Sorry, this post has nothing to do with the topic title.

I noticed I was at my 999th post and I wanted this, my 1000th post, to wish everyone a great day and keep up the excellent work you have been doing on your WLS journeys.

I didn't want to use this on answering a question such as:

"Is it ok to eat plywood only 1 week after bariatric WLS?"

"After reading 9,872 articles about post surgery 3 week weight loss stalls, is my stall normal at 21 days?"

"Is it ok if I (whatever obvious thing we are not supposed to do, that has been published not to do by respectable sources or explained not to do by our surgeon, nutritionist, bariatric nurse, etc.)? I know the answer is no, but I am hoping that someone with no medical background or any knowledge of my medical condition vindicates my harmful and dangerous actions."

Have a wonderful day!

PS. Shame on you if you thought this post was going to match the title.

Edited June 29, 201610 yr by 4MRB4PHOTO

So disappointed. I LOVE having wild passionate sex WITH monkeys

Sent from my SM-G920T using the BariatricPal App

@4MRB4PHOTO - this title was mean. I think someone should be salacious and hijack this post.

I'll start

Dear Penthouse,

I never thought this would happen to me...

I'll finish this when I get close to post 2000

Now to make good on my threat...

Dear Penthouse,

I never thought this would happen to me. Less than two years ago, I was over 300 pounds. I had a girl friend, and while I enjoyed our moments of passion together, it was embarrassing being sweaty and out of breath. Then I did something radical. After hearing a pod cast about being fat in America I heard about the success rates with WLS. I remember saying BS when I heard the stats, but dang if they were not true.

So I signed up. Went to Mexico and had a big hunk of my stomach permanently removed.

Now this is where it gets salacious. After two months I lost a tremendous amount of weight. I was actually getting close to the size I was in college. As you might imagine, this did wonders for my confidence. But what I didn't know is my body was dumpling hormones at the rate of incredible out of my fat cells. So I am now experiencing Adolescences part II. But this time I know what I am doing.

I don't know if I was releasing a pheromone cloud, but every first date I would end up in bed with someone. It was absolutely wild. Do I recommend it? NO. Was it fun at the time? Well yeah, because it was new, novel and your self estimime takes such a hit being fat, that suddenly being attractive is a rush.

After a while I found myself with an odd little "harem." I had 5 women who didn't want a relationship, but enjoyed other things. Where was this when I was 17? It got complicated. One day I was literally with three different women. But thanks to the hormone dump aided adolescences, that really wasn't a problem even in my 50's.

The stupidity of this situation finally dawned on me, and I broke up the band. I met "the ONE." The most emotionally healthy woman I know. Beautiful, intelligent, and makes me feel more at peace than anyone...ever.

So moral of the story...quality trumps quantity anytime and I think I can prove it. Enjoy the journey.

So.... This was post 1,999. I can't WAIT to hear what #2000 brings, @@OKCPirate !!!

@4MRB4PHOTO - this title was mean. I think someone should be salacious and hijack this post.

I'll start

Dear Penthouse,

I never thought this would happen to me...

I'll finish this when I get close to post 2000

Now to make good on my threat...

Dear Penthouse,

I never thought this would happen to me. Less than two years ago, I was over 300 pounds. I had a girl friend, and while I enjoyed our moments of passion together, it was embarrassing being sweaty and out of breath. Then I did something radical. After hearing a pod cast about being fat in America I heard about the success rates with WLS. I remember saying BS when I heard the stats, but dang if they were not true.

So I signed up. Went to Mexico and had a big hunk of my stomach permanently removed.

Now this is where it gets salacious. After two months I lost a tremendous amount of weight. I was actually getting close to the size I was in college. As you might imagine, this did wonders for my confidence. But what I didn't know is my body was dumpling hormones at the rate of incredible out of my fat cells. So I am now experiencing Adolescences part II. But this time I know what I am doing.

I don't know if I was releasing a pheromone cloud, but every first date I would end up in bed with someone. It was absolutely wild. Do I recommend it? NO. Was it fun at the time? Well yeah, because it was new, novel and your self estimime takes such a hit being fat, that suddenly being attractive is a rush.

After a while I found myself with an odd little "harem." I had 5 women who didn't want a relationship, but enjoyed other things. Where was this when I was 17? It got complicated. One day I was literally with three different women. But thanks to the hormone dump aided adolescences, that really wasn't a problem even in my 50's.

The stupidity of this situation finally dawned on me, and I broke up the band. I met "the ONE." The most emotionally healthy woman I know. Beautiful, intelligent, and makes me feel more at peace than anyone...ever.

So moral of the story...quality trumps quantity anytime and I think I can prove it. Enjoy the journey.

DUDE!!! You screwed the pooch!!!

This was your 2000th post? MAN. You should be voted off the island.

I always found comfort by reading through this section...http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/195065-you-know-you-lost-weight-when/

I could really relate and it reminded me why I was doing this. It is about you, your health and living life abundently. Others can't do that for you, you have to do it yourself.

It has been and continues to be a great journey for me. Good luck.

This was your 2000th post? MAN. You should be voted off the island.

I always found comfort by reading through this section...http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/195065-you-know-you-lost-weight-when/

I could really relate and it reminded me why I was doing this. It is about you, your health and living life abundently. Others can't do that for you, you have to do it yourself.

It has been and continues to be a great journey for me. Good luck.

I was thinking about it, and I could not think of anything better than encouraging someone who was considering WLS. I thought it was very appropriate.

This was your 2000th post? MAN. You should be voted off the island.

I always found comfort by reading through this section...http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/195065-you-know-you-lost-weight-when/

I could really relate and it reminded me why I was doing this. It is about you, your health and living life abundently. Others can't do that for you, you have to do it yourself.

It has been and continues to be a great journey for me. Good luck.

I was thinking about it, and I could not think of anything better than encouraging someone who was considering WLS. I thought it was very appropriate.

You promised SMUT, not logic!!! Dangit!!

@@LipstickLady - oh that's on the Monkey Love page.

I thought it very appropriate to have post 2000 to be an encouragement to a genuine seeker on this page: http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/373059-getting-pretty-nervousany-advice/

I can do a couple of things for this forum...I can encourage and I can research. I am not as good at tough love as others, so I try to stick to my strengths.

Poor @Alex has had to kick a number of people off for being inappropriate, so I tried to keep it PG-13. Now if you want pictures and more details, PM me. It was a wonderful time and surprisingly well documented.

@@LipstickLady - oh that's on the Monkey Love page.

I thought it very appropriate to have post 2000 to be an encouragement to a genuine seeker on this page: http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/373059-getting-pretty-nervousany-advice/

I can do a couple of things for this forum...I can encourage and I can research. I am not as good at tough love as others, so I try to stick to my strengths.

Poor @Alex has had to kick a number of people off for being inappropriate, so I tried to keep it PG-13. Now if you want pictures and more details, PM me. It was a wonderful time and surprisingly well documented.

Sigh. Ok. You can stay.

If it weren't for @@Christinamo7, who hit my earlier post with a "like" today, I would have come back, so "Thank you," Christina. I hope I remembered for blue-name format.

REALLY MBPHOTOMAN:

I am sorry to mislead you. Here's a picture of some monkey love:

(Don't get technical on me, they are probably considered apes).

I appreciate your peace offering. They are indeed apes, but that surely is love. All is forgiven.

Here, let me help you. More potential here:

animaldunia_love_6_monkey.jpg

True, frisky monkeys. I can't tell if they're in love, but I sure am.

But what I didn't know is my body was dumpling hormones at the rate of incredible out of my fat cells. So I am now experiencing Adolescences part II. But this time I know what I am doing.

My favorite part, your hormone dumplings. How dear. The adolescent lurks within you, a befuddled kid forever.

But what I didn't know is my body was dumpling hormones at the rate of incredible out of my fat cells. So I am now experiencing Adolescences part II. But this time I know what I am doing.

My favorite part, your hormone dumplings. How dear. The adolescent lurks within you, a befuddled kid forever.

Umm are not all guys?

@@OKCPirate -- "Umm are not all guys?"

That is true, but not all also exhibit the analytical, orderly-minded side that you show. It's more fun to see the goofy, clueless kid in someone of your...hmm...persuasion.

@4MRB4PHOTO - this title was mean. I think someone should be salacious and hijack this post.

I'll start

Dear Penthouse,

I never thought this would happen to me...

I'll finish this when I get close to post 2000

Now to make good on my threat...

Dear Penthouse,

I never thought this would happen to me. Less than two years ago, I was over 300 pounds. I had a girl friend, and while I enjoyed our moments of passion together, it was embarrassing being sweaty and out of breath. Then I did something radical. After hearing a pod cast about being fat in America I heard about the success rates with WLS. I remember saying BS when I heard the stats, but dang if they were not true.

So I signed up. Went to Mexico and had a big hunk of my stomach permanently removed.

Now this is where it gets salacious. After two months I lost a tremendous amount of weight. I was actually getting close to the size I was in college. As you might imagine, this did wonders for my confidence. But what I didn't know is my body was dumpling hormones at the rate of incredible out of my fat cells. So I am now experiencing Adolescences part II. But this time I know what I am doing.

I don't know if I was releasing a pheromone cloud, but every first date I would end up in bed with someone. It was absolutely wild. Do I recommend it? NO. Was it fun at the time? Well yeah, because it was new, novel and your self estimime takes such a hit being fat, that suddenly being attractive is a rush.

After a while I found myself with an odd little "harem." I had 5 women who didn't want a relationship, but enjoyed other things. Where was this when I was 17? It got complicated. One day I was literally with three different women. But thanks to the hormone dump aided adolescences, that really wasn't a problem even in my 50's.

The stupidity of this situation finally dawned on me, and I broke up the band. I met "the ONE." The most emotionally healthy woman I know. Beautiful, intelligent, and makes me feel more at peace than anyone...ever.

So moral of the story...quality trumps quantity anytime and I think I can prove it. Enjoy the journey.

Heavy and tired of it.

Took decisive action to change.

Achieved the results.

Lived like a rock star, eh ?

Harem.

Broke up the band.

The One was found.

Great progression towards happiness, man.