Amurillo04

Thank all of you guys for your reply. Sorry for not responding sooner but I believe I broke my stall as of today I lost all I gained and then some and I'm now 196.8. So about 1.6 pounds down from my lowest which I'm super happy about. I believe my problem was the amount of salt I was eating and drinking Protein Shakes. A typical day for me would be a Protein Shake that would go right threw me a leave me hungry so then I'd have a salty snack or lil crunchies. Then in the middle of the day I'd have a Protein Bar and then once I was home I'd have a lean cuisine or healthy choice that had a massive amount of sodium. I was so concerned about how many calories I was eating I negcted the other nutritional aspects of my meals. I am now eating only real foods that I make myself and I see a huge difference in my weight and hydration. Also I do not snack anymore because I feel full on real food. My only problem now is because I avoid sodium filled fake food my calorie intake has gotten way low. I'm going to work on that though. Thanks again guys.

I am extremely disappointed and disheartened by my failure so far. At first everything was great and I went from 220 to 198.4 in 3 weeks. After week 3 however I stalled which I understand is just part of the process. But during week 4 I am steady gaining weight and went from 198.4 to 203.2 on a diet of 700 calories. It should be practically impossible to be gaining weight on that few calories but somehow I'm doing it. I'm so mad that I was in onderland for so little time but now I'm back in the 200s slowly getting back where I started. I truly regret this surgery because all the sickness and discomfort it causes me is for nothing.

I am extremely disappointed and disheartened by my failure so far. At first everything was great and I went from 220 to 198.4 in 3 weeks. After week 3 however I stalled which I understand is just part of the process. But during week 4 I am steady gaining weight and went from 198.4 to 203.2 on a diet of 700 calories. It should be practically impossible to be gaining weight on that few calories but somehow I'm doing it. I'm so mad that I was in onderland for so little time but now I'm back in the 200s slowly getting back where I started. I truly regret this surgery because all the sickness and discomfort it causes me is for nothing.

I eat a lot of watermelon. It's 90% Water. So it helps me when I'm not getting all my water in
I so get tired of just drinking water all the time

After my surgery running 5 hours late I finally got it yesterday. It was a tough night for me but I'm finally feeling better.
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You look amazing thanks for the inspiration!
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Honestly it must be so hard to moderate a forum. I've seen both sides of the story, One of the first post I've seen was someone attacking a person for trying to cheer them up by saying "oh don't be down" and then rants about how fat people are allowed to be sad too. I've also seen generally "abrasive" vets on the forum who clearly have a bit of a superiority issue. Unfortunately when you have a forum on the internet these people clash and there's not much that @@Alex Brecher can do besides try to keep them peace on both sides and I think that he's doing a pretty good job with that without being biased towards anyone.
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Thank you so much can't wait to feel normal again.
It is so much better today. thanks so much

After my surgery running 5 hours late I finally got it yesterday. It was a tough night for me but I'm finally feeling better.
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After my surgery running 5 hours late I finally got it yesterday. It was a tough night for me but I'm finally feeling better.
Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

After my surgery running 5 hours late I finally got it yesterday. It was a tough night for me but I'm finally feeling better.
Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

I wouldn't suggest purposely gaining 30 pounds but if further down the line it happens then you will be able to qualify. Have you considered Mexico ?
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Honestly it must be so hard to moderate a forum. I've seen both sides of the story, One of the first post I've seen was someone attacking a person for trying to cheer them up by saying "oh don't be down" and then rants about how fat people are allowed to be sad too. I've also seen generally "abrasive" vets on the forum who clearly have a bit of a superiority issue. Unfortunately when you have a forum on the internet these people clash and there's not much that @@Alex Brecher can do besides try to keep them peace on both sides and I think that he's doing a pretty good job with that without being biased towards anyone.
Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Honestly it must be so hard to moderate a forum. I've seen both sides of the story, One of the first post I've seen was someone attacking a person for trying to cheer them up by saying "oh don't be down" and then rants about how fat people are allowed to be sad too. I've also seen generally "abrasive" vets on the forum who clearly have a bit of a superiority issue. Unfortunately when you have a forum on the internet these people clash and there's not much that @@Alex Brecher can do besides try to keep them peace on both sides and I think that he's doing a pretty good job with that without being biased towards anyone.
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First pic was taken just before surgery sept 2014. Second picture me today. Starting weight 222 wearing a size 16 jean. Today weighing in at 126 and wearing a size 0.

I was sleeved 11/16/15. My high weight was 265 and I am 5'4", female. I wore a tight size 22 jeans, and 2x or 3x tops. My breaking point was realizing a lot of the 3x clothing in stores were too tight and that was the largest size without going online.
After my sleeve I lost a load of my weight quickly. By the end of March I was down to 186 lbs. I was comfortably wearing a size 14 pants and large tops.
Then I stalled...until May 2nd!! Ugh. So depressed.
Then I started losing and got down to 176 by June 9th.
And there I've sat. At 176 lbs. Consistently for almost 2 months again.
I eat good 95% of the time still and work out. I've really bumped up my cardio and have been increasing my weight resistance & training steadily.
I haven't bought many jeans because I refuse to believe I was done at 176. However, the 2 pairs I have were getting increasingly big. I finally retired the 14's in the picture and went to a 10. I had to add a belt though and looked pretty frumpy. I am amazed to say yesterday I bought a size 6 jeans (and medium tops!). Are the jeans snug? Sure. But they button and don't create a muffin top.
The moral of my lengthy story is that I have only lost 10 lbs since March 27th, including 2 LONG stalls, yet I've dropped 4 pant sizes. My body is shifting.
I often struggle to see my weight loss (and have expressed that here) so this was a real ah-ha moment for me today.
I cannot let that number on the scale or that BMI chart dictate my success.
Thanks for reading!

I don't post frequently but find this discussion important and interesting. No one likes being told to behave better - not little children, not adults. And yet there has been cause for this reminder to be shared. @@HopeandAgony described her own particular nature and approach and I am very much similar. I do not understand or appreciate snark - perhaps because of my cultural background and my own sensitivity. I am not able to grasp the tone of it. As such I have found it helpful to read posts or responses from posters who have that type of approach with a personal filter where I work hard not to be affected. That's work that I do and it works for me.
There is a difference between tough love and brutality. Delivery is part of it. Words are the other. I have met a lot of people in real life who think they are "just giving tough love" but really they are just being brutal and hiding behind that line. Yes, no one should have to hand hold or coddle but beginning from a place of empathy and modulating tone accordingly. Doesn't mean kiss any one's behind - just expressing ideas/opinions with a softer approach than a hammer.
I personally disagree with the notion that since this forum is part of the Internet everyone should just pull their big girl/big guy pants up and deal. I find that that kind of thinking leads to poisoned and toxic comments sections everywhere across the Internet and while we might think that no one should be affected by a random stranger on the Internet that they don't know, people are affected. And sometimes they are badly affected. I personally don't think just toughening up is the solution. I think we as grown humans can think and agree to be cordial and civil to each to each other in order to truly facilitate exchange, learning and information sharing.
The "don't read the comments" sentiment to me is not helpful and ignores behavior that is part of a spectrum of bullying and abuse. I am not saying mean comments are bullying - only that they can create a similarly destructive environment and serve to continue the disconnection and isolation that a lot of humanity experiences.
I believe that every person has strengths and value that they can share. It would be a shame to lose that or never be exposed to it because people felt driven away or shutdown .
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I wouldn't suggest purposely gaining 30 pounds but if further down the line it happens then you will be able to qualify. Have you considered Mexico ?
Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Honestly it must be so hard to moderate a forum. I've seen both sides of the story, One of the first post I've seen was someone attacking a person for trying to cheer them up by saying "oh don't be down" and then rants about how fat people are allowed to be sad too. I've also seen generally "abrasive" vets on the forum who clearly have a bit of a superiority issue. Unfortunately when you have a forum on the internet these people clash and there's not much that @@Alex Brecher can do besides try to keep them peace on both sides and I think that he's doing a pretty good job with that without being biased towards anyone.
Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Honestly it must be so hard to moderate a forum. I've seen both sides of the story, One of the first post I've seen was someone attacking a person for trying to cheer them up by saying "oh don't be down" and then rants about how fat people are allowed to be sad too. I've also seen generally "abrasive" vets on the forum who clearly have a bit of a superiority issue. Unfortunately when you have a forum on the internet these people clash and there's not much that @@Alex Brecher can do besides try to keep them peace on both sides and I think that he's doing a pretty good job with that without being biased towards anyone.
Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

@@Alex Brecher. Being a "vet" so to speak. I have been on both sides. I have been the attacker and the attacked. But, I now pull up my cute vs thongs and move on. LOL!!! People needs to learn to do that. Pull them up people. It's a internet social site not preschool. Some just have thinner skin then others, if your a thin skinned person, thicken it up or find a new place to play. I know when I have offered, I sent a pm apologizing. I enjoy coming here talking to friends, and hopefully helping some.
If you think Alex's comment was directed at you..... Probably was.... Shoe fits, wear it..
But in the end Alex.... This is your site and you can do and say what you think is best. Personally I would send the "offenders" a pm advising them of wrong doings and if it continues, delete them..... Problem solved.

I learned a long time ago, when it comes to responding to posts or giving any advice on WLS, all I can ever truthfully do is give my own experiences within a certain area....if I have no experience, then I have nothing to say.
I had the Lap Band procedure...I don't respond to threads concerning other procedures...How can I?
I haver no earthly idea who the people on this forum are, their personalities, medical conditions, mental and emotional state.
Nor do people know me....
So don't take anything I say as Gospel, but with a grain of salt, and remember what I say is only what I do or have done, and that does not make it right.
If you don't agree with I say or do, that's fine...I never expect it.
But it's also no reason to throw stones...
Listen to what everyone says, then draw your own conclusions, and pass it by your Dr.
If there is one pet-peeve I have about this forum, is when people will take the authority and proclaim "Thou shall not do BLah Blah Blah.."
If you do you will never be successful, you will surely fail.
If they started their proclamation with "this is my opinion" or "This is what I was taught" then that lightens it up a bit.
When I read one of these threads, I want so bad to jump in and say "I do that all the time...daily...and I consider myself one of the most successful people on this forum" !!!!
But I don't, at least not until counting to 100.
Every "opinion" has a "Alter Opinion"
That's what makes it interesting.

Wow, I am exhausted just going though all of these responses. I wasn't sure I even wanted to get involved in this trending topic.
I work hard to try to make sure that I speak from my own personal experiences and I try hard to watch my tone while at the same time trying to be straight forward with people.
I tend to be very outspoken in the non virtual world and I know there are times when people read tone when tone is not intended on line. I have always tried hard not to be mean nor a bully but up front and honest. When you are asking for help and wondering why you are gaining and not following the rules, I am going to call you out.
It is getting harder and harder to be real on this site. I spend a lot of my free time on here trying to give back and help people because I personally got so much out of this site. I know how important it is to have people that are experienced to reach out to and I also relish our newbies because they are so excited that it is contagious! I personally get caught up in what their new reality can be, this is what brought be back when I stepped away a few months ago.
That being said the issue becomes, if I have to really go back and read every post that I make to ensure no one will be hurt by what I have to say, that will stop me from posting nearly as much.
There have been times when I have been involved in posts in which someone is calling out that "we" are mean or bullies because they simply do not want to hear the truth. I think the truth needs to be told and I personally try my best to be kind while still being straight forward. That is hard for me to do sometimes.
I will continue to post on Bariatric Pal and do my best to be kind while still being real. If I have personally made anyone feel butt hurt, you have my sincere apology. It certainly was never intentional.
What I won't do is sugar coat or coddle. It helps no one.

As a person who has been a mental health warrior for a very long time I fully understand the reason this post was made.
For a lot of you here, blunt and what you like to call tough love is 100% your approach. It is your approach because you aren't personally impacted by that approach, giving or receiving it. That's your way life.
For someone like me, it's just not that easy. I can dissect every single word slung at me. Over analyze it. Be hurt. Be sad. Worry about it for hours on end. Every time I speak/write I analyze everything to determine how it would impact me. I'm not saying the tough lovers don't think before they speak. What I am saying is that it probably isn't agonizing for you.
Is my sensitivity your fault? No. But it isn't mine either. I don't expect anyone to pussyfoot around me. And you shouldn't expect everyone to understand your bluntness, or that it was only meant just that, tough love. Not all minds work that way.
Then there are also the people who just come out of the gate swinging if someone says something they don't agree with. I'm not excusing these people, but I am a little in awe of them for having the ability to so readily defend themselves because I most often shy away from conflict. And yes, I agree they go over board and push buttons and escalate things quickly.
I guess my point is that the people who don't understand this post might have never walked in the shoes of a person with a shattered mind. We can't just toughen up. We can't just grow thicker skin. We can't always control what "butt hurts" us. That said, we also shouldn't be banned from the internet though, like is often suggested because we are sensitive. We want and need support to and you have no right to determine what does or doesn't hurt or bother us.
The world is so full of hate. If we could all try a little harder to see each other's perspective there wouldn't be so many lines drawn in the sand.
I appreciate most everyone here. I know I'm sensitive so I avoid posts that go in a direction that doesn't support my needs. Am I ultimately avoiding conflict? Yes. But that is how I make it through this world that often leaves me feeling ways that aren't healthy for me. Maybe for you tough lovers, if a responder gets a little upset, don't keep going. Just bow out of the post. You never know what storm another person is walking through.

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Most insurances require you to be morbidly obese (BMI 40 >) or BMI 35-40 with comorbities. They also usually look for a history at these BMIs so I recommend not trying to gain weight to meet BMI guidelines.