I know its not a major deal but my scales this morning officially kicked me out of obesity. I am simply "overweight" according to the BMI chart. I am quite psyched about this as I have not seen this weight since I got married over 23 years ago. I am having to work harder for each pound lost but determined to loose my last 42 pounds. Weird thing, people around me are telling me not to loose more weight, whats up with that?

Woo Hoo!! Sure, it's a big deal!! Can't wait to be merely overweight, myself! (Only 14 more pounds ).

When people start telling you not to lose any more, it is a good time to take stock of where you actually are. BMI is NOT gospel when it comes to a healthy body.

First metric is waist to height measurement. 6'1 is 73 inches. Your natural waist should be, at most, half that number... 36.5 inches. (Find your natural waist by looking for the area in your side where your ribs and hip bone almost touch. Place the tape measure between the bottom rib and the top of the hip bone. Measure horizontally around that area.. easiest in the mirror). Once you are below that number, then you've reached a healthy size.. and any extra losses are just icing on the cake. (It's not a bad idea to overshoot by an inch or two to guard against a bit of regain).

Of course, the most accurate way is to get a body composition analysis done. They aren't free, but you get very good information from them. (I haven't done this yet.. plan to when I get close to goal).

If you have a particular goal to reach, it's easier to dismiss the concerns of friends and family. "Oh, I haven't reached the healthy waist measurement yet" or "My body fat percentage is still higher than the healthy range". Sounds a lot better than "I wanna get as skinny as I can!" Lol! (I know that's not actually what you say, but hopefully it makes my point clear).

I also hit an overweight BMI today. I started at a BMI of 50 just over a year ago. Congrats to us!

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4 hours ago, Berry78 said:

When people start telling you not to lose any more, it is a good time to take stock of where you actually are. BMI is NOT gospel when it comes to a healthy body.

First metric is waist to height measurement. 6'1 is 73 inches. Your natural waist should be, at most, half that number... 36.5 inches. (Find your natural waist by looking for the area in your side where your ribs and hip bone almost touch. Place the tape measure between the bottom rib and the top of the hip bone. Measure horizontally around that area.. easiest in the mirror). Once you are below that number, then you've reached a healthy size.. and any extra losses are just icing on the cake. (It's not a bad idea to overshoot by an inch or two to guard against a bit of regain).

1 hour ago, FamilyGuyNJ said:

I also hit an overweight BMI today. I started at a BMI of 50 just over a year ago. Congrats to us!

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Berry you are absolutely right about listening to those close to you. That is a interesting perspective using waist to height measurement. I recently moved into a size 34 pant, so I must be pretty close, yet I know I still have some room to go, I think I will reassess my goal in the next 20 pounds.

Congratulations familyguynj, amazing weight loss, well done sir.

Same here! Just hit 28 bmi!

Congrats to both of you!

I totally get what @Berry78 is saying. But I do think that the people closest to you also see you through a filter that isn't always accurate. I know BMI isn't the whole story. If you really truly think you are getting too low in body fat, then I would highly encourage a Dexa body comp. They will give you the true picture of where you are. They aren't that expensive. Most major universities do them in their sports medicine areas. $75-$150, but well worth it in my opinion.

Honestly, for me, the last thing I would want to do is squander my honeymoon period by not losing as much weight as is possible with my given dynamics. So I would/will let that test be my North star, rather than the biased filters coming from fam/friends and even docs/nuts. I have absolutely NO--ZERO interest in going through this march through hell only to stop short of the big finish. I have zero intention of being satisfied with "overweight" after all the angst and hard work. I want to be seriously on the low side of my normal BMI range as determined by the DEXA.

I know that there will be regain. Some put it as high as 20lbs. So I want to account for that in the early days. I also know that after about a year, the fat will redistribute in my body and my face will look fuller, etc. So, if it were me, I'd smile, say "Thank you," and continue with your appointed rounds until YOU are satisfied and feel great in your body. But remember, our brains can also lie--and those bastages DO lie! LOL.

Wow, Fluff, you make it sound like I said for him to not lose another pound!

There is a danger we all face, and it is called Anorexia. Anorexia does not EQUAL being too skinny. Anorexia can LEAD to becoming too skinny. Many of us have a skewed perception when it comes to our body image. When we're heavy, we tend to think we're smaller than we are, but when we get down to a normal weight, the pendulum can swing the other way, where we perceive we're still much too heavy. Feedback from friends and family can be useful to modulate our perceptions.

Thank you for pointing out that friends and family can start getting concerned before it's warranted. That is absolutely true. That's why we need some kind of metric to go by, and the body scans are a super idea. That way it's no one's "perception".. it is actually cold, hard numbers that don't lie.

A size 34 pant, if there is no overhang/love handles/muffin top.. is actually pretty close to ideal for a man who is 6'1. But, lots of guys carry excess above the belt, so "size 34" may not mean much at all.

@Berry78 No hon. Not meaning that at all! Sorry it came out that way to you.

And I agree, the mirror is a TERRIBLE way to judge your endpoint. I also think listening to our fam/friends to determine that endpoint is almost as bad. We absolutely have a skewed sense of reality about our own bodies. Our families have lived/supported us at our heaviest. For most of us, our fam/friends have NEVER experienced us in a skinny/normal frame. We all know that this surgery and the quick wl makes us look drawn initially. So they of course, respond with concern because they don't know as much about this process and surgery as we do--who have lived it for a year of longer. So they start saying out of concern for us continuing to lose without an endpoint, that we're too thin, or look sick, or are too skinny. They are trying to coax us into a reality that is comfortable for them--within their reference frame given their perception and the amount of information they have about weight loss. Cuz, you know, we're supposed to be fluffy and have padding--not bones and definition.

The same for us. I can honestly tell you, I have no earthly idea how I really look. Not to myself, and not to others. I am now feeling so small. Skinny even. *snort* From my mouth to God's ears! LOL! As if! Then I catch a full length glimpse of my reflection in a store window or door and say, "Holy crap! Who is that fat girl?" And I realize, it's me. Then I ask when I got so old and crone-like!? I apply such harsh filters to myself that I would never in a million years think, much less apply to anyone else--especially someone I love or like.

That's why I suggest using an analytical tool that uses empirical data rather than visual filters and interpersonal bias. The DEXA would be my go-to tool for this. I also am educated about the whole regain/maintenance nightmare. My RD told me on Thursday that the struggle is real--as if we don't see that here all the time. She said I could expect a 10-20lb regain between 2-3 years. That it will be very crucial for me to work hard to get it off in the first 6-9 months, because of my medical history and drug situation. I'm on a hormone blocker that shuts down my estrogen/progesterone/androgen conversion.

So that's why I said what I did. And I was definite to explain that it was MY bias I come from and not a rec for @apu. It's a hypothetical for "if this was me."

And in the end, I'm just some schmoe on the internet who has zero real life experience yet with WLS.

((hugs)) girl!

No need to worry about me ladies but I really do appreciate the concern. I am not going to squander my honeymoon period, I am going loose as much as my body will allow but at the same time be mindful of the perceptions of the folks near me. I agree generally folks have terrible self perception issues. My minds eye never correlated to the photos of myself. I was always surprised how unhealthy I looked at my heaviest. I hated getting pictures of myself , now I truly enjoy getting pictures taken with my family.

My target goal weight of a "normal" BMI may be unrealistic as I was always a pretty muscular guy even with all the superficial fat. Nonetheless I will still loose at least another 20 pounds before I need to reassess. Right now I wear a size 34 pant comfortably with no muffin top and I can fit into medium shirts( down from a 2XL shirt and 44 pant) that my svelte 20 and 23 year old boys wear. Wifey wants me to sport some abs, so I guess I have to keep going, especially after subjecting her to the flabs for last couple of decades

Pretty sure we're saying the same thing. The only difference is our comfortable end point.

You want to end (after the 20lb bounce) within a "normal" BMI. If I simply touch down at normal, and bounce into overweight, I'm ok with that.

Part of my reasoning is my own history. I DID touch down at 150lbs for all of a month or so, back when first married. I looked good, too. But, I saw how hard (impossible) that was to maintain, and 170 was a lot more reasonable for me, for long term maintenance. And that was back then. Now I'm looking at all this potential loose skin. If I drop another 60lbs, I couldn't possibly be happy looking in the mirror (I don't think). A bit of padding will help the skin issue.. and ultimately if we're talking HEALTH, I won't see substantial health benefit changes between the 170 and 150 mark. In fact, it's possible that if I were to get sick at some point, having a bit of reserve could come in handy. Don't forget that extra skin has weight too, so you may have a 150lb body, but the scale says 165. 15 pounds of loose skin isn't unheard of.

My hubby once got either strep, or a tick borne illness. (Positive for Strep, negative for tick, but he was SOOO sick.. way sicker than strep usually makes you by its self). He didn't have much excess weight on him to start, and he dropped 40lbs in a month. Looked like a skeleton. Antibiotics kicked in, and he got better.

Sounds like a plan! Guys have it easy... they know when to stop when they can count abs! Lol!

@apu My husband is 6'1", 185 pounds, 34 inch waist (interestingly). Its actually a good weight for him, tho he was 10 pounds lighter in his thirties and forties (53 now), My 6'1" 22 YO son is 200 pounds, 33 inch waist and muscular -- great shape, visible abs. Just two more data points for you.

Edited November 4, 20178 yr by Apple203

Yeah, weight is a difficult measure of healthy body mass for me. I carry a lot of muscle weight in my legs. I was genetically blessed with abnormally muscular legs. Great for a guy but my sister was not particularly thrilled about this gift. It was great in high school when I was a running back. It literally took more than 4 guys to tackle me as my legs had no problem carrying the weight of the additional players piling onto me. Now having powerful legs does nothing for me except mess up my perspective of what weight I should land on

Lol @ imagining you running the field with a bunch of guys piled on your back!

You've done great ! I'm not interested when anyone tells me to stop losing weight other than my mum as I trust her opinion. When I used to diet people use to tell me to stop losing weight when I was still morbidly obese. I can't explain why.. Because I still looked morbidly obese. One friend told me to not get as slim as her. I was no were near but just its a big change when people see you lose weight so drastically but aslong as your healthy and happy keep your goal which changes for a lot of us. People real close to you also may not be used to you being smaller if you've been big so long.