I'm struggling with the decision to have weight loss surgery. For reference, I'm 38, 5'6", with a BMI of 37.5. I've struggled with my weight for my entire adult life, and after being diagnosed with type 2 diabetes last year, I decided to take steps towards weight loss surgery.

I've been attending pre-surgery appointments for about six months now, and I hope to get a date soon.

Here's the rub. I've lost over 30 pounds in the last 1.5 years. Very slowly, but continuously, and I feel like I'm making changes in my life that could might make this loss more permanent than other diets I've done. I've been at a bit of a stall the last few months, but I keep trying to make positive changes, and I'm not discouraged. I've brought my sugar levels to a point where I'm now considered pre-diabetic (A1C from a 9.6 to 6.1) and I'm still losing weight, but very slowly. I have about 40 pounds to lose before I would (likely) be rid of my diabetes diagnosis.

For those of you who've had surgery, are you truly happy you did it? I'm wondering if I should go as far as I can on my own, even if it takes years, or if surgery is the right tool. My mom is a nurse and tells me a million horror stories, and that is making this decision really hard!

Thank you for any advice!

Hello!

The fact that you're questioning it, maybe you have to reassess the whole situation. Awesome job losing 30 pounds! And you only have 40 to go to make goal? You can postpone the surgery. You can try losing more weight and revisit surgery again, and see if you still feel the need to undergo the knife to lose weight.

I didn't start questioning whether this was for me until after the fact. There were times on my first month, when the pain was intense, or when I would throw up at work I seriously asked myself what did I do. I'll have my 3rd month anniversary in a couple of days. Was it worth it for me? yes. I'm healthier now. I walk 2 miles a day. My blood pressure is under control. It's still a struggle and a huge adjustment. I don't go out partying much anymore lately with my friends because I can't drink alcohol yet and I miss that. I miss my friends. I miss socializing. I still don't eat out with friends coz I still have to concentrate on chewing and not overeating or I'll end up in the bathroom.

Every circumstance is different. Hope I was able to give you another perspective here.

Good Luck and keep us posted. Congratulations again on your weight loss w/out WLS!!

Well we're all a little biased here, most of us would say YES GO FOR IT! Do a lot of research on your own. You need to make this decision for you, you cant rely on us or your mom who I'm sure has your best interest in mind but is likely focusing on nothing but horror stories and ignoring the overwhelming success stories. My advice is to browse forums and support groups like this one and get an idea of peoples' real life struggles. But Look up MEDICAL JOURNALS for information about complication rates. Don't go off what a handful of people's perceptions and opinions are regarding which surgery is right for you.

I'm very happy I had my sleeve done. There are frustrating times, when I'm eating something so yummy I want to pig out and can't! I miss soft buttery bread but know that's not in my best interest to include in my meals. I've developed lactose intolerance and have keep lactaid handy anytime I want yogurt, cheese, or a protein bar. But these nuisances are nothing compared to the hassles being overweight was.

Edited May 16, 20197 yr by KCgirl061

Thank you KCgirl061 and med28thmed!

That's a good suggestion to check out Medical Journals. I know nothing about them, but that is something I had never considered.

I'm taking this decision very seriously because I know it's a lifetime commitment and I love a soft piece of buttered bread (occasionally), I can't imagine not having it! It feels like trying to figure out if you should end a toxic relationship with someone you love. I've read so many forums, and watched SO many YouTube videos. I've spent a fortune of money and time on these damn pre-surgery appointments, so I "feel" locked into the decision, even though I know that's not true. I don't know if I could start over again if my non-surgical journey ends in failure.

Congrats to you both on your decision and your weight loss! And thank you for the suggestions and for sharing your perspective.

It sounds like you're doing well on your own. Good for you! It's a very personal decision based on a lot of factors and I think the responses you're going to get here are going to be biased because most of us us have had WLS. I had the sleeve 5 months ago and I can tell a big difference now with hunger and portion sizes compared to if I hadn't had surgery. The surgery is just a tool, not a solution.

Firstly, congratulations on your 30 lbs lost and the improvement on your A1C! That's great progress and you should be very proud of yourself.

I will say that for myself, I have had long periods where I've lost 30-50 lbs over the course of a year or so, but always hit a point where I regained it. The most recent time, I regained it and also added some extra, and that was the point when I decided for sure that surgery was for me. I couldn't keep repeating that same lose-gain process over and over again. However, everyone is different and it's very possible that you'll be able to keep your weight off and continue to lose on your own. People do it without surgery all the time.

To me it sounds like with your possible scheduling so close, you may just be having last minute jitters. I was excited and happy throughout my whole six-month pre-op process, but then suddenly very nervous in the few days before the surgery and on the day of. However, a week out, I feel amazing and I'm so incredibly happy that I didn't let my nerves talk me out of it after I waited so long to have it done.

As others have said, though, in the end it's really a decision that you have to make for yourself, no matter what input or advice you've gotten from outside influences. I believe you'll make the choice that's best for you regardless!

1 hour ago, gch81kb said:

For those of you who've had surgery, are you truly happy you did it? I'm wondering if I should go as far as I can on my own, even if it takes years, or if surgery is the right tool. My mom is a nurse and tells me a million horror stories, and that is making this decision really hard!

Do what’s best for you.

No regrets that I did this. I am maintaining five years out in the 130s. I needed a long-term solution. I have lost before but have struggled to keep it off. I am a sleeve and I bounced back from surgery quicly with no complications. My weight loss was fast (not the norm)

I'm maintain. I do indulge within reason. If I gain 5 to 10 pounds, I go back to my weight loss mode diet and work it back off.

Here is my dietician’s recipe website for food ideas. (note category tab – click bariatric friendly recipes.)

https://karenmangum.com/category/bariatric-friendly-main-dishes/

https://karenmangum.com/category/bariatric-friendly-desserts/

You like buttered bread, well I did too. Baked a lot of bread myself, was good enough I could easily sold it, had I wanted. Even had branchedto artisan breads for more challenge. Then i had bariatric surgery, lost most of my inate desire for bread and rolls . A while back Tomkitten,my son, asked for Ham Salad on toast, and oh it did look and smell lovely! So yours truly decided to cut one up into teen tiny pieces,i had heard if you toasted it , it would not ball up in your new renovated tummy. Oh Sweetheart, within 15 minutes I was in Misery city
Hurting, puking, crying my eyes out, that was something I will not do Again! And it was no more than 1/8th sandwich. Have not had anything made with wheat flours again, cake, bread, cookies, pie, it just ain't worth the grief your body will put YOU through. Oh things do change a lot!
The good News, after years of trying every diet known to Modern Man and a few I suspect my doctors dreamed up to torture me, I have and still am losing weight. I have lost 150 pounds since my highest weight, oh I WAS a Big Girl, 104 since my surgery nearly 8 1/2 years ago.

I am type 11 diabetic. Since surgery I have lost 53 pounds and am off my whole diabetes medication regimen, except 20 units of lantus at night.

Diabetes is serious and I've had it for 15 years. I have life long complications from it and am excited to be close to being off all medications.

I dont regret this one bit and am excited for my future.

Best of luck!

Edited May 16, 20197 yr by gabybab

I will just bluntly say that I would not have major surgery that reroutes major organs and permanently affects the way you eat if I had "only" 40lbs to lose and was losing on my own. I "only" have 44lbs left to lose and I realize it seems like a lot, but in the grand scheme of things... it isn't... not if you're on a path to losing it already. I would consider this surgery only for individuals who are severely morbidly obese and have not had any success at making permanent lifestyle changes without the drastic kick in the ass that is this procedure. I would sincerely evaluate whether you feel you can make these lifestyle changes without surgery. If you truly feel you can't, then have the surgery.

Edited May 17, 20197 yr by mousecat88

On 5/17/2019 at 4:36 PM, mousecat88 said:

I will just bluntly say that I would not have major surgery that reroutes major organs and permanently affects the way you eat if I had "only" 40lbs to lose and was losing on my own. I "only" have 44lbs left to lose and I realize it seems like a lot, but in the grand scheme of things... it isn't... not if you're on a path to losing it already. I would consider this surgery only for individuals who are severely morbidly obese and have not had any success at making permanent lifestyle changes without the drastic kick in the ass that is this procedure. I would sincerely evaluate whether you feel you can make these lifestyle changes without surgery. If you truly feel you can't, then have the surgery.

I agree. I’d really tighten up my diet and exercise program and try for 6 more months and see if I can lose the weight on my own. I don’t regret surgery for myself but if I had 40 to lose yet or even 60, I wouldn’t have had it.

But everyone’s journey is different.

I am in a similar state in terms of weight loss and current state. I also am just beginning the journey and investigating so this is based on my inexperienced thinking, but for me it’s not about the weight loss, it’s about my health. My type2 is well controlled but I have enough diabetics in my family to know that can turn on a dime. I have sleep apnea, high triglycerides, GERD, stress incontinence and a family history of deaths from cancers. It is the Bariatric surgery impact on the co-morbidities that has drawn me to my investigation. I would talk to your Dr about your concerns. The type2 from Bariatric does not go away merely from the weight loss, there are other contributing factors. Good luck with your decision. Please let us know.

I would absolutely NOT get the surgery again if I had the choice. On the day of my surgery I cried because I was scared of complications. The surgeon assured me that the complication rate was low and I was healthy. Well, guess who had complications? This girl!! It's been the worst 2 months of my life.

It is absolutely your decision and lots of people are happy with it, but I wouldn't reccomend it.

Good luck on your weight loss and decision!!

6 minutes ago, Feeling_Sleevey said:

I would absolutely NOT get the surgery again if I had the choice. On the day of my surgery I cried because I was scared of complications. The surgeon assured me that the complication rate was low and I was healthy. Well, guess who had complications? This girl!! It's been the worst 2 months of my life.

It is absolutely your decision and lots of people are happy with it, but I wouldn't reccomend it.

Good luck on your weight loss and decision!!

Sleevy what is going on? I, too, cried waiting to go into the operating room. It's very scary to make a life changing decision.

I had buyers remorse a few times right after surgery.

I still have some stomach issues, but a jaded a rough go of it the first month.

Best of luck!

Oh and I misspoke about the weight loss timing, it was 8.5 months not years. And I have the Basal Metabolism of a Sick Sea Snail, your get v up and go just went over the years. My body left to it's own devices , and many years I did that, liked Me FAT, saw nothin wrong with me looking like Bip The Michelin Mans Twin Sister. Hey Frustr8, we have been steady friends over 70+ yearrs, these are your Retirement years, retire from living, stay say in that Easy Chair with a Bag of Snack Food. So I had to do an "End-Around" maneuver worthy of the NFL, to get past its defenses. Oh as I tried to lose some pre-surg weight, I opted for cleaner healthier changes but I was throwing down frequent feedings, Body didn't suspect a thing, and I had been seeking a Bariatric Solution for over 3 tears,so Body thought this was a phase I was going through, got quite a shock when I had my RNY last September, got its revenge by structuring my pouch and giving me jejunal ulcers. Well I have been in this fight since last October, it should resolve by late summer, been on anti- nausea meds(Zofran) a strong PPI(Dexilent) and an ulcer-healer (Carafate) along with all my other meds,Magnesium , prenatal vitamin(because it does have iron, folate and all those vitamin goodies)Wellbutrin ( to keep my depression at a mild state) liquid calcium citrate, brand name Wellesse, get it at Wal-Mart, Additional Vitamin D, I live in Ohio and don't often get outside, some meds make me sun- sensitive, and at very best summer I burn, blister and peel, by August or Labor Day I may have a pale tan, best you can hope for a Celtic heritage with Strawberry Blonde hair, okay okay Red-Gold, and I take an additional iron pill called Ferrocite, it's ferrous fumerate, an iron salt even my pouch and intestine can assimilate. But I had to have an Iron INFUSION in March because I was that anemic. But I am hopeful my next labs are better, if not another one in June before my next endoscopy, this EGJ should tell the story, if no better or just the same --surgical intervention is coming , don't know exactly what, but I was told that after my last one in April. My guess is removal of ulcer-ridden section of small intestine, and then re-anastomosis aka rejoining back together healthier tissue. I Am very certain,they won't do anything to Precious Pouch, she looks pretty sweet to the "scopers" thought I was patent, that means open enough that food can pass through and into the s.I., might have been okay that day, but she has tightened up again, still on protein shakes, highly pureed things, she does not like meat, Greek yogurt or cottage cheese, makes for a tedious time, but I still have Soup, broths,no-calorie fluids, And although I am so special I stink, I am. relatively health, clinic says I look good, I still believe I look like roadkill, lovely roadkill, but there I be. Have lost my Hubba-heiny, legs are more shapely, my garbage gut skin is loose and bumpy, I have a scrawny neck like a turtle, the high cheekbones from the Native tribe Daddy's family denies, look in my scrapbooks, every generation it looks stronger, My great-great grandfather was a dead ringer for Iron Eyes Cody the actor, if you were nearly as old as me you would know he was the Indian who stood crying at the polluted things we have done to Mother Earth in the name of progress. Actually asked Aunt Minnie, Daddy's sister, she drew up to her full 5ft4in and announced "We Never Discuss That!" well Yipes can't blame a girl for asking. Do you have Wikipedia on your Smartphone or computer? Go to Peoria Indian tribe or people, the lady pictured there is the spitting image of Aunt Minnie! Yes I look Celtic, fair, taller than even my uncles, but they are dark- haired, mostly straight, few of them now have permanents, medium complections, over heard a discussion of the older generatio one day.
Relative#1 Are you sure she's ours? She sure don't look like us!
Relative#2 Well Cliff says she's his, maybe she favors that mother of hers. Only thing I can figure out.
But Karma is a broad with a warped sense of humor, except for being another color scheme, now that I have lost so much weight I am the spitting image of my Paternal Grandmother, high cheekbones and all. Probably she and my own Mama are both whirling in their graves, luckily 30 miles apart, They did not get along all that well!
So who or what I look like at my goal of 175? That just remains to be seen. Hang around a while if you like, I have someone tell me how paste a picture on here, maybe I will get the courage to try that!

On 5/21/2019 at 1:03 AM, Feeling_Sleevey said:

I would absolutely NOT get the surgery again if I had the choice. On the day of my surgery I cried because I was scared of complications. The surgeon assured me that the complication rate was low and I was healthy. Well, guess who had complications? This girl!! It's been the worst 2 months of my life.

It is absolutely your decision and lots of people are happy with it, but I wouldn't reccomend it.

Good luck on your weight loss and decision!!

I was told the same thing. Developed a marginal ulcer a week out from surgery, then my gallbladder went 4 weeks later and they found a hernia while they were in there. Took 4 months to heal up. But now that it's over with, I am happy. But I was REALLY remorseful in the beginning because I am young and was told everything would go great because I was healthy.

Edited May 22, 20197 yr by mousecat88