bluetigereyes

"You're only nineteen."
"You don't need to have surgery."
"Losing weight isn't impossible. If I can do it, anyone can."
"How is it even possible to not lose weight."  
Sometimes not everyone understands another's decisions. Which is totally rational. Not one person has gone through the same thing as another. In my eyes that gives no one person grounds to judge another person on their decisions.
 
I am nineteen. This is true. But what makes my surgery so much more taboo than another person's surgery? What makes my surgery different that a girl my age getting a boob job, or a nose job? I can't do something to benefit my health, and my over all apperance? To create something better for myself; No matter what the cost.
 
I understand why people believe I shouldn't get this surgery. I get it. I'm young. But the great thing is that I am having a procedure done, early on in my life, that will teach me about the lifestyle change I have to make. In order for me to live a healthy, happy life I believe that I need to have this done. Not only because I know I will be more confident, but I will be able to step away from being a prediabetic as well as my sleep apnea.
 
I used to dream, as a little girl, of what it would be like to feel pretty. To be comfortable. To walk around in my own skin and not feel like I was disgusting. Somedays I didn't want to leave the house. I felt repulsive. I felt like it would be better for the world, and myself if I just didn't go to class that day. No one would have to look at me, and I wouldn't have to look at everyone else...looking at me. For whatever reason. I know that this deicision is the best thing I could do for myself. I know that because I am young, I can change my whole life because of this. And I'm excited for it. I am excited for the new me. I deserve it.
 
My surgery date is October 10, 2012.
I am so unbelieveably excited to start my life.

I went to the doctor again yesterday for another fill. My last fill was at the beginning of April and with this fill I have been able to notice restriction finally. I have been feeling great and can really tell if I eat too fast or too much. I stepped on the scale at the doctor, and in 4 weeks, I'm down 7lbs. I am so happy with that. I know some people see much faster weight loss, but I am satisfied with how I am progressing. As long as I see the scale moving in the right direction, I will feel like a success. I have been TRYING to avoid stepping on the scale too often, but I have been trying to watch at least once a week to make sure I am on track. I feel so good about where I'm headed.
My roommate moved out a week ago, so I have my basement back and can finally start using my treadmill again, which I know will help too. Its been hard with all the rain to get out and walk too much, and I cant leave the kids home, so I havent been able to do as much as I want to. Now at least I can watch tv while walking on the treadmill.
I am walking a 5K in 2 weeks, so I would love to get prepared for that as well.

I went to the doctor again yesterday for another fill. My last fill was at the beginning of April and with this fill I have been able to notice restriction finally. I have been feeling great and can really tell if I eat too fast or too much. I stepped on the scale at the doctor, and in 4 weeks, I'm down 7lbs. I am so happy with that. I know some people see much faster weight loss, but I am satisfied with how I am progressing. As long as I see the scale moving in the right direction, I will feel like a success. I have been TRYING to avoid stepping on the scale too often, but I have been trying to watch at least once a week to make sure I am on track. I feel so good about where I'm headed.
My roommate moved out a week ago, so I have my basement back and can finally start using my treadmill again, which I know will help too. Its been hard with all the rain to get out and walk too much, and I cant leave the kids home, so I havent been able to do as much as I want to. Now at least I can watch tv while walking on the treadmill.
I am walking a 5K in 2 weeks, so I would love to get prepared for that as well.

I went to the doctor again yesterday for another fill. My last fill was at the beginning of April and with this fill I have been able to notice restriction finally. I have been feeling great and can really tell if I eat too fast or too much. I stepped on the scale at the doctor, and in 4 weeks, I'm down 7lbs. I am so happy with that. I know some people see much faster weight loss, but I am satisfied with how I am progressing. As long as I see the scale moving in the right direction, I will feel like a success. I have been TRYING to avoid stepping on the scale too often, but I have been trying to watch at least once a week to make sure I am on track. I feel so good about where I'm headed.
My roommate moved out a week ago, so I have my basement back and can finally start using my treadmill again, which I know will help too. Its been hard with all the rain to get out and walk too much, and I cant leave the kids home, so I havent been able to do as much as I want to. Now at least I can watch tv while walking on the treadmill.
I am walking a 5K in 2 weeks, so I would love to get prepared for that as well.

So, I'm now 1 week post "port revision" and feeling wonderful. The incision site had a bruise the size of my hand, which concerned me quite a bit, but after the bruising reached its max, it quickly started turning to yellow. Now it just itches like crazy! I had to take off the steri strips at 1 week because they were itching and irritating my skin, but the incision looks good.
I stepped on the scale this morning and was shocked to see that the 5lbs that I had gained, were GONE! YAY!!!!
My first fill gave me 6.5 cc in my band (holds 14cc) and I do feel a slight restriction, especially if I dont chew well enough or if its something starchy. In the mornings the band is tighter and I have been sticking to a protein shake for breakfast. By lunch time, I'm STARVING!!!
Last night was my neighbors birthday and he invited me to go to dinner with them. So, I ordered a 6oz steak, baked sweet potato, and applesauce. I ate about 2/3 of the sweet potato, most of the applesauce (it was about 1/4 cup), and 1/2 of my steak. This was the first time having steak since I got my band so I was very cautious. I cut the steak into small pieces and chewed really well. I did not have any issues with it getting stuck. I know I ate more than the standard with the band, but I have only had 1 fill so far. I go in on March 5th for my next fill and I hope to have more restriction at that point.
I feel great, seeing those 5lbs gone is a great motivator for me. Tonight I am going to my first ever Zumba class with a co-worker. I have NO rythem, so this should be interesting, but Ive heard its so much fun, I cant wait to get out there and shake my bootay, even if I do look like a fool while doing it. haha

Well I hope all my friends are doing well. I have spent the morning reading and trying to catch up on how everyone is progressing. I noticed I had not posted since November of last year: why, not sure. The holidays came and went with no major issues, I got a GI bug before Christmas and learned I could truly vomit after being banded and it was not a pleasant experience. I learned that even with a band Thanksgiving and Christmas can be very challanging holidays. Who does not enjoy the smell of fresh baked cookies and pies and lets not forget about that wonderful dinner with all the sides. My family was a little disappointed because I chose not to bake, but why tempt a former fat person. I may have learned alot over the past year but I still love food and I love the wonderful traditions that I have enjoyed since I was a child so I decided to let my daughter do the baking for the family, they live 4 and half hours away so they were not in my easy reach. Early in January I started to notice that I was not staying as satisfied between meals, I would eat my portions but I could usually down my portion in about 10 minutes. I knew this was not good but hated the idea of getting a fill. Any of you that have followed my blog know that I have not had but a few fills but my last one resulted in an overfill and an unfill before they got it right. Multiple sticks later I was back in the green zone again. Well I went to see my surgeon the second week of Jan and had my 3rd fill on Jan 30th. What an event, I had an esphogeal spasm when he pulled the fluid out of my band," it felt like an elephant was sitting on my chest." But I survived and the past week has been as fun as I remember, that is where Wow, it;s like starting over comes in. My first thought after this fill was, "Why can I not just learn to control my hunger so I don't have to go through this." 48 hours of clear liquids, than advance to soft than to solids. It has taken me 7 days to advance back to solids and it is really small amounts, about 2 ozs every 2-3 hours. I had to go back to the protein drinks to get all my protein in for a few days. I thought I might be too full, but I can pass liquids easily and solids if I chew them well. I think I had been a little more unrestricted than I thought for quite sometime and had become comfortable with managing my portions on my own. I lost 7 lbs last week but have finally leveled off maintained for the past few days, I am gradually adding solids back into my diet and cutting back on the protein drinks. So I guess this past week I have learned that this truly is a life long journey! Never give up and stay true to your self and you will be successful.....................

I have to say, I feel great! I am not having any issues. I went for my first post-op visit last week and was told that I can start my mushy stage this week. So, I'm looking forward to a little more solid foods. I do have to admit, I have cheated a couple times and had 'real' food with no issues. I was careful to chew extremely well and take small bites. Other than a little gas, I felt normal.
I am concerned since my appetite has returned. I am looking forward to my first fill. I know that I need the restriction in my band because the hunger can be oerwhelming at times. And a protein shake only lasts for about 4 hours before Im starving again. I know this is normal, and just take each day as it comes.
I'm happy with my progress and know that when I start getting my fills I will feel much better and not so hungry.
Thanks to all of you on this forum, its great to have people of all stages of this process to bounce ideas, comments, and suggestions off of. I have learned so much and appreciate you!

I just had my band placed on Thursday Dec. 22nd. I have never written in a blog before, so I figure this is a great time for new beginnings. I started my journey of getting the band on Oct. 23, 2011. At that time I weighed 273 lbs. I stared on the diet my dr gave me, and at the time of surgery, I weighed 251lbs. I am 5'3", so as you can imagine, this is something that I really needed to have done. I thought about having the surgery 3 years ago, but I do t think it was the right time for me. When I decided this time, everything seemed to fall into place and go so smoothly, it was almost surreal.
I now have my band and still thinking I'm going to wake up from the dream. Overall, I am feeling good. I do have some post op pain, but that's to be expected. I had the first 2 days of just clearliquids now this morning I'm trying a protein shake. It's sitting a little heavy, but I'm not feeling the intense hunger had this morning. I know there is no restriction I. The band yet, but I almost feel like there is. I'm sure it's just because of the swelling still, but it's a good feeling. I know this is the tool that's need to get to my goal. If you are just considering the band, this forum is a great help with people of all stages. It's been a great blessing to find this site. I will keep updating as I heal and share my experiences.

I just had my band placed on Thursday Dec. 22nd. I have never written in a blog before, so I figure this is a great time for new beginnings. I started my journey of getting the band on Oct. 23, 2011. At that time I weighed 273 lbs. I stared on the diet my dr gave me, and at the time of surgery, I weighed 251lbs. I am 5'3", so as you can imagine, this is something that I really needed to have done. I thought about having the surgery 3 years ago, but I do t think it was the right time for me. When I decided this time, everything seemed to fall into place and go so smoothly, it was almost surreal.
I now have my band and still thinking I'm going to wake up from the dream. Overall, I am feeling good. I do have some post op pain, but that's to be expected. I had the first 2 days of just clearliquids now this morning I'm trying a protein shake. It's sitting a little heavy, but I'm not feeling the intense hunger had this morning. I know there is no restriction I. The band yet, but I almost feel like there is. I'm sure it's just because of the swelling still, but it's a good feeling. I know this is the tool that's need to get to my goal. If you are just considering the band, this forum is a great help with people of all stages. It's been a great blessing to find this site. I will keep updating as I heal and share my experiences.