Inner Surfer Girl

But as part of our new eating habits - shouldn't we learn and understand moderation? Shouldn't we learn to be able to have a handful of chips or a cookie or two and that's satisfying enough? Are we really changing our food habits by simply avoiding foods. Sooner or later, we are going to be invited to a birthday party for example and I think it's important that we learn to have a small sliver of cake and be satisfied with that as opposed to what we would have normally eaten at a birthday party or Christmas dinner or whatever. If this works for you - great. But wouldn't you like to have your cake and eat it too so speak. Be able to treat yourself once in a while and be satisfied with a paper thin slice as opposed to half of the cake. Do you really think eating a cookie or two will result into you eating 30 Cookies at one time or do you think that you can probably stop at 2 cookies, because you are happy with the weight you have lost? I guess I just have a big problem wrapping my head around avoiding foods out of fear. I want to eat healthier, but I also want to learn how to eat in moderation. It is so hard to communicate the difference between pre-op and post-op life. I am glad to see you are trying to understand, but in a lot of ways it is a leap of faith. You want reassurance that you can "have your cake and eat it too". I can't give you that assurance. I can just share my experience. My first birthday party after surgery was my nephews'. I sat next to a birthday cake and did not want it. I didn't even want a sliver. If I had eaten a sliver out of politeness, I might have gotten sick, I might have awakened the sugar addiction and wanted more or, I might have been satisfied with that one small piece. I do not know. But, the miracle was that I didn't care to try. I am one year out. I don't fear food. But, I have chosen to be picky. I choose quality over quantity. If I eat bread or starches or sugars, it better be the best: one slice of toasted fresh baked whole grain bread once in a blue moon is one example. I highly recommend that you keep reading, keep asking questions, and keep examining your relationship with food. This is a process. None of us, your wife included, can make this decision for you. Have you talked with a counselor or therapist? They can be a great resource. Have you attended any bariatric support group meetings? Have you considered exploring a 12-step recover group like OA (OA.org)? Have you read books about food addiction, etc.? A couple of books I recommend are: Eat it Up! by Connie Stapleton and When Food is Love by Geneen Roth. Journaling is also a great way to process this decision. It was a long process, but I went from 150% against this surgery with many of the same questions that you have to ready and eager to do it along with any of the "sacrifices" it entails. I was a healthy fat person until I wasn't: almost 600 pounds, disabled, practically bedbound, and without hope. A year after my sleeve surgery I am over half-way to goal and am getting my life back. I haven't eaten birthday cake since before surgery and I don't miss it, but I get to look forward to many more birthday parties and my own birthdays which I am thrilled about.

Mine was more discomfort and soreness than pain.

When was the last time you met with your NUT? It sounds like now is a good time to make an appointment.

When was the last time you talked to your NUT? It sounds like you may need to make an appointment.

Swimming! Swimming is the best all around exercise as far as I am concerned. I swim laps, do Water aerobics, use water weights, work my abs (crunches, etc.), and stretch.

I was given a prescription for something (can't remember what it was) but I didn't use it. The strongest thing I took at home was Tylenol.

You definitely don't need to go. You need to stay home, rest, walk, and sip, sip, sip. You will still be using an incentive spirometer (if your surgeon has you use one). I also had massage thingies (don't remember what they were called) for my legs to prevent blood clots. Your primary focus needs to be in healing, getting in your fluids, and Protein, and moving around. You definitely don't need to go. You need to stay home, rest, walk, and sip, sip, sip. You will still be using an incentive spirometer (if your surgeon has you use one). I also had massage thingies (don't remember what they were called) for my legs to prevent blood clots. Your primary focus needs to be in healing, getting in your fluids, and protein, and moving around.

Are you drinking enough Water? How much Fluid are you consuming? Definitely give your surgeon's office a call.

Are you drinking a lot of Water? Try drinking more. I agree that you could try to do something to distract yourself. Try taking a bath or shower, taking a walk, coloring in a coloring book, cleaning the bathroom, knitting or crocheting. Basically, something to keep your hands busy. Are you allowed sugar-free Popsicles? An extra Protein shake?

Awesome!

I found it helpful to pick one habit to focus on at a time. For instance, I slowly weaned myself off of carbonation (mostly by switching to tea, crystal light, etc.), then weaning myself off of caffeine, increasing Water, eating mindfully, etc. It can be overwhelming, but by breaking things down into smaller, more manageable tasks then it isn't as overwhelming. It sounds like you are off to a great start!

I LOVE Sonic ice.

I agree. You have already received some great feedback. I will just add a bit about my experience. I had a serious Diet Coke/diet soda addiction pre-op. Now, I truly believe it was one of the main dieting behaviors that at the very least aggravated my obesity. I didn't really believe I could give up the caffeine/carbonation. I had done so in the past for a short time but ultimately, at the first sign of stress, jumped right back on the addiction with a vengeance. I committed to trying to warn myself off of carbonation and caffeine pre-op to see if I could even do it. I slowly weaned myself off of carbonation, then caffeine, over a summer. It worked. The good news! Is that I am over a year post-op and don't miss either. I have very little caffeine (an occasional cup of green or other stronger tea is my limit). I have no desire to even try carbonation. I drink a lot of Water, enhanced water (Mio drops, crystal light, etc.), infused water, decaf tea, v8, etc. You may surprise yourself about what you can and can't do and more importantly, that some things you can do you really won't have a desire to do. This surgery is a tool, but it is a powerful tool that for me does so much more than restrict volume. It has helped me retrain my palate and practice new, healthy habits.

Also, plain water was the hardest thing for me to drink for a while. Try adding Mio drops, crystal light, or other water enhancers.

Sip, sip, sip, and sip some more.Set short term goals: for example, finish 1/2 of a protein shake by a certain time. Eat sugar free Popsicles. Put protein over crushed ice and eat it with a spoon. I put undiluted ProtiDiet liquid beverage concentrates over a little crushed ice early out and it really helped. Try different temperatures: warm broth, clear soups, decaf tea, Herb "tea", etc. I counted all liquids toward my liquid total, including protein shakes. Protein and fluids are equally important.

I'm allowed protein shakes, broth, sugar free Jello, sugar free pops and one lean protein and veggie a day Sent from my XT1585 using the BariatricPal App Then if you are feeling tired and lethargic then be sure and have another Protein shake (at least). Are you getting at least 64 oz of Fluid a day?

First, eating 400 calories a day probably won't do you any good in wright loss or being healthy for surgery. What does your pre-op diet entail? Make sure you stay hydrated and eat a lot of Protein. Avoid sugar, carbs, starches, high fat,... things that are stored in your liver. What your surgeon most likely is concerned about is the size of your liver. The purpose of the pre-op diet is to shrink the liver so it is more manageable. He actually has to lift it up out of the way to get to digestive tract. If he feels you have not done as he asked then he certainly may postpone or even cancel your surgery. It is for your benefit.

Syntrax Nectars (fuzzy navel is my favorite) and ProtiDiet liquid beverage concentrates (there are a variety of flavors).

Here is a good article from Experience Life Magazine: https://experiencelife.com/article/making-friends-as-an-adult/

Actually, I think this topic is very WLS related. In the time I have been on these boards I have seen many people with similar issues. Friendships changing, losing friends, and learning how to make new friends is more common than you think. Fortunately, even though I am basically an introvert, I got a chance to learn how to make friends when I was growing up because we moved a few times. Some random thoughts: 1) It is ok to be by yourself and do things by yourself. Being comfortable and confident alone is important for many reasons. You don't want to seem desperate, clingy, insecure when you meet new people. 2) Go places where you can meet people: take a class, go to church, join a Y or other gym, attend community events, volunteer, etc. Do things you enjoy and you will meet people with similar interests. 3) Learn to make small talk. Learn to smile and speak to strangers. (Resist the urge to keep your nose buried in your phone when you are around other people.) 4) Show a genuine interest in other people. Ask questions. You need to learn to balance interest (without prying and being intrusive) and sharing your thoughts and ideas (without being self absorbed and talking only about yourself). It can be a challenge, but well worth the effort to work on communication skills: listening, conversation, etc. Practice makes perfect. 5) Have fun and enjoy yourself. Other people will want to be around you. 6) For me, I love meeting new people and have a lot of casual friends and acquaintances, but when it comes to real intimacy, I go for quality over quantity. Also, some friendships do run their course. If someone can't or won't invest the effort and time in your friendship, let them go and move on. You may reengage in the future, but we all need space at times. I hope this helps a bit.

I definitely had to eat it with a knife and fork and chew it very, very well.

One thing that may help you keep things in perspective that my surgeon explained really helped me: Our bodies are very well adapted to a world where famine is rampant. We are designed to survive times of extreme famine. We are not designed to survive perpetual feast/times of plenty. Our modern world is killing us: cheap, easy, low nutrition food available in large amounts at every drive-thru. For me, the surgery felt like it was the best chance for me to adapt to our modern world. Basically, one way I look at it is that my stomach is now the proper size for the modern world. (My old stomach was the right size for my distant ancestors' world.)

Embrace the Stall! http://BariatricPal.com/index.php?/topic/351046-Embrace-the-Stall