gowalking

I picked up a prescription last night and the pharmacist came around the counter and while I was paying for my meds, mentioned to me that she noticed a significant weight loss and asked if I was losing weight as part of a healthy lifestyle or if I was ill. I was a little surprised at her directness but realized as a pharmacist, she was just getting to point of her observation and not thinking about how it sounded. For whatever reason, this was a first for me...having a 'medical professional' question my weight loss who wasn't directly seeing me as a patient. I wonder just how many other folks I interact with are thinking the same thing but not saying anything as they know it's not acceptable to question something considered so personal. Maybe I need to have a tee shirt made up that says, 'I'm fine, thank you very much'.

Echoing what others are saying. Haven't had a Protein drink since I started mushies. I've lost more than 150 lbs. on dense protein, veggies and yes...small amounts of carbs.

It took me a while to figure out what was flattering yet age appropriate. I remember very well, a young woman who I asked in the dressing room, what she thought of a dress I had on. She wanted to know why I was so covered up with such a small pretty shape. Again...we do not often see what others see. Bring someone you trust with you to shop. Or spend a little more and go to a store with real salespeople like Lord & Taylor or Nordstrom who can help you pick out clothes.

It's starting to warm up here in NYC as well Julie. About time I say. Here's the nice thing about the change of seasons....a good reason to change out the wardrobe and pick up a few new items...

I had to start seeing a therapist because I didn't recognize the person I saw in the mirror. This was a combination of body dis-morphia and loss of control...two hot button issues for me. I'm getting better at recognizing myself but it's still a process. I've also segued into issues surrounding the root causes of my obesity and how I can work on staying the size I am now. I fear self sabotage and I know that it's easy to eat around the band if that is your goal. Not to worry @CanyonBaby....you are absolutely not alone in the things you feel and think when you look in the mirror.

What great responses. And I agree that if weighing daily is what helps, then do it. I just meant that we should enjoy the successes along the way rather than just focusing on the end goal only. Every day there is something to appreciate even if we've stalled or gained some weight back and that's what I hope people take from my post. We should enjoy the improvements we see whenever we notice them. Whether we are 5 lbs. from goal, or 105 lbs. from goal. For me, the amount of weight I've lost has meaning..not necessarily what I weigh. I lost 150 lbs. and in the process, gained my life back. For this I am so very grateful and I wanted to remind folks who may be struggling to know that there are several measures of success, not just a number on the scale. Thanks again everyone!

I'm starting to see more posts from folks with stalls, or gaining some weight back, or I'm 'X' pounds away from goal and I want to kindly remind everyone that weight is a number. It's the way the medical community determines success/failure with weight loss surgery. It should not be our way of determining success or failure. Stop getting on the scale. Focus on the non scale victories. We have them daily. You just have to be aware of them. Even with myself being in the maintenance stage, I still have NSVs. I just am not always aware of them and then when I am, it's as good as the first NSV. I've been on this forum for more than two years. I provide my stats just so other morbidly obese folks can see that WLS works. No other reason. I don't weigh myself anymore. I know by what I've eaten, how I'm doing. I know by the fit of my clothes, how I'm doing. I know I'm successful because I can walk again when I was almost wheelchair bound. I know I'm successful because I am healthier than I've been in almost 20 years. I know I'm successful because I look people in the eye again. I know I'm successful because I care about how I look again. I know I'm successful because I am actually out there dating again. I know I'm successful because I can take trips with my family and not be a burden. I know I'm successful because I can put my leg up on the bench in the shower and shave my legs again. I know I'm successful because I can sit in a chair with arms. Shall I go on? Do you get it now? As the weight drops...quickly or slowly or in a non-linear fashion, we experience all types of NSVs. Focus on those. Enjoy your lives, you are making choices to be better. Even if you falter, you can get back on track. You have the tools so know that every day is a new beginning and today is the day to pay attention to how much healthier/happier you are now than before. Have a good day today and be kind to yourselves. I'm heading out in a couple of hours to see my new grandson born this past Thursday. I can get on the train with no problems, climb the stairs at the train station without worrying if I'll make it or not, not worry about how big the hospital is because I can walk without pain, and hold the baby in my arms and know that I will be the most active grandma this kid will ever know. Come look for me....I'll be the little lady in the park climbing the monkey bars with her grandson in a few years. That my friends, is success.

@@ThruChristICan, it's not a battle but a choice. Do your homework, talk to your medical professional about your situation, and what you are most comfortable with, and then make the choice that is best for you. The most important decision you made was to look at the option of WLS, whichever one you decide on. Good luck.

The prices are really high at the Midtown store. I went to the Talbots outlet in Deer Park on the Island and the prices there are much more reasonable. You should check it out if you can get out there.

Believe me...it will make your head spin once you get into regular sizes. I was there last week taking advantage of the one day sale and spent five hours trying on stuff. I'm still not sure what size I am...plus I have to learn that size is secondary. I can be anywhere from a size 10 to a 4 in a dress, and an 8 to a 4 in slacks. So when I see something I like, I often have to try it on in a couple of sizes to see what fits better. Guess what happened yesterday. I was in Talbot's on Madison Ave. and meandered on to the third floor. This was the only floor where the lady asked me if I was looking for something for myself. I said yes and she told me I was on the plus size floor and needed to go up to the fourth floor where the petite's were. She knew just based on my size, that I was on the wrong floor unless I was purchasing something for someone else. I wanted to run up to her and plant a big ole kiss on her..

chances are pretty good that you will put some of it back on. best advice I can give you, is don't get on the scale for a while. focus on healing, learning how to navigate with the band, and generally stay away from anything that might sabotage your commitment. Good luck and welcome to the forum.

I don't get stuck but I do know that when I eat out, I don't always pay attention to the amount of food I eat and with the band, sometimes one forkful can mean the difference between satiety and uncomfortably full. So I figured out a little trick. I take off a band sized portion of whatever I'm eating, cut that food into small pieces and when I've finished it, I'm finished. I don't graze anything else on my plate, or start to nibble on the bread...nothing. This way I don't have to focus on the food but I also know I've done my best to prevent anything untoward.

I do lots of shopping as well. I used to buy too much because I still had the 'if it fits, get it in every color' mentality. Then I bought too much because I was so excited to go into smaller sizes. Finally, I'm starting to realize that I can shop anywhere..not just in 'women's' sections so I can be much more discerning now so I try to only buy what I love. I'm getting there, but thank goodness I live alone because my closets are ready to explode. Oh..and along with the new clothes, are lots of new shoes, bags and purses, and fashion jewelry. Thank goodness my food bill is so much less money..

I always liked hummus but now it's a staple of my diet. Three ounces along with a 100 calorie wrap and I'm good for lunch or even breakfast. Quick and easy.

I also hide the wrinkled skin but I don't want to be celibate so I'm going out on a limb and meeting men online and going out on dates with some of them. I'm not yet intimate with anyone but I know it will happen at some point. I'm just betting on what I've seen so far, which is that a man who thinks he might be lucky enough to get a little something something, isn't thinking about the excess skin as much as he's thinking about scoring. At least that's been my experience so far.

Thanks for the input everyone. I appreciate all the comments. @@AvaFern, you are indeed correct. As one gets smaller, the port become more obvious. I can hide it under most clothing but it's obvious when I'm naked. It looks like a golf ball under my skin and that's why I know between that and the excess skin, there's no way I can hide it from someone I may be intimate with. As far as his weight, I don't think he's obsessive about it...I think he's scared that I might be judgmental. Having been morbidly obese myself, who am I to judge?. All I wanted to do was reassure him that looks is not a priority for me though I can see after being on the dating sites for a year, men are attracted to an attractive woman. Doesn't mean they are looking for young chippies, but they are looking for someone who catches their eye. I've gotten many messages from men who tell me how pretty I am. I say thank you and then move on. I'm not so comfortable with being told this at the moment though I am working on the mental aspect of this weight loss journey with a therapist. That though is for another thread..

Thank you for sharing your pictures. Everytime I think I'm OK with my body the way it is, I see how much better it can look and I think all over again that I should go for it. I just hate the idea of more surgery. Maybe in time I'll want it more than dreading how it has to be done.

I'm actively dating but have not 'clicked' with anyone yet. So I think of myself as still window shopping and checking out the merchandise. I've been talking with one man in particular and we've made a connection over the phone. We plan to meet later this coming week. He's told me a couple of times that he's not exactly fit. I can tell that he is concerned because I'm slim and he's not. I have no intention of letting him know I'm banded...not at this early stage. But I wanted him to know that excess pounds are not an issue for me. So I told him I wasn't always as thin as I am now and extra pounds is no concern for me. Problem is...it feels like a sin of omission. I tried to let him know that attraction for me is all about making a connection...feeling comfortable talking, having things in common, similar interests, laughing at the same things, etc. I don't like to lie but I also don't feel that everything should be out there right away. I wouldn't tell a woman friend I had just met that I was banded so why tell a man who I may be interested in such a personal piece of info either. The question for me is when do I tell him? Some men I went out with did eventually know of my WLS and it had nothing to do with becoming physical. It just seemed like the right time to bring it up based on the discussions we were having. I have no idea if any of these relationships were potentially impacted because of this or not. I don't think so...but who knows. Besides...if being banded is a problem for some men, better I should know sooner than later. I just find it hard to know when to talk about it. Or maybe I should just do what I've been doing. Tell when it seems the right time to do so...or keep it to myself because I don't think it's the right time. I'm just concerned about this particular man...because it's obvious he's worried about what I will think of his body and since men are so much more visual than women, he doesn't realize that it's a non-issue for me. Amazing that I can be cool, calm and collected in all facets of my life except in the dating world. When it comes to men, I revert back to a scared 16 year old again even if it's in a 56 year old somewhat scarred and wrinkled body.

Do your research and pick what you are most comfortable with. Most people who get banded do so because it's not permanent. All I can tell you is that you shouldn't rely on opinions on this or any other forum. You have to decide and the best way to do that is to know as much as possible about whichever weight loss surgery you are considering. Good luck with whatever you decide.

I'd like to see just before surgery and then after. I'm so wrinkled under my clothes and think about surgery all the time. I just don't know if I want to deal with all the post op pain and related concerns. But I'd sure like a flat stomach for the first time in my life. Maybe pics will convince me to move forward.

Same here Julie. I worry all the time that suddenly I'll have issues. Hoping just like you that those with no issues are just not posting. I know that Alex is doing just fine and he is banded ten years.

I have what is often called a 'pot belly'. But with the right undergarments, you can't really see anything anymore. Not after losing more than 150 lbs. I've got alot of loose skin but no fat. I'll need plastic surgery to flatten my stomach but I'm not ready to do it yet...if ever.

I went out a couple of times with a guy I met online who had the band. And there is a coworker of mine who was very heavy and he's probably half his size now. I heard he had WLS. I'm pretty sure that most of the folks in my office are presuming I had surgery as well even though I only told a few of my closer friends here. When you are truly obese and lose so much weight that you are virtually unrecognizable, people will make that assumption. No one has asked me directly except one person and I did not lie..I admitted I had surgery. If she told others, so be it. No one in my family has had WLS though I wish my sister would do it. She's morbidly obese and I worry for her health. I don't care what she looks like, but I want her around as long as possible and I know her co-morbidities can impact her life.

I'm one of those rare birds who has restriction without fills. I'm not the only one, but it's very atypical. It's also a double edged sword in that I can eat anything but I have to be careful because I can eat anything.

Thank you sweetheart!!