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About Butterflylegacy

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  • Birthday 07/15/1974

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  1. Butterflylegacy

    Large Sleeve - Bypass Revision

    I had my appointment with my Sleeve Surgeon yesterday. It actually went a lot better than I was expecting. Per the PA, my sleeve is not abnormally large, and she said it was typical of what she would expect to see on a sleeve patient 4 months Post-Op. Dr. Kim said it was stretched slightly, but not enough to be of concern to him, and certainly not enough to warrant any additional or subsequent surgeries. Dr. Kim's response to my concerns was that I should not overlook the fact that I've lost (and kept off) 60+ lbs since being sleeved, and reminded me that this is not an insignificant number. He essentially told me that I need to start taking care of myself, and stop putting everything first, like my job, my special needs child, or my struggling marriage. All of these things are impacting my inability to lose the weight, and enabling me to make poor choices in my food. He's 100% right there. I feel my weight is a direct reflection of the amount of the level of uncaring I am feeling after taking care of everyone and everything else. In a nutshell, Dr. Kim said it would not really be possible for the gall bladder surgeon to have been able to note the size of my sleeve when removing the gall bladder due to their locations in regards to each other. He said he would have had to do a lot of "dissection" in order to come to that conclusion. And, since the gall bladder surgeon did not do any type of imaging (barium swallow test) while I was in the ER/Hospital or during any subsequent follow up visits to him, he feels it's speculation on his part to suggest that my sleeve is too large, or was not done right. Additionally, Dr. Kim disagreed with the prescription and approach to dealing with the chronic diarrhea I've had, so he prescribed me a different medicine. The gall bladder surgeon's prescription has not had much of an impact on it, so we'll see if Dr. Kim's approach works. All in all, I have an appointment on the 20th to see the gall bladder surgeon. Dr. Kim's office gave me a print out of my sleeve from my barium swallow test, which I will bring with me. I have another follow up visit with Dr. Kim's office on Dec. 1st, to meet with the Nut, and I am supposed to get lab work and keep a food log between now and then. At the end of the day, it's all about getting back on track. Eating more Protein, less carbs, getting more fluids, exercising up to 2.5 hours if/when possible. The story continues....
  2. Butterflylegacy

    Large Sleeve - Bypass Revision

    Thank you everyone for the kind words, reinforcement, and encouragement. I intend to visit with my original surgeon on the 12th. I will pay $50 for the office visit, and another $50 for the fluoroscope. I have made double sure that my visit is WITH the surgeon, and I fully anticipate being told by him that I did something wrong, didnt followers instructions, etc. I'll accept the responsibility partially. I didnt gain all this weight because I make smart food choices, and I wasn't in "the program" long enough in my opinion for new habits to be formed. I am doubtful that I will resume care by him. I already dislike and distrust him, and I have a better relationship with the bariatric surgeon who removed my gall bladder. Based on his preliminary questionnaire I feel like there's a bit more due diligence upfront, to ensure a better or more long lasting outcome. At least this time, I have the benefit of having an experience to compare it to, and I can use that to my advantage. To answer a previous poster's question - I don't know why they can't make my stomach smaller. That will be one of my questions, both when I see the original surgeon on the 12th, and when I see the gall bladder surgeon on the 20th. I didnt think to ask the gall bladder surgeon when I saw him last week, probably because I was still trying to process the info he was giving me at that time. With that said, my preference would be to be resleeved rather than bypassed. I intentionally didn't choose bypass originally, and I would still not prefer it. I will come back and update after each visit. I agree with the poster about the importance on relying on the advice of medical professionals. My original post was me reaching out for my fellow sleevers to lift me up and surround me with their positivity and support. I was in no way looking for someone to blatantly guide me towards one decision versus another. If anything, I was curious to know if anyone else had a similar experience, and could share their outcome. One is a lonely number afterall.... I hope that through my experience, I can share my results and provide the light at the end of the tunnel for someone else, should I find that light, and should someone else find themselves in the darkness of uncertainty.
  3. I wasn't sure where to post this topic/question, so I am starting here.. I would appreciate any links or references to this topic in responses. Thanks! I was sleeved in June 2010. I had no complications following my VSG and was doing great! At 6 months post-op, my gall bladder tanked, and I was rushed to ER for emergency gall bladder removal. Between the time of my sleeve, and gall bladder removal, I had lost 80 lbs. I was shooting for a total of 150 overall. Since my gall bladder removal, I have lost nothing. As a matter of fact, I've gained 20 lbs. It has been almost 2 years since I had my gall bladder removed. In the past 2 years since having my gall bladder removed, I've dealt with chronic diarrhea immediately following each meal. More so after Breakfast to lunch meals. It would appear that waiting longer into the day to eat would seem to subside this significantly so I would battle every day between waiting to eat, and being starving by 1pm-2pm and eating. I finally contacted the surgeon who removed my gall bladder 2 years ago, to see if there was any solution to this chronic diarrhea. I had waited so long because so much of what I'd read and been told was that it would eventually subside on it's own. The diarrhea happened REGARDLESS of what I ate. It did not matter if I ate an apple, a banana, a salad, or a chocolate chip cookie. The instant food hit my stomach, within 10-15 minutes I was in the bathroom 2-3x and it would just go on like that all day up til about 2pm. When I met with the gall bladder surgeon this week, he seemed less concerned about my diarrhea, and more concerned that I'd waited so long to see him (or my bariatric surgeon) regarding my lack of weight loss. The gall bladder surgeon is also a bariatric surgeon, but not the one who did my sleeve. When he walked in to the exam room, he told me he remembered me from 2 years prior, because he remembered how large my sleeve was, when he removed my gall bladder. He asked me about restriction to which I told him I have little to none, and he told me that I should not be able to eat more than what can fit into the palm of my hand. I have not experienced that at all. I can some days eat whatever I want, and other days not. I have completely fallen off the wagon and it's as if I never had surgery to begin with. (Note: I stopped seeing my original bariatric surgeon because 3 months post-op they stopped accepting my insurance, and I could not afford the $150.00 office visits). The gall bladder surgeon began discussing with me that I would be considered a "surgical failure", since my sleeve is too large, and I haven't lost a significant amount of weight. I started the process at 314 lbs. At my lowest - prior to gall bladder surgery, I was 232 lbs. I am now at 252 lbs. His solution was to try to get me in before the end of the year for a sleeve to bypass revision. Unfortunately for me, since I was originally sleeved, my husband has changed employers, and new insurance does not cover bariatric surgery. So any hopes of having this revision is pointless unless I can pay out of pocket. This is not an option for me at all, as I also have a special needs child who consumes all of our medical budget for his surgeries (which are done with out of network specialists - another source of frustration). I contacted my original sleeve surgeon yesterday and discussed with the nurse what the gall bladder surgeon told me. She seemed pretty annoyed that he would have told me this. She said that I probably do NOT need to have a revision and wants me to come in for a consult with the original surgeon. I'm a little wary of this visit, although I did schedule it mostly out of curiosity. I also contacted a very close friend of mine who is an ER Critical Care Nurse. She was interested in being sleeved by my surgeon after I had it done, and was stopped because of an exclusion in her insurance that didn't allow her to go outside of her hospital network. While she was researching though, she spoke to several Surgical Nurses who told her that the surgeon she was considering (mine) was known for sleeving his patients large and that he was also known for not prescribing a specific medicine that would prevent the gall bladder from going bad. According to this close friend, this particular surgeon did this so that he could almost guarantee two surgeries for each patient. First the sleeve (done too large), and then second, a revision because the patient would come back after a certain amount of time, being dissatisfied with their weight loss. Or, first the sleeve (done too large), and then wait for the gall bladder to go south and then schedule the patient for the removal. Based on this, I would fall into that pattern, and as of right now because I had to have the emergency gall bladder removal he did not get that 2nd surgery out of me. But this information is what is making me wary, because if going to see him on the 12th, he tells me that it is MY fault that I haven't lost weight because I did not stick to the diet plan (which I did between sleeve and gall bladder removal) and that I have some how stretched my sleeve, and I now need to have the bypass, he would/could get the potential second surgery out of me. EXCEPT - I don't have insurance to cover it this time. I have a lot of emotions about this... I did a lot of research on which was the best option for me, best surgeon for me, best long term results for me, etc. Even the gall bladder surgeon was impressed with my depth of knowledge on the topic and the questions I was asking. My emotions are multiplying by the day. I am angry, and frustrated that I am still struggling with my weight and I did not have a higher weight loss out of the gate. I am frustrated that I appear to be "stuck" now because I do not have an insurance plan that will cover it. I am worried that I am going to be fat for the rest of my life. I am afraid of what the original surgeon is going to tell me that any of this is my fault. Based on the information my friend relayed to me from the Surgical Nurses, I looked online to see if I could find information about this to corroborate their claim. I can find nothing but high reviews for my surgeon. Everyone seems pleased with their results, and that's frustrating me even more. Any negative reviews have more to do with his office staff or dealing with insurance issues than anything relating to the success/failure rate of the VSG. I'm not really sure what my question is.. I guess I'm just wondering if anyone has had a similar situation. Maybe some advice. I'm feeling pretty emotional and if I'm being honest, my inclination is to eat my feelings. I'm doing a good job so far not doing that, but it has been a trying past couple of days. Thanks in advance for advice, support, suggestions, and solutions!
  4. Butterflylegacy


  5. Butterflylegacy

    I fell off the wagon.... HARD!

    I'm in Dallas/Ft. Worth. I have a great trainer I work with 2x a week. His name is Paulie Ayala, and he was a world champion boxer. I've picked up some great tips and info from him. Unfortunately I only get him twice a week and I'm usually no good on my own. Thats why I need a workout buddy.
  6. Butterflylegacy

    I fell off the wagon.... HARD!

    Well I just got off my ass and worked out for about 20 minutes in my garage. Started the 30 day squat challenge and did some weights, punching bag and push ups. Its hot and humid here in Texas so my garage was extra toasty. I'm going to try to use this heat to my advantage to get the sweat going. I'm drinking plenty of fluids. Mainly Water and zero calorie Powerade. Today is really the day I've come to terms with what I need to do. I've had a little "come to Jesus" meeting with myself. I've had to tell myself several times today that I am NOT hungry. Just found myself bored and had to find a distraction. I need to pay attention to the patterns of when I am snacking, binging, and soothing myself. I was off to such a great start and I'm disappointed in myself that I let other things distract me and get me off course. I am 238 today. I want to be under 200 lbs by Labor Day. Thats what I'd like to focus on right now. Thank you all for your support and encouragement. I need to come back here more frequently. I think I consciously stopped when I got off track back then. VST is part of what I need to stay true to my goals!!
  7. Hi all, I'm looking for some motivation and I probably need a good ass swatting while we're at it!! I am almost one year out (2 weeks shy) and I have been completely off track since December. I had my gall bladder removed at the end od November (emergency) and I haven't lost any weight since then. I've been gaining and losing the same 3-5 pounds and have noticed (and tried to ignore) myself falling back into old damaging habits. Since my surgery I've had a major upheaval at work, and have been dealing with a lot more responsibility and stress. I began having problems with my husband which came close and may possibly still result in divorce. I do not have a strong support network and I've always been kind of a loner anyway. I've recently been telling myself that i would get myself back on track after our anniversary trip to Mexico with my husband, but I've had to postpone that due to work. I'm disappointed not to be going but I'm trying to look at is as a blessing in disguise. I've decided that I need to take the bull by the horns and just get back on track. Its so much harder to do than to say though. food has always been my comfort and with all the stress at work and at home, i am acutely aware that i am walking a very dangerous path. I do not feel any kind of restriction when i eat and i am scared and embarrassed to go to the doctor to see if im stretched back to pre surgery. I've been thinking about going back on the pre surgery liquid/protein shake diet and kind of starting over. I feel like maybe that will get my head back in the game. I would like to point out that making a doctors appointment is not possible for me right now due to my work schedule (hence canceled vacation) and im not likely going to be able to go at least for another month or so. I'm looking for some support and motivation. I have been working out twice a week for the past 5-7 months give or take and i intend to up that immediately. I put an ad on craigslist locally for a workout buddy and have had one person respond so far. Im very serious about getting back on the wagon. This post is my public proclamation of that intention.
  8. Butterflylegacy

    I Want My Stomach And My Money Back! (J/k)

    Time to evaluate maybe the plan you're on? Are you watching your Protein and fat content? Are you drinking enough Water? Are you aware of how much sugar/salt you're consuming? Are exercising and challenging yourself? I've found whenever i hit a significant stall that I've allowed myself to wander off track. Our habits are sewn into the fabric of our existence. So many times I've caught myself falling back into old comfortable (bad) habits. What I've learned is that only I can make it happen. If I eat something bad and make bad choices then nothing good is going to come of that. I also struggle to stay off the scale. I've found when i do though, I am usually happier than when I obsessively weigh. I recently had my gall bladder removed and gained 18 lbs while in the hospital. Thankfully it was all water weight from the IV but it took me almost 2.5 weeks just to get back to where I was prior. It was hard to accept, but i kept pushing through, and as a reward for my hardwork i was able to wear a dress that was an XL to my work Christmas party this year. Last years dress was a 4X. It will happen for you if you work at it. I have always been a sedentary person. As you can see above, I've been boxing and walking for exercise. Due to the gall bladder, I've been out of the gym for a few weeks. Let me tell you.... I can't wait to get back. It's hard, and it's challenging, but i love the way i feel when I'm done! I've attached some quotes that inspire me. Hopefully there's one or two that speak to you. :-) Good luck!!!
  9. Butterflylegacy

    I Want

    My favorite meal is Thanksgiving and I made an entire thanksgiving dinner on the night before I started my preop diet. It was a very special night for me and my family and I have no regrets having done it. I am a little over 4 mos postop and down 63#. I still love Thanksgiving and I'm looking forward to it this year. My plate will be smaller, and I'll be full a lot faster, but I don't think there's anything wrong with enjoying a 'last meal' before surgery. For me, it wasn't sad or based on indulgence. It was an acknowledgment of the choice I was making and it gave me a wonderful sense of closure. I think as long as you analyze why (and what) you want to eat as that meal and approach it with a firm understanding that you will look and feel much differently about food after surgery, you'll be fine. Good luck to you!! Sent from my SGH-T679 using VST
  10. Butterflylegacy

    Just How Much Is Everyone Exercising?

    Thanks - I actually do eat a fair share of peanut butter and avocados... (not together of course!!) LOL My daily food menu looks a little like this: Wake up - 1/2 cup of coffee w/half and half Work/Breakfast - toasted whole grain (100 calorie) english muffin with reduced fat JIF peanut butter or a cup of instant cream of wheat with a tsp of butter and a tsp of honey lunch - on workout days I usually eat a frozen breaded chicken breast stuffed with broccoli and cheese - on non-work out days I eat a turkey wrap with lettuce, tomato, avocado/guac dinner - black Beans w/homemade guac on a wheat tortilla, sometimes just guac and chips Snacks - bananas, peaches, apples, peanut butter... And that's about it... I guess I don't really feel like I'm getting the most out of what I'm eating, but I'm also not very disciplined with planning my meals and figuring out what I want, when I want it. I have been AWESOME at staying away from sweets, like cakes, Cookies, etc. I don't even think about stuff like that anymore. But - I do think if I made up some snack packs to munch on through out the day, it might kick start my already slow metabolism and help me get the best out of my work outs.
  11. Butterflylegacy

    Just How Much Is Everyone Exercising?

    I am doing a boxing class 2x a week, and walking on my treadmill 15-20 minutes 2-3x a week. I've been doing the boxing class for 3 weeks now, and while I am watching the inches disappear, my scale seems to be flipping me off. I am tired of hearing those around me telling me that I'm "building muscle".. 3 weeks is NOT long enough for that to happen and impact the scale. I am 4 months out and I have lost between 55-60 lbs, and I have a handful of stalls to keep me motivated. I spoke to a lap-band friend of mine last night who told me that I just need to eat. I have had a really hard time wanting to eat for the past 2 months. I'm just not hungry, and when I do eat, I feel soooo full afterwards. After talking to my friend last night, he made so much sense. His suggestion was to get the snack pack baggies and fill them up with easy to eat Snacks, fruit, nuts, cheese, lunch meat, etc. and to snack on these throughout the day. His thoughts were that because I have been eating so little, whatever I am putting in, my body is storing - which makes so much sense to me, because that's pretty much how I ended up putting up so much of my weight to begin with. I'm planning on going to the grocery store this weekend with the intention of getting the items needed to try his theory. I'm really hoping that it works too!! Please understand also that I am not looking for epic movement on the scale - maybe a 1/4 to 1/2 a pound a day would be sufficient. It's just so frustrating when you are working out and exercising and nothing is happening!!! I'll keep you posted to let you know if the snack pack/constant eating plan works!
  12. Butterflylegacy

    Highest Weight...

    Pre-Op: 314 lbs. 3.5 months Post-Op: 256 lbs.
  13. Butterflylegacy

    I Want My Stomach And My Money Back! (J/k)

    Sorry - my crazy phone sent my last post before I was finished typing!! The stalls can be discouraging. It DOES take time for your body to adjust. You have to think to yourself, how many other times in your life have you lost any significant amount of weight in such a short amount of time? What extreme measures (if any) did you take to accomplish that? This is NOT a diet. This is NOT an exercise regime. This IS a lifestyle change. Just like getting married, or having children, there are going to be ups and downs. There will be highs and lows. The key is to not give up. All you have to do is put one foot in front of the other. Lean on those who have carved the path before you. Learn from their failures and their successes! I have been battling my stalls since almost 3-4 weeks out, just like many of you. Once I broke through the 1st stall, I have been on a series of other stalls, where I gain and lose the same 3 lbs over and over again. I've started boxing classes 2x a week, and let me tell you - these are no Mickey Mouse work outs!! On the other 3 days of the week, I commit to 15 minutes on my treadmill.. with a goal to get up to 30 minutes. I allow myself to not think or worry about exercise during the weekend, so that I can maximize my time with my husband and son. Eventually, I hope that the 3 of us will be doing activities that incorporate physical activity, which will just round out my week. There is a baseline that all Sleevers can adhere to, but at some point you have to take personal control of your future and determine what you're going to do to move the weight. The surgery in and of itself is just a jumping off point. If you put garbage in, you're going to get garbage out. Do I follow a strict diet? No, not always. I allow myself something I shouldn't have every now and again, but I also remind myself that those things (whatever they are for me, you, whomever) is what backed me into a corner and caused me to seek out this solution in the first place. Protein is so important!! Find it - it's out there on a surprisingly vast list of foods. You WILL find a protein source that you like. Personally, I struggle with Water. I loved water pre-op, and I still like it now. I dislike that I can't just guzzle it down anymore. Having to sip, sip, sip, makes it very challenging to meet my hydration goals. (Shrug) It's just one more thing on my list of things to overcome. No one is expecting you to be perfect. But you do have to take action. The surgery is not the end of the road. It's just the beginning. For those of you that are early into your sleeve journey, it will consume your thoughts and make you question everything. I am not that far into my journey, but I can honestly say that I don't think about it all the time. After you make those small adjustments and figure out your comfort zone you'll relax into your new life, and when that happens, I hope you take a moment to smile, and reflect about how amazing you are, and you are proud of your accomplishments!! I know I am!!
  14. Butterflylegacy

    Anyone Tried Boxing?

    Hi all! Just found this thread, and I loved reading everyone's posts and suggestions! My boss has been boxing for excercise for quite some time now, and I inquired to him about joining his gym. He did one better, and arranged for the owner/trainer to offer 2 classes a week for anyone in my office that wanted to go. This week was our first week, and we had 11 people sign up!! I had my 2nd work out today, and I am still kind of loopy!! I actually had to call surgeon's office afterwards to get advice on calorie consumption, because I don't think 800 calories a day is going to cut it for me for that kind of a work out!! I was really proud of myself though, I hung in there, even with the skinny folks (who by the way were complaining way more than I was!!) I do have a question though, which I asked the trainer and he wasn't really sure how to advise me... Do you think there is a better/specific kind of protein/carb combination that would be helpful for me to eat prior to the work out? If so, how much time prior would you suggest? The girl I spoke to on the phone at the Surgeon's office recommended these Bullet Protein drinks you can get at GNC and Vitamin Shoppe, but I already know that they have the kind of protein that weight lifters use to bulk up, and I am not looking for that. Any suggestions would be appreciated!! I have to say - the work out is a tough one, but I am loving every minute of it!! There's a lot of muscle confusion, and my goal is to get to my goal weight and not need ANY plastic surgery to remove excess skin. I'm 4 months PO and I'm sooo excited to begin this next chapter! Thanks all!

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