DeLarla

I'd invite tons of people if it were my place! We got invited though. I think Penni and Darcy can handle it, but don't boot me off the boards or talk smack about me when I'm gone, cuz I WILL find out. Much amore, Lis.

I used to have a gay roommate when I lived in Southern California. The word "fart" horrified him and sent him into a coma since he had never farted in his entire life. I think he finally let one loose in 1994 in his bedroom, which was the epicenter of the Northridge Earthquake. Certain things simply must be set free. What more can I say?

I often have my friend's 5 year old at the house. She learned a new one from her stinky older brothers. Every time she farts, she says, "ADD THAT TO YOUR SALAD."

I just clicked on something and got a message saying I unsubsribed to this thread. I don't even know how to unsubscribe to a thread? Beuhler, Beuhler, Anyone....???

I've never been to La Roca. There will be quad runners, fishing poles, metal detectors and booze. I'm in a funky, funky place, so this trip will either make me or break me. I think I'm suffering band anxiety (the latest in mental disorders.) Today crackers and 1/2 large candy bar for breakfast. I've never eaten breakfast before cuz have always been too tight. What's going on here?

I'm bringing water, Vodka and Bailys. How's that?

Last time I was in TJ for my port removal, the local freaks tried to get me upstairs to see the Naked Lady and Donkey show. I sure hope the were just feeding them peanuts or dog biscuits! And too late to be concerned with dieting or my band. Things aren't going so well in that department the past couple days. I'm in need of a new port and fill, SOON.

Chris and I got invited to Mexico, but this time no doctors! We're leaving Wednesday and returning Sunday. If you guys don't see me by Sunday, please send help! It's a place called La Roca, south of San Felipe. They have land on the beach with 2 trailers - sounds like fun. I'll miss you guys! Lis

Now that I think about it, I find myself much more gassy after having protein shakes. Does this ring a bell (or a pook-pook) to anyone?

Penni, SHUT UP! I wonder if we laugh too much, thereby sucking too much air in our guts? I wasn't able to burp pre-band. Now I burp once a week - one really long burp. But this farting thing has gotta stop. It's to the point where I'm sick of being embarrassed, so I'm just letting them rip. At least I can blame them on Chris. I owe him big time. A long time ago we were walking down a hallway in a casino, and he ripped a big fart just as another couple turned the corner right by us. He looked at me with a scolding voice and blamed me for his fart. So the people thought it was me. Men! But payback's a bitch, ain't it? I wonder what the non-farters eat compared to the farters. I'm a farter, and I try to get veggies in twice a day. Anyone else?

Nice to see you, Anne. I don't have anything to say for a change. Can you believe that?

I wonder what Michelle wonders... did the doctor fill you? The foam coming up sounds like a PB. And I agree with Rebecca to try warm liquids if ice chips don't help. Use a small teaspoon and just take a couple bites. But get to the doctor if you don't keep liquids down because they'll give you an IV to prevent dehydration. One of the girls that had surgery with me ended up getting an IV because she got really sick from dehydration. Call your band surgeon and let him know. But you sound kinda normal since some people get more swollen during surgery than others. It will pass. Be good to yourself, and welcome both of you to Fartland USA! Much luck and love. xox

I fight to find open spaces (like the State of Wyoming). That needed to be repeated! Just call me Farti Pants. And I can roll out a good burp now whereas prior to surgery I couldn't burp at all. I'm quite proud of my new burping abilties, but I think I'm even offending my Pipefitter husband with the farts, and that's not easy to do! I was recently moved into an office with a patio door. They said it was to make room for a new employee, but now I wonder if they're sending me a hint! I better open the door!

This post made me happy. Good for you!

I went to a seminar on Band vs Bypass. There are certain foods bypass patients must avoid for ever or else they'll "dump." For example, most can't eat chocolate or they "dump." Dumping is to bypass patients what PB-ing is to us. They eat something that their body rejects because it's unable to process it, so they dump (get really sick and spend a lot of time in the bathroom losing the food either by mouth or bottom.) Dumping sounds extremely horrible. Bypass patients lose weight really fast for three reasons: 1. They have a tiny capacity new stomach. 2. The intestines are re-wired so food goes straight through; 3. They get physically ill from foods their body rejects. They physically can't eat certain foods without dumping, while banded people can eat just about anything within reason. However, bypass patients can slowly train their bodies to accept foods that were once forbidden. My friend had a bypass 10 years ago and gained nearly all her weight back by training herself to eat. She ate all day long, little nibbles, of all goodies that used to make her dump. She introduced them slowly. The same is true for the band though. If we allow ourselves small amounts of goodies all day long, we'll eventually gain weight back without damaging the band. Did that make any sense at all?

Glad to see you came home with your new band. It's like bringing home a baby that needs special care and love. Take care of your band, and your band will take care of you. I'm glad you're back. Great luck to you!

Penni, isn't it fun when the plateau cracks in half? Seeing five pounds gone at once is awesome! Great job walking. I don't know about any December dates - there's no way I can plan that far in advance, but Greg said he's gonna be here. I figured me & Chris could meet him for dinner.

Michelle, you're so consistent with the loss - you and Betty are kicking butt! I'm up one pound, but my weekend was worth it! And the big seven-zoro for Rebeccalee, awesome! Greg, see you next month! Maybe we'll get Penni & John out here, too.

My neighbor got jealous and bought a motorcycle so he could join us. Now he blames it all on me for getting him hooked. Oops. So Chris, CJ and I went out to dinner, then cruised the Strip on our bikes. And the biggest NSV in the world... I GOT FLIRTED WITH BY A WHOLE CAR OF GUYS! I was at a red light alone on my bike (CJ & Chris yapping a few yards behind me) and a taxi full of young cuties were asking me to rev my engine for them! Chris noticed I was getting flirted with and zoomed up to ruin my fun. Jeolous husband is a fun NSV! Then we picked up Chloe, and she snuggled in the recliner with me eating junk food and watching a scary movie. She spent the night and is still sleeping, and she's helping me take Sachi and Milo to the vet for shots. The rest of the weekend is up in the air, but it's gonna involve motorcycles and spending money we don't have. Next weekend Chris and I, along with friends, Darren & Tina, are going on a road trip to California. Chris & Darren are riding their motorcycles.... AND THIS JUST IN... Penni, Chris is finishing the trailor so I can bring my bike on the back of my truck. We'll park the trailer in Lance's culdesac (I hope.) I'm tired of figuring stuff out so I'm leaving it up to Chris.

Zoe, I can't imagine my mother telling me I look good. That's the best NSV yet!

Jodie, I'm cheering you on here for keeping such a great attitude and walking off that anger instead of giving in to temptation. I'm glad you're not letting this ugly battle get the better of you. Keep it up! Congrads on the great loss, too.

The last thing Vegas needs is a new buffet, but they just opened a new Brazilian one up. The picture of roasted steak has been passed around on flyers long enough, so I broke down and went. GOOD NEWS! THE PLACE SUCKS! Whew, don't gotta worry no more! I'm bored & needed a new thread. What's everyone doing this weekend?

If it's too thick, thin it down with some ice, milk or water. You've got to get liquids down though.

Thanks Bec! Portless in Las Vegas!

Fun thread. Today I touched my toes without bending my knees. It burned, but I did it! I have't even seen my toes in over a decade!