cat17

I'm three weeks out (HW 260, SW 240, CW 225). Today I had the thought that I don't care about food! I had to force myself to eat?? This is a shocking thought for me because I've suffered from binge eating disorder for over a decade. I've been in therapy for two years to work on all my causes. The sleeve is part of my attempt to finally make the changes I've worked so hard on. I told myself the sleeve would help, but I couldn't really believe it because I couldn't imagine ever having the strength/willpower to overcome my beloved food. Even as I write my brain is saying that tomorrow I'll probably go back to my old self????
Please don't read me wrong, the past few years have been so hard. This surgery and all these changes haven't been a cake walk and I know I've only just begun...
I just needed to tell others that can relate to me that I'm just happy in this moment. In this moment, even with my doubting mind, I feel good. Like I can actually do this.

I'm three weeks out (HW 260, SW 240, CW 225). Today I had the thought that I don't care about food! I had to force myself to eat?? This is a shocking thought for me because I've suffered from binge eating disorder for over a decade. I've been in therapy for two years to work on all my causes. The sleeve is part of my attempt to finally make the changes I've worked so hard on. I told myself the sleeve would help, but I couldn't really believe it because I couldn't imagine ever having the strength/willpower to overcome my beloved food. Even as I write my brain is saying that tomorrow I'll probably go back to my old self????
Please don't read me wrong, the past few years have been so hard. This surgery and all these changes haven't been a cake walk and I know I've only just begun...
I just needed to tell others that can relate to me that I'm just happy in this moment. In this moment, even with my doubting mind, I feel good. Like I can actually do this.

Some of us have to reach rock bottom in order to make positive changes. I was morbidly obese and close to being wheelchair bound. I had no life. I couldn't walk a block without having to sit and I live in NYC...a place where everyone walks.
I couldn't travel, couldn't play with my granddaughter, couldn't do much of anything...except eat. And eat I did...even though every forkful of food meant I was jeopardizing my mobility even more.
I had the band put in nearly four years ago. I've been in therapy for more than two years as I needed to work on the core issues of why I was fat...and how to not get fat again. I had both hips replaced less than a year after my band. I still have issues because of the damage I've done to myself and need to take anti-inflammatory and pain meds.
On the good side, is that after this up and down voyage, I am living life again as a normal sized person. I can walk just about anywhere..albeit in pain at times. I run after my new grandson who just turned a year and a half. I have a wonderful man in my life again and I never expected that would happen. Never. I say a prayer of thanks everytime I lie in his arms or take his hand when we go walking. I went to London on vacation last year...something I've wanted to do for so long...and thought I'd never be able to do. Next spring, I go on a two week trip to The Netherlands, Russia, Finland, Germany, Iceland, Norway, and Estonia. To me, this is truly miraculous considering where I was before surgery.
Understand that for many of us, the weight is a symptom of something much deeper than just food. I would suggest you continue with therapy....and for however long it takes for you to understand your motives and to try to change your behavior. It's not easy and I find this part of my weight loss journey harder than the losing weight part.
Thank you for sharing your story with us and know that you will find a sympathetic sounding board here and the support you need at least in this virtual world we inhabit.

Thank you for sharing and reaching out for some help!! First, I don't think we are being punished by any means. But...I know for a fact that research has shown that being overweight isn't always something we choose. That food ADDICTIONS are REAL!! So many things can start us out using food to heal our hurt, be it physical or emotionally. If you are addicted to food then think of it like you being addicted to smoking, drugs, sex whatever it is!! The definition of ADDICTION: the fact or condition of being addicted to a particular substance, thing, or activity. Compulsive physiological need for use of a habit-forming substance. ADDICtION a primary, chronic disease of brain reward, motivation, memory and related circuitry. Now I'm not saying that all overweight people are addicted to food but lots are. Myself I have had an addictive personality my whole life. Maybe it wasn't food to start with but in other issues in my life. I used to say that I was either (pardon my way of saying this but it is true)Balls to the wall or nothing!! I am learning it isn't just all or nothing in my choices. I am so sorry that you feel like you are so broken, you are a man that is seeking comfort in the way that has always worked for you. IE: FOOD. I hope everything works out for you and I look forward to following your journey!! If you need to vent I'm here anytime!! Congratulations on deciding to have your WLS.

I agree, you should most definitely mention this to your surgeon. Then you should ask for a referral to a therapist. Talking to a qualified person has been a tremendous help for me.
As L.L. Said eating is a different type of addiction. We need to eat to survive AND thrive, unlike using drugs or alcohol. I had a raging alcoholic (mother) tell me for years that " I only needed to cut back to lose weight." My "cutting back" and a lifetime of emotional abuse got me to nearly 300 pounds! For the first time in my life I am taking care of me. I am only six weeks out, but feel very hopeful about the future. Best of luck to you and remember to take one stage at a time.

Amazing!!!!

Thanks for this thread--it's so inspiring and uplifting!!
I can't wait to buy cute clothes, stitch fix even? To feel healthy and confident, to play wildly with my five year old, to try running, to go camping, biking, and maybe even rock climbing again. I want my life back please. Oh, and maybe I'd go on a date again?

Thanks for this thread--it's so inspiring and uplifting!!
I can't wait to buy cute clothes, stitch fix even? To feel healthy and confident, to play wildly with my five year old, to try running, to go camping, biking, and maybe even rock climbing again. I want my life back please. Oh, and maybe I'd go on a date again?

Thanks for this thread--it's so inspiring and uplifting!!
I can't wait to buy cute clothes, stitch fix even? To feel healthy and confident, to play wildly with my five year old, to try running, to go camping, biking, and maybe even rock climbing again. I want my life back please. Oh, and maybe I'd go on a date again?

My date is Nov 8th, 2 weeks only liquid diet. Day three today and my headaches are clearing up. Felt a burst of energy today too...VERY worried about the weekend as I won't have work to distract me from being hungry.
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Welcome! I was self-pay in Mexico, so I did not have a local support group either. I found this site to be invaluable throughout the whole process. I hope it serves you well too! Definitely don't hesitate to chime in on threads or post questions.

So I am out of surgery. Drinking my 4oz, doing my breathing and walking my laps. Kinda in a little pain and my incisions keep bleeding but other than that I'm doing well. Thank you guys for the wishes. I really appreciate it. . . @@Caribear @@Butterflywarrior @@blizair09 @@laceemouse @@nurse82 @@PorkChopExpress

Taking it one day at a time 16lbs down
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If this is new information to you, then clearly you weren't a serial WWs member like I was. (Please read my "tone" as good natured fun, here.)
I'd dare say most of us knew of those outrageous numbers and...
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ATE IT ANYWAY!
Like WTF?!?

How do you get over the guilt of being fat?
For those of you who used to be thin, and gradually gained weight over the years, how did you handle this?
For those of you who were overweight or obese as children, what is the point where you stop blaming your parents for "making you fat", and actually take personal responsibility?
How do you handle comments from others who simply think that if you "just put down the fork", you can lose all the weight you need?

Keeping my secret, and getting comfortable with the little white lies I have to tell to do so.

Thank you! It's so encouraging to hear success! I hope I have the same
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I am a brand new member. I'm 39 and scheduled for gastric sleeve surgery November 8th. I'm self-pay, and am not going to a support group, so I am looking to make some connections with others who are going through this.