CHM

I agree that it may be a little too early for a goal outfit. Its difficult to tell where you're going to end up. Personally I'd be concerned about the mental effect of possibly buying it too small and diminishing all of the work I HAD done by becoming overly concerned that my 'goal' outfit doesn't fit. I always keep an outfit one size smaller than I'm wearing, but that is strictly because A: I want to know when I've officially dropped a size, and B: I always want at least one outfit that fits properly.
For 30-something clothing in the meantime, however, I'm another avid Old Navy shopper. Almost everything I currently own is from there. The clothes are cute enough that you don't feel matronly, but still reasonably modest for our age (no super short hems or overly revealing bustlines). If you keep an eye on the sales its quite an affordable place to stay in size for those of us who would rather not bury our new bodies in our old clothes as we lose weight. .

Hey, who are you calling a ner...wait...
Excuse me while I go back to playing World of Warcraft and reading the dictionary for fun.

I agree that this is odd. I'm glad you were able to find another surgeon who is more reasonable.
I was very open at my psych eval, revealing both borderline personality disorder - complete with its accompanying history of cutting, eating disorders, and suicide attempts - as well as my psychiatrist's suspicion of bipolar II. They didn't much seem to care.
All they were interested in was:
1. How long ago my last major episode of anything (other than depression/anxiety) was. I was just past the 5 year marker that they were looking for. Had things been even 2 months more recent, I'd have been put under a magnifying glass.
2. That I was receiving regular treatment via counselling and/or meds. I was not not on meds at the time (having been pulled off of the anti-anxiety/anti-psychotic/mood stabilizer cocktail when I was trying to get pregnant the year before), but I'd been seeing a psychologist weekly and a psychiatrist monthly.
3. That I, by all accounts, appeared to be honest with both them and myself, reasonable in my expectations of surgery (as in not expecting it to turn me into an instant swimsuit model and make my life perfect while I stuffed myself with McDonald's every day), and both aware of and accountable for any weaknesses or shortcomings that may interfere with my efforts.
Having said all of that, I must admit that I have seen a resurgence of some distinctly BPD issues since surgery. I'm in my mid-30s, so well passed the timeframe you'd expect to find such struggles. Granted I've seen a lot of change in my life fairly recently, but it's been good change - nothing you'd expect would trigger anything (okay okay...the skin hate is real, and it's deep).
I am by no means saying that everyone who has had issues in the past will see them return post-surgery. I'm just saying they could. Our medical teams watch for these things and flag our files for a reason. Just be aware. Be honest. And be forgiving of this novelette I seem to have written for you.
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I agree that this is odd. I'm glad you were able to find another surgeon who is more reasonable.
I was very open at my psych eval, revealing both borderline personality disorder - complete with its accompanying history of cutting, eating disorders, and suicide attempts - as well as my psychiatrist's suspicion of bipolar II. They didn't much seem to care.
All they were interested in was:
1. How long ago my last major episode of anything (other than depression/anxiety) was. I was just past the 5 year marker that they were looking for. Had things been even 2 months more recent, I'd have been put under a magnifying glass.
2. That I was receiving regular treatment via counselling and/or meds. I was not not on meds at the time (having been pulled off of the anti-anxiety/anti-psychotic/mood stabilizer cocktail when I was trying to get pregnant the year before), but I'd been seeing a psychologist weekly and a psychiatrist monthly.
3. That I, by all accounts, appeared to be honest with both them and myself, reasonable in my expectations of surgery (as in not expecting it to turn me into an instant swimsuit model and make my life perfect while I stuffed myself with McDonald's every day), and both aware of and accountable for any weaknesses or shortcomings that may interfere with my efforts.
Having said all of that, I must admit that I have seen a resurgence of some distinctly BPD issues since surgery. I'm in my mid-30s, so well passed the timeframe you'd expect to find such struggles. Granted I've seen a lot of change in my life fairly recently, but it's been good change - nothing you'd expect would trigger anything (okay okay...the skin hate is real, and it's deep).
I am by no means saying that everyone who has had issues in the past will see them return post-surgery. I'm just saying they could. Our medical teams watch for these things and flag our files for a reason. Just be aware. Be honest. And be forgiving of this novelette I seem to have written for you.
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@@anonmom
The most notable issue, as anyone familiar with BPD may have guessed, is the return of eating disorder behaviours. Nothing meets diagnostic criteria or anything at this time, but since around 5 months post-op I have had significant struggles with my caloric intake. At 5 months I was at a range of 800-1000 cals/day, but since then it has slipped bit by bit. Last month I admitted to myself that it was definitely an issue again when I realized that my anxiety level was directly related to the number of calories I was consuming. I was only comfortable under 300 cals. 300-399 made me nervous. If I broke 400 calories my anxiety shot through the roof. I was making decisions on what/if I ate based not on whether I was hungry or if I'd hit my Protein goal for the day, but on whether it would push me over 400 calories. I also may or may not have forcefully vomited a time or two (or three or four...).

The last time I had these issues, the only way I was able to shut down the behaviours was by leaping in the opposite direction - ignoring calories and simply eating what I felt like when I felt like it. Therefore I am not currently tracking my food. This has indeed provided a temporary solution in that I once again eat when I'm hungry and am surely getting in enough calories. However this has made me less diligent in where those calories are coming from, and carbs in particular have crept back in a little more than I should have allowed. I have now regained a few pounds (5, to be exact) over the last month since I've quit tracking. This is how I got fat the first time. I'm giving myself one more week to get my sh*t together, then I'm back to tracking, and whatever will be will be. While neither is ideal, I'd rather deal with eating disorders than undo everything I've just done. The fact is, anorexia is easier to treat. I've already had bypass - I have no further surgical solutions for obesity.

Eating disorders aside, my emotions are also pretty out of control again. Weight loss has awoken me in many ways, and after decades of being locked tightly away, feelings are once again free and loose - and very, VERY intense. I don't become sad, I become devastated. I don't get hurt, I get destroyed. I don't feel pressure, I feel completely overwhelmed. I don't simply get happy, I get ecstatic. Everything is felt very deeply, and even the good feelings are piercing to the point of pain. Almost makes me miss the days of just going through the motions with a completely disconnected plastic smile. Almost.

I agree with the other posters. My surgeon knows that the desire to have a child is my #1 reason for proceeding with RNY, and she never mentioned anything indicating this would not be the best idea. Its the weight loss itself that increases fertility and reduces the likelihood of complications during pregnancy - I believe that the type of surgery is irrelevant. The only real issue is if you get pregnant too soon after surgery. Your body needs time to recover from the major changes to its gastrointestinal system, and your weight needs to stabalize. Getting pregnant too early will not only sacrifice your weight loss, since you and your medical team will need to do everything in your power to stop it, but you'll definitely struggle to get in enough calories and nutrients, even with supplements.

Currently in North Dakota, soon to be Southern Ontario.
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I have a friend who had bypass about a year and a half ago who relied on NSAIDs for relief of significant back and shoulder pain. Her doctors are both aware of and in agreement with her use of marijuana for managing her pain post-surgery. She was also given the "edibles over inhalation" advice.

My best piece of advice is to make as many changes as you can as soon as you can, and work to get new habits and thought processes into place right away. Do NOT wait until your surgery to be 'reborn'.
As I've seen stated over and over in these forums, it's stomach surgery, not brain surgery. Changing your brain takes time, and the time to do it is NOT immediately post-op when you're fragile and healing. If head hunger and long formed habits are going to lead you to make poor choices (as they very often do...it happens), you want to learn to navigate them pre-op when you can afford to make mistakes, not post-op when you can really do some damage.

My best piece of advice is to make as many changes as you can as soon as you can, and work to get new habits and thought processes into place right away. Do NOT wait until your surgery to be 'reborn'.
As I've seen stated over and over in these forums, it's stomach surgery, not brain surgery. Changing your brain takes time, and the time to do it is NOT immediately post-op when you're fragile and healing. If head hunger and long formed habits are going to lead you to make poor choices (as they very often do...it happens), you want to learn to navigate them pre-op when you can afford to make mistakes, not post-op when you can really do some damage.

My best piece of advice is to make as many changes as you can as soon as you can, and work to get new habits and thought processes into place right away. Do NOT wait until your surgery to be 'reborn'.
As I've seen stated over and over in these forums, it's stomach surgery, not brain surgery. Changing your brain takes time, and the time to do it is NOT immediately post-op when you're fragile and healing. If head hunger and long formed habits are going to lead you to make poor choices (as they very often do...it happens), you want to learn to navigate them pre-op when you can afford to make mistakes, not post-op when you can really do some damage.

My best piece of advice is to make as many changes as you can as soon as you can, and work to get new habits and thought processes into place right away. Do NOT wait until your surgery to be 'reborn'.
As I've seen stated over and over in these forums, it's stomach surgery, not brain surgery. Changing your brain takes time, and the time to do it is NOT immediately post-op when you're fragile and healing. If head hunger and long formed habits are going to lead you to make poor choices (as they very often do...it happens), you want to learn to navigate them pre-op when you can afford to make mistakes, not post-op when you can really do some damage.

My best piece of advice is to make as many changes as you can as soon as you can, and work to get new habits and thought processes into place right away. Do NOT wait until your surgery to be 'reborn'.
As I've seen stated over and over in these forums, it's stomach surgery, not brain surgery. Changing your brain takes time, and the time to do it is NOT immediately post-op when you're fragile and healing. If head hunger and long formed habits are going to lead you to make poor choices (as they very often do...it happens), you want to learn to navigate them pre-op when you can afford to make mistakes, not post-op when you can really do some damage.

I love Pork rinds. They're one of the Snacks I keep on hand and I'll eat a serving usually once or twice a week. Crunchy, salty, bacon-esque...not a bad way to satisfy a craving.
Mine are 90 cals/6g fat/1g carb/7g Protein for a 15g serving. Not much worse than an egg!

I feel ya. Try finding a women's 10.5W. They virtually don't exist, even online. The extraordinarily rare time they do, it's never in a style I'd be caught dead in. I need my stilettos, dammit!
Why are my feet not becoming more narrow like everything else??

My best piece of advice is to make as many changes as you can as soon as you can, and work to get new habits and thought processes into place right away. Do NOT wait until your surgery to be 'reborn'.
As I've seen stated over and over in these forums, it's stomach surgery, not brain surgery. Changing your brain takes time, and the time to do it is NOT immediately post-op when you're fragile and healing. If head hunger and long formed habits are going to lead you to make poor choices (as they very often do...it happens), you want to learn to navigate them pre-op when you can afford to make mistakes, not post-op when you can really do some damage.

I keep looking for a sexy strapy pair of heels for my sweetie but in our 8 years of marriage I haven't been able to find that. I'm guessing that is because they don't make sexy strapy heels in size 3 girls...

No I don't. I'm not going anywhere anyway.
I also like the far right. If you do decide to go with the pants though, I think the red boots look better than the blue ones.

No I don't. I'm not going anywhere anyway.
I also like the far right. If you do decide to go with the pants though, I think the red boots look better than the blue ones.

My best piece of advice is to make as many changes as you can as soon as you can, and work to get new habits and thought processes into place right away. Do NOT wait until your surgery to be 'reborn'.
As I've seen stated over and over in these forums, it's stomach surgery, not brain surgery. Changing your brain takes time, and the time to do it is NOT immediately post-op when you're fragile and healing. If head hunger and long formed habits are going to lead you to make poor choices (as they very often do...it happens), you want to learn to navigate them pre-op when you can afford to make mistakes, not post-op when you can really do some damage.

Pfft...
You say that to ALL the girls.

Pfft...
You say that to ALL the girls.

If you are thinking about me in your sleep I'll count that as a win!

Or, maybe a hot dog costume---
I can hold a sign that says "Bite Me"....
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My son and several of his buddies are working for a local dairy farm in their Haunted Corn Maize.
I can't wait to go next weekend and see him in action. He won't tell me what his costume is....
I don't do horror movies and the like really well, but, I'll haul my old arse through a dark & haunted corn field at night to enjoy time with him.