So, I normally have a very laid back work environment when it comes to time off etc..... well the last few months we have been short handed in my specific department, basically relying on an unreliable part time person to cover us when we are out. It's just me and another full time co worker who shares a big office. So when I got my surgery date of Feb 13, I immediately told my boss who said that's fine, we will figure it out. Didn't ask questions, as I am trying to avoid telling anyone at work what I am having done. Well, when I went in and told my co worker to mark it on her calendar she starts asking me over and over "what kind of surgery are you having? I told her it was personal and I didn't want to discuss, she then proceeds to ask if I can reschedule it for a later date because that is not the best week to miss because they don't know if our part time person can work. I said no. So she then proceeds not to even add it to the calendar and gives me the silent treatment the rest of the day and the next day. Well I was over it, and was doing fine until the part time worker came in trying to make me feel bad for scheduling to be off that week and the week after because she was going to "spend the whole month of feb" at the beach and "there goes my plan". I just got up and walked away.

My husband and close friends who know what I am having done tell me not to worry about them, that I gave plenty of notice (almost 2 months) and that it's not my problem they don't have my department staffed correctly. I just hate letting people down and it's getting in the way of me being excited to get this done. Something I have been wanting for a year and a half. Any advice ?? Sorry for the long post.

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As long as you get a Dr's note that he requires you to take time off. Legally work must approved and keep your job for you. Be sure to give the note to HR and let them know you do not want to disclose your surgery to anyone. I took 1 month off ( my Dr approved). I signed up for short term disability. This time really helped me take time to focus on healing, my diet, and life style.

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If you qualify for FMLA, then they must give you leave. However, if you don't, if your company is too small or you haven't worked there a year, or you don't work enough hours, then they don't have to let you go.

Outside FMLA and ADA, "An employer does not have to provide any accommodation that may be an undue hardship. Having you out of work for some period of time might constitute an undue hardship for the employer. That will depend a lot on the size of the employer, what job you do, and what options the employer has for covering your work while you are out. "

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Edited January 2, 20179 yr by Vinasu

I dont see why you would feel like you are letting anyone down, your boss already gave you the green light, so dont stress over it, you have other things to worry about, it sounds very unproffesional on their part to be acting that way.

Worst case scenario, consider telling her what surgery it is

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I know all about fmla. And I do qualify for it since I have been at this job for many years. I'm not concerned with being approved to be off it's more about my fellow co workers and the way they are acting towards me. There is no way I will ever tell my co worker what I am having done. She will tell everyone she comes across in the company as I have witnessed it before with other people in the company with health issues that have confided in her, but I do know she will continue to be nosy and ask questions until I take my leave. I have been there when they had to take off for extended periods of time, I guess they forget about that so easily. I'm trying not to worry about, but it does cause a lot of tension in the office.

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Advice: ignore those aholes! They need to grow up; you've done this as professionally as possible, your boss is ok with it, so the co-worker and the part-timer will get over it, and if they don't, their prob not yours.

And as far as the whiny part timer not being able to spend Feb at the beach....just think in your head "first-world problems babe."

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So, I normally have a very laid back work environment when it comes to time off etc..... well the last few months we have been short handed in my specific department, basically relying on an unreliable part time person to cover us when we are out. It's just me and another full time co worker who shares a big office. So when I got my surgery date of Feb 13, I immediately told my boss who said that's fine, we will figure it out. Didn't ask questions, as I am trying to avoid telling anyone at work what I am having done. Well, when I went in and told my co worker to mark it on her calendar she starts asking me over and over "what kind of surgery are you having? I told her it was personal and I didn't want to discuss, she then proceeds to ask if I can reschedule it for a later date because that is not the best week to miss because they don't know if our part time person can work. I said no. So she then proceeds not to even add it to the calendar and gives me the silent treatment the rest of the day and the next day. Well I was over it, and was doing fine until the part time worker came in trying to make me feel bad for scheduling to be off that week and the week after because she was going to "spend the whole month of feb" at the beach and "there goes my plan". I just got up and walked away.

My husband and close friends who know what I am having done tell me not to worry about them, that I gave plenty of notice (almost 2 months) and that it's not my problem they don't have my department staffed correctly. I just hate letting people down and it's getting in the way of me being excited to get this done. Something I have been wanting for a year and a half. Any advice ?? Sorry for the long post.

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You sound like me!!! Don't want to let anyone down...well, this time...you need to take care of YOU!!! Sometimes ya just gotta do what you need to do????

Funny thing, I kinda went through the same situation but after rescheduling my operation two times due to death in co-workers families. I put my foot down and said that's it I'm not changing it no more and took one month off. You can not feel bad at all, you come first. Beach day can wait until u come back that is not important.

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It's time to take care of you. Don't concern yourself with the office. AND don't tell anyone what you're doing, it's your business. Legally they can't ask you personal questions about your medical condition. Let them hire a temp or whatever... I know you feel obligated, but 2 months notice is more than enough. And that part-time chick needs to be replaced. She is NOT a team player whatsoever.

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I am currently in the same boat but I had a hysterectomy about a year ago and they were worse then it's absolutely ridiculous!

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So I have an update and that part time worker literally just called me here at the office and flat out asked me to reschedule, I told her no and she asked why I couldn't reschedule it.

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I'm sure it's hard to not smack the crap out of them but the situation is between you and your boss. They're just static! Ignore them. If all is well with management everyone else has to accept it! Focus on yourself!

Countess531

So, I normally have a very laid back work environment when it comes to time off etc..... well the last few months we have been short handed in my specific department, basically relying on an unreliable part time person to cover us when we are out. It's just me and another full time co worker who shares a big office. So when I got my surgery date of Feb 13, I immediately told my boss who said that's fine, we will figure it out. Didn't ask questions, as I am trying to avoid telling anyone at work what I am having done. Well, when I went in and told my co worker to mark it on her calendar she starts asking me over and over "what kind of surgery are you having? I told her it was personal and I didn't want to discuss, she then proceeds to ask if I can reschedule it for a later date because that is not the best week to miss because they don't know if our part time person can work. I said no. So she then proceeds not to even add it to the calendar and gives me the silent treatment the rest of the day and the next day. Well I was over it, and was doing fine until the part time worker came in trying to make me feel bad for scheduling to be off that week and the week after because she was going to "spend the whole month of feb" at the beach and "there goes my plan". I just got up and walked away.

My husband and close friends who know what I am having done tell me not to worry about them, that I gave plenty of notice (almost 2 months) and that it's not my problem they don't have my department staffed correctly. I just hate letting people down and it's getting in the way of me being excited to get this done. Something I have been wanting for a year and a half. Any advice ?? Sorry for the long post.

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So not cool! I know exactly how you feel. I just started a job in September 2016 and I already have to ask for time off for the surgery which is on February 6th 2017... and we are understaffed as well and I felt so guilty for having to ask for time off. And I try to tell myself it's not my fault they don't hire more help. But I totally feel guilty even though I know it's completely moronic because obviously my health comes first. It's a tough one but ultimately you come first. And the beach will always be there so they can just go to the beach another time. Please don't feel like you have to explain yourself to them.