biginjapan

@New2Me2020
I had to go from my iphone to a computer to answer these questions. What you're asking is so important and exactly what a weight loss surgery patient should ask.
I guess my burning question is, is it okay to be scared? ABSOLUTELY! This is major surgery you're asking about. You are absolutely okay with being scared.
What if I still want to use food to cope, what if I fail, what if I die? I don't write these questions to be judged but maybe to get some wisdom from someone who has conquered these fears? That's the learning curve I think most of us worry about. After food, what else is there? I have found since my surgery on 3/3/20 that I am no focused on walking, lifting 3 pounds weights (I will add more pounds when my body lets me know I’m ready for it as I’m 4 weeks out) and stretching. Addiction though runs in my family. I am afraid after the newness wears off what will happen. I don't dwell on that though. Because my life is changing. My body is changing. I'm in therapy weekly (due to other things that happened in my life) and myself and my therapist are holding myself accountable for my actions.
I have my first appointment with psych on Friday and as nervous as I am, I am still excited. YAY!!!!! As you should be!
A few other questions:
Is it worth it/ do you regret it? It is sooo worth it! I am so happy I did this. Everyday I wake up knowing my body is changing and becoming a little smaller every day. Do I lose weight everyday. Nope. That's why I stopped weighing myself daily, but I can feel it in my energy and my clothes! I have more energy than I did before surgery even though I'm consuming way less calories and food. My clothes are becoming looser. My back doesn't hurt anymore. I can wipe my butt when I go potty (seriously, not joking....that's one of the reasons I looked into weight loss surgery because I sat on the potty and cried because I couldn't reach back there.) I know that may TMI, but it's one of the last straws that break the camel's back, as it were. When it comes to tying my shoes or putting on socks, I can now reach down and do both feet at once without having to sit up and take a breath because I cut off my breath from bending over! I'm going to be a lower risk for heart disease, diabetes and blood pressure which run in my family as well. We're just a hot mess all around lol.
Do you feel like your life is normal? YES! I feel more normal than before. I feel like this is who I'm meant to be and I'm becoming her more every day! I just want to add it took about 3 weeks before I got my energy back. So expect at least 2-4 weeks of feeling not great and questioning why in the hell did we do this at all! Read the forum, you’ll see. But you’ll also find those same ones thriving and happy and so grateful after recovering.
Can you do it with 50/50 support from those around you? 100% - I was one of those that told people I was having gastric sleeve surgery because I was so excited about it! You will have the nay-sayers. F' Them. In the most polite way possible. Everyone I told had their own ignorant, uninformed notion. "well you know so so had a terrible experience" ... "well if you really tried you could do it on your own" UGH! I looked them square in the eyes and when they paused, I said "thank you for your concern, but this is MY body. I'm doing the research and I will make the best decision for MYSELF!" Post surgery everyone now sees how happy and more energetic I am so they can suck it.

Do you have to lose weight first? I had too. My insurance is Anthem BCBS. I had to be under 6 months Dr. Supervised weight loss. I ended up losing 26 pounds. I was so scared of the 14-day liquid diet that I started substituting 1 Protein Shake a day (Ensure Max Protein) for 1 meal a day. When I was okay with that I substituted 2 meals a day with a Protein shake. *That liquid diet (if your surgeon prescribes one for you )is no joke. I also had to do heart stress test with a cardiologist, a sleep study with a pulmonologist, a psych evaluation with my psychiatrist, a note of approval from from PCP and 3 meetings with a nutritionist detailing my food journals. FYI going through all these things helped the time pass and helped me realize how much I wanted this!
I successfully made it 5 days all liquid lol. Days 14-9 I still ate one meal a day like a salad. Days 9-5 I would take a few bites of healthy food like broccoli or grilled chicken (like 3-4 bites of food in a day, I was scared of screwing up) and days 5-0 all liquid. I guess I did a good job because my surgeon said my liver looked good and didn’t even ask if I had stuck to the all liquid diet. Go figure.
Is the loose skin as bad as people make it out to be? I don't know that yet. That's why I'm incorporating walking, weights and stretching in my daily activities.
Hair loss? I haven't experienced that yet, but it's supposed to happen around the 3rd month from what I've gathered in reading other's experiences.
Tips?
Do your research. Find a dedicated bariactric center and surgeon that will advocate for you when it comes to the insurance companies if you are not self pay. Start working on minimizing your food consumption prior to surgery. These are the things that helped me.
Good LUCK!!! And congratulations on beginning your journey with these questions

So while we are sheltering in place and cooking at home here in Massachusetts, I wanted to get Thai food delivered as a special treat. And I ordered what I used to order pre-surgery: Steamed vegetables and chicken. But one of my friends was talking about bubble tea today and I wanted one. And the coconut Soup looked so good. And since I'm not going anywhere, I got a shrimp roll in rice paper for tomorrow. The food came! So exciting!
I made it through the soup and half the bubble tea before I was DONE. I totally ordered like I never had surgery. I guess I have food for the rest of the week now!
Just curious if anyone else has done this.

Just showing off my ticker because as far as I am concerned, I just reached my GOOOOOAAAAAALLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!! I mean, what is 1 1/10th of a pound anyway???
This just totally made my day after a REALLY crappy week! I work for a school, my school is closed, But this week because we just gave notice we are NOT REOPENING this school year, I have been rushing around like crazy to get a certain task done. From home of course. Plus running around to get staff what they need. And my staff has been extremely difficult during this. Anyhow... last week I almost put up a post stating that I was SO CLOSE to my goal, but I didn't think I would reach it. The scale was NOT moving anymore. And I was at a healthy weight so I was coming to terms with the fact that my body might be done. Afterall, my healthy weight used to be in the 135-145 RANGE before, and while I hoped to get to 135, I was fine anywhere in that range. But this week? OMG, the stress this week was AWFUL. My ability to stop and get myself to EAT was awful. But what I DID eat was extra healthy because since I am working from home, I have been cooking throughout the week more. I mean... not just cooking a little something for me which I always do. But cooking for the family, and meals that I can partake in. Anyhow, the last 3 days I did NOT have time to cook. But I had those healthy meals to eat as leftovers when I did eat. So... after many weeks of the scale BARELY moving (up OR down), I dropped nearly 4 pounds to hit 135.1, and my goal is 135 so I am sure after I have a BM... I am already there! LMAO
How is my body doing? Overall it looks great. Still have a little jiggliness at the back of my arms and thighs. Not too bad, but need to tone. My calves are still too big for my liking. Hoping they go away, but the rest of my legs look pretty good. My face has a LITTLE loose skin/wrinkles, but not too bad. And last but not least... my c-section belly is well hidden by clothes, but that NEEDS to go away! I know I can lose a little more bellyfat above my 3 c-section scar... I did it after my 3rd baby. It will never be flat again, but I know it can be better. So... once I am in a better work from home routine, I need to try to resume my workouts. Oh... I had been doing great with workouts until early March.... but this transition to work from home has NOT left me the time I need to do them, and by the time I DO have time to workout... I need to go to bed. So, maybe after next week I can focus on that belly. But I REACHED MY GOAL WEIGHT!

It's totally natural to be scared! But trust me when I say this, there's very little to be scared about. Having any kind of gastric surgery has about the same risk as having an appendectomy. However, the thing to remember is that the heavier you are, the more risk there is for you on the operating table (assuming you have no other major health issues which would impact this). The good news is that surgeons have been doing this for quite a while now and have reduced surgery times significantly. Of course, you have to speak to your doctor about your own issues, but I imagine you would have to lose some weight before surgery (often you need to, to be approved by the insurance company). This is not only better for the surgery itself (in terms of complications, it also helps to shrink your liver, which is important for the surgery as well), but to get you on the right track in terms of eating habits.
Also, having surgery is NOT CHEATING. It is NOT THE EASY WAY OUT. I've written about this extensively before, but basically obese people, especially morbidly obese people, have a ton of things stacked against them when it comes to losing weight. Low metabolism, lots of fat cells (which you can never lose, only shrink), leptin-resistance, insulin-resistance, food addiction, etc -- all conspire against your weight loss efforts. There's a reason why people lose weight, then plateau, then regain (probably more than where they started from) - it's the body fighting back to get back to where it was. There are lots of books and research done about this, I highly recommend the book Fat Chance as a good overview. What surgery does (bypass or sleeve) is it "resets" the body back to normal. Hunger is gone (literally - that part of your stomach gets cut out). Metabolism goes back to normal. If you're diabetic, you have a good chance of not being one after surgery. They're still not sure why this happens, but it does. And what that does is it gives you a fighting chance to lose weight and to keep it off.

To answer your other questions:
What if I still want to use food to cope, what if I fail, what if I die? This is probably why you'll need a psych evaluation and you'll have to have some kind of counselling, or group sessions, or something like that, to help you deal with these issues. A lot of people who get the surgery are able to deal with their food addictions afterwards, but you have to be careful about transferring your addiction (as a coping mechanism) to something else, like alcohol. That happens. As for dying - honestly, at your current weight, that is a reality that will come sooner, rather than later, if you do nothing. The chances of dying in surgery are extremely low, and the success you can achieve from it is worth the risk.
Is it worth it/ do you regret it? Yes! I've done it twice now - sleeve, and a recent revision to bypass. Why? Because I failed - I went back to old habits, and after a while it was too difficult for me to realise any kind of success. I'm angry that I had to do it twice, but I don't have any regrets about it. I feel great, I have a different relationship to food, and my failure the first time taught me a lot about what I can and cannot do. I'll have to be careful about what I eat for the rest of my life.
Do you feel like your life is normal? Yes. In the beginning, it's a bit harder due to food restrictions and the size of your stomach, but after a while you just get to know what you can handle and what you can't.
Can you do it with 50/50 support from those around you? I did it with ZERO support from anyone - I did this by myself (self-paid) and have not told anyone about it. Not family, not friends (well, a couple of old friends, by they live halfway around the world from me). It's nobody's business but my own. Not everyone does this, a lot of people share, but many people regret sharing. Unless you are truly confident in what you are doing, and you are confident in the support of those you confide in, you may want to consider how much you tell, and to whom.
Do you have to lose weight first? In most cases, yes.
Is the loose skin as bad as people make it out to be? It depends on the person. Your age, how long you've been overweight/obese, how much you lose, etc. all impact what your skin will do afterwards. In many cases people will opt for some sort of plastic surgery afterwards to deal with problematic areas.
Hair loss? It's common to have Hair loss after surgery, during pregnancy, etc. It happens to most people but it only lasts for a couple of months, is probably not noticeable to anyone but yourself (unless you already have extremely thin/thinning hair), and it will start to grow back.
Tips? Think of things you want to do in your life that you can't, because of your current weight. It may help you with your motivation about what to do. Educate yourself - not just on forums like this, but find real articles, books, that look at real research and make your own decisions based on that. It seems overwhelming at first, and it can take time to overcome your reluctance, but in the end it's worth it.

~Thank you all for your love and support!!!
Also how do I update my profile? CW, surgery date, type, etc.?
It's better to do this on a computer, not a phone. Go to the top of the page and click your username. There's a dropdown menu. You can update your profile there. Near the bottom of the menu is says "My Surgery" - that's where you can put your surgery information, and update your weight, etc.

It's totally natural to be scared! But trust me when I say this, there's very little to be scared about. Having any kind of gastric surgery has about the same risk as having an appendectomy. However, the thing to remember is that the heavier you are, the more risk there is for you on the operating table (assuming you have no other major health issues which would impact this). The good news is that surgeons have been doing this for quite a while now and have reduced surgery times significantly. Of course, you have to speak to your doctor about your own issues, but I imagine you would have to lose some weight before surgery (often you need to, to be approved by the insurance company). This is not only better for the surgery itself (in terms of complications, it also helps to shrink your liver, which is important for the surgery as well), but to get you on the right track in terms of eating habits.
Also, having surgery is NOT CHEATING. It is NOT THE EASY WAY OUT. I've written about this extensively before, but basically obese people, especially morbidly obese people, have a ton of things stacked against them when it comes to losing weight. Low metabolism, lots of fat cells (which you can never lose, only shrink), leptin-resistance, insulin-resistance, food addiction, etc -- all conspire against your weight loss efforts. There's a reason why people lose weight, then plateau, then regain (probably more than where they started from) - it's the body fighting back to get back to where it was. There are lots of books and research done about this, I highly recommend the book Fat Chance as a good overview. What surgery does (bypass or sleeve) is it "resets" the body back to normal. Hunger is gone (literally - that part of your stomach gets cut out). Metabolism goes back to normal. If you're diabetic, you have a good chance of not being one after surgery. They're still not sure why this happens, but it does. And what that does is it gives you a fighting chance to lose weight and to keep it off.

To answer your other questions:
What if I still want to use food to cope, what if I fail, what if I die? This is probably why you'll need a psych evaluation and you'll have to have some kind of counselling, or group sessions, or something like that, to help you deal with these issues. A lot of people who get the surgery are able to deal with their food addictions afterwards, but you have to be careful about transferring your addiction (as a coping mechanism) to something else, like alcohol. That happens. As for dying - honestly, at your current weight, that is a reality that will come sooner, rather than later, if you do nothing. The chances of dying in surgery are extremely low, and the success you can achieve from it is worth the risk.
Is it worth it/ do you regret it? Yes! I've done it twice now - sleeve, and a recent revision to bypass. Why? Because I failed - I went back to old habits, and after a while it was too difficult for me to realise any kind of success. I'm angry that I had to do it twice, but I don't have any regrets about it. I feel great, I have a different relationship to food, and my failure the first time taught me a lot about what I can and cannot do. I'll have to be careful about what I eat for the rest of my life.
Do you feel like your life is normal? Yes. In the beginning, it's a bit harder due to food restrictions and the size of your stomach, but after a while you just get to know what you can handle and what you can't.
Can you do it with 50/50 support from those around you? I did it with ZERO support from anyone - I did this by myself (self-paid) and have not told anyone about it. Not family, not friends (well, a couple of old friends, by they live halfway around the world from me). It's nobody's business but my own. Not everyone does this, a lot of people share, but many people regret sharing. Unless you are truly confident in what you are doing, and you are confident in the support of those you confide in, you may want to consider how much you tell, and to whom.
Do you have to lose weight first? In most cases, yes.
Is the loose skin as bad as people make it out to be? It depends on the person. Your age, how long you've been overweight/obese, how much you lose, etc. all impact what your skin will do afterwards. In many cases people will opt for some sort of plastic surgery afterwards to deal with problematic areas.
Hair loss? It's common to have Hair loss after surgery, during pregnancy, etc. It happens to most people but it only lasts for a couple of months, is probably not noticeable to anyone but yourself (unless you already have extremely thin/thinning hair), and it will start to grow back.
Tips? Think of things you want to do in your life that you can't, because of your current weight. It may help you with your motivation about what to do. Educate yourself - not just on forums like this, but find real articles, books, that look at real research and make your own decisions based on that. It seems overwhelming at first, and it can take time to overcome your reluctance, but in the end it's worth it.

~Thank you all for your love and support!!!
Also how do I update my profile? CW, surgery date, type, etc.?
It's better to do this on a computer, not a phone. Go to the top of the page and click your username. There's a dropdown menu. You can update your profile there. Near the bottom of the menu is says "My Surgery" - that's where you can put your surgery information, and update your weight, etc.

Is it worth it? Do you regret it:

OMG yes it's worth it! I had it at age 55 and should have done it YEARS ago! No regrets AT ALL! I'd do it again in a heart beat - and if I had to go back every year and have it done again, I would!
Do you feel your life is normal?

Not sure what exactly you're getting at here, but yes - I feel my life is normal. The first few weeks can be a little iffy - you're tired, you have to figure out what foods you can tolerate, you have to get used to the new routines, etc - but once I got through that, I felt pretty normal

Losing weight first:
depends on your surgeon and your insurance. Many insurance cos (not all, but many) require a six-month diet supervised by a physician or a dietitian, but some don't necessarily require you to lose weight from that.

Is the loose skin as bad as people make it out to be?

I think most of us who are out a couple years or more wonder why we even wasted one brain cell worrying about this. Some loose skin vs weighing 400 lbs? It's a no brainer. I've since had plastic surgery, but no one could see my excess skin other than me. I would take my loose skin any day over weighing 373 lbs again. ANY FRICKIN' DAY!!

hair loss:

I didn't have that much. Most of us do lose hair, but for the majority, it's not enough for other people to notice.

First off this is NOT an easy way out! You have to WORK for your surgery to work. And Vitamins are for life. You are making a lifetime commitment to better your health and if people don't understand that then tell them to do the damn research, because there is no EASY way out! Sorry, a pet peeve of mine is hearing the uninformed thinking that we took the 'easy' route. It never fails to piss me off...
Yes, it IS okay to be scared! It's perfectly normal to feel that way. I probably would have been if I hadn't had brain surgery two and a half years before (which to me, was a bigger deal). And risk is relatively low.
At my heaviest I was 389 (though I COULD have been heavier, I just avoided scales like the plague). I finally decided to do something about my weight after my niece was born and I feared that I wouldn't be around to watch her grow up. I had always been scared that I'd fail, much like you are. In a way I did use food to cope because I'd eat junk food when I was upset. I didn't think I'd be able to do well and doubted myself constantly. Because my willpower is sh*t, I decided to pre-diet despite the fact that the only thing they asked was that I not gain weight in my six months of required weigh-ins. I did an elimination thing where I cut out one thing a month so that I could get used to the way I'd be eating. First month I cut my portion sizes by eating smaller amounts with no seconds, second month I cut out soda, third month was rice, fourth month was Pasta, fifth month was bread, and six month I cut out Beans and potatoes. My goal was to lose 35 pounds before my surgery, but I lost a staggering (at least to me) 64 pounds before my surgery. I amazed myself at my own willpower, which was far stronger than I had thought! Losing that weight on my own helped me gain more confidence in myself that I COULD do this!
Is it worth it/ do you regret it?
Yes, it's worth it. I felt like I got hit by a bus after the surgery and for a few days I was like, 'Why the hell did I do this again?' but it gets better! It's totally normal to feel like crap after surgery lol. I had my surgery 10 weeks ago today.
Do you feel like your life is normal?
What IS normal? I've lost over a hundred pounds since I started this process and I feel much better about myself then I did and I don't regret taking this route. I sometimes wonder if I should have gone the gastric bypass route instead since my particular surgery causes some... stomach upset that at times can be troubling because it sometime seemingly comes out of nowhere. But other than that I guess I feel normal... or as 'normal' as I'll probably ever be lol. (I've never defined myself as 'normal')
Can you do it with 50/50 support from those around you?
The most important part is your own willpower. Not everyone is going to understand the reasons why surgery is the best option. Even I had my doubters, but after I had my surgery they understand a lot more. It took me 8 months to lose 64 pounds and in the 2.5 months since my surgery I've already lost another 44. Meaning I'm likely to lose the same amount in HALF the time with surgery. Sometimes you just need to show them that you were right by showing results. It shuts the doubters up! x'D
Do you have to lose weight first?
It depends on your insurance actually. Mine didn't have the requirement, but I did it anyway. I have thyroid issues so I didn't have much expectation for a large weight loss, but I was pleasantly surprised with the amount I lost and am very proud of myself.
Is the loose skin as bad as people make it out to be?
It bugs me, but I'd rather have the loose skin than the fat. I'm trying to work on the loose skin on my upper arms as that's the area that bugs me the most. However, my insurance pays for skin removal after you've maintained for a year so... I'm not so stressed about it.
Hair loss?
I've only lost slightly more hair then normal. It's really not as bad as I was warned and it's honestly not noticeable.
Tips?
My only tip is to honestly give it your all. The psych doctor, shockingly, passed me on the first try. She advised me that if I was having trouble though to make an appointment with her. My advice is if you need someone to talk to about the struggle then by all means take advantage of that and speak with the psych doc when you need it.
I wish you luck on your journey and in whatever surgery you decide on. It'll be difficult, but it's 100% WORTH it! Set small goals for yourself and don't stress over every little thing. And stalls happen, it's normal.

WOW ..... First of all welcome and there are a bunch of us here that had the same issues you do!
1. Is it worth it? This is really a stupid question but i will answer it .... You need to read my history of posts because every question you have here I have answered 20 times already! You have two options,
a. Stay the way you are addicted to food and on a direct path to disease that will make you miserable and you will end up dead shortly. You have a addiction like everyone on this site and it will kill you!
B. Put on your big girl panties get the surgery which is only a tool and get you life back, You are huge right now and i will tell you if you use this tool properly it will save you life!
NOBODY HERE REGRETS SAVING THERE LIFE AND GETTING HEALTHY! NO REGRETS
2. is life normal? There is no normal! Yes my life is better I can actually breath move and do things i never could do when i was fat, unhealthy, overweight and getting ready for the URN!
3. Support Group? F@#ck your support group. This is you decision and you have to do it, Poeple will help you and you have all the support you need right here! But WTF are you already looking for others to carry you when this is your problem, reach deep and be ice queen and get this done. Any support you get will be a benifit but you have to have the mind set to do this! Just do it!
4. Lose weight first? Depends on how you are paying. I payed cash so i did not have to lose anything just sign the papers and 7 days later was under the knife! But some insurances i have seen run you thru the ringer first. You are already reaching for excuses to not do it. Not a good sign
5. skin? Really you are worried about skin, So you have some lose skin...... Beats carrying 240 plus pounds on you heart and body that will kill you! For me as a male was not a issues. and BTW loose 300 pounds and then go in for the Mommy makeover sugery. Once again you are lookin for a out to not be healthy!
6. hair lose? Not really a issue and it does end so no long term issue.
Ok now that you know me i am a straight shooter that will tell it like it is! Do not take it personally just the facts. What i see from your post is someone who is making every excuse and reason to not get healthy. this tool will save your life bottom line and everyone here will help you do it. Read this site and look at how many people have saved there own lifes and become healthy.
Including me@

I ditto this comment. I don't want to eat a cold meal that was intended to be hot. 5 minutes between bites is a tad excessive and obvious as a secret sleever, in addition to my drastically reduced portions.

It's totally natural to be scared! But trust me when I say this, there's very little to be scared about. Having any kind of gastric surgery has about the same risk as having an appendectomy. However, the thing to remember is that the heavier you are, the more risk there is for you on the operating table (assuming you have no other major health issues which would impact this). The good news is that surgeons have been doing this for quite a while now and have reduced surgery times significantly. Of course, you have to speak to your doctor about your own issues, but I imagine you would have to lose some weight before surgery (often you need to, to be approved by the insurance company). This is not only better for the surgery itself (in terms of complications, it also helps to shrink your liver, which is important for the surgery as well), but to get you on the right track in terms of eating habits.
Also, having surgery is NOT CHEATING. It is NOT THE EASY WAY OUT. I've written about this extensively before, but basically obese people, especially morbidly obese people, have a ton of things stacked against them when it comes to losing weight. Low metabolism, lots of fat cells (which you can never lose, only shrink), leptin-resistance, insulin-resistance, food addiction, etc -- all conspire against your weight loss efforts. There's a reason why people lose weight, then plateau, then regain (probably more than where they started from) - it's the body fighting back to get back to where it was. There are lots of books and research done about this, I highly recommend the book Fat Chance as a good overview. What surgery does (bypass or sleeve) is it "resets" the body back to normal. Hunger is gone (literally - that part of your stomach gets cut out). Metabolism goes back to normal. If you're diabetic, you have a good chance of not being one after surgery. They're still not sure why this happens, but it does. And what that does is it gives you a fighting chance to lose weight and to keep it off.

To answer your other questions:
What if I still want to use food to cope, what if I fail, what if I die? This is probably why you'll need a psych evaluation and you'll have to have some kind of counselling, or group sessions, or something like that, to help you deal with these issues. A lot of people who get the surgery are able to deal with their food addictions afterwards, but you have to be careful about transferring your addiction (as a coping mechanism) to something else, like alcohol. That happens. As for dying - honestly, at your current weight, that is a reality that will come sooner, rather than later, if you do nothing. The chances of dying in surgery are extremely low, and the success you can achieve from it is worth the risk.
Is it worth it/ do you regret it? Yes! I've done it twice now - sleeve, and a recent revision to bypass. Why? Because I failed - I went back to old habits, and after a while it was too difficult for me to realise any kind of success. I'm angry that I had to do it twice, but I don't have any regrets about it. I feel great, I have a different relationship to food, and my failure the first time taught me a lot about what I can and cannot do. I'll have to be careful about what I eat for the rest of my life.
Do you feel like your life is normal? Yes. In the beginning, it's a bit harder due to food restrictions and the size of your stomach, but after a while you just get to know what you can handle and what you can't.
Can you do it with 50/50 support from those around you? I did it with ZERO support from anyone - I did this by myself (self-paid) and have not told anyone about it. Not family, not friends (well, a couple of old friends, by they live halfway around the world from me). It's nobody's business but my own. Not everyone does this, a lot of people share, but many people regret sharing. Unless you are truly confident in what you are doing, and you are confident in the support of those you confide in, you may want to consider how much you tell, and to whom.
Do you have to lose weight first? In most cases, yes.
Is the loose skin as bad as people make it out to be? It depends on the person. Your age, how long you've been overweight/obese, how much you lose, etc. all impact what your skin will do afterwards. In many cases people will opt for some sort of plastic surgery afterwards to deal with problematic areas.
Hair loss? It's common to have Hair loss after surgery, during pregnancy, etc. It happens to most people but it only lasts for a couple of months, is probably not noticeable to anyone but yourself (unless you already have extremely thin/thinning hair), and it will start to grow back.
Tips? Think of things you want to do in your life that you can't, because of your current weight. It may help you with your motivation about what to do. Educate yourself - not just on forums like this, but find real articles, books, that look at real research and make your own decisions based on that. It seems overwhelming at first, and it can take time to overcome your reluctance, but in the end it's worth it.

~Thank you all for your love and support!!!
Also how do I update my profile? CW, surgery date, type, etc.?
It's better to do this on a computer, not a phone. Go to the top of the page and click your username. There's a dropdown menu. You can update your profile there. Near the bottom of the menu is says "My Surgery" - that's where you can put your surgery information, and update your weight, etc.

I was also told to take about 5 minutes between bites but I find that impractical - especially for hot food, I want to eat it while it's hot! I do my best to be mindful however - not to eat while distracted (watching YouTube, etc.). I focus very much on what I'm eating and I chew thoroughly until there's nothing left to chew. I also try to put my fork/spoon down between bites - it's amazing how much that one simple action does in terms of forcing me to slow down and remain mindful. It doesn't last long however (!) but it makes the difference between me finishing my meal too quickly (which can result in pain), or not chewing enough (again, pain).

It's totally natural to be scared! But trust me when I say this, there's very little to be scared about. Having any kind of gastric surgery has about the same risk as having an appendectomy. However, the thing to remember is that the heavier you are, the more risk there is for you on the operating table (assuming you have no other major health issues which would impact this). The good news is that surgeons have been doing this for quite a while now and have reduced surgery times significantly. Of course, you have to speak to your doctor about your own issues, but I imagine you would have to lose some weight before surgery (often you need to, to be approved by the insurance company). This is not only better for the surgery itself (in terms of complications, it also helps to shrink your liver, which is important for the surgery as well), but to get you on the right track in terms of eating habits.
Also, having surgery is NOT CHEATING. It is NOT THE EASY WAY OUT. I've written about this extensively before, but basically obese people, especially morbidly obese people, have a ton of things stacked against them when it comes to losing weight. Low metabolism, lots of fat cells (which you can never lose, only shrink), leptin-resistance, insulin-resistance, food addiction, etc -- all conspire against your weight loss efforts. There's a reason why people lose weight, then plateau, then regain (probably more than where they started from) - it's the body fighting back to get back to where it was. There are lots of books and research done about this, I highly recommend the book Fat Chance as a good overview. What surgery does (bypass or sleeve) is it "resets" the body back to normal. Hunger is gone (literally - that part of your stomach gets cut out). Metabolism goes back to normal. If you're diabetic, you have a good chance of not being one after surgery. They're still not sure why this happens, but it does. And what that does is it gives you a fighting chance to lose weight and to keep it off.

To answer your other questions:
What if I still want to use food to cope, what if I fail, what if I die? This is probably why you'll need a psych evaluation and you'll have to have some kind of counselling, or group sessions, or something like that, to help you deal with these issues. A lot of people who get the surgery are able to deal with their food addictions afterwards, but you have to be careful about transferring your addiction (as a coping mechanism) to something else, like alcohol. That happens. As for dying - honestly, at your current weight, that is a reality that will come sooner, rather than later, if you do nothing. The chances of dying in surgery are extremely low, and the success you can achieve from it is worth the risk.
Is it worth it/ do you regret it? Yes! I've done it twice now - sleeve, and a recent revision to bypass. Why? Because I failed - I went back to old habits, and after a while it was too difficult for me to realise any kind of success. I'm angry that I had to do it twice, but I don't have any regrets about it. I feel great, I have a different relationship to food, and my failure the first time taught me a lot about what I can and cannot do. I'll have to be careful about what I eat for the rest of my life.
Do you feel like your life is normal? Yes. In the beginning, it's a bit harder due to food restrictions and the size of your stomach, but after a while you just get to know what you can handle and what you can't.
Can you do it with 50/50 support from those around you? I did it with ZERO support from anyone - I did this by myself (self-paid) and have not told anyone about it. Not family, not friends (well, a couple of old friends, by they live halfway around the world from me). It's nobody's business but my own. Not everyone does this, a lot of people share, but many people regret sharing. Unless you are truly confident in what you are doing, and you are confident in the support of those you confide in, you may want to consider how much you tell, and to whom.
Do you have to lose weight first? In most cases, yes.
Is the loose skin as bad as people make it out to be? It depends on the person. Your age, how long you've been overweight/obese, how much you lose, etc. all impact what your skin will do afterwards. In many cases people will opt for some sort of plastic surgery afterwards to deal with problematic areas.
Hair loss? It's common to have Hair loss after surgery, during pregnancy, etc. It happens to most people but it only lasts for a couple of months, is probably not noticeable to anyone but yourself (unless you already have extremely thin/thinning hair), and it will start to grow back.
Tips? Think of things you want to do in your life that you can't, because of your current weight. It may help you with your motivation about what to do. Educate yourself - not just on forums like this, but find real articles, books, that look at real research and make your own decisions based on that. It seems overwhelming at first, and it can take time to overcome your reluctance, but in the end it's worth it.

~Thank you all for your love and support!!!
Also how do I update my profile? CW, surgery date, type, etc.?
It's better to do this on a computer, not a phone. Go to the top of the page and click your username. There's a dropdown menu. You can update your profile there. Near the bottom of the menu is says "My Surgery" - that's where you can put your surgery information, and update your weight, etc.

It's totally natural to be scared! But trust me when I say this, there's very little to be scared about. Having any kind of gastric surgery has about the same risk as having an appendectomy. However, the thing to remember is that the heavier you are, the more risk there is for you on the operating table (assuming you have no other major health issues which would impact this). The good news is that surgeons have been doing this for quite a while now and have reduced surgery times significantly. Of course, you have to speak to your doctor about your own issues, but I imagine you would have to lose some weight before surgery (often you need to, to be approved by the insurance company). This is not only better for the surgery itself (in terms of complications, it also helps to shrink your liver, which is important for the surgery as well), but to get you on the right track in terms of eating habits.
Also, having surgery is NOT CHEATING. It is NOT THE EASY WAY OUT. I've written about this extensively before, but basically obese people, especially morbidly obese people, have a ton of things stacked against them when it comes to losing weight. Low metabolism, lots of fat cells (which you can never lose, only shrink), leptin-resistance, insulin-resistance, food addiction, etc -- all conspire against your weight loss efforts. There's a reason why people lose weight, then plateau, then regain (probably more than where they started from) - it's the body fighting back to get back to where it was. There are lots of books and research done about this, I highly recommend the book Fat Chance as a good overview. What surgery does (bypass or sleeve) is it "resets" the body back to normal. Hunger is gone (literally - that part of your stomach gets cut out). Metabolism goes back to normal. If you're diabetic, you have a good chance of not being one after surgery. They're still not sure why this happens, but it does. And what that does is it gives you a fighting chance to lose weight and to keep it off.

To answer your other questions:
What if I still want to use food to cope, what if I fail, what if I die? This is probably why you'll need a psych evaluation and you'll have to have some kind of counselling, or group sessions, or something like that, to help you deal with these issues. A lot of people who get the surgery are able to deal with their food addictions afterwards, but you have to be careful about transferring your addiction (as a coping mechanism) to something else, like alcohol. That happens. As for dying - honestly, at your current weight, that is a reality that will come sooner, rather than later, if you do nothing. The chances of dying in surgery are extremely low, and the success you can achieve from it is worth the risk.
Is it worth it/ do you regret it? Yes! I've done it twice now - sleeve, and a recent revision to bypass. Why? Because I failed - I went back to old habits, and after a while it was too difficult for me to realise any kind of success. I'm angry that I had to do it twice, but I don't have any regrets about it. I feel great, I have a different relationship to food, and my failure the first time taught me a lot about what I can and cannot do. I'll have to be careful about what I eat for the rest of my life.
Do you feel like your life is normal? Yes. In the beginning, it's a bit harder due to food restrictions and the size of your stomach, but after a while you just get to know what you can handle and what you can't.
Can you do it with 50/50 support from those around you? I did it with ZERO support from anyone - I did this by myself (self-paid) and have not told anyone about it. Not family, not friends (well, a couple of old friends, by they live halfway around the world from me). It's nobody's business but my own. Not everyone does this, a lot of people share, but many people regret sharing. Unless you are truly confident in what you are doing, and you are confident in the support of those you confide in, you may want to consider how much you tell, and to whom.
Do you have to lose weight first? In most cases, yes.
Is the loose skin as bad as people make it out to be? It depends on the person. Your age, how long you've been overweight/obese, how much you lose, etc. all impact what your skin will do afterwards. In many cases people will opt for some sort of plastic surgery afterwards to deal with problematic areas.
Hair loss? It's common to have Hair loss after surgery, during pregnancy, etc. It happens to most people but it only lasts for a couple of months, is probably not noticeable to anyone but yourself (unless you already have extremely thin/thinning hair), and it will start to grow back.
Tips? Think of things you want to do in your life that you can't, because of your current weight. It may help you with your motivation about what to do. Educate yourself - not just on forums like this, but find real articles, books, that look at real research and make your own decisions based on that. It seems overwhelming at first, and it can take time to overcome your reluctance, but in the end it's worth it.

~Thank you all for your love and support!!!
Also how do I update my profile? CW, surgery date, type, etc.?
It's better to do this on a computer, not a phone. Go to the top of the page and click your username. There's a dropdown menu. You can update your profile there. Near the bottom of the menu is says "My Surgery" - that's where you can put your surgery information, and update your weight, etc.

I was also told to take about 5 minutes between bites but I find that impractical - especially for hot food, I want to eat it while it's hot! I do my best to be mindful however - not to eat while distracted (watching YouTube, etc.). I focus very much on what I'm eating and I chew thoroughly until there's nothing left to chew. I also try to put my fork/spoon down between bites - it's amazing how much that one simple action does in terms of forcing me to slow down and remain mindful. It doesn't last long however (!) but it makes the difference between me finishing my meal too quickly (which can result in pain), or not chewing enough (again, pain).

YES!!!!! ^^^^this!

this is only based on other longer-terms vets I know on forums and IRL, but I think after the second or third year post-op, it's pretty much a daily battle for most of us...

quite simply, you gotta get really real with yourself. Have a serious come to Jesus moment. What's more important? THIS is the moment where you either sink or swim. Seriously.
I had gradual regain. I KNEW I was eating the wrong stuff but I ate small amounts and figured i'd 'deal with it later'.....after some scary health news, I got myself focused and back on track.
It was that day when I realized that sadly, this is a DAILY battle for me. For many WLS patient, they lose their weight, they move on, and they have a 'regular' life. Not me. For ME, this is still a battle. 6 years out. still a battle. But my health is worth it.

I understand that you may think things were working against you. My original surgery was scheduled for 1/14. It got delayed for almost two months. At one point I thought too it wasn’t meant to be. At the very end tho it went super fast. I found out I was approved for my surgery on 3/2 the day before I was scheduled to have it 3/3 and I did my all liquid diet in hopes I would have it. it was that close. So I get it.
here I am on the other side and so happy my life and my body are transforming!
Good luck and don’t give up on this experience! ❤️

Thank you so much for your reply! The reason I feel it’s a mistake is because I pushed myself I felt it wasn’t meant to be because I always felt like things were getting in my way to stop me from having my surgery. 😢😢 my doctor has me worried now because he does not want me to go outside because of coronavirus.... I am so happy so happy you reached out to me made my morning ❤️

@TashafromCT Hi Tasha! Welcome to the forum! I had VSG on 3/3/20 so I’m 4 weeks out today. You’re only 11 or 12 days out.
Girl, I feel you! For the first couple of weeks I was like what the hell have I gotten myself into. But it gets better. By the end of the 3rd week I got my energy back finally.
Now I’m not eating much more than you but I feel pretty dang good. The only things not making me sick right now are eggs, cottage cheese and Refried Beans. The source of most of my nutrition is still Protein Shakes and I’m still eating SF popsicles.
I can graduate to more foods this week but I feel as if I’m not ready and my new tummy may need another week or two. You will learn as you go along your body will let you know when you’re ready to progress...of course always follow your surgeon’s advice.
My start weight on 10/7/19 was 256.6 on date of surgery 3/3 I weighed 230. Today I’m 214!
it’s so exciting!! Keep reaching out.
there are so many wonderful people on this forum who want to share their experience.
why are you feeling you made a mistake?? You just feel like crap?? It gets better. ❤️

You are doing well so far, that's great to see. I have been pretty happy with my recovery (except for a bad case of contact dermatitis) and food and liquid tolerance is going well so far.
Why only eggs I wonder? Eggs are one of the harder things to tolerate at this stge for a lot of people. I am just starting the second week of my pureed diet, my dietician recommended trying eggs and cottage cheese last as they can be difficult for a lot of people in the early stages.
A lot of people think they have made a mistake in the early days and weeks for various reasons. Why do you feel it has been a mistake for you?

Hi my name is Tasha had a vsg on 03-19/2020.
starting weight 232 as of today 03-31-2020 I’m 209. Recently I have been feeling as if I made a terrible mistake having the surgery. I am still on liquids but doctor has allowed me to have eggs only but continue apple sauce pudding Jello all sugar free. I like to know how others are feeling out there!

Hi all,
New to this site and living in the UK - I had revision surgery on March 5th - Sleeve to SADI. 4 weeks out today!

Yeah, I wouldn't weigh but once a week. The weight will come off over time. Once I get more energy, I'm going to start to look into exercise tapes on Netflix or Amazon Prime.

Post op - Week 2 - started Purées which is great, but in a slump & kinda bummed.

No weight loss since Sunday. Going to be tricky adjusting to real foods. I know part of it is also I’m not walking enough. Gotta get it moving. Just tired and it’s grey and cold. But those are excuses.

I’m limiting weighing myself Sundays and Wednesdays so I don’t obsess too much. Here’s hoping for progress Sunday!