Hey everyone,

I am new to this. I will be sleeved (fingers crossed) on June 27th 2016. Dr. Amit trivedi in Paramus, NJ. will be my surgeon. I have not told ANY of my friends, only my hubby and my younger sister know. I don't know when I am going to start telling my friends. I defiantly need some support, so I figured I would come on here and share my story and hear someone else's. I have to admit that the closer I am getting to the date, the more nervous I am becoming. I wish I could talk to my friends, but I don't think I can. Not yet, anyway. When did you guys let your friends know? how did they take it? I have seen a lot that friendships change after surgery. I guess I am afraid of that! But I am so ready to be HEALTHY.

KenZay

I haven't told anyone outside my Husband and my Supervisor at work, whom I did ask for strict confidence on...

NO One knows, I am not prepared for what may come, I am so not ready for the "taken the easy way out" comments

and the talk.

I know I cant stop it, so I have to prepare Myself for it, and that means Loving myself More than they may talk, Protecting the

Person I am at all cost by choosing to RISE above their judgments...

Stand Strong My friend you are not alone~

I told my close friends, but they live out of state. The one semi local friend I told, told other people, this was pre-op. I ended up telling her I didn't have surgery.

My friends that know, are my REAL friends, they are supportive and not telling everyone they know and not doing stuff like outing me on social media (although I don't talk about my weight loss at all on social media, so there is no reason to out me. I'm not trying to sell body wraps).

Almost all of my close friends low carb or so some kind of low carb diet. The way I eat to them isn't abnormal. When I was recently visiting a friend, they had their house stocked with all the Proteins and low carb goodies, because that is how they normally eat. We went to a lot of local restaurants with farm fresh ingredients and tons of healthy or healthier options.

I have other friends that are just intersted in eating fast food and bad foods. Surgery has kind of tiered my friends off in a way. The ones that are healthier and into a healthy active lifestyle are easier to relate to and I gravitate to them more. My other friends just don't fit into my life and I don't really fit into theirs. When you are making good choices, and other people are making bad choices and they feel internally guilty, they can project that onto you. And this is all without people even knowing I had surgery, this is just me being Iron clad about my low carbing.

I think it is best to keep it private until you have a handle on things. You don't need the extra stress of people being assholes, or asking you a million questions even if they are well meaning. I think once you are past 6 months, if you want to tell people, tell them. It takes a lot of time and effort to get adjusted to your new stomach, and you need to concentrate on that and not other peoples issues.

BTW, I had a surgery buddy I found on this site, who had surgery the day before me. We used to text every day for the first 3 months or so, that really helped me a lot. We still keep in touch but at almost a year we don't need the same support level.

Edited June 1, 201610 yr by OutsideMatchInside

Only my live-in BF knows, am a very private person.

One of my favorite quotes is fro Benjamin Franklin.

"To whom thy secrets thou doest tell, to him thy freedom thou doest sell."

When anyone makes the "easy way" comment I tell them that diet & exercise have an 8% long-term success rate. Surgery has a 73% success rate. I didn't choose the easy way, I chose the smart way.

When anyone makes the "easy way" comment I tell them that diet & exercise have an 8% long-term success rate. Surgery has a 73% success rate. I didn't choose the easy way, I chose the smart way.

Saving this for a later date....

When anyone makes the "easy way" comment I tell them that diet & exercise have an 8% long-term success rate. Surgery has a 73% success rate. I didn't choose the easy way, I chose the smart way.

8% is generous...more like less than 5%.

Im there with you only my husband , daughter, mom and my besf friend know they are very supportive, as for the rest of the people is none of their business you can always say you are on a high Protein low carb diet plus real strict with portion control which by the way is the truth i dont see why anyone needs to know . Thats what i plan on doing anyway my body my business.

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I am the opposite. I tell everyone and anyone that asks me how. I just got a tee shirt made up that says, I just lost 100 lbs interested? ask me how. I want to tell everyone, especially the obese people I see that can get healthy. I recently took a cruise with my husband for our 25th, there was a young man on the cruise, he had to weigh at least 450lbs or more and his wife was heavy but no where near that. I wanted to speak with them so much I was busting, he could not breathe and filled his plate with nothing but junk. I know you cannot force this surgery on anyone, but maybe in some way I could have helped and encouraged. That is what made me think of the tee shirt idea. I told my doc and he thought it was great. I just got it yesterday, so let's see if it even encourages 1 person, it will be worth the 30 bucks. For the people that have negative view, all I have to say, that's there problem not ours, and if you feel secure enough in your decision on surgery, then who cares what they think or say, that's there insecurities.

My hubby knows.

Otherwise, I didn't broadcast my WLS to other family or to friends.

If you want support you'll find a lot of it here.

I didn't tell a lot if people. I'm proud if my choice but I didn't want to hear any negative comments from anyone. I have a big family so I know eventually everyone will know. But just as long as I'm losing the weight I'm not going to let any negative comments stop me from reaching my goals.

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