whitneymalae

So yesterday I had my very first date post-op. I had met him online and was very nervous =) I had decided to tell him about my VSG before meeting him, so that was thankfully something he already knew about.
 
It went really well, one of the better first dates I've had. I am a pretty shy person, but I tried to open up more. He is very cute and though I figured we'd only spend a couple hours together it turned into like an 8 hour date. We had lunch, walked around shops, played mini-golf, played arcade games, and went to a movie. I think he had a good time too, or at least I assume he did since he kept suggesting that we could keep hanging out after lunch. I'm gonna give it a few days or so and then I think if he hasn't mentioned it maybe I will bring up a second date. After all, I don't wanna make him have to do all the work. I'm reservedly excited though!
 
I actually felt like I looked great. I should have worn a coat that was a little bigger because the zip hoodie I wore was almost there but not quite.
 
So on to my progress: I have now lost 53.4 pounds! It's really pretty incredible to see that number. I haven't seen below 280 in like 4 years and now I'm at 271.6! I can't believe it most days. I still can't see it in the mirror, but I can see it in pictures now!! I need to get back on track with my protein though - I haven't been logging my food lately and I don't want to fall into bad habits. I want to continue to lose and the only way I can make this long term is if I self-correct when I make mistakes or get off track. Plus, I haven't been working out as much. This week my goal is to work out Tues-Sun. I would work out today but I have to head off to work shortly.
 
I am like 15 pounds away from being able to fit into my Threadless t-shirts! I am sooooo excited about that. I collect t-shirts and have like 40+ that I will be able to wear very soon. And pants! I wore my 24s to the date yesterday and I think they looked great. 22s are still pretty far away, but I am gonna be sooooo stoked when I can fit into them! It will be simply incredible.
 
October is usually the worst month of the year for me - Every October I seem to have issues or have a relationship end or whatnot. I dread October usually. And this October is great so far! If you had told me six months ago that I would be happy, down over 50 pounds, possibly about to start seeing a new guy who actually lives in this state, and doing decent in school all in OCTOBER - I never would have believed you! I feel like I should pinch myself to make sure this isn't just a dream.
 
Can I just reiterate that I love my VSG? I know it's not all thanks to my sleeve, but dang, it sure has helped.

This weekend was a big one for me. My husband and I went to Oktoberfest at the local church. It wasn't as fun as I expected but it was interesting to see a priest walking around with a chicken hat on...I am not making this up!!! To top it off, he was playing the accordion. Those priest really know how to have a fun time. LOL The next night, I went to my sister's annual bonfire. For those of you who don't know, my sister is three years out and 125lbs down after having bypass. So, even though the sleeve is different, I do use her for support and inspiration. Plus, she's one of the few people I can straight out ask if she sees a difference. LOL
 
Now, as well all know, stalls happen. They suck, but they happen. I stalled for a month and a half and was so upset that I thought maybe this was the weight my body was supposed to be. I know it sounds crazy, but after watching the scale go up and down between five pounds for that long, you do get a little crazy. My husband should be happy that I didn't have a complete nervous breakdown. Well, my stall broke. I lost 10lbs and it's stayed off. Knowing this, I got prepared to go out. I don't have any winter or fall clothes that really fit. I actually tried on some things that just hung on me....something that has NEVER happened to me. My favorite sweatshirt engulfs me but, the thing is so warm and so comfy that I just don't care. Ok, sorry for the side bar. So, I ended up in a pair of jeans (a size too big) and a sweater (2 sizes too big). Even with the semi baggy clothes, I felt good about myself. I was ready to face the world...or at least the local drunks at Oktoberfest. We went. We looked around,. We left. It just wasn't what we expected. So, we ended up going out to dinner at a local diner. Once inside, I saw some people I have known for awhile who haven't seen me in months or years. It was so wonderful to hear the complements about how I was looking. I think it's exactly what I needed. I have been feeling so low about my weight loss for so long, that having people REALLY see it, made me feel almost famous. Well, maybe not famous, but at least noticed. LOL
 
I came home after the bonfire the next day and was looking at photos. The full length photo makes me look pregs (I'm not) so I'm not sharing that one. However, I have a photo of my face that shocked me. Mind you, the one photo of my sister and I doesn't make my face look this small, but hey, I'll take what I can get. It also doesn't help that my sis is almost 100lbs smaller than I am right now. (Side note: she was never as big as I was so I have to lose much more weight to be her size) Sometimes you just need to see yourself in a new way. I need to see myself as a woman a 100lbs+ smaller than I was less than six months ago. So, I am posting the photo of my face right before surgery and the photo from the fire. Just to help me see the changes and to help others see that going through all this is SOOOOOOOOOOOO worth it (even when it doesn't seem like it) . I just can't wait to see myself in another six months. Maybe one day, my sister and I will be only 10-20lbs different (I have a much bigger build than she does so I don't think my body is made to be 120lbs no matter what any chart says!) So, enjoy the photos. Keep your heads up. But most importantly, know that no matter how long your stall is, if you keep doing what your supposed to, you will get out of the stall.
 

 

 

Alright, I have decided to go ahead with the sleeve. As a matter of fact I am scheduling it today with Dr. Kemmerling.
 
I didn't think you could pay me to go back into surgery after my band removal, but my future happiness is too important to me. I want to be happy, healthy, and want a baby! I need this surgery.
 
I will update with my surgery date later on today!
 
Today!

Can not believe how much time went by since my surgery!!! I am grateful of the results that I have enjoyed so far. Like most slow losers, I wish I had lost more! But things are moving along. I am making changes that will not only help me lose the weight now, but keep if off in the long run.
 
I just went through a super stall, BUT to my surprise I got the most comments and compliments during that period!! Go figure lol!! My upper body slimmed down significantly, but my lower body is stubborn and will not be as flexible:( I did lose, but not as drastically as my top did. I hope that will be the next site of improvement or I am going to look very disproportionate:(
 
 
NSV:
I wore heels for the first time in YEARS today! And I felt ( do I dare say ) so SEXY lol!!! I am of good spirit and faith. I am going to win this fight.