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Passing Time

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Well - this is my first posting and first blog so here goes!


I feel lately I have had a lot of firsts....first major surgery, first time putting myself first, first time owning my health, etc


I have to say that it definitely is hard to choose yourself first. Anyone with children, a spouse, family, etc knows what I mean. You feel as if you are cheating them out of being there. It has taken me many years to come to understand that what I thought as putting them first was actually an excuse for me to continue to be unhealthy. How was I putting them first if I wasn't taking the best care of myself? This is a VERY hard lesson to learn. As I look around at my family members and family history of chronic weight related issues I put my foot down. There was a voice deep down saying "me, me...did you forget that I am here?" This time I chose to listen.


I have not always been overweight...alright "morbidly obese". This is something that has been rolling along pretty much for the past 15 years. You know the story....get married (get comfortable), have children (more comfortable with a few pounds) and before you know it you are a shell of the person you once were. Years go by and you lose a little and gain more and back and forth. Many of us have the same story. My weight loss surgery journey originally began two and a half years ago, Dec 2009 with a seminar for the lap band. I went and listened and then said I will give it another try of doing it myself and bailed on following through. Two years later I found myself at the seminar again with a firm grip on my nerves and actually listened with more conviction about choosing me first.


After going through the 3 months of NUT, psych appointment, surgeon visits and pre-op testing...I took a leap of faith with myself and God :) .

I had clear liquids 24 hrs before surgery and was officially sleeved on 7/17 at 10am.


I am currently 10 days post-op and completely intrenched in the full liquid diet. What can you say about liquids? Not a whole lot :D . Anyway, I am just passing time until Tues when I get to start the greatly anticipated puree stage. Never thought I would be so excited about eating food the consistency of baby food. But here I am and readily counting the hours.


This past 2 weeks has given me time to do a lot of thinking!! Sometimes I wonder if the liquid stage is just as much for learning to listen to your body and conquering some of your food obsession as it is about letting your body heal.


I have found that everyday that voice is getting a little stronger and I can't wait to begin to have NSVs and see the weight come off. I will take each day of passing time to consider the gift I have been given of my life, living longer, spending more time with family and friends. I am 38 years old and have a lifetime ahead of me and plan to make it the best I can!! :rolleyes:

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Hey buddy, great first blog!

Our surgeries being only a day apart--- I also am looking forward to becoming a baby--- this infant stuff...pfffft.. dying for a mushed egg!

You're doing awesome and I'm looking forward to seeing all your progress.

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I concur, great first blog. Well said and I totally relate.....in most ways, we all do. My surgery is 8.23.12. I look forward to this journey and I encourage you to write, write, and write. Time for change. Love it.....write more.

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Having time off for two weeks really does give time to think =) It is very insightful about the giving yourself a chance to learn and conquer food addition, I definitely agree that intended or not, that is a great thing for us sleevers to be forced to take a break from the options of food choices. I'm excited for you and it sounds like you're doing awesome =D I hope that things continue to go as well, keep us updated!

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"Me, first" is different than 'selfish.' Congratulations on deciding to take care of yourself, and in following through. It isn't easy to change.

I struggled for a long time with a sense of failure that I couldn't "do this on my own." Eventually, having worked with eating disordered patients, I realized that I'd have to develop an anorexic thought pattern to actually lose the weight I gained after MS. No, thanks. I want healthy thinking... not to exchange one problem for another.

So I did the sleeve, and now I'm working on remembering that it is not selfishness to put my needs first when it comes to health. I've changed my schedule at work, I'm doing some different things at home, and I'm maintaining an attitude of thankfulness that losing the weight has been mostly a 'painless' thing, in that I'm not constantly thinking, "I can't have that," or "I can't eat that" and feeling deprived and frustrated. In fact, it's the other way. I look at the food I'm supposed to eat for the day and think, "How will I ever finish this?!" :P

Good for you. This is me *clapping & cheering* from the Front-Row-Fans section.


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