I have a bizarre story and frankly I feel alot of shame. I was a thin kid, but as an adult have gained and lost 70 lbs several times. The last time, I was very healthy...had dieted well and exercised every single day. I was proud of myself so I had a tummy tuck and got rid of bludder from weight gains and losses as well as three pregnancies.

Soo...I felt great. Then the next year I had brachioplasty (arm lift) and breast reduction. I never was happy with the arms, nor the breasts. But then in the last 12 months, I have gained 50 lbs. Breasts of cource look trerrible, and arms do too.

I feel shame that I did these surgeries to my body and then basically threw away the benefits by getting fat again.

My Dr here in the New Orleans area says I am a perfect candidate, even though my BMI is only 34. (I am self pay.)

My main reason for wanting this surgery is not just "losing weight"...I can do that and have done that. My motivation is to get this MONKEY off my back, of constantly obsessing about food, of where my weight is, etc...I want to take this issue out of the realm of my mindset. I am sick of thinking of it.

Is this a good reason to have lap band surgery, to get a bad situation "in check" so that it doesnt consume all my thoughts for the rest of my life? Or will this be just another surgery I regret and feel shame about?

Thanks so much.

:Banane35:

I think you should definitely consider lap band. If you read a lot of the threads here you will find that there are people who have kept weight off for 2, 3 or more years for the first time in their lives. You do not automatically lose weight with the band and you can gain, but what I have gathered from reading this site is that it is much easier to keep the weight off!! I am what bandsters call a low bmi (35) and have had a few people who don't know me say that I am not that heavy and should try dieting. But those who know me no that I have lost weight time and time again just to gain it all back! My family and friends support me because they have seen me struggle over and over. Do not feel guilty about gaining the weight back! Studdies have shown that almost all dieters gain their weight back. The only exception is weight loss surgery patients!!! Studies show that most weight loss surgery patients keep off at least half of the excess weight (both lap band and gastric bypass) I would advise you to read as much as you can on this site and then see about getting that surgery! I have found that very few people on lapbandtalk regret the surgery and many believe it saved their life!

Having the band has really reduced my appetite and made it a lot easier for me to make the right choices. I love mine. Donna

I feel that the lapband is perfect for someone who can lose weight but can't maintain the loss. Being able to lose weight means that you can and will make good eating decisions. The lapband makes it easier to do it long term.

the lapband keeps me from overeating. i dont think about food much anymore.

In the end only you can decide if the lapband is right for you or not. although what the other posters have said is correct. Someone should tell you that the band doesn't do anything for your head issues with weight. I still battle with it every day. Don't get me wrong I love my band and would do it again in a second. The band is only a tool. It is a great tool, but the monkey will still be there.

I'm afraid Chickatee is right--we all have our own monkey demons to deal with, for plenty of reasons.

I too worried that after banding I would succumb to the same old issues--but the best thing about the band is that it is a "lock" I've never had before.

Through all the dieting we've done, we've never had a tool that restricted us from falling back--permanently.

This is what you have to consider--this is a permanent for-the-rest-of-your-life change. At the age of 43, that could be a lon-n-n-g-g time--but believe me, without the band is may be shorter!

Your body is always your decision...

I personaly would sugest getting some counceling. To try and figure out why your over eating.

Thanks so much to all who took the time to write me. I appreciate the kindness. I guess what I am struggling with is feeling like I "don't deserve" the surgery. Like I got myself into this mess...shouldn't I have to fix it? Deep down unworthiness, I suppose. It is funny bc if you look at me from the outside, you'd never know. I am a sucesseful attorney, mom of three, who seems like she has it together. Except for the fact that every time you see her her weight could be up or down 20 lbs from the last time you saw her.

I feel like a loser! And I am sick of feeling like a loser! I wish I could climb into my brain and re-program it so that everything is not contingent upon what I weigh and how "in control" of food I am.

Thanks again, everyone!

I guess what I am struggling with is feeling like I "don't deserve" the surgery. Like I got myself into this mess...shouldn't I have to fix it?

I understand how you are feeling. I have been struggling with my weight for many years now. The one thing you need to understand is that the band is not a magic cure. YOU still have to do the work. It is just a whole lot easier with the band. If the band is what it will take to help you be a success with your weight then you deserve it.

It's only been 5 moths since I had my surgery, but it has been a year since I started this journey. For me it has been very emotional with a lot of ups and downs. You have to be prepared for this.

Are you going to get the opportunity to talk with a counsellor or psychologist to discuss your fears and feelings on unworthiness? The emotional triggers and our own often negative thoughts about ourselves may be separate issues to be addressed first before you start thinking about a Lapband. Surgery won't stop you obsessing about foods if that is what you have always done but counselling may help you to see the patterns in your life/behaviours. The most valuable asset that you have is YOU snappy, please don't ever forget that.

First of all, you have to stop beating yourself up about your weight. We have all made attempts and have failed many, many times. You are worthy of the surgery and you have to beleive that. I agree with what the other people have posted here, the lapband is only a tool and you have to be ready to make that commitment. You already have a sense of defeat about you and the last thing you want to do is set yourself up for failure before you even begin.

I haven't been banded yet. I'm now waiting for insurance approval. I have read so many of the posts here, the good and the bad, so I could be as informed as possible. After doing that and my own research, I decided to set up some aftercare therapy with a therapist that I have seen in the past. I feel that my food issues will not go away once I am banded and I know that I'm going to have to work through that with a therapist. I know that everyone handles things their own way, but, this is something I know I have to do in order to be successful and healthy. I hope that you will consider talking with someone about your feellings. You deserve to be happy and healthy. You can't let your past keep you from being successful in the future.

I wish you the best with this journey!

Jenn

A surgeon said once he has noticed that all lap-band patients go through a process of self-forgiveness before they agree that lap-band is an option for them. Forgiving this "addiction" and realizing that you need help to make a change...seems to be a part of the process.

If they'd only develop a band for the "head hunger" area of our brains! I'm not banded yet (have first appt. 11/2) but I know I'll still be a food addict with the band and will need to battle it the rest of my life

I think anyone with a YO-YO history (that would be...uh....pretty much all of us....) of weight on, weight off, weight on...and then some....weight off... should consider the band. I have been 113, 133, 155, 180, 195, 210, 225, everything in between and bouncing all around for the last 40 years. Up 10, down 15, up 25, down 6, up 20....you get the drift. My BMI was 38 and I was actually only 68 pounds overweight. It has saved my life.

do it. don't look back. i've done the same thing