Scale sabotage
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With the exception of one slip up during the two weeks of my 2 week pre-op diet, I adhered strictly.
When I showed up to the hospital on surgery day, the nurse shamed me and make me feel very uncomfortable. I told her that I followed and she said she needed to "speak to the surgeon about iit" And she said it in a way that made me feel like she did not believe me. I only lost 5 pounds in two weeks. I had even called the nutritionist on day 10 to tell her how very slowly I was losing. She was not concerned.
I was wheeled into the OR feeling like a complete and utter failure. I am now one week post op and petrified to weigh myself. I am the kind of person that takes the number very seriously… I know I should not, but unfortunately it is something that is buried very deep in me. I was thinking of only being weighed at the doctors office monthly because I am feeling that if I weigh myself and see any small gain--Even Water weight -- it will make me feel defeated and sabotage me.
How do you deal with weigh-ins at appointments vs. at home? Are there any non-weighers out there? My feeling is that I did this to be healthy and I can be healthy just knowing that I am adhering to the plan and not associating a number on a scale with good health. Any thoughts? Also, as you lose do you start feeling more confident that you are "doing this"? I still feel like a fraud somehow.
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