Bandista

Have fun, Jean, and know you are worth it all....I love reading your pieces. Choose yourself first and enjoy filling up that closet and feeling good about yourself. You deserve it!

When I elected to have weight loss surgery I knew it was a big deal for me but I had no idea how it would impact my life as a whole. Choosing myself first and my healthy future has given me so much self-esteem. I'm thrilled with the weight loss but this unexpected aspect of empowerment is truly amazing. Thanks for addressing this so eloquently!

#1 Tip-Off for me is when my mother is promoting something -- she is a canary in a coalmine in that regard. Get-Rich-Quick meets Fountain-of-Youth is too much for some people to resist.......

I'm a good cook and enjoy eating out at restaurants. My main issue is that I have kept my WLS private and it is sometimes hard to conceal how little I'm eating. I usually split an entree with my husband if he's along -- like a tenderloin or something I'm not inclined to make at home. He also gets an appetizer or two to make sure he's not going to starve, lol. If it's a business lunch, etc., and I'm wound up or tense I often can't eat much at all. Sometimes I will say something like, "I had a protein shake before I came and it really filled me up." Another tactic is I will just order an appetizer and say I'm saving room for dessert. When it comes time for dessert I will forgo that or offer to split something, in which case I just have a couple of bites and am completely satisfied (miracle). And I don't ever go to chain places, etc. -- I want to have really good fresh food prepared well otherwise it's not worth it to me.

Boy am I glad I work from home and only have to dress up once in a while. Eeek! But as for clothes, I do think the jeans sizes going down are the key to happiness and momentum (rather than that damn scale).

So happy for you to have found your worthiness and sense of self -- what a great story of breaking out of a mold you did not fit into. Your self-honesty and strength are very inspiring. Thanks for sharing!

I'm sorry but there is a lot of new data coming out on the subject of whether breakfast is necessary. We are not all the same. I never eat breakfast anymore because I'm not hungry until a little later in the day. For many people, breakfast triggers more eating and thus a higher calorie count for the day.

Thanks for this. When our child was growing up we were very careful about sugar. I was always amazed at how people would try to give him just one cookie, etc., as though we were depriving him. Today he is an adult with a good sense of his own nutritional needs. He loves protein and is not addicted to caffeine, etc. Our treat beverage was seltzer water. People give kids sugar to try to make them like them. What children want is a little bit of time and attention, to know that some one is listening. Here's to healthy kids who know how to read labels so they understand how to make good choices -- if you can't pronounce it, don't eat it! Thanks for a great piece.

Great piece -- thanks so much and congratulations on turning your life around. I'm looking forward to making my list for 2015. Prior to surgery I wrote myself a letter to be opened at goal. I look forward to reading that.

It's a party every day in our society so the holiday time is really no different. I am not on a diet now so there's no going off whatever diet and overdoing because I know I'll have to go back into a super restrictive mode -- that mentality did not serve me well.

I think it's all about the chewing and swallowing -- that connection between the esophagus and brain, which then provides a signal for satiety. I did not have that before my band. For me it has nothing to do with eating to some kind of capacity. The band won't let me overdo it but that isn't the point -- I don't get to that place as I don't want it. I feel hunger and welcome it now, but when I've had enough I've had enough. Like others, I find I get bored with the food, playing with it or just not interested anymore. That tells me that I'm done. If I'm still hungry, however, I don't deprive myself. To me this is key -- not to be too restrictive with myself so that I have a bounce-back to that all or nothing kind of thinking, or good/bad. I do still love food -- I enjoy choosing it, preparing it, serving it and, mostly, eating it. But I'm much less interested in the latter than I am in the whole experience of dining. I like the bites of yummy food but it's such a pleasure to be available for all the other experiences around me rather than being hyper-focused on what's next, what can I have, is there more, etc.

GREAT piece, Alex, and needed -- so many questions out there about Protein. Personally, my body just tells me. It whispers, "salmon" or I suddenly feel like I've got to have a fried egg. So I listen up and enjoy my protein in food form.

I expect that kind of comment from Rosie O'Donnell but I don't expect to feel berated here for choosing one surgery over another. This is where I come to feel better, usually by trying to make others feel better. If people sound defensive perhaps it's because we keep having to defend a basic medical procedure. I did my research, I chose what was right for ME. Not any one else, just me. Why not support me on my weight loss journey? Are there people who want me to fail because I elected a different avenue? We are on the same path of wellness. Be supportive, PLEASE. It's the Star Belly Sneeches all over again. Now, what I thought I'd be writing before I read all those comments -- great piece, Alex, and thanks for all you do for the WLS community through this site.

I really love cauliflower "smush" -- steam a well-rinsed head and throw in food processor with chicken stock. Add salt and pepper, cumin, coriander, a little chili. Savory pudding, OMG.

I positively agree! Thanks for sharing this excerpt from your book and congratulations on your writing success. "The Support Surgeon" -- love that!