LUCYCAT

OBESITY SURVEY 2.rtf

I weighed in this morning at 192. That gives me a gain of 1 pound since last weeks weigh in. I have been on vacation and with the Holiday season..typically I would have gained 10 pounds this week of the year. I will take it as a Christmas miracle that I only gained one. Now...to get back on track for the new year....

Thank you all for your willingness to help. I am 5 months out and I have noticed drastic differences in the way I am treated now vs the way I was treated before. I was curious if anyone else had encountered the same issues. I will be sending out the questionnaires soon. It does not matter to me how far along you are on your journey, I would be glad to include your data in my research and send everyone a copy of the final paper. This is just a small college research paper- but perhaps it will at least be interesting reading given the data will come from people like us. I will not use anyone's name. I also will not include your questionnaire in the final paper that is sent to everyone. If I quote you in the paper- I will give you a fake name. Thanks again for your help...and anyone else that would like to join please let me know.

Hi- whenever I try to join a group I get the following error: VerticalSleeveTalk Message Invalid Link: The security key for this page is invalid Retun to this Group's Home What am I doing wrong?

Oh yeah. It gets much better. My stomach growled and rumbled from the time I was being wheeled from the recovery room until two weeks after my surgery. It would growl so loud that I couldn’t sleep because it wouldn’t stop. I tried some Gas-x strips that dissolve in your mouth. That helped. I also found the more I walked the better I felt. I literally spent the first two weeks after my surgery pacing the floor and sleeping 2 hours at a time. Before I had surgery I had made friends with a woman that had hers done way before me. She was sprawled out on the beach on day 3 talking about how easy the surgery was and how she felt like she hadn’t even had anything done. By my day 3 I told her if I were feeling better- I would kick her butt. I had a bit of buyer’s remorse the first few days. Honestly I struggled the first 5 weeks. I just couldn’t hit those Water and Protein goals. It does get better. It gets so much better. I am 21 weeks out. It has been the best decision I have ever made in my entire life. My only regret is that I didn’t do it sooner. Hang in there- it will get better.

I weighed in at 193 this morning. That gives me a two pound loss for this week. That is a total of 67lbs since the start of the year, and 52 pounds since surgery. Merry Christmas everybody!

“You have such a pretty face….if only you would lose weight.” I’ve been overweight my entire life. From the time I was a baby until now. My other overweight friends would complain bitterly about being told they had a pretty face, if only they could lose weight. I noticed no one ever told me that. I chalked it up to the fact that I have a rather unusual personality. People as a general rule do not make observations about my appearance. I have thought perhaps a life time of being overweight has made me a bit prickly and intimidating to my fellow humans. I’ve lost 50 pounds since my surgery. 65 since the start of the year. I have discovered the more weight I lose the bigger my nose gets. It is funny; I never noticed the giant Italian snozz that graced my face when I was 260lbs. I have come to the saddened conclusion that people didn’t tell me I had “such a pretty face”….not because of my personality type…but because I really do not have a pretty face. I am honestly not sure which is worse. To be a total “B” that people fear- or to just be not very attractive. The good news is I have bought a pair of size 12 low rise jeans. They are made for someone much younger than me…but I have to admit my butt looks fabulous. Whenever I catch a man looking at me these days…I have this almost overwhelming urge to yell out- “Wait- don’t look at my face!! Look at my butt! Look at my butt!”

The smallest I have ever been in my adult life was 180. When I weighed 180-185 I had a wonderful green jacket that matched my eyes and looked really good on me. I have dreamed about wearing that green jacket to our office Christmas party ever since I transferred to the department. Once a year everyone in the southern half of the state gets together for an office Christmas party. There are about 70 people at the party- and this is the only time a year we see each other. When I first moved to this work group I weighed 215. The last time they saw me I was 240. I gained up to 260- but that was the year I took the vacation day so I wouldn't have to go. I have dreamed about being able to wear that green jacket to our Christmas party for 8 years. The party is next week. I am 10 pounds short. I am losing 1-2 pounds a week now. I know there is no way I will be able to make it. It crushes me that for the first time in years I am soooo close. And to JUST MISS my goal. I keep trying to cheer myself up by saying NEXT CHRISTMAS THAT SIZE 14 GREEN JACKET WILL BE TOO BIG. But honestly, it isn't helping much. I am half tempted to go out and buy something new. I haven't bought anything new since before my surgery. I had so many old clothes I could lose back into.

I guessed. The chart at my surgeons office said the most I could weigh at my height and be in a "healthy" range was 145. So I picked 150. In reality- I can not imagine hitting 150. I weighted 150 in the 7th grade. I would love to get back to 180- that is the lowest weight I have been in my adult life.

DOWN 4LBS THIS WEEK. I AM 200LBS!!! WOOOHOOOO...SOOOO CLOSE TO BREAKING 200!

Last week was the first week that I hadn't lost a pound since my surgery. I freaked out a little, I don't mind telling you. I went back to the basics this past week. I made a very serious effort to get the correct amount of protein and water. I also managed to walk every day. I weighed in this morning at 204. I lost 3lbs last week. Yayyy. That gives me a total loss of 41 pounds since surgery and 56 pounds since the start of the year. No one at work has said a single word to me. I am honestly not sure that they notice. I haven't bought any new clothes. I have old clothes from years gone by that I am wearing. Some of this stuff I haven't been able to fit into in years. That part is exciting. My hair is falling out at an alarming rate. My part keeps getting wider and wider. I have tried to part it on a different side or at a different angle...but the result seems to be the same. I am tired. All the time I am tired. My company cut out all overtime. I was hoping that it was simply that I was working too much. But last week was my first week with no overtime in months- and I am still utterly exhausted. I seriously need to work on toning. I have lost a lot of muscle mass. Everything I have now is soft. That aint good. I am a little sad that I am not going to get to break 200 by Halloween. But I am thrilled that I am going to come fairly close. I will try and continue to stay to the basics- and work some new exercises in.

I am only 45 days in....I have lost 30 pounds. I am off of the 3 blood pressure meds a day that I used to take. And a week ago- I RAN down some woman's cart in the Walmart parking lot. It escaped her- and was tearing down the parking lot looking for something to crash into. I Ran it down and caught it before it could do any damage. I haven't RUN anywhere in over 10 years. I exercise every day. And not because I have to. I do it because I enjoy it so much- it is the best part of my day.

I lost another 4 lbs this week. 22 pounds since my surgery. 37 pounds since the start of the year. I can wear clothes now that I haven't worn in ages. It is nice to have so many clothing options. I have been hitting my protein goals every day. I usually hit or come close to hitting my water goals. I exercise every single day. Sometimes twice a day. Of course, that exercise is just walking swiftly. I am hoping the doc releases me a week early on the serious exercise. I don't see walking getting me much further. I have been struggling with depression. Not because I regret what I have done. Not because I miss food or feel left out. Well, I am not sure why I feel this way. It is an odd hopeless feeling. I don't get excited about fitting into my old clothes. I don't get excited about the idea of losing more weight. I am just kind of going through the motions. I had read that depression could be an issue for WLS patients. I am hoping this passes quickly.

I can’t believe it is finally here. After months of patiently crossing items off of my to do list, psychological evaluation, PCP meetings, Dietitian meetings, blood work, ekgs. The list was endless. I am here. This afternoon my mom and I will make the 2 hour trip to the city where I will have my surgery. I have to be at the hospital at 8am and they should start cutting on me at 9. Maybe it’s cold feet- or perhaps pre-surgery jitters. I find that I am not as excited as I thought I would be. I find that I worry. I worry that I am at least an hour away from any medical facility that knows squat about VSG. Our local healthcare is a joke. I worry that I will have complications, and have nowhere to go…and no one to take me. It will be fine. I am sure of it. My surgeon does bariatric surgery exclusively. He has done hundreds if not thousands of VSG surgeries. He seemed to think that mine was going to be ultra easy. I hope he is right. I am nervous. I worry about my mom. She isn’t in the best of health herself. And she gets lost easy. I worry that she will get lost in the city. I worry that she wont eat or take her meds right and she will crash again. I worry more about her than I do about me. I cannot wait until this is over.

It is amazing how much can happen in the span of 44 days. One moment my boyfriend was telling me how much he loved me and appreciated me. 5 days later he broke up with me because he said we didn’t have a “spark”. Whatever the hell that means. I think he was intimidated by my upcoming surgery. He never wanted to talk about it, and seemed to be trying to talk me out of it. I finished up the last doctor appointment. I received precertification from the insurance company. I have an education class on July 27th. I have a preop appointment on July 29th. And my surgery is scheduled for August the 1st I have cans of protein shakes lined up in my bedroom. Today, on the advice of my dietitian I went ahead and made low fat chicken salad, turkey salad, tuna salad and green beans. I pureed them in the food processor and then put them in ice cube trays and froze them. Then wrapped them individually and put them in freezer bags. Yes it was every bit as completely and utterly disgusting as it sounds. The green beans were my favorite. A can of green beans with some onions and chicken broth mixed together and then pulverized in the food processor. It looked like vomit. The sort of vomit that would spew from someone possessed by Satan himself. I am counting down the days. Unfortunately my ex-boyfriend’s tragic timing has left me high and dry. My mother will pinch hit for him. She is taking me the 2hour trip up to the city to have the surgery done, and will cart me back home when it is over. She isn’t in the best of health herself and I hate like mad that she has to do this for me. Donna and Frankie both offered to take me- but I guess I will just stick with mom. She seems to be excited about the idea. I am fighting like mad to find some human that I can throw money at who will mow my stupid yard. My mower died last weekend and it’s a jungle out there. I had sort of convinced myself that I could mow it myself after surgery. Perhaps this is God’s way of saving me from myself. Just like my laptop giving up the ghost on the very day I got dumped. In reality it probably saved me from some well, shall we say drunk emailing. Isn’t technology grand? The registration and inspection on my car expire this month. I have taken the Thursday off between my appointments and plan to do an adult responsibility day. I will take care of them, and get my hair cut before sugery. I loved my boyfriend very much, and I miss him far more than I care to admit. But part of me is relieved to have this time to take care of me. Our relationship was very much about me being there to take care of him. It will be nice to focus on myself for the first time in what feels like forever. Who knows who I will be a year from now? Of course there is this tiny voice of dread in the back of my head that worries I will be the only person in the free world that bariatric surgery will NOT work for.