@DomLorenVSG

Thank you so much for your support and well wishes!
- iegal - I am set financially. I am very fortunate and grateful to have inherited money from my father (long story) I will have to most likely pay spousal support, but not for long in this state. I am also a teacher by trade so there is always a job for me if I need one. He has made money off of investments, etc with the money that has come in, but he has become very well off for not working at it. I am convinced that his OCD really hinders his will to do anything. He spends hours organizing receipts, pouring over credit card bills, and Questioning me about every little purchase.
And yes, I think my self esteem about my body drove me to "settle" for someone. He had a job when we were married, and I was impressed that he was good at housework, because I am terrible at it.
BTW- he is taking a nap right now... Is it wrong for this to drive me crazy?
I can't call him a bum, but I am not proud of the way we live. I cant Get him to understand this. It's time to move on, and I am prepared to be a single parent.

UTGal99 :Children need to see that it requires hard work, dedication and commitment to many aspects in life to be successful and happy.
I absolutely agree! And I LOVE the Dr. Seuss quote!

The stomach growling may not be hunger more stomach acid. A PPI (proton pump inhibitor) like Priolsec should help with that. Awesome weight loss!

It is great that you have so many people supporting you in this decision!! Wrap yourself up in activities with your kids and anyone who supports you. Kudos to you for being brave enough to leave a situation that doesn't make you happy. I hope that the "She only left because she got skinny" comments don't come up at all!! I hope the venting helped!

I do 30-60 minutes on the elliptical 5 days a week with 2 or 3 days of strength training. (Doc says we'll be weak and skinny if we don't do some strength training. (low weights with high reps) ) I was doing an hour on the elliptical every time, but I found myself getting tired of it and not wanting to go, so to change it up, I sometimes do just 30 minutes, but at the highest level I can keep up. Kind of a challenge. I love the elliptical, because I've developed a knee problem and the elliptical is the only thing that does not hurt it. (I can't bend it all the way...) So...there's that....

Yesterday, I was whining about how my scale was saying I weighed 180.0, but it refused to go below that amount.
One of my friends suggested I cut off a pinky finger. He asked when do we ever use both pinkies at the same time anyway?
And today, my scale gave in and let me know that I weigh 179.4.
Even better -- I still have all my body parts and didn't even get a drastic haircut to make it happen.
I am loving that my scale is moving down again!

Well.....here I am at 6 months after surgery, down 123lbs. What an awesome ride, and it only gets better.

I just read this... and then did the math and realized I'm at the exact same point as you!!!! I'm 5 weeks today as well and half way to my first goal!!!! I made two goals first to 169 for my highest allowed healthy BMI and second to my dream weight of 145! Awesome! Thank YOU for sharing! Progress is awesommmmmmmeeee!!!

ladydeenj and you too dlmeekie congrats - you are both doing great
being sleeved - way to go - health, happiness.......
WooHoo

I am so thrilled this morning ! I officially made it to halfway there! 5 weeks out and lost 32 lbs! Next phase 32 lbs to go to get to goal 140! Wooooo whoooooo!!! Happy happy happy !

I have been buying clothes in the ladies department size large. So one day I ventured into the plus size store. Let me tell you those clothes were way over priced and ugly as all heck. Now I know why I'm hooked on buying clothes, because the clothes are actually nice. I really hated shopping before, now I'm sure it wasn't only because oft size, but also because of the selection.

I just wrote about this in my blog last week...
My doc finally cleared me to be back in the Water again 15 days post op, and Tuesday (first day after the Labor Day Holiday weekend) I went all out. I have a pretty crazy workout schedule. I play collegiate Water polo 4 nights a week for 2.5 hours, and I swim on the University’s Master's Swim team on my lunch 3 days a week for 1.5 hours. Again this was only a 4 day week and my first time back in the water in about 4 months, plus post-surgery 3 weeks. The first 2 days were the roughest, I was extremely sore and exhausted. Doing this much working out on such little calories is daunting and not for the faint of heart.
I will say that doing team/club sports is night and day different from going to the gym on my own. I'm lucky to stay focused enough to do 45 minutes on an elliptical or treadmill, whereas when I get in the water I'm not staying place, I'm engaging with other people, being pushed by my team members, and have a coach guiding my workouts. I never get bored. My mindset is not to just survive practice, but to be one of the best, swim the fastest, throw the ball the hardest, and be an MVP. When I do get out of the water whether it was water polo or masters swim- I'm Jello, my body is completely exhausted and I feel like an Olympic champion (minus those sweet little gold medals). I have several fitness goals this semester, and I'm so motivated to get into the best shape ever, regardless of what the scale says. Our first ranked NCAA tournament is 3 weeks from today. Bet your bottom I'm going all Kong Fu Panda on my workouts for the next 3 weeks to be ready for this tournament... and the bonus- I'm going to lose weight. I <3 my sleeve.

Just thought I'd post a quick update for my family here at VST. Today I am exactly one year out from surgery. On August 30, 2011, Dr Patrick Domkowski changed my life and introduced me to Rex, my new sleeved tummy. The short of it is that I'm now 117 pounds lighter than I was last year. I'd have given my eye teeth to lose that weight before surgery, but I just never managed to do it! Rex and I have had one heck of a ride and I couldn't have predicted how this year went if I'd have tried.
I lost a best friend. She died suddenly in January, but she was one of my biggest supporters every single day. I'm proud to tell Lynn that I have lost more than her entire body weight. I've lost a couple of other friends along the way. They are still alive, but jealousy has eaten both of them alive. I wish them both well on their journeys. Mine is going a different direction than theirs apparently.
I've gained a TON of family, right here on VST. I want to thank all of you for your support and well-wishes this year and I will continue to try to give back to those who are following in my footsteps. It's wonderful to come here and post the absolutely most bizarre questions and KNOW that someone here has experienced the same problem. You guys have been MY support group even when no one else in the world seems to understand! Thank you all!
So, I'm still about 50 pounds away from my surgeon's original goal for me, although he thinks I'm completely successful. I've lost over 1/3 of my total body weight, more than 72% of the total weight I wanted to lose, and I'm still working my plan. I will get to my goal...then I'll reach the goal the plastic surgeon set for me.
I'll post pictures tomorrow. My house was hit by a tornado on Monday and I've spent most of this week cleaning up from that. I am very lucky that my damage is minor and that no one in my community was injured. My final act of clean up was to go through my closet, which got drenched, and sort through my clothing. Everything that's in there now is either the correct size or too small (for the moment) and I'm sending another six bags of freshly washed, dried and folded clothes off to bless someone else.
I have to work tomorrow, so I'll take and post some pictures after I get dolled up for that!
Again, big hugs to everyone here and, for the newbies, THIS is why I had surgery. So that I could live my life without being held back by anything. All this week I have worked from sunup to sundown on cleaning up, repairing and helping others. Pre-surgery, I could barely walk from my front door to my car. This week, I've proven that I am capable and able to do ANYTHING I need to do, from hauling tree limbs to climbing on a roof to help patch it. I'm living, not merely existing. I love life!!!

Swap it! Take control of the cravings by changing the Peanut Butter (which is probably the fat or salt you want) with a sf kind (I've heard US has something called PB2 which is a good alternative) or get some macadamias to munch on (unsalted are still tasty!)
Get some 0% Greek yoghurt with some fruit in it (i love mixing it with frozen berries for that icecreamy texture!)
Start preparing more... Boil eggs, grill meat, store tins of salmon/tuna in the fridge, make up some savoury cupcakes (in the recipe section)...
Get remotivated however you need!
And remember this is a lifestyle thing, you'll have ups and downs, smiles and frowns, just keep getting back on the horse!!!!!
Peace and best wishes!!!

I actually moved a loooong way from family and friends. I don't have a lot of friends up here, so not many to cull...... Although thinking about it now, there IS someone I need to get away from.
I have refused to even "friend" some of my family members on Facebook because I can't be bothered with the crap they post.

I have had to cut a lot of people out of my life for many different reasons. i had to cut people out for mainly just being negative. i disabled my Facebook page because its full of negativity and stupidity. i also spent way to much time on facebook and it became a distraction. my real friends call or text me when they want to hang out. anyone that brings drama and or negativity i dont talk to anymore. im focusing on making me a better me. Call me selfish but i feel 100 percent better mentally since making those changes.

Emotional Vampires & Toxic People... I'm doing an inventory of all my relationships, family, friends, etc. who have been instrumental in giving me bad advice, not being encouraging, or just breaking my heart, and hurting my feelings. How many people are really my friends because they like having a fat friend as a wingman? My family who tells me that WLS is a cop out? The exbf who said he's just not that attracted to "big girls". It's time to clean house, and dump the negative and replace it with the positive. Who are your emotional vampires and what are you doing to change it?

Thankyou! I've met some really lovely people on here and am so grateful for the support!
I know one day it will have to be myself I look to for reassurance and really look forward to the day when I'm comfortable in my own skin!

Emotional Vampires & Toxic People... I'm doing an inventory of all my relationships, family, friends, etc. who have been instrumental in giving me bad advice, not being encouraging, or just breaking my heart, and hurting my feelings. How many people are really my friends because they like having a fat friend as a wingman? My family who tells me that WLS is a cop out? The exbf who said he's just not that attracted to "big girls". It's time to clean house, and dump the negative and replace it with the positive. Who are your emotional vampires and what are you doing to change it?

I might add, that I'm seriously considering having anymore serious surgies (i.e plastics or dental) in mexico. I'm totally sold.

Wow. I'm so, so, sorry they did that to you. I guess cause I am older, and wiser (and married for 7 years then divorced) I don't pay too much attention to what they say or do, but let's be honest, words do hurt, and when people bring you do down, friends or not you got to find someone to uplift you! I'm so glad you have someone that loves you no matter what! Your journey will only be that much sweeter in the end! And if anyone ever came at me with a fork, joke or not- they wouldn't be standing up by the time I was done with them. Bless you, and I can't wait to see where your journey takes you!!!

So let me describe SEVERAL of the issues I'm dealing with right now, and why I'm closely analyzing who may or may not be in my life. I have know for sometime I've had several friends who used me as the "fat wingman"... little comments like "when you lose weight you could totally knock them dead" and "but your just bigger and there are guys that like big girls, just not the ones you are attracted too." Sounds horrific to hear so called "friends" say this, but here's the catch:
I'm a PhD student. I'm 28. I'm a single mom. I work for th University that I attend, and I do pretty damn well. Oh, and since I got my full time student status back I'm also a collegiate athlete playing Water polo under the NCAA. When you find someone who's doing as much as I am, at the level I am- let me know, cause I want them to be my new best friend.
I'm a threat. When I got divorced 4 years ago, I had so many wives drop me like bad habits because they didn't want a single successful woman around their husbands. I was devistated. Last year when I got accepted for my PhD my family told me no man would ever want an over weight woman with a PhD. I was devistated yet again. Last month I went out with younger college friends to Celebrate the start of the semester, and I literally had a guy walk up to me and say "wow if you could only lose like 50 lbs you could totally compete wtih these other girls." I wasn't devistated- I was mortified.
Since the surgery I've decided to take time off from dating or going out. I decided to focus on my training and weight loss. People I consider my friends I'm watching very closely as the weight comes off. Girls don't like to be threatened and they don't like competition, and boy oh boy am I in the wrong place. I have thousands of light weight co-eds competing for attention. I'm not 21 anymore, and I have a child and responsibilites. But for the few older friends I have, I'm waiting to see who isn't interested in having the fat wingman anymore. WHo starts forgetting to invite me places. And I know I'm not paranoid because when I had several serious conversations wtih people about it, they're responses were all the same... "Oh dom, you will always be Dom the Mom, nothings ever going to change..."
uh huh. Let's see what happens when I drop 70 lbs and hit my goal weight and see what they say.

Love emily bites, and today's mamma (similar to emilys bites). I also have been filtering through the kraft site for recipes along with pilsbury, they have a lot of finger foods/3 or 4 ingredient recipes that I then cook in muffin tin trays for perfect servings. win/win so far.