Seerae3

I want to live long enough to see grandkids, I was tired of being sick and tired all the time. I was missing out on my own life.

I want to live long enough to see grandkids, I was tired of being sick and tired all the time. I was missing out on my own life.

I want to live long enough to see grandkids, I was tired of being sick and tired all the time. I was missing out on my own life.

I want to live long enough to see grandkids, I was tired of being sick and tired all the time. I was missing out on my own life.

Hehehe, payback's a b***h!

Thank you all for your comments and insight, I truly appreciate all of it. I have an extra psychology appointment next week already scheduled and my wife and I continue to talk about things as they pop up. We're planning on sticking to a paleo Keto style diet after surgery so by proxy she'll be eating more healthy. I am the cook in our family so like another person said, if I'm on a diet everyone else is too!

I want to live long enough to see grandkids, I was tired of being sick and tired all the time. I was missing out on my own life.

Thank you all for your comments and insight, I truly appreciate all of it. I have an extra psychology appointment next week already scheduled and my wife and I continue to talk about things as they pop up. We're planning on sticking to a paleo Keto style diet after surgery so by proxy she'll be eating more healthy. I am the cook in our family so like another person said, if I'm on a diet everyone else is too!

I had the sleeve. My husband is obese. He has lost alot of weight along with me and together we make better choices. What he does when I'm not with him, I cannot control but none of us are perfect anyway.

Yes, the sleeve does pose high risk when it comes to GERD.
And a bypass is high risk in a smoker.
Let's hope y'all can be a team, regardless of surgical status.

Yes, it might be different with 2 females where one is getting healthy and losing and the other isn't committed "as much." That's a broad general term/concept. Truthfully, it might have no bearing. Can't say. I can say that my partner (male) has no interest in surgery for himself, but is supportive of mine. He is however, committed to becoming healthy and losing weight. He's a T2 and so we're working really hard to reduce his BGs and A1c. While I've been doing my healthy prep for surgery, he's been doing it too. Cuz you know...I cook. So if Mama's on a diet, ain't nobody, nowhere, nohow, not eating the same thang. Even though he's been far less vigilant (and does have small servings of rice and potatoes when he's at a business lunch, he's still lost about 30lbs to my 50lbs. I still outweigh him by 10lbs and could snap him like a twig if I had half a mind to, but he's happily going along on the healthy train. No reason your wife can't too? She will get healthy by proxy if she's has commitment. (pssst, she may still be in the grips of a junkie situation with the smoking...that monkey is hard to pry off your back--and that could be contributing to her WLS decision tree)

I hear that! I'm a woman married to a woman, too.

I wish I had more concrete wisdom to offer, but my situation isn't exactly like yours. I'm having Lap-Band-to-gastric bypass revision surgery sometime in 4-6 weeks and my wife isn't -- because she is not overweight. However, I've become aware of relationship problems that can arise when one spouse has a drastic lifestyle change and the other does not, and that's something my wife and I have discussed at length. My marriage is wonderful and extremely valuable to me.

Re: smoking and surgery: my surgeon does not perform surgery on smokers, but I was one until just a few months ago. A 2- or 10-year period of cessation isn't universal, then, clearly. Is there another surgeon your wife could consult, if still interested in pursuing surgery?

If it indeed happens, though, that you have surgery and she does not, you are wise to think now about what the future might look like and proactive in talking to the program psychologist about it. None of these things are beyond your (plural "your") control, but you probably will need to do some hard work and thinking. What will it be like if there's envy of what you're able to accomplish? What will it be like if you enjoy living in a more healthy manner and aren't able to maintain respect if your spouse, without this super helpful tool, isn't able to keep up? Will there be tension if you have more energy and want to do new and different things, going out more, trying new activities, etc.? Being able to be really honest about bad feelings can go a long way toward protecting against their effects.

The best to you!

I want to live long enough to see grandkids, I was tired of being sick and tired all the time. I was missing out on my own life.

I want to live long enough to see grandkids, I was tired of being sick and tired all the time. I was missing out on my own life.

Sorry I mistyped, the surgeon said the sleeve would be a 50/50 outcome of making the GERD worse.

Hmm.. yeah, you're right! Guess we tend to put people in our own shoes when trying to imagine their situation...
To the OP, sorry if I made assumptions...

@Seerae3 mentioned their "spouse," NOT their "husband."

I want to live long enough to see grandkids, I was tired of being sick and tired all the time. I was missing out on my own life.

Don't buy too many shakes. Your taste might might change. I couldn't stand the strawberry flavored shakes after surgery but was fine with them before. Had to give away a whole box of Optifast strawberry shakes.

I bought a new Ninja blender and made smoothies from Protein Drinks. I was never a powder Protein person, but the ready to drink ones are great in a blender with some sugar free flavored Syrup and ice. Also when you start on solid foods, the air fryer is great investment. i am 12 weeks out and bought one a couple weeks ago. It is awesome!

This is going to sound simplistic...but for me...I was so happy to have cottage cheese, sugar free ices, and chicken broth.< br>I also needed stool softener, and benedryl spray for when my incisions started to itch when healing.
I have a reclining chair which is nice to find a comfy position...try to get some loose pants or a night gown.

My opp was a week ago and there is no way to say this in a pretty way, so here it comes: You will be very grateful if you bring baby wipes with you.( I never expected a constant diarrhea but it went on for about 6 days.)

The extension cord for my phone... And comfy loose clothes and a wireless bra. The chapstick. I did bring those things and a heating pad and blanket but the hospital wouldn't let me use it. They had an alternative to that but I didn't have enough strength to activate it. I never used the blanket I bought because I didn't feel like moving to get it, let alone walk around. The only thing I wish I had back then was unlimited data because their WiFi sucked.

Sent from my SM-N950U using BariatricPal mobile app

Just a note--check because my hospital wouldn't let me use ANYTHING like dry mouth spray, lozenges, gas strips, NOTHING that wasn't provided by them or prescribed by my doctor. They did provide those things when asked. But mine stayed packed.

I way overpacked!

I wore a second robe backwards so didn't need a robe.

Used my phone charger, my own pillow and chapstick.