learningtoluvme

My surgery was July 20 and I have only lost 9 lbs. I have my first fill tomorrow 8/15 so hoopefully something will change! Im ready to see results! Right now, I feel hungry a lot and I feel like I am able to eat too much!! Anyone have that same feeling almost a month after their surgery????

Praying for you. You are a REAL woman. REAL women feel, hurt, laugh, cry, gain/lose weight.
Hoping you can be strong and do what your heart says to do. You deserve more than emotional abuse. Hugs.

The easy way out, really? He really is clueless about the entire process! And..IF it were the "easy way out" so what? I mean what the heck is wrong with that? Is taking a car to work the easy way out, instead of walking? Is going food shopping the easy way out, intead of growing your own food? Is using a dishwasher the easy way out-I mean why does life have to be a struggle anyway?
He talks to you about what "real women" do....well real men don't put down their wives, real men don't make their wives cry, and real men are supportive of their mates.
I agree, you need to get yourself in counseling so you can get some perspective on your situation. You deserve to be treated with love and dignity.
After seeing a counselor, please get some legal advise...just in case. During my first marriage my ex cleared out all the bank accounts. Think smart-have a plan-my credit rating was ruined after my divorce. Perhaps a trial seperation might work for you both. Talk to a counseler and talk to a lawyer. Like I said girl, you deserve so much more in your life.

learning to luv.....you have to make your own decisions in the status of your relationship. That in and of itself is a hard one. The band is a process and is by no means an easy way out. You will have to work it everyday and as you learn yourself what your "food / habits in eating" are you will have to identify them and modify your behavior and this will go on for the rest of your life as it is easy to fall back into our old routines of eating.
REal women? what would he know? He does not feel your pain, or your angst, and perhaps your fear of not living long enough to be there for your children.
The good news for you is that your children are old enough to take care of themselves and to assist you if need be. There are bandsters here that have been banded and their children are small. Selfish? OH, yeah, we are all a bunch of selfish band of people because we would like to live a healthier life and be able to be there for our families and yes, ourselves.
You might want to consider counseling for yourself to assist you through this difficult time. Do not let your hubby sabotage you in this process. As you start to lose the weight you will start to feel better and better. If your weight loss is slow...so what you are still losing and punds on the scale is not the lone indicator that you are losing. Your body will reshape.
You do need to get moving. Walking is good aim for 30 minutes a day. This will also aid in the healing process, apply a heating pad to your stomach when you sit or lay down.
I cannot say where your marriage will go or what the end result will be, but you do have the power to get back on your feet and decide where it is you want to be.
Learn to forgive yourself and never stop believing in yourself.
I wish you much strength as you go through this phase and it is only a phase, happiness and health!

Wow my heart goes out to you. To me it sounds like your husband has the problem not you. It might be fear that when you loose weight that YOU will not need HIM! Tell us is he over weight at all? If you can You need a support group see if your Dr has one that you might be able to go to.
Please keep in remember that you are doing this for you. You have taken a big step in life in getting well and fit. Keep working on yourself as YOU ARE WORTH IT.
Take care of YOU! I will be thinking of you. Stay well stay safe god bless you.
Mary

I suggest counseling for you both. He needs to know that his comments are hurtful and his comments are bringing you down. You have children together and have been married for a long time-try counseling or at the very least have a one to one talk to him letting him know how you feel tell him this will have to change immediately because it's emotionally destroying the love you have for him. If he is unresponsive or simply doesn't seem to care then you need to decide if this is the life you want.
I wish you the best!

That is emotional verbal mental abuse which really gets under my skin. So just to be safe I will comment later when I calm Down!

This may help you in understanding the restrictive mechanism of a Lap-Band.
The ALLERGAN protocol for Lap-Band fills calls for a six-week delay after surgery, prior to any fills. The purpose for the six-week delay is for the patient’s stomach to heal from the surgery, as well as allowing time for the Lap-Band to “Seat” or “Nestle” into the fat pad between the stomach wall and the interior wall of the Lap-Band.
Prior to receiving an EFFECTIVE fill, it is VERY uncommon to have any restriction from a Lap-Band. Some patients will NOT lose weight, or may even GAIN weight until they have received an effective fill in their Lap-Band.
Normal weight loss with a properly restricted Lap-Band is between 1 and 2 pounds per week.
The normal cycle of fills, restriction and weight loss is as follows:
1. The patient's Lap-Band constricts when the patient receives a fill. Swelling for a few days after receiving a fill is very common. Many doctors require a patient to go on a liquid diet for a day or two after receiving a fill. A fill may have a “Delayed Action” of up to 4 weeks. A “Delayed-Action” means that the fill may not become effective for up to 4 weeks after the fill. That is why the ALLERGAN protocol states that fills should not be performed on patients who will not have access to medical care for at least two weeks after a fill.
2. The patient's stomach capacity is lessened as a result of the restriction caused by the Lap-Band.
3. The patient loses weight because they cannot eat as much food.
4. The residual fat-pad between the inside of the Lap-Band and the outside of the patient's stomach reduces in size because of the overall weight loss in the patient.
5. The reduction of the residual fat-pad causes the Lap-Band to become loose again.
6. At that point, the patient needs another fill, because the Lap-Band is loose, and the patient has a loss of restriction, which allows the patient to eat larger amounts of food.< /span>
7. The patient receives another fill and the process starts all over again.
Most Lap-Band patients receive several fills to adjust the Lap-Band as their weight loss progresses, and there is less and less residual fat-pad between the inside of the Lap-Band and the exterior of the stomach wall. Once a patient has lost all of their residual fat-pad, fills become less common. As the Lap-Band patient progresses in their weight loss, the effect of very tiny fills (Less than .2ccs) becomes greater and greater.
It is not uncommon for a late-stage Lap-Band patient to experience a significant difference in restriction with as little as .05cc of fill.

sorry you don't have a good support system....that stinks that your husband is being nasty....try to stay positive and know that you have the love and support of people on this board.....i hope you're feeling a bit better tonight....if you ever need someone to talk too, i'd love too....keep me posted on your success:)))))
Kim

Good luck 2 both of u guys! U will be fine, the first fews days r a lil diffucult but u can do it! I would never think a week after surgery I felt 100% better!!!

I FINALLY got my surgery date! August 4th!!!!! I am so excited! I feel like it's a long ways away!
Who else is getting banded in August?

My surgery date is Aug 18th I am so excited. Also worried I have some new jobs that I didnt plan for. I hope I can get back to work ASAP.

I got my insurance approval and surgery date is August 12--I can hardly wait!

Hey Banders!!! I'm on day 3 of Opti fast, it's okay maybe I thought it was going to be sooo bad it's actually better. Last night while kids sat for diner I had chicken boillion, it was sooo Delish lol I never had just a bullion cube before and it tasted amazing. My dad came over with of all things pizza for my daughter, he is the best dad/ grandfather but a complete enabler and growing up in an Italian family where we had several kinds of bread at all times didn't help my eating habits. So back to the pizza, I go to warm it up, smell it, okay I took a bite.... Then spit it out! Major victory for me!!!
Wishing all the other Aug banders well!!! Tmrw is August and we start, see many of you Post Op!!! Stay strong!!!