Well yesterday was my first time going out to eat since my sleeve surgery June 22. Me and my husband went to ruby Tuesday's because he is trying to eat better too. They have an awesome salad bar. When I got there I ordered a water even though I knew I couldn't drink it before eating. I felt awkward looking at the menu since I'm technically still on pureed diet and burnt out on soup. Finally I ordered a side of mashed potatoes loaded. The waitress looked at me strange and asked " is that all for you?" I just said I'm on a soft diet right now because I really didn't want to tell everyone in the restaurant about my surgery. Once she brought it out and said " will that be enough" and I told her yes plenty. I removed the butter and sour cream and nibbled on the potatoes, cheese, and bacon. It tasted great. I only ate a couple bites and the waitress asked again " are your potatoes ok?" I told her they were great and asked for a box. I enjoyed the time out with my husband and we talked and had a good time but it was just awkward having to explain why I wasn't eating. I know she was doing her job she was a nice waitress and I'm sure she was thinking why is this big girl not eating. Anybody else feel like this going out?

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I have developed a couple tricks, I have only once been questioned by a waiter about the food quality and if my food was okay.

First, ask for a to go container from the get go. I just always say "I know I'm going to need one anyway. Then put your portion your not eating out of sight and your plate looks cleared.

Also I do a lot of moving of food around my plate so it looks like I ate more than I did.

Also sometimes if my hubby orders the same type of thing, I will put some of my left overs on his plate so then nobody questions it.

Finally I always ask if they have a smaller portion or lighter fare menu so that I'm not ordering as much food to begin with. If it's close to lunch hours I ask for the lunch portion since it's usually smaller.

Edited July 14, 20179 yr by Sullie06

On ‎7‎/‎12‎/‎2017 at 8:10 AM, K_aane said:

I wonder what it will be like to go out after I am losing weight because we go to the same places and see the same waitress. (Being fat supports alot of jobs )...lol
Hubby says babe you can't hide it when your body changes people will notice.
I am kinda excited and hope I just manage a big smile and say, "I am hoping to just share some of his food and not get my fingers bit off".
Hehee. ...big smile,,,big smile!
Surgery 7-21

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When people ask who I don't feel like sharing my surgery with I tell them that I am doing portion control, high protein, low carb, clean eating and hitting the gym. That satisfies most peoples questions and many are like I'm going to try that. My hubby followed that plan, no surgery and dropped 64 pounds so it's possible.

You are right. It is not their business! I came to the decision about surgery when I had tried every diet known to man and failed over and over. Sure, I lost some weight, but it always came back.

My surgery for a VSG is on 7/25/17. This has been quite a journey. Over 6 months. Started with the insurance and received approval right away! I have comorbidities like, high blood pressure, pre diabetes and fatty liver (which are all supposed to reverse with this. My starting weight was 315 and I am 4 days into the pre surgery liquid diet for 2 weeks (aaaaaaahhhhh!) and I am already 300! so that is positive reenforcement! I want to get to 150 and we shall see!!!

Are you planning any plastic surgery? I think a tummy tuck will be something I will save for. You can't do any surgery until you are at or almost at goal weight 1 to 2 years down the line. I had cesareans for my 2 children and they say that makes the tummy tuck easier. Also upper arms and loose skin. I am swimming every day and after surgery will do the treadmill. Wish me luck!

You are right. It is not their business! I came to the decision about surgery when I had tried every diet known to man and failed over and over. Sure, I lost some weight, but it always came back.
My surgery for a VSG is on 7/25/17. This has been quite a journey. Over 6 months. Started with the insurance and received approval right away! I have comorbidities like, high blood pressure, pre diabetes and fatty liver (which are all supposed to reverse with this. My starting weight was 315 and I am 4 days into the pre surgery liquid diet for 2 weeks (aaaaaaahhhhh!) and I am already 300! so that is positive reenforcement! I want to get to 150 and we shall see!!!
Are you planning any plastic surgery? I think a tummy tuck will be something I will save for. You can't do any surgery until you are at or almost at goal weight 1 to 2 years down the line. I had cesareans for my 2 children and they say that makes the tummy tuck easier. Also upper arms and loose skin. I am swimming every day and after surgery will do the treadmill. Wish me luck!

I am 7-21 265 and want to get to 125. you Can do it, we can do it! !!![emoji6]

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I can't believe people are complaining about a waitress actually doing her job, properly. If most people are not eating their food, they are usually not happy with it. It is the servers job to make sure people are enjoying their food and it was prepared properly. It isn't the server fault that someone had surgery and can't eat. I still don't get why people insist on going out when they can't even make a dent in the food then get pissy when people notice. You choose this no one else. The rest of the world is not required to adapt to you.

The smaller you get physically the easier it gets. At the size I am now, when I 1/2 eat my food no one is surprised, lol. When I ask for a box, no one cares. Thin women don't eat a lot and people don't expect them to. Also at 2 years out, I can eat enough when I am out that no one even notices. You would never know I had surgery.

I feel like post-op a lot of us put ourselves in a lot of awkward and uncomfortable situations that are not necessary just to try and still fit into a certain mold. The problem is that mold is, it is the one that allowed you to get obese in the first place. There is nothing wrong with being a different person with different habits. Don't be afraid to change and be a difference person. Long term it makes life easier to make choices that align with a healthy lifestyle.

The one person that was semi close to me that had WLS before me. She never changed her lifestyle. She still went out to eat with her family to the same restaurant, ordered the same food and just ate less. She never got to goal, never got under 200 pounds (she started close to 400 pounds) bottoming out at 250 and then regained 50 pounds and is now sitting around 300. Now years later she is trying to adapt a healthy lifestyle and lose her regain and then some.

It is much hard years out to change your habits, it is much easier to change them early on and then stick them.

3 hours ago, Alice12151 said:

You are right. It is not their business! I came to the decision about surgery when I had tried every diet known to man and failed over and over. Sure, I lost some weight, but it always came back.

My surgery for a VSG is on 7/25/17. This has been quite a journey. Over 6 months. Started with the insurance and received approval right away! I have comorbidities like, high blood pressure, pre diabetes and fatty liver (which are all supposed to reverse with this. My starting weight was 315 and I am 4 days into the pre surgery liquid diet for 2 weeks (aaaaaaahhhhh!) and I am already 300! so that is positive reenforcement! I want to get to 150 and we shall see!!!

Are you planning any plastic surgery? I think a tummy tuck will be something I will save for. You can't do any surgery until you are at or almost at goal weight 1 to 2 years down the line. I had cesareans for my 2 children and they say that makes the tummy tuck easier. Also upper arms and loose skin. I am swimming every day and after surgery will do the treadmill. Wish me luck!

I've been thinking about saving to have my boobs done. My stomach is a mess but I can live with it, I look good in clothing as this point and I'm not ever planning on a bikini. My upper arms are horrible but I have seen that surgery done and heard it's super painful but my boobs....disaster!

Edited July 14, 20179 yr by Sullie06

I'm getting boobsickles gotta get them fixed

So I've now had another restaurant experience. I did get permission from my surgeon. I am one month out . We went to the longhorn. I ordered a filet because I thought it would be very tender. I was right. I ate less than half of my 6 ounce steak and a few bites of a sweet potato. It was delicious and set well. The problem for me is that I think it somehow triggered my head hunger. I have wanted to munch since dinner. I had a little carb smart ice cream. I know I wasn't hungry. I still felt full but I wanted something sweet! Anyone else experienced something like this? Very frustrating and a little scary for me.


Mich W
Hw 223, SW 217 CW 199 GW 135

So I've now had another restaurant experience. I did get permission from my surgeon. I am one month out . We went to the longhorn. I ordered a filet because I thought it would be very tender. I was right. I ate less than half of my 6 ounce steak and a few bites of a sweet potato. It was delicious and set well. The problem for me is that I think it somehow triggered my head hunger. I have wanted to munch since dinner. I had a little carb smart ice cream. I know I wasn't hungry. I still felt full but I wanted something sweet! Anyone else experienced something like this? Very frustrating and a little scary for me.


Mich W
Hw 223, SW 217 CW 199 GW 135

Could have been head hunger, but for me it would likely have been the couple bites of sweet potato. There are some of us who can't do carbs in moderation because they trigger more carbs cravings so abstinence is better till we are in maintenance.

I still just don't do bread, rice, pasta, etc and eat other carbs sparingly except for fruit because they will start my cravings. I'm four years out.

I think you are right! Back in the wagon today!


Mich W
Hw 223, SW 217 CW 199 GW 135

On 09/07/2017 at 7:14 PM, Diana_in_Philly said:

I would have mentioned to the manager that the waitress was asking about the food in a way that made you uncomfortable so retraining could be done.

That is the most dramatic thing I have heard today. " Manager your waitress wanted to make sure my food was good, please retrain her as a point of urgency" Funny

I am sorry but the waitress is not responsible for every humans feelings to a simple question she asks every single person on a daily basis if she notices they are not eating much food, as most of the time it means the food is not good. How was she to know this was not the case for this one person lol cut the woman some slack, she was just trying to do a job to a good standard.

I am 13 weeks out and have only been to a restaurant for a meal twice - why? Because it's a waste of my time and money.

Both were special occasions for other people. The first time I didn't order and asked my friend if I could share her meal (she is skinny and never finishes anything).

The second time was at a tapas style place, so it's almost impossible to track who's eating what.

I would never have an issue with a server being attentive - in fact, I would thank and appreciate that person for doing a great job given not eating usually signals dissatisfaction. You don't have to talk about your personal business nor does anyone care about your personal business to let the person know your food is great and you're not eating it.

That said, my friends all know that I had surgery so we do a lot less eating-out type of activities anyway.

I went out out to eat at Red Lobster last night. Told the waiter that me and my 13 y.o. Daughter were sharing a plate. Also ordered lobster bisque on the side. All in all, ate 1/3 of my lobster bisque, and 3 bites of her baked potato. She ate the rest. We had to get to go boxes. When the waiter asked me if I enjoyed everything, I said it was delicious! It was. I don't care what people think of me, but I love the cost savings at this point.

We stay away from pasta and buttery dishes. If we go out to dinner, I order grilled fish or a bun lessburger, and my husband orders a salad and we share with no explanation to anyone. I don't think we ever leave without a go box. My husband being a long time diabetic, potatoes, pasta and carbohydrates are never eaten. My husband has kept off 100 lbs for four years, but if we strayed into certain restaurants like yummy Olive Garden, it would be disastrous. I lost sixty lbs, regained 30, even though we rarely eat out and have no trigger foods in our house, I struggle daily. I eat less than my husband but nothing works. Two years post sleeve I started regaining. I envy people who get the weight off and it stays off. This sleeve wasn't so magic like it was in the beginning. I am still dieting and having vitamin deficiencies.