Hi everyone,

I'm a single (divorced) mom of a 2 year old (27months). He is a big guy-- 3ft, 38lbs!

His dad now lives in another state and my family is all in NY/NJ. I already pay $2k/month for daycare (yep daycare in DC is more expensive than the avg college), and I can't afford the added expense of a full time live in nanny.

His aftercare nanny will have him at her house while I'm the hospital and take him to daycare with her when she goes to work (she's a teacher at the daycare). Unfortunately she has kids herself and so can't come to my house to do morning and bedtime routines my first week back.

My close friends will all chip in, especially the first week/ weekend, but they are all busy professionals and I'm afraid they can't guarantee something won't come up. I'm working on a schedule for 4/5 friends to come over to help on the weekends and a bit during the week, and will pay someone else to come over in the mornings to get him ready and drop him off at daycare, then pick him up, bring him home feed him , prep lunchbox for next day and get him ready for bed M-F..

For those of you with small children-- My question is-- when will I be able to pick up/ care for my son-- reasonably?! I know the doc says 4-6weeks for lifting, but I absolutely cannot afford a live in nanny plus daycare or rely on friends for that long. I am 100% committed to figuring this out but it is scary as hell!

Thanks in advance for your advice.

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Can he climb? After my c-section six months ago I had my second child who is 3 stand up on a chair, foot stool or lounge so I could hug him. As for dressing him I found that hard, but I dressed him while I sat down. I'll be doing fire this recovery as well . The dr said that recovery will be smilliar to a c-section. I don't know, I was also told not to lift.

Following. I asked a similar question a couple months ago but not much response. I too have a 2yr old and should be getting surgery late this month

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I have a 9 month old and a 9yr old and my husband works 6days granted he's taking 3 days off in the beginning, and I have my close friends helping me 2days as well. But man its rough figuring that part all out. Best of luck!

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Following. I also have a 2 year old.

I can & I will

I'm not a mom but I have juvenile onset rheumatoid arthritis and attended some conferences about it which included parenting techniques when you're too disabled to lift, etc one thing I remember from it was taking your toddler about the house in a parasol stroller

Also use a stomach binder to assist with movements

I. Sure you understand the need to not lift is due to not only the external incisions but mostly the internal stitching and healing.so please get as much help as possible and improvise improvise improvise with your little one....

Wish I could be of more help

Thanks! A stool, stroller and stomach binder are good advice

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i'm 2 weeks out from RNY my son is 2 i've watched him all day on my own since i got home from surgery, he just climbs himself wherever i want him to go, also i switched him to a bed instead of crib just to make it so i could put him down for a nap. he even climbs up on his car seat in the car

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i can't lift more than 5 pounds for 6 weeks

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@@gigiinDC It's important to not lift for at least 4-6 weeks. You risk hernias. Hope it all works out!!!

I had a two year old when I had my surgery last December. I was nervous too, especially with the lifting restrictions but it went great. I had help the first week but after day 7 it was all me. They say not to lift more than 15 pounds but I ended up cheating on that and I had no problems. Im not suggesting going against doctors orders but I just did what I had to do and it was much easier than I thought it would be. Ask your kid to climb up into car seats and put dinner plates where they can easily reach it so you can skip high chairs. The moving around cleaning up and getting kids ready for school, etc. went easy peasy. I was ready to get back into the routine after 6 days of laying around.

Sleeved 09/06/16. Have a toddler who just turned 3. She climbed. I held her hands and she climbed into her chair, onto the couch, into the tub ( carefully of

course). They are at an age where they love to help so make it a game for them.

My challenge was the tiredness I felt. So for a while she was laying in bed with me watching some tv ( normally don't do) and iPad time. Worth it.

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My baby girl is 2.5 and she is 38lbs and 39in. I had help from family luckily... but I'm not able to fully lift her yet. I was sleeved on 9/12. I have a 1.5yr old who's 32in and 27lbs. I'm able to pick her up now and carry her. So maybe by week 5 or six. It's hard but fortunately my oldest listens most of the time. I honestly limit my time out with them because I'm worried if she throws her tantrums while we are out, I won't be able to carry her. Just be patient and talk your son through it. My daughter was as understanding as a toddler could be about mommy having a boo boo and can't pick her up.

Good luck! Best wishes

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Thanks so much for the replies! I'm going to have my son start climbing into everything now so that h is used to it by my surgery date

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Good suggestions. I have a small 2.5 year old (23lbs) that wants to be held a lot but shes really into boo boo stuff ao hopefully that angle works. I just paid my deposit for surgery in TJ next week

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