LATINGODDESS

Wow. The fur is flying. Can't we all agree to disagree. This lady obviously felt comfortable enough to ask a personal question in hopes to not be bashed. But all anyone can do is bash her about smoking marijuana. She needs opinions from others that can relate, not ignorance from those who can't. We are all here for a common cause, to support each others weight loss journeys. Remember the old saying, if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.

Congratulations. You look wonderful.

Good luck to you both.

My final straw was in July 2015. A few days before leaving for my Florida vacation with my son and fiancé, i was at work and started to have chest pain. Slight at first, but it progressed quickly. I never felt anything like that before. My co-workers and boss were with me, they called an ambulance and rushed me to the hospital. They believed I was having a heart attack. 6 hours and countless tests later, they sent me home. I had to do a stress test, and found out it WASN'T my heart, but something called an esophageal spasm. I went to GI to have a Gastro endoscopy. I have GERD. They gave me pills and send me home. A few days later I got on a ride in universal and the restraint was SO tight, I felt like I was going to die. That's when I said, enough is enough. I have two more nutritionist appointments (ins requires 6). Then I'll be on my way. I just want to be able to fit on a ride. That's not too much to ask. Is it?

My final straw was in July 2015. A few days before leaving for my Florida vacation with my son and fiancé, i was at work and started to have chest pain. Slight at first, but it progressed quickly. I never felt anything like that before. My co-workers and boss were with me, they called an ambulance and rushed me to the hospital. They believed I was having a heart attack. 6 hours and countless tests later, they sent me home. I had to do a stress test, and found out it WASN'T my heart, but something called an esophageal spasm. I went to GI to have a Gastro endoscopy. I have GERD. They gave me pills and send me home. A few days later I got on a ride in universal and the restraint was SO tight, I felt like I was going to die. That's when I said, enough is enough. I have two more nutritionist appointments (ins requires 6). Then I'll be on my way. I just want to be able to fit on a ride. That's not too much to ask. Is it?

"But you're so young! You could have just exercised and ate less..." Yes because I should have waited another 10, 20, 30 years of unhappiness and hating life until I decided to make a change... of course! Exercise and eat less, well holy hell there's a new concept I NEVER tried before!
"You're going to gain ALL your weight back because I know 1 person who did!"

'you should just try to eat less and exercise more. Anything else doesn't work'
Or
' I don't believe you did that! That's so extreme! You're going to regret it!'

"that's not fair, you cheated" and "Who was your surgeon? Would you recommend him? I really need to lose 10 lbs" (said in perfect seriousness by someone who is maybe a size 2 at her most bloat-y time of the month).

"Well, have you tried just diet and excerise?"
Like every other overweight person on the planet, only about 100 times......

...and go!!!!!
Does your stomach grow back?
You're going to gain the weight back plus some!
I know a few people that are bigger now than before they started.
It just never ends!

@@Sajijoma that is a horror story!
There is a radio show that people call in with horrible date stories. I have only heard a few, but the funniest one was where the guy let her pick the place for their first "meeting" and she picked Walmart. She proceeds to grocery shop as they are chatting. They get to the checkstand and she expects him to PAY because "don't guys always pay on the first date?". As he retold the story he said he was so embarrased at the checkout that he did actually buy her freaking groceries...
can you imagine???

I have had a few really bad disasters, especially early on in my dive into online stuff.
A particular favorite story was a guy who looked great, sounded great, email exchange - he just seemed like a good fit. Can't explain why, but i just had a good feeling that this was someone I was going to want to keep seeing....
I was smart enough to just committ to meeting for a drink in spite of my optimism... but here is what happened...
He asks me to pick a place and so I suggested a "Tap house" in my town that serves lots of cool local beers and food. Well, right off the bat, it becomes apparent that the photo he posted was at least 10 years old, his job wasn't quite what he said and he was just plain odd. Second, he was clueless about beer - apparently preferred Coorslight to the microbrews. Then - he had weird tics. So, we get to talking and I am being polite and trying to think how to get out of this. I was starving, hadn't eaten and was visualizing exiting as soon as possible and getting myself some food. So, while I am planning my excape he says "are you hungry" - mouth engages before brain and I say "I am starving".... so then, I can't really decline his dinner request. Well, I should have declined, but I was too polite....
so, he picks the restaurant and I order a small appetizer that was a trio of seafood items. Turns out, he is deathly allergic to shellfish so he was completely freaked out about my shrimp etc. I offered to send it back, but he was like "no, it's okay as long as you keep it over there" - so I eat away and then asks about what all is on my plate. One of the items was Ahi served quite rare (as it should be) - and he says to me in a horrifed tone "You EAT RAW FISH?"
It was like a lightswitch flipped. He got over being nervous and tongue tied because he had clearly put me in the "no way pile" over my barbarian culinary tastes. Thank goodness.
The conversation got alot better as he told me all about OCD, how his dad had it, his brother is so afflicted he is basically non functional etc. We actually had a decent time and I learned alot about OCD and exterminators! So, I offered to split the bill but he wanted to pay it saying he had really enjoyed the dinner and liked that he could relax with me (not to mention my food was pretty small/cheap!).
So, about 8 months later, I decided to try "speed dating" and guess who shows up in the rotation! I recognized him immediately and asked him how his daughter and grandkid were doing etc etc. We kinda get caught up and then right before the next rotation he says to me "You are so much better looking then I remember, it must be because the lighting in here is so dim."
I supposed I should have been insulted, but I thought it was funnier then anything - given that he had not aged well, had severe ocd and worked as an Exterminator that was a showstopper for lots of people (which he hadn't originally been honest about). My reply to him was "so glad to see you haven't changed!" I was of course referring to his social skills.
I don't know if it is good or bad but the weirdo/broken people I have met since then were much much much better at disguising their "issues" in the beginning so i haven't had that kind of genuinely odd date since those early days.

At Sajijoma -
Good heavens! That was a disastrous date!

Wow I've had A LOT of bad dates, but my worst of the worst was an online date back in the day(circa 1997 before I met my husband and got married). We were on our first date and this guy picked me up in a rust bucket car full of trash and I got my favorite skirt covered in car trash ooze of some sort. He had on a dirty looking shirt and jeans that look like they'd never been washed, but I thought maybe he planned to change so I decided to just roll with it. I had a old stale hamburger bun from some rotting meal on the floor board stuck in the high heels of my boots. He stopped for gas and bought himself a drink and didn't bother asking if I wanted anything. I just said "oh no thanks I'm not thirsty" when he got in and he tried to get me to share his and spilled it all down my new blouse and my fav already ruined by now skirt! I wanted to leave so bad, but he started telling me this hardship story and I felt bad so I kept trying to go with this even thought the sirens were going off "run! Run!!". He asked where I wanted to go and I guess it was not the right thing to say, because I said, "I could go just about anywhere. I'm pretty easy!" So he tried to take me to the pay by the hour motel on the highway where all the nasty people went to get it on. Right outside this God forsaken hellhole his car broke down. I was yelling at him because A) I didn't mean THAT easy and I'm from a small town and if anyone saw me, my reputation, and my life as I knew it were going to be over. Well, so the car is dead out in front of this place and he goes knocking on doors to hotel rooms trying to get a jump for the battery, but then tells me we need to move the car out of the street, but he couldn't push it because he had open heart surgery and he isn't suppose to even lift heavy things. He had already told me about this heart condition when we were talking online so ugh I knew if I didn't push it we weren't going anywhere. So here I am, high heeled boots covered in crap, a ruined skirt and blouse, way over dressed for how he showed up, pushing his piece of crap car into the motel de skank while he sat in the drivers seat steering. I was scared someone would see me out there as that was the only thing on that stretch of highway so if you were stopped there, they knew(or thought they knew)what you were doing! So eventually this guy got his piece of crap car started and I told him to take me home(not my home but thank god I didn't have him pick me up at my own house!). We got there and he actually had the audacity to ask for another date and I just looked blank at him and said "let's not" and walked away. It was one of the worst dates of my life and actually caused me to quit dating after that until I met my now husband(also online but because I forgot to take my profile down and his response to why I said I am no longer accepting dates online was adorable).

Maybe her husband's credit would have been better if he wasn't paying her $70+ bar/restaurant tabs all the time....

Awesome. Congratulations

I totally agree with Dub. Take some me time to get yourself together. We always want to have someone by our side, but we Latinos have a saying "mejor sola que mal acompañada". Translation "better to be alone than in bad company". I spend years going from one bad relationship to another. I finally said enough is enough. I'm worth a lot more than what I'm getting. I took time for just my son and I. 2 years later, not looking, I was sent the perfect man for me. Five years later and he is now my Fiancé and my biggest cheerleader. My advice, take time for you, your knight will come

@TinyTink Good tip, I hadn't thought about practicing the chewing early.

Ok I am still in the pre-op stages, but I feel thirsty a lot and I normally drink a lot of Water in a day. The more I read about the sleeve it seems like it would take forever for me to drink the same amount of Water I normally drink in a day. Am I going to feel thirsty and dehydrated ALL the time after getting the sleeve? What do you do if you get the "stuck" feeling, but aren't supposed to drink at the same time you eat? I don't think I've ever gone a meal without having a drink too... maybe that is something I'll have to start now.

They're selling false hope to desperate people and it's a real tragedy. I too always zero in on those adverts and shows. For me it's in part because no matter how far from fat I might journey, I will always be a card carrying alumni in my head.

I spent so much money on nutri system, Jenny Craig, diet books like south beach and Atkins. Diet pills like trim spa and others.
I actually get angry because all that stuff ever did for me was ruin my metabolism even further. Yes I lost weight, hundreds and hundreds of pounds over a period of about 25 years.
The minute I took a break or stopped taking the pills or buying the food, the weight came back on and then some.
My husband recently tried that Garcinia Camobodia or whatever it's called. Another joke!
I find myself pausing on those commercials and talking back to the tv. I just feel so bad for people that are still wasting their money on crap that does not provide long term solutions.

Wow. The fur is flying. Can't we all agree to disagree. This lady obviously felt comfortable enough to ask a personal question in hopes to not be bashed. But all anyone can do is bash her about smoking marijuana. She needs opinions from others that can relate, not ignorance from those who can't. We are all here for a common cause, to support each others weight loss journeys. Remember the old saying, if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.

@@Dub ohhhh yes airplane seats .... that should be an interesting one ...
I really DO like to fly ... but I always say I don't ... because of the seats ... and spilling out onto the person next to you ... the belt extender ... don't DARE get up to use the potty ... I mean ... whats the point ...
SO NOW ... baby sister getting married in June ... gotta go from GA to NY ... So excited to try it !!!

First, congrats on your weight loss.
Second, she may be genuinely concerned. When our loved ones are used to seeing us a certain size and we start losing, we may indeed look sickly to them.
I guess it can also be a bit of jealousy as well since you said she needs to lose weight. Maybe you can use this as a opportunity to bring it up to her.
Again, congrats!!!

I fully get why they don't want smoking (all types), snuff, snuss or tobacco. Too hard on stomach trying to heal following surgery. I still find it amazing how the stomach heals and contains all the acid following surgery. But the thread morphed into an interesting discussion. Glad to be with adults who can look at these issues and discuss their concerns in a fun and interesting way with out too much judgement.
One of my favorite quotes was from a pastor who opposed Prohibition when he said "Very little good comes from the Absolute Shall." BTW if you have not seen the Ken Burns documentary on Prohibition, worth watching especially in light of the new discussion on drug policy going on today: http://www.slate.com/articles/arts/television/2011/09/ken_burns_prohibition_reviewed_a_fascinating_series_about_the_no.html