newlife4nekaylyn

Know what your getting into and any kind of surgery is dangerous if you want to be technical about it lol. Make sure you have a good doctor and that you know all the risk. I was scared and i had been told it didn't work but here i am today 85lbs lighter in a size Large from an XXXL and a pant size of 11 from a 20. So if its what you want and what you think is best for you don't let anyone ever get you down!!!!! Its your life and you have live the way that you want to. People are sometimes downers and you should ask them if they have ever had it. Listen to your head and your heart. And again make sure you have a good doctor that knows what he is doing. But that's a little important in any surgery right??? I think so Good luck and Keep your head up. Ask your Dr questions they know more then most people about what they are doing.

I had the very same problem with the shakes and i wasnt hungry at all. If you mix mostly milk with the shakes its is better you just have to drink more. And as for the gas pains walk allot. It sucks but that helps so much. And they gave me a breathing test to do like a billion times a day and that made me burp and also got rid of some of the gas pains that i had. I hope that helps. Best of luck

Best of luck to you in your journey with this!! Liquid diet is hard and there are lots of times i wish i could just eat something. Just remember when you get hungry just drink the shakes and its all worth it but you have to listen to what the doctor has to say! Again good luck!

Ok as everyone knows and as i have said before i have had an obession with food my whole life. Starting from when i was about four years old. I think that is when it started. I remember sitting in the living room watching my cartoons while my mom worked in her office in our home. I ran in and ask may i please have a snack. My mother told me no you may not. I was hungry and not fully understanding the reason why i couldn't have one of my favorite snacks (a hot dog with cheese no bread) i went in to the kitchen and i took it any ways. I took my stolen snack back to the living room and ate it as fast as i could before i herd the calculator machine stop. That would have been where the problem seem to come from, being told no when i was really hungry. Back the i didn't know what fat was or what over weight was, i was a healthy little girl but again with big bones and i wasn't fat! I remember many times eating dinner and not eating everything on my plate and getting in trouble and then later when i would be hungry being told no that i couldn't have something because i didn't clean my plate. I was always told to clean my plate and then i could have something. Well when a child doesn't make his/her own plate its a little hard to say you have to eat everything when the child gave it a good run. But a child's stomach can only hold so much at a time. My mom would always make dinner or order it in, sit me down in the living room with a small child sized TV tray and load a plate not really load but give me small portions and give me about three cups of juice, milk, and water. I was told i had to eat and drink everything. Thinking about all this now i can understand why i really didn't eat everything on my plate most times i would just drink to much and not be hungry. I don't want to blame my mom for this but then again she was part of the cause for my food obsession. I am not saying that i was a miss treated child no i had everything a kid could ever want and i didn't want for anything. My mom was obsessed with body image and the way that she looked and the way that i looked. Being a mother now myself i can kind of understand somethings that she did, but i will never be able to understand why she did some of the things that she did to me. Here is why i want to talk about this because i have wrote briefly about this but never really told any one but my husband my obsession with food. Its not that i just love the taste of food and its not that i love the smell or different foods its that i have a problem with food. The best that i can tell any one is that i have had eating disorders and an unhealthy obsession with food. Life with food wasn't a good life for me I realized early on that if i could sneak food then i wouldn't have to ask for it therefore i wouldn't have to be told no and i wouldn't have to be hungry. I was told no and could deal with it i wasn't a spoiled kid i knew the word no and i didn't through fits but for me being told no to food was just being mean. I never question why i was told no because that's just the way life was i was told no and i was never to question it. And i really didn't. I guess the next time i remember a problem involving food was when i was about six years old, My mom put me in every dance class possible and i loved basketball i wanted to be a dancer and play basketball when i got older i remember telling my grandmother. But my mom told me that there are no fat dancers. I didn't understand but one night at dinner she told me i couldn't have any more food because i wanted to be a dancer. It was a little like she was using my dreams against me. I didn't really care because after that i learned if i went and ate with my grandma every night then she would let me have seconds on anything that i wanted. When i was five we moved from Bedford Texas to ranger Texas because my mom wanted to sale ostriches and live on our family ranch. She moved my grandma and grandpa out there to so we lived in a little house and down the road a bit they had a house. It got to the point that i stayed at my grandmas all the time because her house was warm and because i loved her and wanted to be around her all the time. When i was six she started teaching me little things to cook, she told me what to put in and how much and how to measure things and all that fun stuff. By the age of eight i could make my favorite meal all by my self. She called it stuffed weenies, you take a weenie and cut it open and fill it with mustered and mashed potatoes and then add cheese on the top. My mom had a fight with my grandma about how much she was letting me eat all the time and that i was getting fat. I wasn't meant to hear that conversation but i did and it hurt my feelings. I didn't stay in all the time I loved to go outside and play and i did all the time. I remember my grandpa would pick me up from school and take me to his house and my grandma would let me have whatever i wanted as an after school snack and i would watch my cartoons and do my home work and go outside and play. If i was eating an my mom was about to come in my grandpa would either come and tell me or he would hit the floor really hard with his cane so i would know to put away whatever i was eating. sometimes i would get caught with my food and i would be in trouble and my mom would tell me that i had to go home. I never wanted to leave my grandmas house it was my safe house to do what i wanted. When i would go home i usually had to heat up my own dinner and do my home work which wasn't fun with my mom she had very little patience's for my lack of math skills or that i had a hard time reading. Pulse i was always hungry when i would go to sleep. When i got to be about 14 we moved into a new home still on the ranch and still not very far from my grandma. My grandma and grandpa where both getting older and my grandma had Alzheimer and my grandpa had gone blind in both eyes. i didn't have a food outlet and my grandma kept me all that summer and bought me whatever i wanted and all the sodas i could drink which i said before with my mom wasn't allowed. I had gained weight and my mom only came down on me harder. I still wasn't fat but she didnt see that. She and my dad would ask me do you really need to eat that? They would cook spaghetti and i wasn't supposed to eat it i still don't know what i was supposed to eat but every time i would take a bite they would watch me to the point of i just didn't want to eat any more. I had stopped eating for two weeks and my mom thought it was a good thing. I stopped because she told me that cheerleaders where not fat. And i was trying out but didn't make it and i was told if i had lost more weight then i could have made it. I never tried out again for fear that my life with food would be a bigger hell then it already was. I weight a good 100lbs at the age of 14 and gained about thirty pound that year because of all the weight lifting i was doing and at the end of the year i weighted 130lbs but again i wasn't fat i was big boned and had lots of muscles all the way up until i was 16 i weight the same. I had a rundown of diet pills to take every day and shakes that i was supposed to drink. When i was 16 i was sick of being told i couldn't have this and i couldn't drink that so sick to the point that i stopped eating for about four weeks i found that I could drink soda and stay fool. i lost weight and started weighting about 120 my mom said that i should keep doing what i was doing. I was sick of her and started to just not like her and not want to be around her. I also started to binge eat i would eat and eat until i threw up. My mom and dad where gone most of my sophomore year and left me 300$ for gas food and all the stuff that i might need pulse my lunch money for school. Instead of going out like most kids my age would have done i would stay at home and eat. I would cook rice and mac and cheese and all the things that i couldn't have normally. I would eat so much i couldn't even sleep at night and i would wake up at night just to eat more. On the weekends i would stay at home and lock all the doors and eat. That's when i thought maybe i have a problem. i would wake up at night when my mom and dad where sleeping and sneak food out of the fridge and hoped that no one found out in the mornings. I had lots of basketball games and came home real late at night and there wouldn't be any food from dinner for me that was my moms way of saying i was getting fat and didn't need to eat. That only seem to add to my problem i would get home from a basketball game or any after school things and go to a fast food place and get all kinds of food and eat all the way home. I wasnt fat i worked out like crazy then. That was my life until i went to college and found out that if i wanted it i could have it. Again by the time i realized i was over weight i was a good 240lbs. My mom would talk to my friends and ask them if i was drinking cokes, when she came to where i was living she would see a coke can and tell me "this is why you are as big as a barn" she would tell all my friends that i was as big as a barn and just be cruel and mean. That didn't want to make me loose weight that only add to my problem. I got to a point of food was the only think that i could count on all the time. It was always there and it seem to always make me feel better. My dad has a conversation with me about my weight right after a horrible relationship, he told me that no man will ever want me because i was so fat. i was 240 and while i know that isn't the ideal weight i was still a person and things like that still hurt me. I went to the kitchen that night and just ate and ate and ate. i was on a roller coaster for the worst. I didn't think i would ever have anyone to love me because of that conversation right there. When i met my husband i was about 250 or more i didn't believe that he wanted to marry me or even that he loved me. by the time we got married i was about 265 or 275. But she said that he loved me no matter what. we got married and by last summer i was a good 285lbs. At that time my mom informed me that my husband was going to leave me if i didn't loose weight. that made me eat more and more i hated her i hated me and i hated my husband who said he would always love me and that i shouldn't listen to any one. I cant say that i love food in fact i hate food but obsessed yes. I am my husband told me that when we would sit down for dinner before i would eat about three plateful of food and it wasn't because i was hungry its because i could. I talked to a consular about my surgery. He asked me how i felt about food i said i hate it but its like im obsessed and that all that i can think about and i cant make myself stop on my own i need help. I needed the help to see that food didn't control me that i could control what i wanted and what i didn't. I needed more then anything to know that i was in control again. And without lap band and my Doctor i would have never been possible for me to get over the control that food had on me. Some times i still have the want to to just go and eat and eat but i don't have to and i have the control not to. So yes i am still obsessed with food but it doesn't have control over me any more. Being an overweight mom was hard for me and i was doing wrong with my kids and i can see that now. I would let then eat 24/7 whatever they wanted any time they wanted and that was wrong of me. They would eat all the time. I could see my own son start to get a big belly and sometimes throw up from eating way to much. I realized that kids shouldn't have to clean there plate that if they are full they should stop eating. Since i had surgery and lost weight i give smaller portions to my family and they are getting healthy along with me. Something else good did come from my surgery my family is healthy and all at healthy weights for there ages now. I let them have snacks like pizza rolls and stuff but i don't let them eat all day long i ask them are you hungry or are you board? Usually the answer is just board mom so i give them a game to play out side or hand them a basketball and tell them to go play. They are not starving and they are healthy and happy and they will never have to sneak food from our house all they have to do is get what they want.

Well thank you. I am trying with my kids to teach them that there is a difference of hungry and board i ask them to always ask their self am i board or hungry. i will never put my kids on a diet if that makes me a bad mom then oh well i want my kids to be happy and not have food as a crutch. Moms can be harsh but my mom and i have an understanding and she is better with my kids then she was with me. it took some long talks but i think she gets it now.

Well its a new day and that means new obstetrical, I have found since me and lap band became friends that i have new things to deal with everyday. What are you talking about you might ask well here we go lol. Before banding i would wake up in the mornings slowly get out of bed and want to cry as soon as my feet hit the floor. my feet hurt and my back was in a big amount of pain. Then i would go to the bathroom, Then strait to the kitchen for a soda and the remote. not to menchen i would wake up at eleven if i didnt have to take kids to school. any ways after my soda i would head to the fridge for my breakfast which was usually leftovers from the night before and since i would wake up at like 11 or 12 i didnt see the point in trying breakfast. so i would eat ten times to much and then it was lay around and watch tv, play on the computer, or maybe wash a load or two of clothes. I didnt have energy to do anything any more. And my clothes where always jeans when cold and an XXXL t-shirt and if it was hot or warm basketball shorts and an XXXL t-shirt. I mean dont get me wrong i had very beautiful clothes but i was to big to wear them. So that was my before life all that right there i didnt like to go or do anything! I was a total couch potato! Now this is pretty much what i face every morning i will wake up uncurl myself (i usually wake up with my knees in my chest) then i will get up out of bed stretch no pain. journey to my bathroom do my stuff, go to the kitchen start my coffee, feed my dogs play with them a while, get my coffee and get on the computer and usually this is all before i wake up the kids to go to school or like a day like today where it is spring break all before nine o'clock. any ways i drink my coffee and get on the computer and check my email, and i run a business from home called Pomeranian's place. after all my computer stuff is done and all the coffee is gone i start off with maybe a protein shake because its so hard to eat in the mornings or i just mix protein and fiber with the coffee that i am drinking. Then i start off my day with cleaning (sometimes lol) and running earns like food shopping and just everyday life stuff. I usually always try to eat by 12 in less i am working at my other job which i got in October, then i will eat at one because i dont get off until 12:30 most days. After my lunch time meal is done i will do some more cleaning or play with the dogs, then maybe go and get the kids from school or when they dont have school i will work in the garden i am planting or mow the yard i find that i love to be outside now. And i am just waiting and counting down days until summer when i can go swimming anytime that i want. And clothes well for one i had to by all new clothes and i find myself bying things that i really love and no t-shirts my sizes now are pants size 11-10 and shirts xl to large. but i can buy girls shorts and look good in them again nothing skanky im to old for that lol. well i dont think i am to old i am 25 but with three kids i don't want to embarrass them. My point is is that after lap band i feel better i feel the need to get out and go. instead of trying to find the closest parking spot at a mall or store i find one that is farther away i mean yeah i dont want to loose the car one and two sometimes i just want to get home after a long day at the mall. Thats another things shopping before i hated malls and i hated food shopping. I hated malls because most stores just dont make things for big women. And food shopping because that is when people are the meanest. When they see one big girl with a basket full of food they tend to sometimes say "and she wonders why she is so fat" any one else ever hear that? It will make you cry and just leave but what they dont think about is i have four other people at home besides me. Let me clear something up i knew i was fat and i knew i had a problem but until someone is in the same place that you are they will never understand what your going through. As for malls now i love it no one looks at me crazy when i pick up a little shirt and no one says anything about do u really thing that you can wear that? No its really not like that for me. Here is a good story it was in january when i had just hit the 100's i needed new clothes and so i went shopping at a mall. What i didnt realize was that i had no clue what i was supposed to wear. I knew the size 14s i had on where way to big for me now and the XXL shirt i had on was also way to big. I went in to a store called the buckle. I was greated by a girl and a guy, they asked me what are you looking for i said i dont know. so the guy must have seen that i was almost ready to burst into tears and he came over and said what can i help you find what kinds of clothes do u like i said well i really dont know. He said what do you mean you dont know. I said well you dont understand before now all i have been wearing is basketball shorts and t-shirts. he smiled and said why i told him because before now i weighed about 300lbs he smiled and said no you didnt, i said um yeah i did and now that i can wear things in this store i dont even know where to start. He said well how much do you weigh now i said 198. he stoped and said holly crap! but he brought me all kinds of things to try on and worked with me untill i found a pair of jeans that fit perfect. He asked what size i was wearing right now i said a 14 he said no you my friend are in a size 11-12! Thanks to that guy i can now go into a store and know exactly what im looking for and what to buy although my size has dropped again i still know where i am supposed to be. I know many people have had to feel like this sometime in there lives right. It is just so awesome to know that when i tell people how big i was they are like no way your so little now. Ill admit after that i went a little extream with the weight loss. And this right here is why they will not fill my band i lost to much weight to fast and with out really seeing it i was in trouble. I haven't been filled since January. I wasnt eating like i was supposed to and no i wasn't eating crap i was eating maybe once a day. and my band gets tighter and tighter when i don't eat. again i dont know why this happens it just seems to happen. I would eat one slice of lunch meat for lunch and again for dinner. I wasn't hungry and if i thought i might be i would drink something. Well my husband started trying to make me eat and thats when the throwing up started and im still fighting with it but im also eating right again and im trying very hard to do what i know i am supposed to do. And the treat of going to the hospital makes me want to stay on track. What i was doing wasn't right but i got carried away with all the weight that i was loosing and weighing myself everyday wasn't helping. And my scale was way off and that wasn't helping either when i thought that i weighted 198 or like a month and what i really was weighting was 189 well that's a big difference. I am back on track now and i gained a little weight back but it wasn't bad i didnt crumple and die but im slowly loosing weight again and the way that i am supposed to so im happy and i only weight myself once a month and when the doctor does it for me. And that takes a lot of pressure off my shoulder. So even if you slip a little make sure you have someone to catch you and throw you back in place because everyone needs someone while dealing with change. And im not going to stop im am just going to do it smarter. And at the end of the day i know i am better then one year ago. and that to me is well worth it.

Wow thank you so much!! Its people like you that make me what to keep up my hard work. I am so happy that you have chosen to do the lap band. It was really hard to me to even begain to think of me being in the 100's to and the thought of me not being able to do it was a scary one but once the weight starts to come off and you feel better and you start to have this drive to get out and do something then it makes it all seem easy. Just remember im always here if you need to talk to someone and ill try to help you out. and Remember everyone is different and everyone looses different. Best of luck to you i know you can do it!!

One day while my husband and i where not married but a couple i went out to where he works for lunch, As we ate our lunch we got to talking about this guy that he didn't like and i had just seen. I ask what his name was he said Robbie i said oh like my name lol he said yes. We where talking and the conversation came up that he had had lap band surgery about two years ago. I said well how much did he weigh before? My husband said he weights more now then he did when he started. I could tell i had a puzzled look on my face and i said but my real mother had gastric bypass and she lost about 200lbs. He said yeah well he said lap band doesn't work. That right there was my first conversation about lap band and the first time that i had even herd of it I thought well that will be something that i never ever do and just forgot about it. Until i considered the surgery for myself after i found a doctor that would do it and it not cost an arm, leg, and liver then i got to thinking about that very conversation. I was a little worried so i got online and looked it up. I stubbed on a video on YouTube about lap band and i saw that people did really really good with it. I was confused and wanted to know why in the world this guy had only gained weight. So who better to ask then the doctor himself right. Well my appointment came around and i had so many question and thoughts and was pretty much scared crapless why i still don't know but i did ask if this going to work because there is a guy and he said it doesn't work and he gained lots of weight back. The doctor and the dietitian both said you have to make it work. It is nothing but a tool and you can cheat it but really your only cheating yourself. I said so is there a way that i can know that i wouldn't end up bigger then when i started? They said yes you do what your supposed to and don't try to cheat your band and make sure that you have fills like your supposed to. I said really that's it. The dietitian said its a tool its there to help you loose the weight, if you are not serious about it and you continue to do what your doing now then NO it will not work and it will be no ones fault but your own.So i left that day with a new look on life and a new feeling about life i thought well i can do this and i want to, I want to be the person that i feel like i am on the inside! But the thought was still in my head if this guy gained so much weight back what did he do wrong. So i asked my husband who later came back and told me, He had one fill, drank sodas, ate whatever he wanted and more. That was all i had to hear was that the band didnt fail him he failed the band. And **** happens i know but i still cant for the life of me understand why someone would pay so much money to have this done and not do what they know they are supposed to do? Its not even that hard to stick to really. Its protein really you just have to make sure that your getting lots of protein and not lots of crap. Yeah im sure it will not kill you to eat bread but the first time it gets stuck i promise you probably will not be eating bread again. Grease the first time you get heart burn real bad and throw it up you probably will try and stay away from it right? I know i do. Sugar well they make all kinds of sugar for people now that cant have real sugar its not hard to just stop buying and sub it for the fake sugar. Sodas I can see being a problem. I don't miss the taste and i really don't miss buying them the only thing i really miss are the bubbles. I know it sounds really crazy but that's really all that i miss about them. I haven't had a soda since august. Candy wasn't hard for me to give up i don't like it any ways. Chocolate well you can find it in sugar free and most of it now is pretty good. I will eat dark chocolate but i don't like to much of the rest. Cookies i will be the first to tell you i went through a cookie faze but again it in moderation i didn't just sit down and eat a whole box of cookies just about two or three a day and i didn't gain anything. Ice cream again i am going through that faze right now and still in moderation. I remember when i could sit down and eat a whole pint of Ben and Jerry's by myself now it takes me weeks and weeks to get through one and still i don't weigh any more. The band isn't there to be a BIG DIET your whole life its there as a tool so you can learn to control your portions and control what you eat and to know that most the time its not that your hungry but your board and that's what people tend to do when they are board is eat. Why i don't really know it just seems to be the thing to do. That's why i am going to say this if you dont work with your band it will NOT work with you. It didn't take you one night to gain all the weight and its not going to take one night to loose all the weight. Hell it might even take longer then a year but if you are doing what your supposed to be doing to work with the band then there shouldn't be a problem! Now don't get me wrong there are ways the band can fail and i have read about it and watched it on YouTube but most of them where fixable unless the person didn't want them fixed or couldn't have them fixed. I have herd about a hole in the band where it leaks the water and wont fill that is the bands fault not yours. Also your band can slip and they will tell you that and from all the ones that i have herd about its because of the person not listening when they say very clearly DO NOT EAT HARD FOOD. Don't eat to soon and don't do anything that they tell you not to do there are reasons they are telling you this. Its not to piss you off and its not to hurt you its because they want you to have success with the band. Now what you cant always help its when you have a tummy bug and are throwing up to hard your band can slip and i have read that you cant even keep down liquid and there is horrible pain in your lower back and chest. I hope i don't ever have that! But really the band can only work if you work with your band. If you don't want to work with the band then don't worry about the surgery because you probably shouldn't get it. Im not trying to be mean im just saying i am so sick of people saying the band doesn't work. I think its a bitterness that it didn't work for someone and they are pissed and they don't want anyone else to get the band because for them it didn't work. I can sit here an honestly say all the bad things that i have been through have been MY OWN DAMN FAULT. And i will say that so far every time except for the tummy bug there just wasn't anything any one could do for me. It wasn't really anyone's fault. I could blame everyone but at the end of it all i am the only one that is putting things in my mouth. No one else does it for me. So don't let anyone put you down if you want lap band and think its the best thing for you then you get it and make everyone else eat their harsh mean words! Because i know without a doubt that you all can do it and everyone can make it work for them. There will be bumps, bruises, scratches, cuts, stops, slips, tears, pain, sweat, emotions, and maybe even some heart aches along the way but you have to remember your starting a new life. And with new things comes other new things. And im sure you can always find a friend on here who will understand what your dealing with and can find a way to help you to deal, and heal from whatever it is. And never let others get you down. Because once you see the new you, you will smile and know that it was all worth it and it really wasn't so bad it was really kind of fun. And once you see the 100's mark even if its 199 you will feel joy and just feel like you can rule the world and maybe even cry with happiness. Always remember this you didn't get fat over night so don't think you will get skinny over night. It takes work and more work and time.

Thank you both! I was kinda scared that i would get some kind of hell for what i wrote but then again i didn't lie. I know you have to work and every day is a challenge that you your self have to met no one but you can do it and its not a magic trick its hard work. But i feel that it is all worth it! thank you both for the feed back and aew i will send you a message to explain my band to you. Good luck to you both!

I agree with you Donna and im not here to put anyone down i know that life with the band is hard. I know that i cant eat BBQ or stew meat or any kind of hard meat but I am the same i will not eat mushy food if i don't have to. mushy foods slip right through the band and you feel hungry again at least do. Its a learning thing and you have to learn how to do things all over again. If it hasn't worked in three years then yes i would be VERY pissed and want something different too. I cant blame you. I would find a new doctor and tell him your problems and see if he can help you out with the band and if not then i wish you the very best of luck with the sleeve.

Never let the negative get you down usually if someone fails its not the bands fault it is there own. I was planing on writeing about that later lol. Any ways you keep your your happy thoughts and remember if you need any help along the way im only a message away!

It took me five months to see that i had lost weight. It took my mom forcing me to into a size 16 from a 20 (because i was scared they wouldn't fit). And sometimes i don't see that i have changed at all. When i look in the mirror sometimes i still see the old me, the me that was over weight to the point of i didn't look like i had a neck. I don't recognize the person looking back at me sometimes. Although lots of people have said to me "you have lost so much weight! How did you do it?" The first time i realized that i really wasn't the fat girl any more was really two weeks ago when i took a pic with my daughter for the first time since i had surgery. Granted i cant fit in any of my old clothes but i do still try to wear them sometimes. I cant wear the pants clearly since i am in a size 11 now but i do still try to wear my old shirts size XXX L when really i can fit in a size XL and its loose. So why do i feel like i haven't lost anything? The mirror is my worst enemy. I have no full length mirrors in my house all my mirrors are boob up mirrors. I did that because i didnt want to see anything below that before and i really had no reason to as long as my shoes matched. I know that i have lost weight, but when i saw that it was like wow! I kinda feel like i have cheated myself like i just woke up one morning and the weight that i see in the mirror was gone. I saw the scales but i guess in my mind i just didn't want to believe it. I really hope that i am not the only one that is feeling this way. I want to be able to see what everyone else sees but im not sure that i can ever see that. I love wearing jeans that i can buy from jcp or the buckle or where ever i want and i love to be able to go in to any store and buy any shirt or under wear or bra that i want but i just want to see it for myself! Any ways im not saying that i am not happy that i am getting health im just saying why can i not see it? Please someone tell me that you are having the same problem, that its not just me and im not just crazy,

Thank you!

Awesome story! my mom had to force me into a size 16 she brought them over to my house and pretty much said put them on or else! So i walked out of my size 20 and slipped in to the size 16 then i missed the size 14 once i bought them a week later they where way to big and then it went from a 13 12 11 real fast. I love the story i would have done the same thing lol. Also i cant through away or give away a pair of my 20's or a pair of my old shorts i have to keep looking at them to make sure they are still loose.

Thank you karla your awesome!

On my journey the one thing that i can say is that its not my fault that i am loosing weight and your not! I have worked hard to be where i am right now and what have you done? Nothing but put me down! Ok let me explain please i have known lots of people like this, Before when i was big there where people that would talk to me but we were not friends. Now the same people think that its ok to pretend like i dont exist or they will talk bad about me say things like so and so's mom (and point at me) is on drugs and thats why she has lost so much weight. I have even had one parent that wouldnt let her child come and sit with us because of that little remark made by her daughter. Some people are just that dumb and we will just have to learn to deal with dumb people. I try just let it go because me and all the people that matter are happy for me but sometimes it just gets to me and i just want to show them my scars and say no i had WLS dumb A#$ but i dont i just let it go and worry about it later. well again im makeing this short i just wnanted to get that off my chest! have a wonderful day!

Your right and i don't have to explain myself if i don't want to like i have said before all the people that love me know the truth and that is all that matters and it is hard to give up all the foods that i used to love. But when i look at new and old pics that makes it worth it to me. I haven't changed the person that i am on the inside just who i am on the outside. some people just cant deal with that and i live in a very small town. There for if they don't know exactly what is going on they have to make up something or there is not gossip. And it sucks but im a better person then that.

I will tell any one any time about my band now but i dont think that i should have to explain my self to everyone all the time. I look good and although sometimes i still see the "big" girl in the mirror i know that i have lost lots of weight and i look nothing like a crack head lol. Its just hard sometimes to say hey im doing this to see my kids kids and to have my own children someday im doing this for me and to make a better life for me. I am happy and healthy and everything that happened to me because of all the weight i put on myself is gone i am really healthy for the first time in about six or seven years and im happy with that. I want to think all of yall for the support that yall have given me and ill try to write more tomorrow. thank you all for the kind words and for being so wonderful!

Ok im going to make this short and sweet because i had a four hour drive today and then a big basketball game that was a real nail bitter so i am a little sleepy. Any ways i kinda want to talk about sweets tonight. Ok now even though i have done really good with my lap band I still sometimes eat sweets. I still eat cookies and ice cream and very rarely do i ever eat candy but sometimes. I don't really like candy all that much. Any ways i have lost a total of 80 something pounds since i have been banded and i have eaten cookies and ice cream since the fourth month of my surgery. And guess what i am still loosing. i dont take it to any kind of an ext ream like i don't just eat and eat and eat. I control the amounts that i eat but i dont think that just because we have had lap band that we should just eat healthy food i do feel like its ok every so often that we can eat something like cookies or ice cream. Idk maybe i am wrong but i have told my doctor about my sweets eating and the nurse said that she has gone through the same kind of things. I know that we are not supposed to eat anything like that but i am still loosing so i dont see a probably. Ok now that i am off that little subject i also want to talk about loose skin real fast. Its driving me crazy!! I feel like i should look better but this loose skin is getting in my way. Dont get me wrong i dont have as much as some but i still have it and its still there and they tell me well you are 25 and it should go away. But will it ever go away??? OK like my legs everything is pretty much bone now but my inner thighs are gross nasty with loose skin! and its not going away no matter what i do and im not saying that you know i want it to go away so that i can wear the shorty shorts but i do have to watch what kind of shorts i get because of it. And sorry to say this but sometimes it gets in the way my special time with my husband and i just knowtist this like last week it has gotten really bad! and my arms they are getting bad too and it really doesn't matter what i do they are still like that. maybe someone can give me a little help on what to do about this any thing but surgery. Ok so that is pretty much all that i have to talk about tonight! Good night all.

Ok i know that i already posted a blog earlier but i cant help but to remember things that i want to talk about and didn't. Life with lap band isn't perfect and it wasn't meant to be its a tool just like a computer or a calculator is its there for help. It isnt there to just take the fat away while you do nothing its not an easy fix, now the reason i say this is because i can not count the number of time i have been told well isnt that cheating? And this is my answer "NO you dont understand i have a leave of control that wasn't there before. I have this tool to help me to not make bad choices and sometimes i do and then i realize by my own hard hardheadedness that maybe i shouldn't have done that. But again its nothing more then a tool". Then another question i have been ask is Why couldn't you have just done this on your own? This would be my Favorite question. And here is what i usually say " have you ever been on a diet and got stuck at one number and at the end of the day you just felt like it wasn't worth it any more? Well it was like that for me and i would give up or maybe you went on a diet but at the same time wanted a big plate of food and you just said screw it and ate whatever you wanted any ways and then gained weight and the whole thing just didn't seem to work for you? that is why i did it because i need control and i need a way that wont let me cheat and i need to feel like i can do something about the way that i look." Here is what the people who love you and care about you need to understand its all about you with lap band now i dont mean go and forget about others but you have to make your weight loss something that is yours. Something that you can control and something that is for you because if you dont want to do it then you wont. It has to be for you and yes there are other reasons mine was i wanted to go to a water park with my family and wear a swim suit nothing skanky just wear one again. i told my self that if i could get down to the 100s by Christmas we were going to great wolf lodge (its an indoor water park). I know i was banded in September and didnt give my self much time but for Christmas i was at that water park and i was in a swimming suit. Again nothing skanky and i wore shorts and a shirt but the good thing was that i didnt really have to and i damn sure didnt have to wear boys swim trunks and i didnt have to wear about ten undershirts. I was in a women swimming suit and i wasnt scared of well maybe i shouldnt wear this im too fat. i was 210lbs and that to me was so much better then 280. I have done things now that i would have never been able to do before. If i had never have done this for myself and done it for someone else i don't think that i would have stuck with it. I think it would have been like everything else that i had done before to try and get the weight off and yes before it was for someone else and it wasn't ever really for me. Some question will really get to you and might even make you think well should i really have done this? When i had this done i didn't want to let anyone know what i did i was scared that they would think i was cheating and that i had failed. But i realized that not to many people really think that not to many people are really that fast to judge you. However i have found some that are. See when you start to loose a lot of weight people what to know how, how you did it and what you are doing. And again at first these where not easy question to answer i mean how are you supposed to tell people that you have had weight loss surgery. For a while i thought well maybe i have cheated myself maybe i could have done this on my own and i didn't really need the lap band. But the truth was always there i needed some help i needed it and so i posted on Facebook what i did and just sat and waited. I waited to see what people would think of me now that they had the chance to ask me and find out what i had really done. and it turns out most of the feed back that i got wasn't bad it was mostly all good, and then there is the question here it is " was your husband going to leave you because you where so fat?" No my husband loved me for me not for what i looked like i mean he says that i am more fun now but he has always loved me. I get a look sometimes when i tell people that i have had lap band like ummm you did what? and sometimes its a pitty look like oh that poor girl she must have weighted 500lbs. But with time it gets easier to deal with all the questions all the bad look and you end up just smiling and knowing that you did what was right for you. And do be surprised when people act like you didn't know you were fat. LOL this is one of the questions i hate the most. " well what made you decide you were fat?" Im always like wtf! Do you really think that i didnt know i was fat? I looked im a mirror every day of my life. In fact i didnt decide i was fat i decided to get help for myself, because i wasn't doing a very good job on my own. Here is something else that i have learned people treat you different even some of your friends will treat you different. I mean people are nice but sometimes when someone sees you like a cable guy or something they will be nice but that's pretty much it. Example i had a cable guy come to my house to install internet for after my surgery. He was nice answered all my questions and did his job and left. two months ago i had to call them back because of some outside issues and the way i was treated was completely different he had a conversation with me and told me all kinds of things but when i was bigger he wouldn't say more then a few words to me at a time. People in stores treat you different to my husband thought i was joking until i told him to come in a store with me. One that him and i had been in when i was bigger and i had to ask for help and i had to get my own stuff they did very very little. But as soon as i walked in all of a sudden i had three people ask me what they could get for me and what size i needed. My husband has never questioned that again. When your big sometimes its hard for us to take up for our selves sometimes its like well whats the point? And i cant speek for any one else but i was like that for a long time after the surgery i didnt see the difference and i thought well if someone was to call me fat all i could do is cry and go home like i always do. Untill two weeks ago i didnt realize that i did look different that i wasnt really "fat" any more. but i was standing up to people who i would have never stood up to before, i got to a point where i wasn't going to let any one say anything about the way that i looked what my children where eating or anything and for the first time i stood up for my step son and it felt really good to do that for my child. That was another turning point were i thought wow i can do this and i didnt loose it i wasn't told to sit down and shut up and i wasn't called fat. LIfe after lap band isnt always fun and its not easy but i would say its more then worth it. And sometimes its crazy frustrating i mean who doesn't want a big burger from time to time or a big soda or just alot of crap all at once. But when you realize that you have the control and the will not to it all seems worth it. when your daughter comes up to you and throws her arms around you and says WOW MOM i can fit my arms around you like twice, then its all worth it. When you can do things with your husband that before just were not possible then its worth it. When you see a man from your past that put you down and told you, you where ugly and fat and couldn't been seen with you, and he says to you wow your so pretty and you can just sit and smile and tell him thank you or tell him he can go to hell which ever then you know that it was all worth it.

I have the same problem and right now its getting bad too. I have an iron problem also that worries me, pulse my last blood test i was low on b1 so i have to take a ton of that and when i remember to take it, it seems to help my energy levels i take b12 to lol when i remember try that it might help if your not already taking it. also it could help to talk to your doctor about this he might have something better to tell you. I hope you find something and when you do let me know!!

You have most of my same goals lol. Good luck i know that you can do it and i cut up my lane bryant credit card the second month after surgery. and i bought my first pair of girls shorts my third month good luck!!

Thank you everyone and i am really happy to know that i am not the only one that has gone through this stuff!