JerseyCityGal

Yes, and I also notice other things like how much they drink and what poor choices they make. I do not say anything but now that I not busy eating the whole time I have time to really see others.

I would say something like "Mom, you know reality tv isn't exactly "real", right?" along with a sideways look.

I'll get real with you too ... and believe me, I'm being realistic, not mean.
PCOS makes it much harder to lose weight, but not impossible. I lost 70 lbs at one point through diet and exercise. It can be done. I went through early menopause so my symptoms are pretty much nonexistent now, but women with PCOS can lose weight. It's harder and slower than the average person, but I did it and I didn't have superpowers. Don't use PCOS as your catch-all excuse. Lots of women with PCOS have the surgery.
I've been a vegetarian for 30+ years and I have to tell you, as far as weight loss and real nutrition, your diet is crap. Bagel with butter? Skipping a meal? Chickpeas (btw, I love them) have 45 carbs in a cup and close to 300 calories. 1/4 cup of feta is loaded with sodium. A cup of quinoa has 39 carbs. Where's the Protein? You think you are eating a lot healthier than you are.
You're not in "great health". You're 5' 4" and almost 300 lbs. You are a morbidly obese woman who is used to walking. Not having a heart attack at this very moment doesn't mean you are in "great health". What you are is someone whose body hasn't started showing the signs of breaking down yet. The key phrase is started showing. It's breaking down. You can walk? Great. We're SUPPOSED to be able to walk without effort. You're not getting the Gold Star of Health because you can still walk and you don't have obesity hypoventilation syndrome ... yet.
I weighed 268 and was 52 when I decided to look into surgery, and I could actually sprint, touch my toes, run up the subway stairs, walk for miles, you name it. I also had a family history of people dying in their 40's and 50's, and if they made it to 60, it wasn't for long. I really didn't want to die. That was the tipping point for me. I was in my genetic "dead zone". I was 53 when I had the surgery, and I'm 54 now. I'm confident I'll live to see 74.
Have you seen any 5' 4" 300 lb women in their 70's and 80's walking around? No. Do you know why that is? It's because there are aren't any. They are all dead.
If you aren't ready for surgery or just plain don't want it, there is nothing wrong with that. It's not for everyone. If you want making it up the stairs to your house to be your personal best, go for it (and I'm not being sarcastic). Sometimes people are happy with the way things are and don't adapt well to change. I had this sort-of uncle who lived in his mother's basement his entire adult life. He had a pool table, a full bar, a dart board, state of the art (for the 1960's) stereo, color tv (a big deal back then), fridge, some type of velour sofa and a bed. The only time he would leave was to buy beer and Slim Jims. He was truly happy. His whole life was spent in that basement. He loved being down there until the day he died.
I personally am so grateful for my surgery. Every day I wake up and think about what I was this time last year. I ate clean before, but now proper nutrition is a priority. So is exercise and making the best possible choices for me at all times. What I put in my mouth, what I do with my time, what I will accept from myself. My personal standards for myself and my goals are a thousand times higher and it really shows.
Is there something you are afraid of? There are some downsides (like sagging skin), but it's small potatoes compared to all the health and personal benefits. I don't pray to not die in my sleep every night before I go to bed any more. I'm not jonesing for Bagels any more. I get excited about working out. When stuff happens, I have to deal with it instead of eat. The happy switch has been turned on for me. I wish I had done this years ago.

I love Chike. They even have a coffee flavored one, along with all their other delicious flavors. I actually look forward to drinking them. I add ice to the blender and make them all shake style.
FYI, the coffee flavor is cheaper on Amazon than on the Chike Nutrition website.

There is TONS of stuff on the web that you can look at for free to tell you what to do.. seriously.. you can look at youtube for form, but the biggest thing is to lift heavy weights.. do some cardio.. do that every day.

I think a lot of us see the same excuses that we told ourselves before deciding on surgery.

I have PCOS too, and you are eating more than you describe in your post. I'm sorry, but it is true. I'm active, I go to crossfit, I run, I bike, I spin.. but I eat too much food.. Too many carbs, and too much sugar. When I lower my carbs, watch my calorie intake, i lose. Slowly, but I do. My problem is I eat too much and am always 'hungry'. I'm hoping the tool of the sleeve will help my portion problem.

If you are not ready to commit to the new lifestyle, then you are not ready to commit to the new lifestyle. It is that simple. There is nothing wrong with that. It is your choice. There is no use having surgery if you don't think you will stick with the rest of the program. You could possibly do more damage than good.
Good luck with whichever option you decide!

I am 55 years old. It took me years to get to the fabulous weight of 250 (60 gained in the last year due to quitting smoking....yes I said 60 pounds). I tried every diet out there and even ordered strange concoctions over the internet. Today I am 10 days out of surgery and have already lost 15 pounds (lost 24 on my own before surgery) I can honestly tell you that I know that my life in the next few months, my activity level, my physical health, my hip, knee, back, feet pain are going to dramatically decrease. I am so excited about the future! I was so afraid to have the surgery. I told myself that I lost 24 I could get the rest off, and I probably could have....but it would just return with a vengeance and bring a few pounds of friends. I finally had enough and decided to live this next chapter of my life for ME. I talked myself into looking at the surgery as a gift to myself. I can already tell it is one of the best gifts I have ever gotten. Educate yourself, sweetie. Read all that you can on morbid obesity and the effects on the body's organs. It is not pretty. I sure wish I would have had the means to do this surgery years ago, but I didn't, taking care of 3 kids and putting them through college and an invalid mother took all of my time and resources. Be kind to yourself, educate yourself, ponder and come to your own decision. Everyone has tried to get you to "see the light", but only you can open the blinds. Good luck on your journey, may it be a happy and healthy one. I wish you only the best.

@, since I'm the one who made the "... until they hit rock bottom" comment that you took exception to, I'll clarify why I said that.
I wasn't being as snarky as you think I was when I made my earlier post. I meant what I said. Many of us (not all) already hit our individual rock bottoms, however we defined that. If you aren't at your rock bottom now, you may be one of those who has to do so to demand change.

You're not 40 yet. You're 5'4" and weigh 270. You have PCOS. Fortunately, you can still exercise some (do light yoga, walk at Disneyland) and carry on some activities of daily living, although I bet you don't do some things you used to be able to do.
Here's the problem: You won't remain 40. You won't remain 270 pounds. You won't remain as active or able as you are now. Why? Because nobody does. Unhealthy, heavy people who can't lose weight just get heavier and less mobile and develop more and more comorbidities.
You could wait until you're 42 years old and weigh 300 pounds. Or 45 and weigh 350. Or 50 and weigh 450. You could wait until you're no longer able to leave your house before you are desperate to change your life.
When you came here, you engaged with people who already realized they were past a point they could tolerate. Before surgery, we too were nervous, afraid, not sure what the future held, uncertain that we would be among the successful 50% of WLS patients. But we still leapt into the unknown.
Most of us rejoice that we leapt, because our lives are so much better than they were pre-op, which makes some of us (including me) a tad evangelical about WLS. BTW, if I had found another solution to my weight problem that worked better than WLS, I'd be evangelical about that instead.
Finally, I do agree with @@Kindle who said, "... in the end, you need to be 110% committed to the emotional and mental part of WLS or you will be miserable and the surgery would have been a waste of time and money."

@, you've received a great deal of feedback on this thread. Without even engaging in the discussion about your nutrition, I can honestly tell you that no one, not a single person on this Earth is healthy at your height and weight.
Part of the blinders obese people tend to wear is that they are "healthy fat", when there is really is no such thing. It's an oxymoron. Internal damage is being done to your body every single moment. It is 100% guaranteed that your weight will "catch up" with you, and those internal problems that have been ignored, overlooked, or assumed to be non-existent, will appear with a vengeance. It is that vengeance that many refer to as their rock bottom.
With probably 150 extra pounds on your frame, your heart is forced to function at a capacity it is not designed to do, nor can it withstand doing infinitely. Your joints are under massive and excessive pounds of pressure that cause permanent damage. The list goes on and on....
I have no idea if WLS is right for you. I have no idea how problematic your PCOS is for you. Yes, PCOS makes it difficult to LOSE weight, but how you GAINED your way to 300 lbs is what needs to be examined in your process of considering surgery. Even with PCOS, a person eating balanced, nutritional meals with correct portion sizes and consistent engagement in physical activity, doesn't gain an excessive 150 lbs.
I don't know you or anything about you other than what you've shared here. I would implore you to not only work with a nutritionist but perhaps a therapist as well. The majority of us have (had) an unhealthy relationship with food that has nothing to do with an underlying medical issue, and that warrants examining to some degree. Whatever you decide, I wish great things for you.

You really don't hear what people actually say, do you?
What you were told, by two people who have PCOS - same as you, that they were able to lose weight. PCOS is not an excuse. It's harder, but it can be done. I went swimming every morning for 45 minutes before work, not dog paddling but Olympic size pool laps. Then I hit the gym, with a personal trainer, 5 nights a week. On weekends I literally walked for miles. If you want to lose weight, surgery or not, this is the kind of effort it takes for someone with PCOS. You think it's commendable that you are able to walk. You need to do a heck of a lot more than making it up the steps or the hill to your house to lose weight unless you live on the summit of Mt. Washington and park at the base.
No one said you have no right to be happy or healthy. I've read the thread twice, and there is no such post where you are told this. That's your belief, not what anyone said.
Yes, being almost 300 lbs and 5' 4" is abusing your body. There are thousands of reputable websites that detail what all that excess weight is doing to your body. Everything from increasing your heart attack risk six-fold to wearing out your joints. Even your chances of getting cancer are increased. Would you subject someone you loved to something that would do these things? Nooooo.
Your digestive issues and allergies don't prevent you from eating foods with a lower carb, sugar, fat and calorie content, do they? Never in my life have I seen someone besides you claim that a bagel with butter is a "healthy food choice". bread is not your friend.
For instance, Chickpeas vs Black Beans. You chose chickpeas. 1/2 cup of chickpeas has 269 calories, 4g fat, 45 carbs and 15g of Protein. 1/2 cup of black Beans is 90 calories, 0.5 g fat, 12 carbs and 7g of Protein. You could eat three times as many black beans as chickpeas and still be better off. 45g of carbs for a 1/2 cup serving of anything just will not work if you are trying to lose weight. Your carbs have to be restricted. There isn't anyone who is going to tell you that you can have all the carbs you want and you are going to lose weight. It doesn't work that way. It's like you can't even imagine that there are better choices than the ones you have made.
If you want to lose weight, you will have to change your mindset first, then your habits. You think there is nothing you can learn or be taught because you believe you have a "healthy lifestyle". You don't. Just because you aren't eating a tray of cupcakes at every meal doesn't mean you have made the best choices.
I want to loan you a book, on Kindle. You can use the Kindle app on your phone or computer to read it, you don't need a Kindle. It's by Dr. Duc Vuong. He's the weight loss surgeon that treated TLC's 900 lb man. He wrote a book about Gastric Sleeve Success, and it's great. It explains what you have to change and why, along with explaining the entire sleeve process. If you message me your e-mail address, I'll Kindle lend you the book.

You really don't hear what people actually say, do you?
What you were told, by two people who have PCOS - same as you, that they were able to lose weight. PCOS is not an excuse. It's harder, but it can be done. I went swimming every morning for 45 minutes before work, not dog paddling but Olympic size pool laps. Then I hit the gym, with a personal trainer, 5 nights a week. On weekends I literally walked for miles. If you want to lose weight, surgery or not, this is the kind of effort it takes for someone with PCOS. You think it's commendable that you are able to walk. You need to do a heck of a lot more than making it up the steps or the hill to your house to lose weight unless you live on the summit of Mt. Washington and park at the base.
No one said you have no right to be happy or healthy. I've read the thread twice, and there is no such post where you are told this. That's your belief, not what anyone said.
Yes, being almost 300 lbs and 5' 4" is abusing your body. There are thousands of reputable websites that detail what all that excess weight is doing to your body. Everything from increasing your heart attack risk six-fold to wearing out your joints. Even your chances of getting cancer are increased. Would you subject someone you loved to something that would do these things? Nooooo.
Your digestive issues and allergies don't prevent you from eating foods with a lower carb, sugar, fat and calorie content, do they? Never in my life have I seen someone besides you claim that a bagel with butter is a "healthy food choice". bread is not your friend.
For instance, Chickpeas vs Black Beans. You chose chickpeas. 1/2 cup of chickpeas has 269 calories, 4g fat, 45 carbs and 15g of Protein. 1/2 cup of black Beans is 90 calories, 0.5 g fat, 12 carbs and 7g of Protein. You could eat three times as many black beans as chickpeas and still be better off. 45g of carbs for a 1/2 cup serving of anything just will not work if you are trying to lose weight. Your carbs have to be restricted. There isn't anyone who is going to tell you that you can have all the carbs you want and you are going to lose weight. It doesn't work that way. It's like you can't even imagine that there are better choices than the ones you have made.
If you want to lose weight, you will have to change your mindset first, then your habits. You think there is nothing you can learn or be taught because you believe you have a "healthy lifestyle". You don't. Just because you aren't eating a tray of cupcakes at every meal doesn't mean you have made the best choices.
I want to loan you a book, on Kindle. You can use the Kindle app on your phone or computer to read it, you don't need a Kindle. It's by Dr. Duc Vuong. He's the weight loss surgeon that treated TLC's 900 lb man. He wrote a book about Gastric Sleeve Success, and it's great. It explains what you have to change and why, along with explaining the entire sleeve process. If you message me your e-mail address, I'll Kindle lend you the book.

You do it the same way toddlers do. They have a small stomach, don't eat a lot and stop when they are full. You aren't dieting, it's a complete lifestyle change. You have to learn about nutrition and log every bite that goes in your mouth. The cravings were rough at first, but I got through it. Now I'm not interested in certain foods I used to scarf down.
Seriously? If you had such a "healthy" relationship with your body, you wouldn't weigh close to 300 lbs. What you are is accepting of yourself and the way you look. Not being self-loathing doesn't mean you have a "healthy" relationship with your body. You are living in an abused body. Don't make your husband an excuse. It's extremely rare to find a mentally and emotionally healthy person who goes "ewww" when their partner gets in shape and healthy. What you think you look like in your head right now is not what the rest of the world is seeing. You can save up for plastic surgery. It will be a few years before you lose all the weight, work out to get as much muscle tone and definition as possible and stabilize so you have lots of time.

I'll get real with you too ... and believe me, I'm being realistic, not mean.
PCOS makes it much harder to lose weight, but not impossible. I lost 70 lbs at one point through diet and exercise. It can be done. I went through early menopause so my symptoms are pretty much nonexistent now, but women with PCOS can lose weight. It's harder and slower than the average person, but I did it and I didn't have superpowers. Don't use PCOS as your catch-all excuse. Lots of women with PCOS have the surgery.
I've been a vegetarian for 30+ years and I have to tell you, as far as weight loss and real nutrition, your diet is crap. Bagel with butter? Skipping a meal? Chickpeas (btw, I love them) have 45 carbs in a cup and close to 300 calories. 1/4 cup of feta is loaded with sodium. A cup of quinoa has 39 carbs. Where's the Protein? You think you are eating a lot healthier than you are.
You're not in "great health". You're 5' 4" and almost 300 lbs. You are a morbidly obese woman who is used to walking. Not having a heart attack at this very moment doesn't mean you are in "great health". What you are is someone whose body hasn't started showing the signs of breaking down yet. The key phrase is started showing. It's breaking down. You can walk? Great. We're SUPPOSED to be able to walk without effort. You're not getting the Gold Star of Health because you can still walk and you don't have obesity hypoventilation syndrome ... yet.
I weighed 268 and was 52 when I decided to look into surgery, and I could actually sprint, touch my toes, run up the subway stairs, walk for miles, you name it. I also had a family history of people dying in their 40's and 50's, and if they made it to 60, it wasn't for long. I really didn't want to die. That was the tipping point for me. I was in my genetic "dead zone". I was 53 when I had the surgery, and I'm 54 now. I'm confident I'll live to see 74.
Have you seen any 5' 4" 300 lb women in their 70's and 80's walking around? No. Do you know why that is? It's because there are aren't any. They are all dead.
If you aren't ready for surgery or just plain don't want it, there is nothing wrong with that. It's not for everyone. If you want making it up the stairs to your house to be your personal best, go for it (and I'm not being sarcastic). Sometimes people are happy with the way things are and don't adapt well to change. I had this sort-of uncle who lived in his mother's basement his entire adult life. He had a pool table, a full bar, a dart board, state of the art (for the 1960's) stereo, color tv (a big deal back then), fridge, some type of velour sofa and a bed. The only time he would leave was to buy beer and Slim Jims. He was truly happy. His whole life was spent in that basement. He loved being down there until the day he died.
I personally am so grateful for my surgery. Every day I wake up and think about what I was this time last year. I ate clean before, but now proper nutrition is a priority. So is exercise and making the best possible choices for me at all times. What I put in my mouth, what I do with my time, what I will accept from myself. My personal standards for myself and my goals are a thousand times higher and it really shows.
Is there something you are afraid of? There are some downsides (like sagging skin), but it's small potatoes compared to all the health and personal benefits. I don't pray to not die in my sleep every night before I go to bed any more. I'm not jonesing for Bagels any more. I get excited about working out. When stuff happens, I have to deal with it instead of eat. The happy switch has been turned on for me. I wish I had done this years ago.

I have had obstructive sleep apnea my entire life and can tell you why it's a problem.
The reason why they want you on a cpap before and after surgery is because the low blood oxygen levels you get from not breathing increases your risk of a heart attack greatly after surgery. You don't want to go in for a sleeve and come out with a sleeve and a pacemaker. Anesthesia also relaxes your muscles, and people with an obstructive apnea have enough of a relaxed airway as it is. Obstructive apnea increases your possible complication rate, but untreated obstructive apnea puts you in the high-risk zone.
FYI, the dry mouth is usually caused by snoring. Snoring can also make you thirsty.
And the nighttime urination isn't really what they are asking you about. People with apnea normally don't remember waking up during an event, but they WILL remember waking up and going to the bathroom. Since people with apnea wake up a lot during the night, a large number of them are roused enough to the point where they think they have to go to the bathroom, so that's where they go. The question is used as a marker. It doesn't apply to everyone who has apnea (I hardly ever get up to go unless I drank 32 ounces 15 minutes before bed or something), but it can be a marker for a lot of people.

My hair loss stopped at 5 1/2 months, which was good because I was going to look like Captain Picard if it kept up much longer.
I got a shoulder length layered cut to make it look as best I could for now. I can get away with wearing a winter hat for the next few months, so that will help some too while it grows back in.

I'll get real with you too ... and believe me, I'm being realistic, not mean.
PCOS makes it much harder to lose weight, but not impossible. I lost 70 lbs at one point through diet and exercise. It can be done. I went through early menopause so my symptoms are pretty much nonexistent now, but women with PCOS can lose weight. It's harder and slower than the average person, but I did it and I didn't have superpowers. Don't use PCOS as your catch-all excuse. Lots of women with PCOS have the surgery.
I've been a vegetarian for 30+ years and I have to tell you, as far as weight loss and real nutrition, your diet is crap. Bagel with butter? Skipping a meal? Chickpeas (btw, I love them) have 45 carbs in a cup and close to 300 calories. 1/4 cup of feta is loaded with sodium. A cup of quinoa has 39 carbs. Where's the Protein? You think you are eating a lot healthier than you are.
You're not in "great health". You're 5' 4" and almost 300 lbs. You are a morbidly obese woman who is used to walking. Not having a heart attack at this very moment doesn't mean you are in "great health". What you are is someone whose body hasn't started showing the signs of breaking down yet. The key phrase is started showing. It's breaking down. You can walk? Great. We're SUPPOSED to be able to walk without effort. You're not getting the Gold Star of Health because you can still walk and you don't have obesity hypoventilation syndrome ... yet.
I weighed 268 and was 52 when I decided to look into surgery, and I could actually sprint, touch my toes, run up the subway stairs, walk for miles, you name it. I also had a family history of people dying in their 40's and 50's, and if they made it to 60, it wasn't for long. I really didn't want to die. That was the tipping point for me. I was in my genetic "dead zone". I was 53 when I had the surgery, and I'm 54 now. I'm confident I'll live to see 74.
Have you seen any 5' 4" 300 lb women in their 70's and 80's walking around? No. Do you know why that is? It's because there are aren't any. They are all dead.
If you aren't ready for surgery or just plain don't want it, there is nothing wrong with that. It's not for everyone. If you want making it up the stairs to your house to be your personal best, go for it (and I'm not being sarcastic). Sometimes people are happy with the way things are and don't adapt well to change. I had this sort-of uncle who lived in his mother's basement his entire adult life. He had a pool table, a full bar, a dart board, state of the art (for the 1960's) stereo, color tv (a big deal back then), fridge, some type of velour sofa and a bed. The only time he would leave was to buy beer and Slim Jims. He was truly happy. His whole life was spent in that basement. He loved being down there until the day he died.
I personally am so grateful for my surgery. Every day I wake up and think about what I was this time last year. I ate clean before, but now proper nutrition is a priority. So is exercise and making the best possible choices for me at all times. What I put in my mouth, what I do with my time, what I will accept from myself. My personal standards for myself and my goals are a thousand times higher and it really shows.
Is there something you are afraid of? There are some downsides (like sagging skin), but it's small potatoes compared to all the health and personal benefits. I don't pray to not die in my sleep every night before I go to bed any more. I'm not jonesing for Bagels any more. I get excited about working out. When stuff happens, I have to deal with it instead of eat. The happy switch has been turned on for me. I wish I had done this years ago.

You really don't hear what people actually say, do you?
What you were told, by two people who have PCOS - same as you, that they were able to lose weight. PCOS is not an excuse. It's harder, but it can be done. I went swimming every morning for 45 minutes before work, not dog paddling but Olympic size pool laps. Then I hit the gym, with a personal trainer, 5 nights a week. On weekends I literally walked for miles. If you want to lose weight, surgery or not, this is the kind of effort it takes for someone with PCOS. You think it's commendable that you are able to walk. You need to do a heck of a lot more than making it up the steps or the hill to your house to lose weight unless you live on the summit of Mt. Washington and park at the base.
No one said you have no right to be happy or healthy. I've read the thread twice, and there is no such post where you are told this. That's your belief, not what anyone said.
Yes, being almost 300 lbs and 5' 4" is abusing your body. There are thousands of reputable websites that detail what all that excess weight is doing to your body. Everything from increasing your heart attack risk six-fold to wearing out your joints. Even your chances of getting cancer are increased. Would you subject someone you loved to something that would do these things? Nooooo.
Your digestive issues and allergies don't prevent you from eating foods with a lower carb, sugar, fat and calorie content, do they? Never in my life have I seen someone besides you claim that a bagel with butter is a "healthy food choice". bread is not your friend.
For instance, Chickpeas vs Black Beans. You chose chickpeas. 1/2 cup of chickpeas has 269 calories, 4g fat, 45 carbs and 15g of Protein. 1/2 cup of black Beans is 90 calories, 0.5 g fat, 12 carbs and 7g of Protein. You could eat three times as many black beans as chickpeas and still be better off. 45g of carbs for a 1/2 cup serving of anything just will not work if you are trying to lose weight. Your carbs have to be restricted. There isn't anyone who is going to tell you that you can have all the carbs you want and you are going to lose weight. It doesn't work that way. It's like you can't even imagine that there are better choices than the ones you have made.
If you want to lose weight, you will have to change your mindset first, then your habits. You think there is nothing you can learn or be taught because you believe you have a "healthy lifestyle". You don't. Just because you aren't eating a tray of cupcakes at every meal doesn't mean you have made the best choices.
I want to loan you a book, on Kindle. You can use the Kindle app on your phone or computer to read it, you don't need a Kindle. It's by Dr. Duc Vuong. He's the weight loss surgeon that treated TLC's 900 lb man. He wrote a book about Gastric Sleeve Success, and it's great. It explains what you have to change and why, along with explaining the entire sleeve process. If you message me your e-mail address, I'll Kindle lend you the book.

It was really hard, but I did it.
FYI, there were no video games in the 1960's and nowhere in my post did I mention cigarettes. What I was pointing out was that he was perfectly happy with a situation that most people would have been clawing their way out of. He had no desire to change or make things what most people would consider better for himself. He was just fine with the way things are. Maybe you are too. You don't have to have surgery if you don't want to .... just don't fool yourself about what your situation really is.
Whether you think so or not, you aren't eating for optimal nutrition and weight loss. Do you know how much sugar is in sundried tomatoes? How much sodium? For you to get in the proper amount of Protein with all those ingredients, your salad would have had to have been MUCH larger than you stated, and the calories would have been pretty high.
Skipping meals causes weight gain. For one, it slows down your metabolism. I could go on and on. You're just not eating the way you need to. If you want to have surgery, you are going to have to take a crash course in nutrition and really grasp what you are putting in your mouth.

You do it the same way toddlers do. They have a small stomach, don't eat a lot and stop when they are full. You aren't dieting, it's a complete lifestyle change. You have to learn about nutrition and log every bite that goes in your mouth. The cravings were rough at first, but I got through it. Now I'm not interested in certain foods I used to scarf down.
Seriously? If you had such a "healthy" relationship with your body, you wouldn't weigh close to 300 lbs. What you are is accepting of yourself and the way you look. Not being self-loathing doesn't mean you have a "healthy" relationship with your body. You are living in an abused body. Don't make your husband an excuse. It's extremely rare to find a mentally and emotionally healthy person who goes "ewww" when their partner gets in shape and healthy. What you think you look like in your head right now is not what the rest of the world is seeing. You can save up for plastic surgery. It will be a few years before you lose all the weight, work out to get as much muscle tone and definition as possible and stabilize so you have lots of time.

I'll get real with you too ... and believe me, I'm being realistic, not mean.
PCOS makes it much harder to lose weight, but not impossible. I lost 70 lbs at one point through diet and exercise. It can be done. I went through early menopause so my symptoms are pretty much nonexistent now, but women with PCOS can lose weight. It's harder and slower than the average person, but I did it and I didn't have superpowers. Don't use PCOS as your catch-all excuse. Lots of women with PCOS have the surgery.
I've been a vegetarian for 30+ years and I have to tell you, as far as weight loss and real nutrition, your diet is crap. Bagel with butter? Skipping a meal? Chickpeas (btw, I love them) have 45 carbs in a cup and close to 300 calories. 1/4 cup of feta is loaded with sodium. A cup of quinoa has 39 carbs. Where's the Protein? You think you are eating a lot healthier than you are.
You're not in "great health". You're 5' 4" and almost 300 lbs. You are a morbidly obese woman who is used to walking. Not having a heart attack at this very moment doesn't mean you are in "great health". What you are is someone whose body hasn't started showing the signs of breaking down yet. The key phrase is started showing. It's breaking down. You can walk? Great. We're SUPPOSED to be able to walk without effort. You're not getting the Gold Star of Health because you can still walk and you don't have obesity hypoventilation syndrome ... yet.
I weighed 268 and was 52 when I decided to look into surgery, and I could actually sprint, touch my toes, run up the subway stairs, walk for miles, you name it. I also had a family history of people dying in their 40's and 50's, and if they made it to 60, it wasn't for long. I really didn't want to die. That was the tipping point for me. I was in my genetic "dead zone". I was 53 when I had the surgery, and I'm 54 now. I'm confident I'll live to see 74.
Have you seen any 5' 4" 300 lb women in their 70's and 80's walking around? No. Do you know why that is? It's because there are aren't any. They are all dead.
If you aren't ready for surgery or just plain don't want it, there is nothing wrong with that. It's not for everyone. If you want making it up the stairs to your house to be your personal best, go for it (and I'm not being sarcastic). Sometimes people are happy with the way things are and don't adapt well to change. I had this sort-of uncle who lived in his mother's basement his entire adult life. He had a pool table, a full bar, a dart board, state of the art (for the 1960's) stereo, color tv (a big deal back then), fridge, some type of velour sofa and a bed. The only time he would leave was to buy beer and Slim Jims. He was truly happy. His whole life was spent in that basement. He loved being down there until the day he died.
I personally am so grateful for my surgery. Every day I wake up and think about what I was this time last year. I ate clean before, but now proper nutrition is a priority. So is exercise and making the best possible choices for me at all times. What I put in my mouth, what I do with my time, what I will accept from myself. My personal standards for myself and my goals are a thousand times higher and it really shows.
Is there something you are afraid of? There are some downsides (like sagging skin), but it's small potatoes compared to all the health and personal benefits. I don't pray to not die in my sleep every night before I go to bed any more. I'm not jonesing for Bagels any more. I get excited about working out. When stuff happens, I have to deal with it instead of eat. The happy switch has been turned on for me. I wish I had done this years ago.

I'll get real with you too ... and believe me, I'm being realistic, not mean.
PCOS makes it much harder to lose weight, but not impossible. I lost 70 lbs at one point through diet and exercise. It can be done. I went through early menopause so my symptoms are pretty much nonexistent now, but women with PCOS can lose weight. It's harder and slower than the average person, but I did it and I didn't have superpowers. Don't use PCOS as your catch-all excuse. Lots of women with PCOS have the surgery.
I've been a vegetarian for 30+ years and I have to tell you, as far as weight loss and real nutrition, your diet is crap. Bagel with butter? Skipping a meal? Chickpeas (btw, I love them) have 45 carbs in a cup and close to 300 calories. 1/4 cup of feta is loaded with sodium. A cup of quinoa has 39 carbs. Where's the Protein? You think you are eating a lot healthier than you are.
You're not in "great health". You're 5' 4" and almost 300 lbs. You are a morbidly obese woman who is used to walking. Not having a heart attack at this very moment doesn't mean you are in "great health". What you are is someone whose body hasn't started showing the signs of breaking down yet. The key phrase is started showing. It's breaking down. You can walk? Great. We're SUPPOSED to be able to walk without effort. You're not getting the Gold Star of Health because you can still walk and you don't have obesity hypoventilation syndrome ... yet.
I weighed 268 and was 52 when I decided to look into surgery, and I could actually sprint, touch my toes, run up the subway stairs, walk for miles, you name it. I also had a family history of people dying in their 40's and 50's, and if they made it to 60, it wasn't for long. I really didn't want to die. That was the tipping point for me. I was in my genetic "dead zone". I was 53 when I had the surgery, and I'm 54 now. I'm confident I'll live to see 74.
Have you seen any 5' 4" 300 lb women in their 70's and 80's walking around? No. Do you know why that is? It's because there are aren't any. They are all dead.
If you aren't ready for surgery or just plain don't want it, there is nothing wrong with that. It's not for everyone. If you want making it up the stairs to your house to be your personal best, go for it (and I'm not being sarcastic). Sometimes people are happy with the way things are and don't adapt well to change. I had this sort-of uncle who lived in his mother's basement his entire adult life. He had a pool table, a full bar, a dart board, state of the art (for the 1960's) stereo, color tv (a big deal back then), fridge, some type of velour sofa and a bed. The only time he would leave was to buy beer and Slim Jims. He was truly happy. His whole life was spent in that basement. He loved being down there until the day he died.
I personally am so grateful for my surgery. Every day I wake up and think about what I was this time last year. I ate clean before, but now proper nutrition is a priority. So is exercise and making the best possible choices for me at all times. What I put in my mouth, what I do with my time, what I will accept from myself. My personal standards for myself and my goals are a thousand times higher and it really shows.
Is there something you are afraid of? There are some downsides (like sagging skin), but it's small potatoes compared to all the health and personal benefits. I don't pray to not die in my sleep every night before I go to bed any more. I'm not jonesing for Bagels any more. I get excited about working out. When stuff happens, I have to deal with it instead of eat. The happy switch has been turned on for me. I wish I had done this years ago.

I'll get real with you too ... and believe me, I'm being realistic, not mean.
PCOS makes it much harder to lose weight, but not impossible. I lost 70 lbs at one point through diet and exercise. It can be done. I went through early menopause so my symptoms are pretty much nonexistent now, but women with PCOS can lose weight. It's harder and slower than the average person, but I did it and I didn't have superpowers. Don't use PCOS as your catch-all excuse. Lots of women with PCOS have the surgery.
I've been a vegetarian for 30+ years and I have to tell you, as far as weight loss and real nutrition, your diet is crap. Bagel with butter? Skipping a meal? Chickpeas (btw, I love them) have 45 carbs in a cup and close to 300 calories. 1/4 cup of feta is loaded with sodium. A cup of quinoa has 39 carbs. Where's the Protein? You think you are eating a lot healthier than you are.
You're not in "great health". You're 5' 4" and almost 300 lbs. You are a morbidly obese woman who is used to walking. Not having a heart attack at this very moment doesn't mean you are in "great health". What you are is someone whose body hasn't started showing the signs of breaking down yet. The key phrase is started showing. It's breaking down. You can walk? Great. We're SUPPOSED to be able to walk without effort. You're not getting the Gold Star of Health because you can still walk and you don't have obesity hypoventilation syndrome ... yet.
I weighed 268 and was 52 when I decided to look into surgery, and I could actually sprint, touch my toes, run up the subway stairs, walk for miles, you name it. I also had a family history of people dying in their 40's and 50's, and if they made it to 60, it wasn't for long. I really didn't want to die. That was the tipping point for me. I was in my genetic "dead zone". I was 53 when I had the surgery, and I'm 54 now. I'm confident I'll live to see 74.
Have you seen any 5' 4" 300 lb women in their 70's and 80's walking around? No. Do you know why that is? It's because there are aren't any. They are all dead.
If you aren't ready for surgery or just plain don't want it, there is nothing wrong with that. It's not for everyone. If you want making it up the stairs to your house to be your personal best, go for it (and I'm not being sarcastic). Sometimes people are happy with the way things are and don't adapt well to change. I had this sort-of uncle who lived in his mother's basement his entire adult life. He had a pool table, a full bar, a dart board, state of the art (for the 1960's) stereo, color tv (a big deal back then), fridge, some type of velour sofa and a bed. The only time he would leave was to buy beer and Slim Jims. He was truly happy. His whole life was spent in that basement. He loved being down there until the day he died.
I personally am so grateful for my surgery. Every day I wake up and think about what I was this time last year. I ate clean before, but now proper nutrition is a priority. So is exercise and making the best possible choices for me at all times. What I put in my mouth, what I do with my time, what I will accept from myself. My personal standards for myself and my goals are a thousand times higher and it really shows.
Is there something you are afraid of? There are some downsides (like sagging skin), but it's small potatoes compared to all the health and personal benefits. I don't pray to not die in my sleep every night before I go to bed any more. I'm not jonesing for Bagels any more. I get excited about working out. When stuff happens, I have to deal with it instead of eat. The happy switch has been turned on for me. I wish I had done this years ago.

It will break.
I had a six week stall that broke a few weeks ago.