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Guilt-Free Midnight Snacks

Midnight Snacks   Are you a night owl who sometimes gets the midnight munchies? It's okay to add a late-night snack to your meal plan, particularly during Phase 1 of the program when you're still getting your hunger and cravings under control. Frequent snacking can help stabilize your blood sugar and insulin levels, according to Dr. Arthur Agatston, leading preventive cardiologist and author of The South Beach Diet Supercharged. Here are some tasty late-night snack ideas, suitable for all Phases:   Celery sticks with hummus or natural, no-sugar-added peanut butter
I still have trouble accepting that it's okay to have peanut butter. (grin) Still, making these and having them handy with the raw veggies in a serving-size ziploc baggie means I grab what's most convenient (the baggie). Raw veggies
Lean deli meat roll-ups
Yummy and again, easily rolled up and available. Part-skim mozzarella cheese stick
These are great! Least likely to leave something visible in your teeth, so perfect for the on-the-go Nuts such as almonds, peanuts, or pistachios, but stick to one serving — about 15 almonds, 20 peanuts, or 30 pistachios — since too many nuts can impede weight loss
For me, this is one of those "betcha can't eat just one!" foods. A handful of nuts of any kind just doesn't satisfy me, but don't let my love of nuts influence you. Again, those snack-sized baggies come in very handy for portion control. Fat-free or 1 percent cottage cheese with salsa or chopped cucumber
I've not tried salsa or chopped cucumber in my cottage cheese. I grew up thinking of cottage cheese as a sweet, so I dip out a serving (about 1 cup) and add Splenda and flavored extracts to taste. Dry-roasted or boiled edamame (green soybeans)
Edamame is a recent addition to my snack repetoire, and I love them! They're as addicting as popcorn. However, let me add here that I'm a lucky bandster who can --in small quantities-- injest popcorn with no harm done. I enjoy spicing up my popcorn with cheese, ranch dressing powder, or creole seasonings. Popcorn and the more expensive edamame are the basis of my "no-guilt thinking snack" when I'm writing during the day. Fat-free or 1 percent milk
Let me add in here that, IMHO, sometimes a snack attack is not hunger but thirst. I use the same technique I did to quit smoking to get away from unhealthy snacks. Always acknowledge the craving's existence, but wait thirty minutes and drink something instead. Sometimes a glass of milk or an icy Crystal Light will do the job. Plain nonfat or low-fat yogurt
The worst and biggest craving in our house is for ice cream. My DH could eat the high fat, high calorie stuff and still look like a stick. So, for me plain yogurt and the aforementioned cottage cheese are diet salvations. By using the myriad of flavored extracts available online, such as Watkins Products, I can have everything from chocolate to pina colada (pineapple, coconut, and rum extracts, combined) without breaking my diet. Remember, nuts are allowed! A strawberry on top makes it festive. Who says you can't play with your food?     Lena Austin http://www.LenaAustin.com http://depravedduchess.blogspot.com  
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Alice in One-der-land, Episode One

Once there was a woman named Alice who fell down a spiraling hole of guilt and shame while following an elusive White Rabbit of Beauty. She discovered a magical place called One-der-land, though at first it seemed a place of madness and horror. I'll occasionally recount (not in chronological order because this is a place of madness, after all, at least to Alice) some of her adventures.     Alice landed at the bottom of the Shame Spiral in tears, her body shattered by so many years of abuse, both from within Alice herself and from others, who felt she didn't deserve anything. She wondered if she'd ever be able to get up, but she managed to heave herself erect and walk, still hoping for another glimpse of the beautiful White Rabbit. Alice had to rest often, and had trouble breathing, but the path seemed familiar somehow, as if she'd traveled upon it or at least seen it many times. Her feet swelled, her knees hurt, and upon occasion she considered just lying down at the side of the path and becoming another one of the many grave markers just visible through the thorny bushes. Still, something inside her refused to allow her to give up. She had to keep fighting.     Finally, an angel in a white coat smiled at her. "You've been approved. Step forward. Your new journey can begin. At the end of your time here, you will see the White Rabbit if you are patient and work hard."     In a clearing sat a man wearing another white coat, but this man was unlike any other she'd ever seen. In his own charming way, he was handsome, and his eyes were kind. He invited her to sit and rest at his table, where a fascinating array of things were laid out. Some were gruesome body parts in frames or on pedestals. Some were the familiar diet protein shakes she'd starved herself with many times. Other things were not easy to describe and made no sense.     Her handsome new friend tried desperately to make himself understood. Alice leaned forward, for he seemed so earnestly trying to explain something important, but though he spoke English soon his words were gibberish, and Alice knew in her heart it was her fault she couldn't understand him anymore.     What she had understood was that he would help her, if she would obey the rules of One-der-land. He'd given her a few, and told her she must discover the rest for herself. All would be revealed to her slowly, allowing her to adjust to this new and frightening world. Then the man vanished, and Alice was left alone wondering what to do next.     A cheerful fairy peeked in. Her bright eyes and sleek figure made Alice very envious, but she was so sweet and charming, Alice couldn't stay angry with her for long. The fairy danced up to Alice. "Hi! My name is Locarb! I just know we're going to be friends!"     Now Alice was very suspicious. She'd heard of Locarb fairies, and they could be very vicious, even expensive, to keep as friends. Alice narrowed her eyes. "Are you going to make me buy ridiculously expensive things I don't know how to use, limit me, and put me in a very narrow box?"     Locarb's laugh was the tinkle of bells! "No, no! That's what happens when YOU limit ME!" The fairy reached into her basket and pulled out a white mound of something creamy, covered in a brightly colored sauce, served in a small bowl. "Here, I'll prove myself. This treat is for you. This magical treat will keep you from being naughty and disobeying the Lord and Master, whom you just met. You may only have this once a day, so choose wisely when you have it."     Alice looked longingly at the white creamy stuff, served so very prettily. It looked like the evil poisons that had made her addicted and ill. Her body craved those poisons like an alcoholic craved liquor, and so she feared them all. She sniffed it cautiously. "I smell raspberries...and cream."     Locarb nodded, her cute blonde curls bobbing. "Yes. I assure you, you can have this. I'll allow you to have this early today, just to show my good intentions."     Her fingers shook, but Alice licked her lips and took a tiny taste. Raspberry and something like cheesecake exploded on her tongue and slid down her throat like ambrosia from the gods. Alice's eyes filled with tears. She put the spoon back in the bowl and pushed it all aside. She sobbed. "I can't have things like this! They're poisoning me. Please, take it away before I gulp it all down! I'm already sick from things like this. It's too delicious and wonderful for evil creatures like me."     The fairy picked up the spoon and put it back in Alice's hand. "Yes, you can have it. Trust me. It's expensive in calories, but there are only 8 carbs in this treat, and it will keep you from wanting the poisons you have been eating. Now, enjoy your treat. I will help you, if you let me."     "Okay, but it's your fault if I get fatter." Alice sniffled, and ate all the contents of the bowl slowly, savoring every drop. When she went too fast, the fairy tugged at her hand until she slowed down. Finally, the bowl was empty. Alice waited for the horrible sugar rush that temporarily gave her energy, then sent her crashing to the earth with less than she'd had before. The rush never came. In fact, she felt...good. "Oh my! What was that?"     Locarb leaned close. "The legend of no desserts in One-der-land is false, and always has been. However, like all treasures, it must be sought and enjoyed wisely. This is your first weapon in the war against the addiction that has poisoned you all your life." She pressed a small piece of paper in Alice's hand. "Use it wisely and well, or it will do you no good!"     Locarb's Creamy Treat 2 servings 400 calories/ 8 carbs     1 block of cream cheese 2 T. Splenda 2 T. milk, cream, or half-n-half 2 T. any sugar-free syrup such as Torani or daVinci (see links) per serving     Open the cream cheese package and drop the cream cheese into the bowl of your food processor. Add the Splenda and cream. Whirl, using a spatula at least once to get the creamy mix off the sides of the bowl if necessary, until the substance is light and fluffy. Place in a small sherbet bowl. Pour sugar-free syrup over each serving, as desired. Eat slowly.     Copyright: Lena Austin 2010 Do not distribute without direct written permission from the author.     ::NOTE-- the opinions and ideas expressed in this blog are my own, and opinions are like anuses. We all have them and they all stink. Except mine, which smells like roses.
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Pre-Op Visit with Doc Tomorrow

Wow, I guess I've been working pretty hard. I've not been here for a whole month?   My appointment is tomorrow to see the doc. I could say something snarky, like "I wonder what he looks like." It wouldn't be true. I met him once a few months ago for about fifteen minutes. Maybe he'll get off the cell phone and actually talk to me this time.   If not, I really don't care. I have a few questions and suggestions based on what the anesthesiology department of the hospital recommended. For instance, because I'm a "hard stick" (read that as nearly impossible to start an IV by most supposedly normal hospital employees, and definitely impossible by the lab rats) they recommend I get a PIC line. Hey, anything to avoid breaking the current record of 21 sticks to get an IV started.   I have them all written down in my ring binder, ready for tomorrow. I just want to scream, "Get it over with, willya? This diet of 30g of carbs and only 1400 calories max is trying my patience and my marriage." Besides, trying to do this liver reduction diet during the holidays would try the willpower of saints, and honey, a saint I ain't.   Lena
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Homemade Mayonnaise

Ever looked on the side of your mayonnaise jar and wondered why there needs to be preservatives and ingredients you can't pronounce? I did. So, I wondered what would happen if I started making my own. Then I discovered the joys of using my own flavored oils, vinegars, and spices to create special mayonnaise just for certain recipes. One of my greatest triumphs was when I made basil mayonnaise for sandwiches. Yum! Try it!  
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Liquids/Mushies Recipe-- Corner-Filling Consomme

I recommend you use a v-slicer or mandoline to get the onions as thin as you need. My little $10 v-slicer gets a lot of use!     2 T. butter 4 oz sliced mushrooms 1 small onion, sliced paper-thin 1 qt. beef broth 2 T. dry sherry (use a sherry you'd be willing to drink, not cooking sherry.) 1/4 t. pepper   Melt the butter in a skillet, and saute the mushrooms and onions in the butter until they're limp. Add the beef broth, sherry, and pepper. Let it simmer for 5 minutes, just to blend the flavors, then serve immediately.   There will be six servings in this recipe, with 5 g of carbs and 8 g of protein. No calorie count is given.
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Recipe-- Peanut Soup

Peanut Soup If you miss split pea or bean soup, try this. 3 T. butter 2-3 ribs celery, finely chopped 1 med onion, finely chopped 2 quarts chicken broth ½ tsp salt 1-1/4 cups smooth peanut butter 2 cups heavy cream Optional garnish for non-bandsters: chopped salted peanuts Melt the butter in a skillet, and sauté the celery and onion in the butter. Add the broth, salt, and peanut butter, and stir. Cover and simmer on the lowest temperature for at least one hour, stirring now and then.
Note: If your slow cooker will hold this quantity of ingredients, it’s idea for cooking this soup. Stir in the cream and simmer for another 15 minutes. Makes 5 servings. Garnish the bowls of the non-bandsters with the chopped peanuts.
Carb count will depend on the brand of peanut butter you use. There are low-sugar smooth ones that significantly reduce the carb count while keeping a significant protein count.
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Low Carb Recipes on Food.com

I signed up for the beta test, and I'm pleased so far. Yes, they need to work out some bugs, but it's not bad.   Here's what I got in my email:   Welcome to Food.com! Click this link to log in and get started: http://www.food.com. What exactly is Food.com? It's a handy little application that lets you search through recipes indexed from the best recipe sources on the web, and allows you to store the ones you like - all in one place.   What is the Beta about? This is a REAL Beta, which means you have access to Food.com while we are still actively debugging and developing the application. You can learn more about the features and fun stuff on Food.com in our FAQs. There is a link to the FAQs in the left hand side of the footer of the site. And if you find things that don't feel fully baked, let us know! Use the feedback links in the nav bar and the footer on the site, or simply email us at feedback@food.com..   We're thrilled to have you help us cook up something fantastic. Sincerely, The Food.com team
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Basic Bavarian Variations

As promised, here are some of the variations. There are more! Wait until you see the delicious mushies I found! I'm so excited! Even though I'm on solids, I remember how difficult it got eating only mushies and "clear liquids." These help!  
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Recipe (Mushie)-- Tuscany Bean Soup

Tuscany Bean Soup This delicious soup is thin, and therefore very good to start with when you're first allowed mushies. I could not find any canned beans labeled "cannellini" so I substituted great northern beans. I also use the minced garlic you buy in jars. It’s so much easier than trying to mince itty-bitty cloves. There’s also a reason they recommend low sodium chicken broth. You’ll want to salt this to your taste, not the manufacturer’s. Ingredients: 1 T. olive oil (EVOO not needed) ½ c. chopped onion 2 cloves garlic, minced 4-5 cups low sodium chicken broth 1 (16 oz) can cannellini beans, drained and rinsed 1 sprig fresh rosemary or ¼ tsp dried is fine. Salt and pepper to taste ½ tsp dried basil, or ½ cup torn fresh basil leaves if you have them ½ cup grated low fat Cheddar cheese Heat the oil in a medium to large saucepan over medium heat. Add the onion and stir about 5-10 minutes until golden. Add the garlic and stir for just a minute more. Your nose will tell you it’s fragrant and ready. Add 4 cups of the chicken broth, the beans, and the rosemary. Bring to a boil, then reduce the heat and simmer for 15 minutes. Keep the extra broth handy just in case the soup thickens a bit more than you like. Season the soup with the salt, pepper, and basil. Taste it to ensure you like the seasonings as often as you need. Serve topped with 1/8 cup of cheese for each of the four servings. For those past the mushie stage, I do suggest a bowl of spinach salad to round off the dish. For non-bandster family members, you can add whole grain rolls and butter. This is an altered version of a recipe I got from www.SavingDinner.com . I highly recommend joining this organized and efficient way of meal planning, since they have several meal plans including kosher, gluten free, heart healthy, low carb (including Weight Watcher points), etc. Every week’s meal plan even comes with a grocery list. Nutrition: 202 calories; 5g fat, 19g protein, 20g carbs, 5g fiber, 3 mg cholesterol, 991mg sodium. Points: 4.
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Mushies- Chocolaty Velvet Ice Cream (Fattening)

Okay, here's the more fattening version. However, it doesn't require an ice cream machine, and it can be made using sugar free and fat free ingredients to reduce the carb impact. I found sugar freee chocolate chips at my grocery store, so I may make my own chocolate sauce using Splenda. We'll see how it goes. BTW, I'm allergic to nuts, so I'd appreciate someone telling me how the nuts taste in this one.   The original recipe has 382 calories and 32 carbs. I'll bet we can reduce it with a bit of effort.  
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New Traditions

This morning I found myself pondering yesterday's diet sabotage attempt. A dear friend of the family brought over a gift of coffee and homemade cookies, totally spacing that I'm having weight loss surgery and am on a very restricted diet. Bless her, she meant well. As soon as she left, I handed the cookies to my husband and brother with orders to gorge themselves and then hide the rest. Since the bag is no longer in evidence to tempt me, I'll assume they followed instructions.   Today I'm re-thinking the holiday traditions of hostess gifts and holiday traditions. Why can't I give candles, coffee, and useful things instead of contributing to the obesity of my friends and family with carbs? What I bring to share in a celebration doesn't have to be a consumable, carb-laden food item. Why not give something that sticks around to remind the recipient of our wonderful times together?   For instance, a friend of mine loves and admires the permanent gift tags I made with polymer clay and cookie cutters. She wants a set for her family so badly, she's practically salivating. They take maybe an hour to make, tops. Why can't I make her a set? I sew little gifts like wallets, purses, and teddy bears all the time. Why can't I make some to keep around for quick little hostess gifts?   Even when I do feel obligated to bring a food item, I'm sure I can be more creative than mere cookies. Hmm. How about an apothecary jar filled with decaf instant tea flavored with Crystal Light?   Today, I'm hitting my hobby corner. I'm going to make a few hostess gifts in advance, because it's time for new traditions. Next year, I will serve low-carb healthy feasts and give better gifts.   Lena:thumbup:
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Small Rewards

Wow, I'm so proud of myself. I ate less than my self-imposed calorie count, and definitely stayed below doc's ordered 30g of carbs per day. The Atkins shakes are pretty darn good. I may keep having them for breakfast even after I'm allowed solids.   Today was one of the small rewards that keep me going. Last spring I had to add gussets in several pairs of my pants so I could continue wearing them. Then I grew too fat to wear them anyway. (sigh) I reluctantly stowed them on the shelf in my closet.   Out of curiosity and heartily tired of the same old two pairs of jeans, I pulled those gusseted pants out of the closet and slid them on. All the way on. Then zipped them. They were loose! So loose, I interrupted my shopping trip to yank them back off my hips, much to the amusement of my roomie.   That small victory gave me some much needed confidence and encouragement. I even feel like writing again, and I've been too blocked to write since mid-fall. Suddenly, the characters are "talking" to me again!   Happy Dancing! Lena
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New Motivational Force-- One Daughter

My daughter (DD3) has moved in with us. She's 24, and hadn't been able to find work in her field in Denver. Hence a desperation flight to us filled with hope. Since she works in the same fields as my DH, we have hope they'll motivate each other.   DD3 has another motivational point in her favor. Like me, she tends to be overweight. She's 5'10" and weighed a couple of pounds more than I did when she arrived.   Immediately, she saw the benefits of dieting with me on the buddy system. We've each lost four pounds! Woohoo! This is going to work!
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Recipe-- Lemon and Herb Rubbed Pork Chops

Lemon and Herb Rubbed Pork Chops   Ingredients   1-1/2 teaspoons finely shredded lemon peel - 1 teaspoon dried rosemary, crushed 1/2 teaspoon salt1/2 teaspoon dried sage, crushed 1/2 teaspoon black pepper 8 cloves garlic, minced 4 pork loin chops, cut 1-1/4 inches thick   Directions   For rub, in a small bowl combine lemon peel, rosemary, salt, sage, pepper, and garlic. Trim fat from chops. Sprinkle rub evenly over both sides of chops; rub in with your fingers.   For a charcoal grill, arrange medium-hot coals around a drip pan. Test for medium heat above pan. Place chops on grill rack over pan. Cover; grill for 35 to 40 minutes or until chops are slightly pink in centerand juices run clear (160F), turning once halfway through grilling.   (For a gas grill, preheat grill. Reduce heat to medium. Adjust for indirect cooking. Grill as above.)   Lena's notes: Makes only 4 chops. They may be dry if you cook them too long, making them difficult to get past the stoma. Undercook them slightly and allow them to rest for 5-15 minutes, covered with a sheet of foil. They'll finish cooking while resting. This will allow time for the juices to redistribute into the meat, giving you a moister bite you can get past the stoma.   AFTER THEY"VE RESTED, cut them up into tiny pieces before you sit down, and you'll be less tempted to gobble.   Nutrition Facts Calories 292,Total Fat (g) 10,Saturated Fat (g) 4,Monounsaturated Fat (g) 5,Polyunsaturated Fat (g) 1,Cholesterol (mg) 105,Sodium (mg) 371,Carbohydrate (g) 3,Total Sugar (g) 0,Fiber (g) 1.   Karen Marshall North Attleboro, MA508-463-7142 Wildtree Herbs Independent Representative_www.wildtree. com_ (http://www.wildtree .com/)
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Recipe: A very different Burger

Lots of carbs in this one, but when you're desperate for a new taste...     The link for the yummy Turkey-Cranberry Burgers is http://my.hearthealthyonline.com/hho/recipe/recipedetail.jsp?recipeId=R111043   Makes: 4 servings Prep: 20 minutes Grill: 12 minutes   Ingredients 1/2 cup finely shredded carrot 1/4 cup thinly sliced green onions 2 tablespoons fine dry bread crumbs 2 tablespoons fat-free milk 1/4 teaspoon dried Italian seasoning, crushed 1/8 teaspoon salt 1/8 teaspoon ground black pepper 12 ounces uncooked ground turkey breast or chicken breast 1 cup mixed baby greens 4 whole wheat hamburger buns, split and toasted 1/2 cup whole cranberry sauce   Directions In a medium bowl, stir together carrot, green onions, bread crumbs, milk, Italian seasoning, salt, and pepper. Add ground turkey; mix well. Shape the turkey mixture into four 1/2-inch-thick patties.   Place patties on a greased grill rack directly over medium coals. Grill, uncovered, for 12 to 15 minutes or until patties are done (165°F),* turning once halfway through grilling.   Arrange mixed greens on bottoms of buns. Top with grilled patties and cranberry sauce; replace top halves of buns.   Nutrition Facts   Nutrition facts per serving: Servings Per Recipe 4 servings Calories 283 Total Fat (g) 2 Saturated Fat (g) 0 Monounsaturated Fat (g) 0 Polyunsaturated Fat (g) 0 Cholesterol (mg) 53 Sodium (mg) 377 Carbohydrate (g) 40 Total Sugar (g) 19 Fiber (g) 3 Protein (g) 26 *Percent Daily Values are base on a 2,000 calorie diet
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An Old Dog Learns New Tricks

Today is a milestone day on my little lap band journey. I'm now allowed regular liquids including meal replacement shakes instead of only clear liquids like broths. That's a biggie for me. I made the mistake of gulping a slug of my hot tea on Saturday evening, and paid in discomfort for a half hour thereafter, so I'm starting slowly with a cup of coffee in a Sippy cup.   Yes, I typed "a Sippy cup." You see, learning to eat in very tiny amounts requires some re-education. Besides learning not to take big mouthfuls of hot tea (or coffee, for that matter), I have to learn to sip delicately like a lady. Go ahead and laugh. I did. Me? Okay, so pain can teach an old dog new tricks.   However the Sippy cup resembles a sparkly purple travel coffee mug, I know what it is. My adult dignity is slightly offended by this ten-ounce cure to greedy gulping. I took out the plastic insert, but it still gives me some much-needed control over what flows into my mouth. I need it, but I want something that doesn't offend my dignity quite so much.   So, I rummaged in my china hutches until I found my great-grandmother's tiny delicate bowls and plates. Just using these bone china items gives me the willies and inspires caution. You definitely don't gouge out a scoop of even Jell-o from that fragile bowl.   Since my new stomach pouch will hold less than three ounces, I'm definitely going to learn portion control in a hurry. I don't want to waste food, but I think 1/2 cup of oatmeal will fill that teeny bowl to the brim and be much more than I can eat at a sitting. Amazing.   I'm now looking at food completely differently now. It's more "You want me to eat THAT MUCH? Uh, no!" than "Yuk! That looks disgusting." Pizza, burgers, and sweets still look and smell appetizing. I just know better than to think about having more than a taste. That's it. Less than a mouthful, thanks, or I'll be in agony later when that bread, rice, or potato plugs up my stomach like a cork in a bottle and sends me to the ER. How about I settle for a slice of pepperoni to nibble on, thanks. You have the rest with my blessing. Please feel free.   I certainly feel free. I'm not limited except by good sense and my own free will. I chose this path. I like the way I will live for the rest of my life. I don't need breads, cakes, pastas, nuts, and rice to be happy. I'll roll up my ham slice in a piece of romaine lettuce and have an excellent "sandwich" on a picnic this summer. Next year at Thanksgiving, I'll enjoy a bit of turkey, veggies, and maybe a spoonful of the pumpkin pie filling. (I'll give my crust to my grateful dog, who is joyously happy to clean my plate of scraps.) I'll smile in triumph while DH and Dante make pigs of themselves on the stuffing, gravy, and dinner rolls because I made those things for them to enjoy. I get more satisfaction out of watching them enjoy than I do being fat.
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Pinwheel Appetizers

I've skipped the wild rice and substituted Cauli-rice with no loss in flavor, or done without it entirely. I've also changed out the corned beef for other sliced deli meats to create different flavors. With these little guys in the fridge, safely stowed in a storage container, I have no fear of the mid-afternoon or late night snack attack.
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California Vegetable Cheese Bake

California Vegetable Cheese Bake (3 Points)   4 cups frozen carrot, broccoli & cauliflower blend, thawed 1/2 cup finely chopped onion (can use frozen chopped onion) 1 (10-3/4 oz) can Healthy Request Cream of Mushroom Soup 1/4 cup (one 2-ounce jar) chopped pimiento, drained 1-1/2 cups cubed Velveeta Light processed cheese   Spray slow cooker container with butter-flavored cooking spray. In prepared container, combine thawed vegetables & onion. Add mushroom soup, pimiento & cheese. Mix well to combine. Cover & cook on LOW for 4 to 6 hours. Mix well before serving.   140 calories, 3 gm fiber, 4 gm fat 13 gm protein, 13 gm carbohydrate, 236 mg sodium, 373 mg calcium (3 points per 2/3 cup serving)
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The Economy Hits Home--An Update

Well, DH made it home, but not without problems. Within 24 hours of his return, he was burning up with a fever. Today is the first day he awakened and said he felt better. (Relieved sigh)   Now maybe he can look for a new job. I love him very, very much. Seeing him walk through that bus terminal door made my heart burst right out of my chest, plop to the floor and roll to his feet. Scruffy, sleep-deprived, and stinking from riding a bus for 2.5 days, he was still my gorgeous darling. Yeah, I'm seriously besotted with my grumpy old man.   However, our savings had already been severely depleted by our purchase last year of this lovely house we live in. I'd not been able to replenish most of the money, though I managed about a month's worth of stockpile before the budget goes belly up.   One month to find a job before disaster. I'm looking at the month of April with desperation. I'm lighting candles and praying to that he'll find work quickly. We don't need much. A mere $1200 a month net is all we need to make ends meet.   This is also a disaster for my weight loss. My DH is a carb hound who can afford to eat rice, potatoes, bread, cakes, sweets, and starchy vegetables. The man is so thin, it's scary. My new low-carb life is impossible for him to maintain. He's positive he'll starve. (grin) So, I'm baking and cooking just like I used to before my band, and there's fudge in the fridge, chili in the crock pot, and the remains of Monkey Bread on the counter.   I can resist anything but temptation, and having the Monkey Bread on the counter was too much for me yesterday. I sliced off some and hunkered down like a child stealing cookies. Less than five minutes into it, my band made me pay dearly for my naughtiness. Umm...I never want to look at Monkey Bread again. Blech! That HURT. A lot.   I'm a stress eater, and right now I'm very, very grateful for my band. I can only do so much damage before my band reminds me forcefully that I'm not allowed that much self-indulgence.   Today, instead of eating and worrying, I think I'll update my own resume. I may be a disabled old woman, but maybe I can sweep floors or something.
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