jessiquoi

I have started "shopping" at GwynnieBee.com. It's a clothing rental site and I think it will be perfect for me as I go down through sizes. You keep the stuff you rent as long as you want, paying a monthly fee, and then return it free shiping and get the next thing you've put in your online "closet". I recommend checking it out if you haven't already. I can't afford to buy work clothes in every size I'll need between here and there... I've been big so long that all my clothes are worn out and ready, SO ready to be replaced.

@@Mick, thanks!

Ken S., it's all good now! it is definitely an updated version i'm looking at.

@@esskay77, i'm on a low carb high Protein 1500 calories/day meal plan for three months. I eat "normal" food. I've always had great nutrition, also... I love healthy food. I just eat too much of it too often. Ugh. I hate posting negative stuff. I'm generally an incredibly optimistic person. I am so much harder on myself than anyone else. If I read this post from someone else, I would be all rah rah let's go you can do it. I wish I could blame it on my period, but I lost that excuse when I hit 50. thanks, Butterflyhigh for your post. I think I posted this mostly for me, and not for the replies. I feel better after dumping it out of my head.

You know, @@LipstickLady, I'm not really sure. You always ask the hard questions! I think I just wanted to say it out loud, and I deserve whatever replies I get. I am an overachiever, and a successful person in every area of my life except for weight loss. I'm always the person who motivates, educates and comforts the world, and it's so very very hard for me to be not good at something. It is incredibly humbling for me to admit in public that I screwed up without having a solid plan for fixing my screwup. I am afraid of failure. I hate being afraid more than anything else.

I have been doing ok on my 3 month supervised diet... not great, not too sucky. The first month I lost 5.6 lbs, everyone was happy happy joy joy. The second month I stayed exactly the same, and the surgeon's team gave me really bad guilt and made me feel like I was not doing a great job and was in danger of not being approved. I'm an emotional eater, and I haven't quite broken that habit yet, although I've been working on it very hard. My boyfriend is very helpful, and listens while I fight myself almost daily not to eat crap. I win a huge majority of the time. However, the guilt they laid on me (and I accepted, I admit) really caused my eating to get out of control again. I wrote about that and got the great reply to call my insurance company to find out my actual requirements. So, I called my insurance company and found out that as far as they're concerned, I only need to show no gain in three months. That made me feel much much better, and I got back on track, and in the last month I lost another 5 lbs. Tomorrow is my last weigh in. But. My boyfriend went away for the weekend, and I binged. I actually put back on the 5 lbs I lost. I'm so ANGRY at myself. I'm projecting the reaction from the team when I go to the office tomorrow to weigh in. And now I'm playing all kind of games, the kind that I hate, to try to lose the weight again by tomorrow. I'm drinking coffee, which I usually don't, cause it makes me poop. I brought two apples with me to the office and am planning on eating nothing else during the day. I've got my Water pitcher filled up on my desk, and will flush myself out as best as I can. I was in such a good place on Friday, and now I'm a friggin mess. I don't want to hear anybody tell me that I may have trouble after the surgery since I can't stop self-sabotaging now, please. It was very hard for me to lay this out there in public, so please think twice before you reply with any negative thoughts. I just want to be as honest as possible here on the boards because I believe that every post has the potential to help someone. God, I can't wait for this fakokte journey to be over.

@@Ken S., i'll check when i get home to be sure. stay tuned!

wishing you strength and an easy journey!

wow, that's the first i remember reading about smelling bad! thanks for sharing everything. you look wonderful!

you look magnificent, and i bet you feel even better! congratulations.

@@Ken S., i still didn't see an update button, BUT i am now able to get in the app and everything is working fine today. thanks!

@@Ken S., i'm not sure what version i'm using, i'll check when i get home (tablet's there). here is what happened: 1. i opened the app on my tablet 2. i got the message from you saying i needed to upgrade, click here for android users. that's the only page i can access at this time. 3. clicked there and was brought to google play store's bariatricpal page, saying that it was installed, but showing no upgrade to install 4. that's where i'm stuck. can't find any upgrade anywhere, and can't get past your message on the app. thanks for any help you can provide! i'll check for version in about 3 hrs from now.

i use the app on my android tablet, and since i got the notice to upgrade, i can't get it to work.

y'know, three weeks isn't really THAT long. it sounds like going to the wedding is a definite, and i'm sure that if it's that important to you, you would rather have a good time dancing and socializing with your friends and family instead of feeling off and worrying about the way you feel.

you were beautiful before, and now... wow!!! fantastic job!

the last time i tried to access it on my tablet, it told me an update was required, and since then, nothing works. i'm bummed, now i can only use it when i'm at work and on a "real" computer.

it must be so frustrating, but try to remember that all of these tests are truly for our own good. wouldn't you prefer something be found before surgery and treated rather than during surgery where it caused a problem? the waiting game sucks, i know... i'm still in it too... try to focus on the end result, and how much healthier you will be after your surgery.

boy, i'm glad to hear that some of you had better turn around times than a month. i have aetna also, and am expecting to be submitted for approval some time next week after my last weighin... and i've been counting on getting my surgery in october. reading about a one month turn around is a bit depressing. i would be calling them every day to check up on it -- patience is NOT my strongest virtue.

best wishes, Bernie!

@, that must be so disappointing. maybe your surgeon will have a cancellation... i hear people back out of this frequently in the home stretch. maybe, let them know if a cancellation occurs you're interested in taking it?

i think it's going to be easier for you two, if you eat your meals together. misery loves company, right? as far as both of you recuperating at the same time, i hope her boyfriend and/or your little brother are the helpful types. some people do this without anyone helping out the first few days, but i'm thankful i will have someone home to help out. that's the only thing i can think of in answer to your question.

really, only you can tell if you are going to be satisfied. i don't see why you couldn't try maintenance for a while, and then reevaluate in a month or two.

my insurance company says no gain, but doesn't care how much i lose.

congrats!!! looking good!

are you both having it at the same time? do you live together? is anyone else living with you both?