reenalee

Im just soo frustrated, the non loss is really getting to me... reading the comment above where she had the surgery and isn't losing scares me big time! I have this giant fear that I will do all this only to lose like 5 pounds! its very hard to stay on the straight and narrow. tonight I made some AMAZING steaks and some sliced garlic and potatoes with herbs and butter wrapped in foil on the grill, along with some garlic and butter green beans... man the smell as I stood there over the grill in 93 degree weather ... and on the far side of the grill was my 4 oz of chicken and non garlic, non buttered green beans... if I don't lose something I swear UGH! lol keeping head up high and eyeballing the smaller clothing as I pass by it in the stores...

Im so sorry, with baseball and the holiday I got so busy! Then had a tooth infection! UGH!!!! things are slowing down and I am feeling better, I should have part 9 up by the end of the week.

thank you all! I have finally posted the next part and will begin working on part 8 as soon as possible!

WHAT DOES ALL OF THIS DRAMA HAVE TO DO WITH WEIGHT LOSS?

all this "drama" is what lead me to where I am, and helped me find WHO I am. I have met a few different people through this site who are in the same boat (if not worse) as I was in. I hope that this story (or DRAMA as you put it) will inspire those people who are hurt, lost and who feel forgotten find who and WHAT they are! I can only pray that my "DRAMA" will lead someone else who is being abused and misused to realize they don't have to live that way, they too can be victorious! They can make the changes that need to be made. My weight loss journey began the minute I realized me and my children deserved better! Im sorry if you (mokee) don't understand that, but it's my choice to write it just as it's your choice to read it...

for those of you offering help, please understand these things happened to me years ago and I have since bettered my life. thank you all so much for your concern. In the short time I have been on here I have met a few people that I really felt could use this story to advance in their own lives. It really doesn't do much justice for me or them if I say to them "I was married to a drunk for 10 years and the I woke up" there is so much more to it than that. I didn't believe in divorce! I was brought up that you are supposed to live by the vows you made in the church that day you called your wedding day, it was very important to me NOT to quit my marriage. Please keep reading, I will continue to write, I thought it would be harder to write this stuff as one of my ways of dealing was forgetting but as it turns out, it makes me feel good to remember...

part 3 is posted. Its kinda short, I have an appointment this morning but I will write more tonight before bed too! hope you enjoy

sorry! I got sidetracked yesterday, more to come this evening!! lol

I am sure I do not stand alone when I say to you, we are here for you! It wasn't always this way, I didn't used to have a supportive husband. In fact I come from a 10 year marriage where support was the last thing I would expect. My oldest three children are from my first husband, he was a drunk and drug abuser. My oldest son, the one I speak of in this blog was my ex husbands biggest fan. How heart breaking when he found out the truth and still to this day finds out more and more. I am going to add you as a friend... there is much much more to my story that I haven't even gotten to touch yet in my blogs and I think... well I hope you may benefit from it. Please, any time you need someone to vent to, to listen to you, someone who wont judge, someone for support... call on me!

I loved reading this post! I love it when people can come up in front of everyone and be like "look, I messed up a bit, but that's what makes me human" great job!

hello myla and welcome. I too just began this journey and can relate to the quitting smoking stuff... I smoked for more years than Id like to admit, recently quit honestly - I miss smoking but because I have finally cut myself from it I could never go back. I will say quitting was easier than I thought once I realized it was a mind over matter issue. Any way I wanted to wish you well and say congrats on making the choices you needed to make to live a longer healthier life for you and your family!!

I recently made a list of all of the things that I may be able to do when I lose vs. what I can do now! Its unreal.... my saying used to be "I'd rather be fat and happy than skinny and miserable" my question is why have I ever settled for either?! Times ARE changing! you go girl, you got this - I can tell

thank you so much! yes it takes a special kinda person to raise "special" people.. however the love that those "special" people show towards the ones who have raised them is an amazing kind of love! my children love me, they adore me as most children adore their moms... my two sons however show a completely different kind of adoring love lol it is so wonderful and makes all those hours of reading, sitting in doctor offices, waiting on hold for specialist ect.. all worth every second! I look forward to sharing more of my story as long as I have followers, it will serve as a great way to get me through each day

yes, my surgery date is July 10th! I have so much more to share as to how my story has lead me to here... I will get there, I hope as I share I can also heal (mentally)

this is a great beginning to your story! Keep coming back and sharing whenever you find time for you. I can relate in so many ways to your story (as I am sure many of us here can) the main focus your story gave me was what also started me on my journey... my mom! my mom will be 60 this summer, she was totally awesome when I was really young (toddler up to around age 15 or 16) REALLY active, always doing something. Our roof was to repaired on our house and she was the first one up there! Then my sister passed away, 4 yrs later my mom had breast cancer, a year later, cancer is back, 2 yrs after she went through another major health problem.. next thing you know shes in a motorized scooter! 5'2" 325#! she cant walk because she spent so much time down and out now her weight wasn't letting her get up and around... in Feb 2012 she had a gastric bypass. She has lost 120#!!! she is out walking, goes shopping now, she takes walks with her little dog... I LOVE the change it has made. I started this journey because I started feeling lazier because of my weight, I was less likely to take the kids to the pool, less likely to go out to the playground... and I realized it wont be long before I am out shopping for my own motorized scooter! I do NOT think so!! Although its sad we cant always change the paths to where we are, we sure as heck can change direction to where we are going!