Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!
  • entries
    2
  • comments
    8
  • views
    707

Lost A Man, Gaining A New Life, All In Divine Order.

Peace36love

375 views

Greetings to all you out there,

 

Michele here, and I guess I wanted to share some of my personal journey with you all. My heart is somewhat heavy but I am finding joy and excitement in this process just the same.

I have been praying for change, feels like all of my life, but I think I really got clear last year on the change I wanted to see. I was in a relationship with a man who was kind, gentle, quiet, and much older than me. We got along O.K. but I knew in my heart we where not the best for each other. Quite a few things was wrong in our relationship, but one of the main issues was we saw life quite differently. He cares very little about his health, and that's all I care about, my health. Like I said before I prayed for change and it wasn't long before the Universe had the ball rolling, to make a long story short we broke up in December 2011.

In my mind however, I thought we had a chance of reconciliation, not wanting to let go and Let God, I continued to hold on to that hope, and even after I had decied to go through with this life changing procedure, I still wanted to hold on to the old me and my old life and my old way of doing things.

As of August 2012, he has officially started another relationship. At first I was very hurt, as turbulent as things where, he was still my best friend, and I had grown to be very dependent on his emotional support, but now is the time for me to move forward by myself.

I realized it was all in Divine order. It was so fitting that he find someone new one month before my surgery, so we both can break this emotional tie we have to each other, especially me. The weight challenge has been mine, and I think relationship issues, in some form or fashion have played a role in this struggle. I really don't like being by myself, and it took me a while to figure out the difference in being by myself, and being alone *vs* being lonely.

The Universe is now giving me what I want, a change in my life for the better, a fresh start at a healthy lifestyle and an active life. All old must be removed for the new to enter. I wish him only the best, I am forever grateful for the time (6 years) we had together. I send all the Love, Peace and Blessings to him and his new Love, and I am so grateful for the new Love that I am moving forward with ....Me.



7 Comments


Recommended Comments

*hugs*

not easy but I do think the timing is beautiful. The season with him in it came and went. This journey is a deeply personal one in which your faith is going to bring you through. A new season will come bringing the right person with it

Right now this is your time. Get to know you, on your own, and keep building that mindset. Mokee is right- You do have us, and you'll be pleasantly about how rich an experience something like this can turn out to be - hurtful start and all.

Also- here's a favorite video of mine on the beauty of being alone vs lonely.

:)

Share this comment


Link to comment

What a freeing experience. I am so glad you are able to realize the beauty of it all. It is hard to let go of relationships at times for whatever reason are not meant for us. Although, difficult at the time when you look back you will realize it made you stronger and better. Something is always waiting on the otherside of it.

Share this comment


Link to comment

Good for You. You are NOT alone. I am not alone. We are family - VST family and we do (I found out the first day I joined) care about each other. That's a great feeling. So to paraphase what you said....

LET GO & LET GOD. He's got this, get out of his way. Lord it took me too many times of standing in front of him to realize I should move to side. ;)

Share this comment


Link to comment

Amen!! You're doing the right thing. Going into this journey you will really need to be free from any distractions, especially ones that might have been seen as co-dependent. Obesity and over eating is an addiction, and until we all realize this for ourselves we will always fall back into bad habits. You're already starting out on the right foot.

You're going to do wonders with your Sleeve! :)

Share this comment


Link to comment

Oh, hun. All I can say is that we are right there with you. I'm a true believer that if it's meant to be, it will be. I'm a little farther on the spectrum and have had friends point out the obvious- I dated and had relationships with emotional vampires, guys who took advantage of my insecruities with weight and didn't treat me right because of it... I held on to hope that if only I did this better or that better it would work out, because I just didn't want to feel alone. I'm only a few weeks post op, but I can already tell a huge behavior change in myself. I haven't dated in months, and I don't plan too until I"m a at least 50 lbs lighter, to give myself the time and peace to put it all back together, mentally, physically, and emotionally. I have made promises to myself to demand better, and if I don't find the right guy- it's going to be okay. I can wait. I'm no longer clingy or focused or trying to force things. By making my health and weight my number one priority my attitude on so many things has changed- and I too feel peace. You clearly have a kind heart and good soul, and you will find Mr. Right- just wait, it will come... god bless.

Share this comment


Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×