Hi all- I’m new here. This is my first post. I just came home from my In-take appointment into a bariatric program. I’m full of many different feelings at the moment. The bad- am I making the right decision? Will people think I took the “easy way out”, Can I really beat my food addiction? How floppy will my stretched skin be? Etc Then I’m thinking about the positives- walking around the store without being out of breathe and sweaty, not getting the eye when I take the elevator up a flight of stairs because I get out of breathe and my knees hurt, being able to go and walk around car shows with my fiancé and actually have fun, be able to sit on any chairs again, not having to buy 2 airplane seats, bending over to tie my shoes without problems...

so many thoughts are swirling now. I’m sure I’m not the first person to over think this decision. My insurance is allowing for more of a fast tracked program. I could potentially be having the surgery within a few months instead of 6-8 months. I hope to find support and reassurance here.

Thanks for reading!

spg

You will get the support you need here. All of us here are or have been obese. We all need that support and not be criticized for trying to do what is right for us. Just do what you think is right for you and we will be behind you 100%. I have 1 more month to go and hoping I will be scheduled my the sleeve in December. Good luck on your journey.

5

All of your questions are valid! I would do it all over again if I had to. It's the best decision I've ever made! Congrats on taking the first step and meeting with your new team!

14 minutes ago, Spg said:

Hi all- I’m new here. This is my first post. I just came home from my In-take appointment into a bariatric program. I’m full of many different feelings at the moment. The bad- am I making the right decision? Will people think I took the “easy way out”, Can I really beat my food addiction? How floppy will my stretched skin be? Etc Then I’m thinking about the positives- walking around the store without being out of breathe and sweaty, not getting the eye when I take the elevator up a flight of stairs because I get out of breathe and my knees hurt, being able to go and walk around car shows with my fiancé and actually have fun, be able to sit on any chairs again, not having to buy 2 airplane seats, bending over to tie my shoes without problems...

so many thoughts are swirling now. I’m sure I’m not the first person to over think this decision. My insurance is allowing for more of a fast tracked program. I could potentially be having the surgery within a few months instead of 6-8 months. I hope to find support and reassurance here.

Thanks for reading!

spg

My opinion on the matter, I took control of the narrative, anyone that asks me about my weight loss, I tell them the whole ordeal, this way, no one gets to make stuff up, everyone gets the same information.

Skin issues are going to be very personal. Factors like age, how long you've been overweight, how heavy you've gotten etc etc etc. I hit 370 at one point, I'm down to 215 today, I've got some sagging skin, but it's not a major deal and hides under my clothing with ease.

Positives, are many, so so many things are way easier now than when I was heavy.

Not sure what surgery you are looking at getting, I was banded in 2011, lost a bit, then didn't... converted from Band to Bypass this past March and I'm down 94+ lbs since March 2nd... Could.Not.Be.Happier.

18 minutes ago, Spg said:

Hi all- I’m new here. This is my first post. I just came home from my In-take appointment into a bariatric program. I’m full of many different feelings at the moment. The bad- am I making the right decision? Will people think I took the “easy way out”, Can I really beat my food addiction? How floppy will my stretched skin be? Etc Then I’m thinking about the positives- walking around the store without being out of breathe and sweaty, not getting the eye when I take the elevator up a flight of stairs because I get out of breathe and my knees hurt, being able to go and walk around car shows with my fiancé and actually have fun, be able to sit on any chairs again, not having to buy 2 airplane seats, bending over to tie my shoes without problems...

so many thoughts are swirling now. I’m sure I’m not the first person to over think this decision. My insurance is allowing for more of a fast tracked program. I could potentially be having the surgery within a few months instead of 6-8 months. I hope to find support and reassurance here.

Thanks for reading!

spg

Ok, here are my top tips for this process.... and most of these address your concerns.

Here's my top 13 tips!

1. Start altering your diet now. Cut out processed food, or at the very least processed sugar. Practice eating your protein first and then focus on non-starchy veggies. Also, start tracking your food. There are lots of apps that make logging very easy. I personally use MyFitnessPal, but there are others out there.
2. Find something that you like to drink that doesn't have calories. Try different caffeine free teas and water additives. I still can't drink plain water....so you want to have something on hand that you know you like.
3. Cut out caffeine. Most programs allow caffeine back in relatively quickly, but caffeine can hinder your body's ability to heal. You don't want to go through caffeine withdrawal along with the aches and pains of surgery.
4. Don't use protein shakes before you absolutely have to! I started supplementing some of my meals with shakes to "prepare myself" for the pre-op diet. Big mistake. You will get to the point where they are DISGUSTING, and you don't want to increase the timeline of that by drinking them before you need to.
5. Start incorporating exercising (even if it’s just walking) somewhere in your daily routine. It will make it easier if it’s already a habit.
6. Practice chewing your food at least 20-30 times before swallowing. Muscle has memory and it will be so much easier if you already have this habit. If you screw up and swallow too soon after surgery, you will pay the price.
7. Set timers and don't drink and eat at the same time.
8. I highly recommend having at least 1 visit with a therapist to establish with someone for after surgery. It’s not required, but everyone seems to have some emotional struggles afterwards. Whether its 2 weeks, 2 months, or 2 years you may struggle with the changes.
9. I personally wouldn't share with people, unless you know they will be 100% supportive. It is nerve wracking already and you need nothing but positivity. Plus it’s a lot of pressure from people who know you've had WLS, versus people who think you are on the weight loss track. People think that the weight is going to melt off after surgery, and sometimes it doesn't. You don't want the extra judgment. Don’t engage people with people who say “WLS is too dramatic” or “You could just diet and lose the weight” or “You aren’t big enough for surgery” or “It’s the easy way out”. SCREW THOSE PEOPLE, they don’t know. They will never know how triumphant our victory will be.
10. I would also remember that you need to make time for you! Make the time to shop healthy, meal prep, cook healthy, and plan ahead. And I’m talking to all the selfless mothers, fathers, husbands, and wives. We give so much to our families, but NOW is the time to focus on ourselves. We are doing it for them, after all. We are doing it to prolong our lives and improve the quality of our lives.
11. Come up with a reward system of sorts. You want to acknowledge your successes. For my 50lb mark, I went and got pedicures with my girlfriends. For my 75lb mark, I bought myself some new dresses. For my 100lb mark, I bought myself a really nice full length mirror.
12. Stalls happen and are completely natural. There are tons of threads in this community that you can search for suggestions or for advice.
13. Hunger happens. Some people don’t experience a decrease in hunger, but it is easily manageable with a small amount of the right foods.

@Spg - I 100% echo everything that @AshAsh1 has said. I think it's great that your plan will allow you to fastrack, but for me personally having that 6 months was truly the defining point. I got myself into a healthy mindset from the beginning of the year and was able to make an informed decision on whether surgery was right for me. Having read everything I could find on the internet to talking to different people in the same position. The more prepared you are both mentally and physically the easier the process will be for you.

This is a lifelong decision and one that truly relies on you to be successful. Don't forget, you have a web full of supporters right here.

My only regret is not doing this sooner. Looking back at photos, I was more than 300 pounds in 2015 and am 152 today - I've lost a whole person. As for the wait, use the time to get your head in the right space. If you do have a food addiction, find a therapist and start the hard work, because the surgery is only a tool. You will get to a point where you will be able to eat the crap again, but you will have to make the choice not to eat the crap (e.g. fast food, chips, etc.)

As others have said - skin will depend on so many things - age, starting weight, where you carry your fat. Mine is livable for now, so long as I'm dressed.

As for what will people think - you control your narrative. You don't have to tell anyone you had surgery. It's up to you and there are entire threads here on the pros and cons of that decision. (I made the decision to not discuss my surgery with anyone other than my medical team, my husband and two daughter and two best friends). Beyond that, I tell everyone the same thing. I have changed my lifestyle. I eat 90-115 grams of protein a day, drink about a gallon or more of water a day, don't eat white flour or added sugars, rarely eat carbs, I work out 6 days a week. When people hear that (every last bit of which is true) they never even begin to think that surgery was part of the equation. I didn't even tell my office - I just said I have to have a procedure and will be out from day x to day z. That decision is yours. Take your time to decide what you want to do.

1 hour ago, MargoCL said:

I think it's great that your plan will allow you to fastrack, but for me personally having that 6 months was truly the defining point. I got myself into a healthy mindset from the beginning of the year and was able to make an informed decision on whether surgery was right for me. Having read everything I could find on the internet to talking to different people in the same position. The more prepared you are both mentally and physically the easier the process will be for you.

This is a lifelong decision and one that truly relies on you to be successful. Don't forget, you have a web full of supporters right here.

I agree with @MargoCL so much. The first clinic I went to (not as medical as claimed) was going to fast track my surgery for 3 months. There was a very limited concept of prep. They also kept focusing on how I was gonna die young because of my weight and forged a lot of false conditions in my chart. I left them after 2 visits.

Second place was associated with a hospital, they were doctors, weight management and endocrine experts, by the book, and helped me pace myself by learning (and unlearning) during my 6-mo insurance mandated period. I learned SO MUCH st a speed I could consume it. All of those questions you had, I had. The time frame really wrapped my head around this. I joined this group three months into that process. Once I found my stride, from April to September - I lost 28 lbs on my own (including vacations, dinners out, and more cooking at home) BEFORE surgery. It wasn’t easy and my family and friends know that.

I learned what protein rich meals looked like. I learned how gooood healthy food can be. I met with my surgeon 3 times and my psychologist who prepared me for: (1) deciding on this step (2) side effects to consider and hobbies to start/maintain (3) options for support since my loved ones are 3,000 miles away (4) managing other people and how to not care (5) how to get help if traumatic memories resurrect.

You have to do what’s right for you, but I’ve been in those shoes and I could have easily posted your post in February when I started. Just know that whatever you decide, choose health. You want to make a change - make the change that’s right for you. And BTW, it’s *not* easy. Once you put in the pre-surgery work, you’ll soon realize that.

Lastly, my mind wasn’t TRULY made up until the week before surgery. In March, I said “I’ll go through this prep time and see how I feel. If I feel like I want to continue on my own AND BE SUCCESSFUL, I’ll call it off.” But the most important thing was to just start. I knew I’d need a support group no matter what though. I realized that I wanted to be out of pain and wanted to be able to start working out again. So, I was sleeved 9/19. I’ve had some recovery bumps because of co-morbid conditions, but my plantar fasciitis and knee pain is gone.

Good luck! ?

Thank you to everyone for the replies- the program said I can take as long as I want to get to surgery. Just that my insurance obligations won’t be a barrier. If I want to take 6 months I can or if I get through all my pre-op appointments sooner I could go in a couple months. My choice. I’m going to try and schedule it around the slower time at work.

I’m only going to address one point you mentioned. It pertains to what people will think about you having this surgery.
WHO FREAKING CARES WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK?!
What other people think about us most often has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH WHO WE ARE.
It is simply what other people think. It doesn’t make it true, important or worth our energy.
I’t took me until my late 30’s to figure this out.

You're a quicker learner than ME. It took 44 years of put-downs I believed because I was raisedmot to make waves, and then freedom to no l9nger t9 buy int9 that wavelet to get free. She I had for so many years my parents daughter, my husband's wife,my children's mother, always a preface tome, to find out. Frustr8 was a person in herself, and others could like and respect ME. Notice I do not say " loved:. I heard that so much in my prior lives it sounds hackeyed now. Too many people claimed that term, then have ran all over me, nearly tromping into the pavement. I thought "victim "was my middle name, but I permitted it. No more, like Popeye says" I Yam What I Yam" and that better be Good Enough.