Hopeful Spirit

Me again, Chris. One more thing. Why don't you change your "Ticker" to something other than pumpkin Pies? Anything other than sweet food. That way you can start changing your mind. It is a small step process. I don't even want to think aobut pie right now. Later, maybe if I feel I can handle it. I hope I am not being too forward here. Please forgive me if you think that is the case. All good things, Phyllis , aka Hopeful Spirit

Hi Chris: \It is pretty funny that we both are experiencing the same "problems" with eating and asked the same questions, but I have received some TERRIFIC answers from people and I looked at your post and you did as well. There is a different way to know that you are full, and I am using all the advice I have received and working on fine-tuning my method of knowing when I have had enough PHYSICALLY! Physically is the operative word here. To work out what I want to eat EMOTIONALLY is a totally different subject and needs to be handled on emotional terms. NOT EASY to do. Believe me, I know all about it, but I am on the journey to work it out and I hope you can join me and the many others on this forum who managed to also work it out. A hugh undertaking, but well worth it. The first thing I did after posting my request for help here is to set specific times when I eat so I don't graze. This hasn't been that difficult to do because I have been keeping busy in between times. That is also important. That way I don't think about food until I eat my meal. I drink lots of Water in between. And I try to change my priorities to look for value in other things besides food, and things like that. I am also eating foods like fish which have a lot of Protein and little fat and if cooked properly, is pretty moist. I make a little tarter sauce with low fat mayo and relish and put a little bit (tiny bit) in a small bowl with a small amout of fish (I have cod today) and mix it up and eat it. I happen to love fish, so I guess I am lucky, but for now, it is something I can work on. The biggest problem I have, like you, is loving the taste and wanting to eat more than I can. But, besides becoming very uncomfortable, I know it will lead to weight gain in the future and I have to force myself to put controls on myself. So I also just put about 2 oz of whatever (now it is fish) in my tiny plate and sit down and eat it as slowly as possible. I don't get up to have more until I have stopped eating for at least 10 minutes. This is hard to do, but I am getting better at it. I also just recommended a book to Shea, above, and I will recommend it to you as well. I have found it very helpful with helpful tools. The WeightLoss Surgery Workbood, by Doreen Samelson, EdD, MSCP. There you can find different strategies for controling emotional eating. Good luck and let's keep in touch! Phyllis, aka Hopeful Spirit

Dear Shae: I so totally appreciate your entry here and admire your courage to face your past traumatic family situation of food deprivation as you struggle with changing those early patterns that hold such a firm part in our minds. Perhaps a start is just consciously reminding yourself and even looking at the extra food you may have in the house every time before you take a bite. You can always go back if you are really hungry. But I know this is easier said than done. Although different from yours, I also have my "demons from my early childhood" which interfere with my desire to only eat until I am physically satisfied. I was sexually abused as a child and have it "set in my mind" that I have to overeat to feel pleasure and be fat to protect myself. Of course, that isn't the case now, but I, like you, have to have the courage to confront those deeply set ideas to change them. Becasue my life is different now and there are other ways to find comfort and protect myself. The problem is that it isn't easy to learn those "other ways" but I am determined to do that. And for you, learning ways to convince yourself that you are no longer deprived and that food will be available when you need it, will also be a difficult journey. I think may people on this forum deal with similar issues, so you are not alone. I found a very good workbook, "The Food and Feelings Workbook, A Full Course Meal on Emotional Health by Karen Koenig, LCSW, M.Ed. This really helped me identify my feelings when it comes to food. Maybe it can help you too. You can get it on Amazon.com. Another good book is The WeightLoss Surgery Workbook, by Doreen Samelson, EdD,.MSCP. This book also has some good tools for "emotional eating." I am also lucky to be seing a therapist to help me through this "new" stage of my life where I need to find new forms of pleasure (I know they are out there!!) and new ways to protect myself without being fat! Good luck to you and may your journey be blessed! Phyllis, aka, Hopeful Spirit

Thank you all for your understanding and advice. It is really important to know the experience of others at a time like this. This is such an opportunity to learn how to eat properly. Thank you again.

Go to the emergency room of a hospital and get it checked out NOW. They can tell you if you had a stroke and they have meds that can help a lot if they get to you quickly. Please don't delay. I am very serious. I truly hope this isn't anything serious, but it definitely could be, and I am only being a little tough because I care, Good luck, Phyllis, aka Hopeful Spirit

Hi everyone: I am 3 weeks post op and just starting eating soft, moist and very tiny pieces of Protein. Veggies and fruit will be added next week on my program. I have been chewing and chewing but there are some more pureed types of food that go down faster, like yogurt, cottage cheese, humus, etc. I am one of those people who does get hungry (both head hunger and real hunger) and I am really trying to pay attention to my body and STOP EATING WHEN SATISFIED, OR FULL. The problem is I can seem to figure out when that is. I am also one of the people who have not changed my taste for the favorite foods I love (except asperteine-flavored beverages). Last night I got into a scary spot because I was reminded of my old compulsive eating habits. This was the first time it happened since surgery. I was eating humus, and loving the taste so much. It also seemed to go down smoothly. I was probably slipping into an "unconsious" eating stage and ate too much too quickly because it tasted so good. I finally stopped when I began to feel sick, like if I put ONE MORE tiny spoon-full in my mouth, I would vomit! This scared me, becasue it was the first time it happened. I didn't vomit, but just felt sick for an hour or so until it passed over. I don't want to fall into my old patterns, but don't know how to tell I am full so I can stop and not OVEREAT. Does anyone have experience with this and have any advice. What does it feel like to you when you are full and satisfied. Help is sorely needed. Thank you so much, Phyllis, aka, Hopeful Spirit

Hi Sandy and congratulations to getting to the other side. There will be a lot of "pains" which may seem like hunger, and may or may not be, but you can always have your Protein drinks, sipping very slowly, and that will help. DON'T eat anything now! Take your time and don't do anything crazy. You WILL LOSE WEIGHT, but it is a little disappointing sometimes after you return from the hospital and the scale doesn't seem to be moving. It is because they fill you up to the brim with fluids in the hospital and it takes a little while for you to lose that extra Fluid weight. I was weighed at 298 a couple of days before I went into the hospital for surgery, and when I came home, 2 days after surgery, I weighed 295. I was disappointed. Only THREE pounds after all of this with litterally NO eating for several days!! But I read this forum and learned about the "hospital fluid thing" and found out that people GAINED weight in the hospital. I was also supported by forum friends. Then, after a few more days the weight started to FLY off. For a few days, I was losing 3 pounds a day, then 2 pounds a day, etc. and now, after 19 days post surgery, I am at 269 which is 29 pounds lost since surgery. So, hang in there. Drink those Protein shakes -- the protein will definitely help with the hunger if you really are hungry, sip really slowly and I promise you the WEIGHT WILL COME OFF. Your Boston friend, Phyllis, aka, Hopeful Spirit

Hi Hibblesmom! Oh, yes, I have had experience with lactose intollerance. Didn't have it before surgery -- never had it in my life -- but after surgery (2 weeks ago today -- I had diarrhea every day. So Hello Lactose Intollerance. I changed to Silk Soymilk (vanilla flavored) or Whole Foods Lite Soymilk or Lactaide for the milk part of the Protein shake and whey Protein ISOLATE (purchased at Whole Foods) for the protein powder. That particular Whey Protein Isolate is 99.9% Lactose Free. The key word is "Isolate". Unfortunately it is more expensive that Whey Protein by itself, but I needed to buy it. Also, I had to give up Greek yogurt and go to Soy yogurt, which I don't really care for, except the Silk Brand. Remember that most yogurt is made out of milk products and has lactose. By using the lactose free products, I seem to have stopped the diarrhea which is a good thing. The Lactaid "milk" isn't bad. I haven't tried the lactose "pills" you can take before you drink products with lactose in thiem, but I think I will buy some today. Our guidelines here in Boston at Mass General Hospital is less than 25g sugar per serving, and no more than 25g protein per serving. But I have learned from this forum that each hospital and program are different. As for the "Clear Liquids" we can use Water. Propel Vitamin Water, Fruit 2O, V8 juice, bouillion. Good luck! Phyllis, aka Hopeful Spirit

Hi Sandy, my Sommerville friend! I will be thinking of you tomorrow morning. I also had the first surgery, early in the morning and even though I didn't like getting up at 4 am to get to the hospital at 6 am, I was really to get it over with early rather than later. That way you are in your room by early afternoon. Sorry to hear that you have to spend your "clear liquid day" collecting candy with your son, but it is what it is. Just keep that Water bottle at your side at all times and keep sipping. I found that I drank a lot of fruit2O and Propel flavored water on my "liquid day". The artificial sweetness helped. This is interesting because now, after surgery, I don't care for it, and much prefer unsweetenend beverages. Keep your eye on the prize (!!) and all good luck for a smooth recovery. Let's get together when you are up to it. I am only across the river! Phyllis, aka Hopeful Spirit

Gunning, 2005. Sorry to hear about the plumbing problem. If it isn't one thing it is another. If the collace doesn't work after 2 weeks, our program at MGH here in Boston suggests a little bit of Milk of Magnesia. That may do it. Keep up the good work!! Phyllis

Welcome home, JP! Sorry to hear about your rough start, but it will get better every day. All good hopes for a speedy recovery and lots of weight lost!! Phyllis, aka Hopeful Spirit

Hi Leah, my October 17 Sleeve Sister!! Sounds like your post surgery experience was very difficult which I am really sorry to hear. But it also sounds like things are getting slightly better every day, which is good. Hold on to the thought of your progress, and also hold on to the support of your husband which sounds like it is good. You will make it through this. I can say a little bit about diarrhea since I have had it since I left the hospital on 10/19. It has really worn me out, and at first I thought it was normal -- you know liquids in and liquids out -- but I finally took this problem to my doctor. She thought it was lactose intollerance and told me that it was very common after all GI surgery. I was, indeed, using a lot of milk products for my liquid Protein, so I have had to change over to soy-based Protein powder and soy milk and Lactaid. Apparantly it takes about a week to improve, but I have noticed an improved difference. This doesn't happen after I take my medication like it happens to you, and if you only have it ast that time, and no other time, you may have a totally different situation from lactose intolerance. I just thought I would tell you my experience if it may help you. I have even more experience with anxiety than I do with diarrhea , and if medication helps, it is good. It doesn't mean you have to take it forever. You are going through a difficult time. Everyone responds to things differently. You had major surgery, and this is how you respond to your particular circumstances. That is totally okay. It also sounds like the medication is working in that you were able to leave your house for the first time since surgery and do the awsome motherly task of getting your son ready for Halloween!! Yippee!! And, by the way, you are doing much better than me in the exercise department!! 10 min at a time on the treadmill. I have to admit that I have trouble walking 10 min at a time. So hang in there. You should be losing some weight by now, aren't you? That should make you feel good!! All good things to come for you, my dear, Phyllis, aka Hopeful Spirit

Hi Bonnie! I have been thinking about you all week and am happy you are home and getting on with your recovery. I am so sorry to hear about the "extra procedures" during surgery which held up your recovery. Sounds like you had a rough start. But in one way, it may be better that they found the lesion on your liver and removed it so that there would be no chance that it would turn cancerous at a later time in life. And the repair of your hernia is a positive as well. My diet for three weeks is almost as restrictive as yours. I am totally on liquids -- clear (at least 24 oz) and protein-type liquids (at least 24 oz) like Protein shakes, yogurt, diet pudding made with skim milk, soy milk -- for 2 1/2 weeks before I get the mushy diet. I have to admit I am getting sick of Protein drinks, and the work of it for me is that I have developed lactose intollerance so everything is now soy or vegetable based. But I like soy milk and found a soy based Protein powder, so I am doing that now. Hang in there and may your journey get easier every day. Love from Phyllis, aka Hopeful Spirit