ravendays

Im a Mother, a Wife, a Daughter, a Sister, and a Friend. I love deep, care strongly, and fight hard for my family, friends, and my beliefs. I know who I am and Im okay with my faults as well as my strengths. All I can do is be me. Love & be loved.

That said, I'm also obesed. I am 28 yrs old, have gone threw 3 pregnancies 3 yrs in a row (back to back) and 1st pregnancy was when I was 18 yrs old. I have no idea what my "normal" body weight would be as an adult because since I had my 1st child, I have either been preggos and then finally just wasnt able to play catch up to get weight off. I now weight more then I ever did threw any of my pregnancies. I have about 80 lbs to be healthy weight. I have tried WW with 5-6 day wk self training at gym willing eating right and lost 20 lbs. I quit smoking. Gained 30 lbs topping me at my heaviest in all my life. I started smoking went back on diet & excersise and lost 30 lbs...then gained it back.

The day I scheduled my lap band surgery I weighed myself, cried and realized...my self esteem isnt low anymore, its gone. I'm that angry fat girl. I'm miserable in my own body like a prisoner and I need more then a come to Jesus talk to get me back into it again...I need a tool. So I called, im scheduled for banding on the 1/30/11...