LorenaVaca

I have told alot of people either. I am not ashamed and do not neccessarily feel the need to hide it. However, I am not sure I am prepared to deal with all the questions. I had a previous surgery date about three years and when I told people I was having surgery, there were so many who came out against it. This time around I just want to get through the surgery without have to answer a gazillion questions while on the other hand I am still trying to wade through all my answers as well. My journey is made even more difficult as I am having surgery with Dr. A in Mexico so I get that "you must be crazy" to go to Mexico to have surgery along with the usual you dont need that spill...you can do it own your own...I know this person that had it and they had so many complications or those doctors do not know the long term effect of that stuff so why you want to be the text case. So I am keeping my decision to a select few for now...

I see so many threads about "I don't want anybody to know". Have tou ever stopped to think about the other side of the coin? When people are secretive about things if you enquire, don't you then assume the worst case scenario? In an office environment the rumors are always so much worse than what is really going on.
My suggestion is to tell them what is going on. You don't have to go so far as to disclose everything. But give them enough to relax their curiosity or concern.
For example. Do you have diabetes? Tell them you are undergoing a procedure that will hopefully cure your diabetes.
Do you have sleep apnea, heart issues? Tell them you are getting a procedure that will cure ore minimize these conditions.
All of these would be true, and once you've had the surgery, you can go back and tell the rest of the story if you so chose.

Im having my surgery in the hospital I work at- so the people who will be caring for me are my co workers. I am pretty open with everyone- although there has been a few ( like my MIL) I have held off on telling. She always is always suggesting diets and other programs she hears about on Dr. Oz and the Dr's. She just loves telling me about other peoples success. (although oddly enough she is overweight herself and has yet to lose an ounce from her suggestions). I don't really know what she has against WLS- but she has her opinion. I don't really care- this procedure is not about her decision- its about mine!!!

I think I'm not prepared to deal with the questions. My office is soooo nosy! All of us have been caught up in the office gossip about why so and so is out of the office. I don't really care what they think, but I'm just not sharing until I'm ready. So, my story is that I'm having a procedure to deal with some underlying heart issues. And, I'm sticking to it!

I wouldn't fake a heart problem to keep someone out of my business.
If you really feel like you must say something, say random foolish stuff and make sure you change it everytime someone asks:
"I'm having hooves implanted because I'm tired of shoe shopping"....and walk away.
"I'm having my nose cut off to spite my face".....and walk away.
"I'm having the hair on my knuckles transplanted to my scalp".......and walk away.
"I'm having my ears cut off because I'm tired of hearing people ask me questions that are none of their business"...and walk away.
"I'm having my fingernails removed because polish is getting too expensive"....and walk away.

I know I shouldn't think like this....but I am sort of ashamed to get surgery....I haven't even told my sister because I don't want anyone to know (she can't keep a secret). Also I keep thinking maybe I could diet one more time...I might stick to it this time. Then I think no I do need this...I'm at a tug of war feeling so down about my self....that I am sinking to a low of surgery? Just throwing my thoughts out there...

My surgery date is Aug 15th so i am 28 days away. I only have to do my liquid diet the week before surgery. I decided i would start preparing myself now and start liquids 3 days on 3 days off all the way up until the week before my surgery. Hopefully this will help to prepare me...and hopefully i will benefit from it and lose a little LBs lol. Good luck to you!

Thank you all you have all helped me open my eyes a lot more. As far as the HIPPA LAW i was so close to bringing it up to her but didnt, just to stay on good terms. I really am so very proud of having my surgery i know its the best for me and my health. I appreciate all of your advice... There are times i feel like ppl are going to judge me and say im lazy and that i am taking the easy way out but i know that that is absolutely not true if anything this will probably be ten times harder because you have to have strength will power courage and so much more... You women are awesome and i know now in my heart i truly have a support group, thank you!

Tell me about it! If Dr. Barker would do some TV ads like Dr. Kim is doing, then everyone could see how gorgeous he is and the ladies would be going to him in droves - not that he doesn't have enough patients already - ha! Those ads he has now don't show off those beautiful eyes of his. Yummy!

BIG D.... I love me some hottie Dr. Barker!!!!

If you don't act ashamed of your choice then people won't really say much. You let then know that you are taking the steps you need to to become the person you want to be. It's worked pretty well for me. I've even turned a couple anti surgery guys into pro surgery after I explained all my pains and years of dieting and failure. I know not everyone is an open book like me but I think it helps people understand when you are more open about it. I can't wait for my surgery, just waiting to make my appointment with the surgeon. Good luck.

The poster that mentioned HIPPA is right. You do have the right to not have to divulge this information. But as you've seen, its not always easy to do so. If your company is large enough, you can go to your hr rep for help.
I'm fortunate that I work for a small company and have a supportive boss. I know not everyone is that lucky.
You've said all you really need to. Good luck!

I am pretty open when people ask questions about my spontaneous weight loss. i tell them i had a surgery to help cure my "fattness". i generally get some laughs but in all honesty i dont care how other people feel about MY decision. most people are supportive and some are negative but at the end of the day you are having this surgery. As far as work the supervisor/work issue. the "Female Surgery" excuse should work.

I work at a college and I was very open with my co-workers and bosses and they have all been super supportive. Some people had questions, but when I tell them the surgery is a tool to help because I haven't been able to keep the weight off on my own, they ultimately understand. I explained that it is about heath, not vanity (or at least not all about vanity ) and they get that too. But, I am a very straightforward person and I don't know any other approach, and I do understand that everyone is not comfotrable with that. Now when I come to work I have a ton of supporters, who are constantally cheering me on and encouraging me. Feels good.

Isnt' it called HIPAA Laws, so she can ask for a dr's note, but she has no legal right to know why you are out!!!! NONE OF HER BUSINESS! I bet if you say your are protected under HIPAA she won't ask you another question.

Requests from your employer
The Privacy Rule does not prevent your supervisor, human resources worker or others from asking you for a doctor’s note or other information about your health if your employer needs the information to administer sick leave, workers’ compensation, wellness programs, or health insurance.

If you say "Female Surgery", most people won't ask any more questions.

I spoke to my doctor about in the future wanting to have more kids and they said that it would not be a problem at all. They suggest waiting 12-18 months post-op to conceive so that i give myself time to heal. Any pregnancy stories post-op? I would love to know that it is going to be safe...i am only 23yrs old and i am no way near done having lil ones. I do trust my doctor after all he is a TopDoc for bariatric surgery but i want to hear success stories to ease my anxiety about it.

I'm 5'5" and currently weigh 195 pounds. That puts me at a BMI of about 32. I haven't seriously discussed surgery with anyone but my husband, but serious I am! When I joke about it with people I know they all say "you don't have that much to lose" or "just try this new diet". But to me, I am finally facing a very painful fact...I can't do it alone! To know me is to know that I don't NEED anyone/anything. I want people and things in my life, but I can do it on my own if I have to. If I set my mind to something I do it! So why can't I do this? I am telling you this not to feel sorry for me, but to understand what finally brought me to this decision of having surgery.
I was 119 pounds when I graduated from high school....on the homecoming court, played sports, top of my class, blah blah blah. Now 20 years later I'm still very successful in my career, have a wonderful family, put myself thru college, but I'm fat. I'm not "a little overweight", pleasantly plump, or any of the other euphemisms. I'm fat! That alone has been a hard fact to face, but face it I am.
I started putting on weight the day I graduated from high school, and while I have tried for YEARS to get back to my ideal weight, it has NEVER happened. I would have limited success when I was young, but ultimately I would gain it all back. And every year add just a few more pounds. Now...well 195 pounds says it all. I lose 20 put on 25, lose 35, put on 40. Nothing has ever stayed off for more than 6 months in the whole darn 20 years. And I WANT ME BACK. Does that make me crazy? Is it really so extreme to have surgery to lose 60-70 pounds? I don't think so, but I would love to hear from those who have been in a similar situation and are several months/years after surgery. Did it last? Did you get to your ideal weight? Would you do it again?
I told my younger sister (who has always been overweight even as a child) I was thinking about this, and she said "I've always been fat so I don't miss being skinny, but I can see how you might". I can't make her understand it's not about wanting to be skinny...it's about wanting to look in the mirror again at myself and not want to cry and think "that's not me".

I think life is tok short to be miserable. I have only battled my weight for about 5-6 years and I am about :100 lbs overweight. That being said, I obviously cant do thia on my own. I got married last year and in the 2 years we were engaged I battled hardcore to lose weight. I was 228 when I started and I went up and down 20-40lbs over and over and over. The month before my wedding I was under 200. The day of my wedding, 212. YEP....i even weighed myself on my wedding day
So a year out and I am now 250lbs. my highest ever. my depression was so bad I didnt like to leave the house. I feel like a freak. so i made the descision to do this. I would have made the same choice if I was back at 212 as well.
i wish you the best of luck

Made these for dinner tonight- 1 was more than enough for me (plus salad). The other adults in my family each ate 2. We all voted this is a definite do again!!!! Portion controlled.
Lasagna Cupcakes
2 cup marinara sauce (I just used 1 jar)
3/4 pound ground beef or turkey
24 wonton wrappers
8 ounces shredded mozzarella
3 ounces Parmesan cheese
4 ounces Ricotta cheese
(optional) basil for garnish
Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Spray muffin tin (12) with cooking spray.
Brown beef and season with salt and pepper. Drain. Add sauce. Mix.
Begin with a wonton wrapper and press it into the bottom of each muffin tin.
Spread with a small spoonful of Ricotta cheese.
Top with a little meat sauce then some parmesan and mozzarella.
Use around 2 teaspoons of all the ingredients depending on your personal preference.
Repeat layers ending with cheese.
Bake for 18-20 minutes or until edges are brown. Remove from oven and let cool for 5 minutes. To remove use a knife to loosen the edges then pop each lasagna out. Garnish with basil (if desired) and serve.