My boss (a fabulous, supportive, amazing woman - if you haven't picked up on that in my posts on other areas of this site) and I were talking today about changes in my life pre- and post-Lap Band.

It's been two years this month that my Daddy died of complications from years of untreated type II diabetes. This is not to say we didn't know he had it.... he just did the minimum to take care of it for the twenty years or so he was diagnosed. It took its toll and, at the very young age of 64, with congestive heart failure and multiple strokes and MIs under his belt - including two open-heart surgeries for quad bypass and valve replacement - he died.

The intricacies of all of that are for another blog, if I decide to let you in that far, but this does have bearing on this post.

All my life, I was heavy. My parents are/were heavy, two of my three siblings are heavy, various extended family are heavy. It was something we were, totally acceptable, and totally oblivious as to what it would mean later in life (for those of us lucky enough to have a "later in life"). We ate what we wanted without a care in the world, blindly following every fad diet imaginable when the mood struck us to lose 100lbs overnight... you get the idea.

Being that way, and being surrounded by people in the same situation made it easy to hide from life. I still enjoyed life, as a kid, a young adult, and now a thirty-something, but something was always missing: Freedom.

This is what the boss and I were discussing: a newfound freedom borne of a normal-sized body in a normal-sized life.

Why do we call it Freedom? I missed out on the freedom to run around and do what I really wanted to do because, quite frankly, I didn't fit into normal life:

• We asked for tables at restaurants because we didn't have the freedom to sit where we pleased; we didn't fit comfortably into a booth.
  
• We didn't go on roller coasters because we didn't fit into the cars and/or safety belts
  
• We chose bigger cars because what we really want - in my case, a Mini - wouldn't fit our happy asses comfortably and we looked ridiculous driving them around
  
• We didn't have the freedom to buy clothes we liked because we had to buy clothes that fit our expansive waistlines
  
• We avoided stairs, walking festivals, and anything resembling an outdoor/exercise activity because of how we looked or how it affected us after only a short while
  
• We ate what everyone else ate, regardless of its nutritional value (or lack thereof) because we didn't have the freedom (or so we thought) to make different choices; we were enslaved to justification, eating with the masses
  

Last Friday, my assistant and I went shopping. I went into a normal-sized store and purchased normal-sized clothing off the normal-sized rack. No "W" after the size, no special department, no special cut to hide my abnormal size or shape.

I found Freedom through choice rather than a forced necessity.

Can I just simply say WOW!!!

You have just put a lot of things in perspective.

Thank you for the "light".

Congrats on the weight loss!

OMG! You have opened my eyes to a wonderful word "FREEDOM". I so want FREEDOM, I need FREEDOM, I deserve to have FREEDOM! Thank you for your post!

Cristina

Wow, thanks for the great response. I am glad you liked it, and I am glad it meant something to you, too. =)

Felicia