Feeling Discouraged...
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I completed all of my initial consultations yesterday (nutrition, RN/program coordinator, and psych eval). I started thinking that the lap-band was 100% for me, the entire program at the hospital where I will have the procedure seems to be pushing for RNY...I have diabetes and I am hearing that there is much better success with the resolution of diabetes after RNY, as compared to the band. I am so confused. I know it is up to me to decide, but it is dreadful. I am also feeling really discouraged because I am 5 foot 4 inches, and the nurse measured me at 5 foot 5! I have never been that tall. And I apparently lost a few lbs on the way to the hospital that morning (friendliest scale I have ever been on...) so my BMI was lower than I thought. It is still 35.7, but I had it in my mind that it was 37+. I am not really sad that my BMI is lower that expected, I am just discouraged because I know I am right on the edge for insurance approval with diabetes. My insurance seems to be really positive regarding the surgery, and I am probably just worried for nothing. It is just hard. I have been going through the motions for a couple of months now, and it is hard to think that all that I have been working for and waiting for will not be. I feel like this is/was my chance to rid myself of this dreaded disease, and finally find the "me" that I know is in this body. I just need some encouragement right now, as I continue to wait to hear what is going to happen next...Thank you all for your support and kind words, I appreciate you all so much!