. Today, I eat to live. I don't live to eat.
My advice to you is to do a little bit of soul searching. Bariatric surgery of any kind is not the end all/be all. YOU need to examine how much you are willing to adapt and change in order to reach your goals. Any weight loss surgery is a tool, a powerful one, but a tool just the same. Good luck!

I have just measured myself and using the measurements from before my surgery, I have lost 42 inches from my body, gobsmacked!

Unfortunately, 6 of those inches are from my boobs

I honestly don't want to look at the scale. I want to feel the weight coming off by how I look, feel, and my clothes getting looser. I believe I can ha

I have just measured myself and using the measurements from before my surgery, I have lost 42 inches from my body, gobsmacked!

Unfortunately, 6 of those inches are from my boobs

@Frustr8 I honestly love you!

I have only told my immediate family and my best friend. Anyone else that asks I just say I am following a very low calorie diet and it is working!
Also, regarding the scars from surgery, if anyone asks in the future, I will say it was from having my gallbladder out, which is true but I had it done 15 years ago lol.

One other thing, here in the uk you can have the surgery done for free on the Nhs if you go through many hoops and it takes about 18 months to two years. Some people take offence that you have what they would class as non essential surgery and that it means in their eyes that you are a burden on the Nhs. That's obviously false as statistics show I will be much less of a burden once I lose all that weight and won't need diabetic meds and high blood pressure meds etc in the future.

Every few days or when I am feeling thinner. I did start getting weird about the whole thing and if I hadn't lost or god forbid, gained, it really affected my day.

I decided life is too short to hang my entire days happiness on what the scales say.

Every few days or when I am feeling thinner. I did start getting weird about the whole thing and if I hadn't lost or god forbid, gained, it really affected my day.

I decided life is too short to hang my entire days happiness on what the scales say.

I am a July 2017 sleever. My goal weight was 140 lbs, and by June I was 144, which sometimes goes up to 145. So I didn’t get down to it. But I eat a nice amount in a day, I’m never hungry (except right before I eat of course), I have my little Snacks which I don’t need to feel ashamed of, as their macros and calories fit in with a healthy diet. So my weight loss counselor told me as she graduated me, that I don’t need to worry about the numbers of the scale any more.
I still feel I have too much fat and skin in the lower half of the body. I do plan on surgery to help with some of the trouble spots and skin. And I work out now, I FINALLY believe all those thin people who used to say they loved working out. Didn’t you also think they were lying? Lol. Now I am one of them. I still can’t believe it. I don’t overdo it but I like to do some kind of workout or exercise at least once a day, even if it’s just stretching for 20 mins some days.
The surgery was one of the best things I have ever done for myself. Which I did more for my kids than for me, because my blood pressure was getting so bad and I wanted them to have a mother for a long time. But it ended up giving me a new lease on life.
I did not lose 100 lbs in 6 months. It took me a whole year to lose 60 little pounds. But that is pretty much what I needed to lose. I could go down 10 lbs but maybe I will after body shaping, skin removing surgery, and maybe I won’t. My face and arms and chest are pretty small and I am not sure I want them any narrower. At my age it just makes you look old.
I thought losing so slowly would mean I wouldn’t lose my hair. I was wrong. I lost about 75% of it by last November and by January I was getting Vitamin and mineral IVs and extensions in my meager hair (which looked very post chemo). Still have the extensions and also a ton of 2-3 inch new hair growing back in. Whew.
My advice to anyone starting out would be to take full advantage of your surgery recovery period when you cannot est normally, and DROP ALL SWEET FOODS PERIOD. Go very low carb, and make your carbs be fibrous veggies and seeds etc. Avoid sweet tastes. Many Bariatric products are full of sweeteners, keeping your palate and gut bugs preferring sweet tastes. Avoid them. Seek the salty tasty ones. Use unsweetened, unflavored Protein powders. My doctor’s Nutritionist told us to avoid fruit for 6 months. I did. Thereafter, only 1/2 c berries or less a day. You don’t ever need fruit while you are losing weight. It’s a great opportunity to reset your diet. The gut bugs who love sugar will die out and they are the ones who give you that craving. Take advantage.
Another diet thing I learned from keeping meticulous track of what I ate was that 50% of my diet was fat. Healthy fat. And I continued to slowly lose the weight, almost daily, by eating the meats, eggs, dairy, and butter that I ate. All from healthy, Grass fed, pastured animals. Raw whole milk. A very clean healthy diet with a ton of fat. I just steadily kept losing. I’d heard fat doesn’t make you fat, but now I KNOW it.
Good luck to all. One of these days I will post my before and after pics and measurements. Sorry such a novel here,

It feels unbelievable. I still CANNOT BELIEVE I could go into any shop in the mall and find something that fits. When I could buy at LuluLemon I think I head tears in my eyes. They only go up to a 12. I’m not crazy about shopping but I CAN buy regular clothes. The biggest thrill for me clothes wise is I AM WEARING CUT OFF JEANS and I look normal. I’m not thin, I’m normal.
I can ice skate or run along the beach with my child. WHAT?? And I don’t look ridiculous. And I love just playing and running and whatever. I jump on a scooter and go ride with the kids. Unbelievable. It feels so good.
I have a new relationship with food. My breakfast is always the same and always with the eggs as Protein. I need it. It just IS. My food is fuel, also mid day I need that protein powder still, which I add to full fat plain Greek yogurt, maybe throw a couple berries and some flax seed in, take it in my lunch. So the first half of the work day, food is just fuel based on the protein I will need.
dinner is protein and veggies, pretty utilitarian, but I get into cooking as I always have, and it might be any kind of ethnic taste. And my dessert or late night snack is always either my homemade seed based granola with raw milk, eaten out of a tiny snack container so the amount is always the same, or my beloved 92% dark chocolate which is not candy, it’s not even as sweet as fruit. It is just a fatty, healthy, antioxidant snack. But to me it’s chocolate and yummy because I don’t eat anything sweet any more.
please believe me cause it’s true: I hope every day that I will get my workout in. 4-5 days in the week, I do. I care for my mom and kids so there are times I don’t. I actually really want to do it now. I never thought this would be me.
‘So the obsession is positive, if that makes any sense. Instead of being worried or concerned or guilty about my eating or working out, it’s just part of my life now fo real. And it seems weird. I hope I can stay like this forever. It’s only the end of year one.

It's easier. Being thin is easier than being fat. No more worries about fitting into seats or sliding through tight spaces. Moving my body is easier. Buying clothes is easier, everything fits, huge choice of styles, and even the cheapest T-shirt looks good. Mostly, though, my change has been mental. When I was fat I felt judged by other people all the time, especially when I was food shopping or eating in public. I imagined people thinking, "Why is that fat person eating (or buying) ice cream? She doesn't need ice cream." Whether or not people actually thought this I don't know, but I always felt they were. Yesterday I was eating an ice cream cone and window shopping and didn't feel like anyone noticed. Seven years out and thin is a marvelous gift.

I had a wiseacre doctor look at me and say Funny,your X-Ray says your skeleton is Thin! Don't think he graduated from the patch Adam's MD school of Humor!

1. Remember that Bariatric Pal is a business. If you appreciate the boards, throw Alex a bone and actually BUY something to support his business. It's a pain in the arse to run a board like this. Open your wallet once in a while...the products are awesome and it's the least you can do.
2. Don't stay too long. One day you're gonna come to this place and it's gonna be more negative than positive for you. In the beginning, it's a lifeline. By the time you've read the board for a year and seen the full cycle of repetition and mental health issues here.....it's not a lifeline anymore. It can become a kinda toxic habit. Part of recovery is leaving the hospital. Know when it's time to pack your bag and go!
3. Remember that intimacy moves at light speed on the internet....but real trust is nearly impossible until you take your relationship real world. Message board friendships are real friendships...but they're different. Don't expect more than what's realistic, and be careful out there!
4. Everyone is going to have their own recipe for and perception of success. Lotta ways up this mountain. Live and let live....you'll live longer.
5. No person on here is an expert in how to do this...for anyone but themselves. No one can save anyone else...and they shouldn't try.
6. If you're happy with your results, you're doing it right for you.
7. Never lose your sense of humor. If you can't laugh at this board...even when some dork is heckling you....you're taking it way to seriously.
8. "but the vets needs to staaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy!" No, they don't. Really...they don't. They have lives (we can hope!) and mentoring others is an unpaid job. And again, even your most successful vet....who is an expert at making this whole thing work for themselves.....does not know what is best for you. They don't. You do. Vets are people, too....some are awesome, some are toxic. Trust yourself. You can do this.
9. But there's so much contradictory information...what's the best way to go? That's up to you. And will be different for each of us. Keep trying. if something doesn't work, try something else. Just don't give up!
10. Wishing you all the very best. Adios!

Thanks Ash .... you're right on every point.
What I tell myself is he had the absolute best of me for 7 years. And his embarrassment over my appearance mattered more to him than anything else. I can change my weight (and I am!), but he can't change his shallowness

Many, what I would consider, very. honest and factual answers on here. @ neversaynever I am awarding you the Uber-trophy. Not only do i feel your phraseology is superior, but I enjoy your pen name as well. You are saying " World - Never count Me Out!" Strong will and an defiant attitude will take you far!😝

My body fat was somewhere around 50% when I started the program (may have been 53% if I remember right). Right now, I'm 2 years out and trying to boost muscle even more - I'm around 31% and headed to 28 as my goal, which for a post-menopausal woman would be outstanding.

Hi everyone!
It's officially been a year since my SIPS (aka Modified DS) with Dr. Roslin at Lenox Hill and I couldn't be happier!
I am down 125 lbs and 25 BMI points. I had my one year check-in and everything looks good, and they told me I don't have to lose any more weight (although I think I'd be comfortable losing 5-10 more and toning.)
Now I'm planning for a Tummy Tuck and brachioplasty in a few months once my weight is stablized.
This surgery is so worth it; I can't believe the difference, not only physically, but emotionally and mentally as well. To everyone thinking about doing this or who has and may be struggling: keep at it. You won't regret it.
#transformationtuesday