Hi everyone, I was cleared by the nutritionist last week and waiting for a date. I am getting really worried and confused right now - we have 5 children ages 10-19. Two of them have a mood disorder and are troubled. My husband and I both work full time stressful jobs. I know HOW I got to be obese - I am worried that even after surgery- with all the drama that I cant handle that will still be in my life, am I going to be able to focus on ME, planning meals etc.. thoughts? Just extra overwhelmed these last few weeks.

Is there anyone in your community that can help with your kids for a bit during the week? Do you belong to a church in which members can help you or family nearby?

if not I would suggest contacting the county you live in and see what is available in terms of help. Not sure if your financial situation but maybe you and the husband can hire someone for a few hours out of the day in the morning or evening so you can workout, prepare meals etc.

or maybe your 19 year old can help? Not sure if that’s the one with a mood disorder (or I am unaware of what the disorder entails). It may seem overwhelming but I think anyone can do anything they set their minds too. And I am a firm believe in it takes a village to rear children so reachin out may help. Or who knows, you may find a routine for you that works

I hope you find what you are looking for, good luck

If your kiddos have such problems also reach out ?your local Mental Health Association ---they may also have a support group that can help. Yes it does take a village sometimes but also help should start at home, have a family meeting. You'll I believe find proper resources. Now a big hug, honey, it's going be all right.☝?

Is there anyone in your community that can help with your kids for a bit during the week? Do you belong to a church in which members can help you or family nearby?
if not I would suggest contacting the county you live in and see what is available in terms of help. Not sure if your financial situation but maybe you and the husband can hire someone for a few hours out of the day in the morning or evening so you can workout, prepare meals etc.
or maybe your 19 year old can help? Not sure if that’s the one with a mood disorder (or I am unaware of what the disorder entails). It may seem overwhelming but I think anyone can do anything they set their minds too. And I am a firm believe in it takes a village to rear children so reachin out may help. Or who knows, you may find a routine for you that works
I hope you find what you are looking for, good luck

Such great advice


Yo-Yo Girl from New York City

I am so sorry you are struggling right now.

If you have a busy life, it will just mean that you eat boring food at first. To start with it is just liquids for 2 weeks, no need to prepare food. Buy protein powder, soups, and yogurt.

Meal planning for the later stages can be reasonably simple too. Keep in mind, no matter which surgery you have, you won't be able to eat much. There is a whole section of this forum that includes meal ideas.

You can do it! You got through the pre-op process. In the end you will have so much more energy to deal with your life if you weigh less. Keep going!

21 hours ago, Deb100 said:

Hi everyone, I was cleared by the nutritionist last week and waiting for a date. I am getting really worried and confused right now - we have 5 children ages 10-19. Two of them have a mood disorder and are troubled. My husband and I both work full time stressful jobs. I know HOW I got to be obese - I am worried that even after surgery- with all the drama that I cant handle that will still be in my life, am I going to be able to focus on ME, planning meals etc.. thoughts? Just extra overwhelmed these last few weeks.

This surgery requires a lot of focus and determination. I'm guessing that you have both if you have 5 children, most of which are teenagers. You are probably used to giving everything you have to their needs. But after surgery, you have to add yourself to the list of people. You have to make conscious effort to make good decisions everyday. This includes, shopping, meal planning, meal prepping, exercising. Unfortunately, you can't just eat less and miraculously loose weight. So my suggestion is to make sure you mentally prepare yourself that YOU MATTER and you will have to focus on yourself at times. If your husband has to take the brunt of it for the first few months, then so be it. It would be awesome to hire someone to help out, but not everyone can afford that. Just remember you are doing this for your family, as much as yourself. They will benefit from the new you. It's not selfish to take time for your health.

Thanks everyone - great advice across the board!!