Feeling the guilt

[Horseshowmom 45]

I am just a month post op, and everything is going well, I can’t complain at all. However, everyone in the house is sick, not COVID but some virus, and I’ve been struggling the past few days to get in enough fluids and food just taste bad. I’m only eating a couple
Of bites at each meal. I make my husband and kids a separate meals every day, it’s never an issue, until today. They wanted chicken and noodles and mashed potatoes. I had about half a cup of the mashed potatoes, and it actually tasted so good, but now I do feel genuinely guilty because it definitely doesn’t adhere to Health standards I’ve Stuck to so diligently. Honestly, I’m glad I feel guilty, it helps keep me in line knowing I’d be disappointed in myself for breaking the “rules,” but I gotta tell you, after eating maybe only 200 calories the past two days, it was delicious, lol!

Has anyone else found that guilt, or fear of, is actually such a great asset?

[NovaLuna 709]

My surgeons nutrition guidelines is probably similar to yours where mashed potatoes aren't allowed until you've lost 70% of excess weight (I've lost just slightly over that at 71%). But every surgeons guidelines are different and many allow mashed potatoes in puree stage. Not the greatest choice imo because it's really filling, but doesn't have much nutritional value. But it tastes good, I agree. However, when you do get off track, and it WILL happen, beating yourself up over it isn't the right way to go about things. The more you beat yourself up the more you stress and the more you may fall back into that bad habit and then start the cycle over again. A better tactic to take is just to get back on track because it's highly unlikely that small instance of indulgence is going to have much of an effect on you weight loss. I'm 10 months out so the very few times I DO indulge myself I try to fit those indulgences into my plan via counting carbs, sugar, sodium, and fat (my plan doesn't count calories) so that every now and then I can fit something like a cookie or a CarbSmart Ice Cream bar in as a snack so that I don't indulge in things that are worse for me like chips or cake or a muffin or a donut (none of which I've had since I started dieting 19 months ago).

After surgery I DID notice that I'm even more conscious of my choices as I don't want to be the one that fails this or puts weight back on because I took the surgery route BECAUSE I couldn't do this on my own. I've notices, at least for me, that it's easier to say no. My family eats out a LOT. Like 3-4x a week. They ask me constantly if I want something and 90% of the time I say no. I only say yes if they go to the Mexican restaurant that I like and they get me a mini taco or an enchilada (I eat half) and they only do that once every other week. Though they have gotten a to go order of chicken Marsala a few times (3x) since my surgery from one of my favorite restaurants and it has steamed veggies ala carrots and zucchini and my Mom gave me some of it (there is a lot and I don't eat much so it worked out lol). For me, the way I eat has to be sustainable. This is the way of eating that I plan to stick with so that I don't put that weight back on. So everything I do I do with the mind that this is permanent. I don't miss fast food because it always made me feel slightly nauseous after eating and made me feel bad about myself so that makes it easier for me to say no.

Sticking to the plan isn't always easy. The farther you get out and the closer to your goal weight I think is probably where you will struggle most. For me, Thanksgiving was a day I wanted to indulge and it was only me telling myself 'you came so far and lost so much, don't ruin it' that made me take smaller portions to indulge. I had 1TBS of gravy, 1 TBS of stuffing, 1 TBS of mashed potatoes, and 1/16 of a pumpkin pie (very tiny sliver, but it was delicious). That was my Thanksgiving indulgence and I lost 3 pounds when I weighed myself the following week so not going overboard helped in that I believe. I'm proud of how far I've come and that I'm only 26 pounds from my own personal goal (41 from the doctors goal as they want me to get to 165).

You are doing great with you weight loss and use that guilt you felt and think back on it when you get tempted so it'll make it easier to say no or make you even more conscious of what you put in your mouth, but if again, if you do indulge just get back on track and don't beat yourself up too hard.

[Tracyringo 503]

- I agree with @novaLuna dont beat yourself up. During weight loss phase I didnt track on Thanksgiving and Christmas. I ate what I wanted and yes I felt guilty but honestly those were the only times I ate off plan aside from my nieces wedding that first year and I still hit my goal that first year. Be kind to yourself and good luck on your journey !

Edited December 12, 2020 by Tracyringo

[Tracyringo 503]

Have no idea what happened up there with the download lol. Cant get it off