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Regret at times

Hi all,

My surgery date was 3.16.16 and it definitely a hard process that I underestimated. I never had thoughts of backing out before the surgery but know that I am just over 3 weeks out I feel regret at time. The way things feel right now, I will never be able to have a "normal" meal ever again. I think I am starting to get a but depressed. A lot to do with a single and live alone, I have been back home by myself for just over a week and its hard. Is anyone else having/had feelings or regret or depression post surgery and if so what did you do or doing?

Thanks

Sent from my SM-G925P using the BariatricPal App

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  • McButterpants
    McButterpants

    I think what you're feeling is perfectly normal. There have been times, even newly post-op, where I thought, "What did I do to myself?" Those feelings subsided after the first 6 months or so and at

  • KindaFamiliar
    KindaFamiliar

    I've not had such feelings but from what I gather, your feelings are far from abnormal... Unfortunately, I've no words or wisdom to impart on you apart from the following... No matter how you may f

  • berkeleyandbrownie
    berkeleyandbrownie

    I had some "buyer's remorse" for the first few weeks after surgery. Then, when I realized that I was actually losing weight, I got over that (mostly). I am now almost two years post-op and am 119 l

Featured Replies

I've not had such feelings but from what I gather, your feelings are far from abnormal...

Unfortunately, I've no words or wisdom to impart on you apart from the following...

No matter how you may feel, you are never, NEVER alone in this...

There is always support here...

Admittedly, it may not be the complete package (like when it comes to just needing a hug and other things I don't understand coz I'm a man and stuff), but it will almost certainly get you thru any tough times you may be having...

The chances are that somewhere in here will be people who are having/feeling/thinking exactly the same as you...

Hopefully such people will respond to you call for assistance and advice...

Take care @@Zoes.Realm

I look forward to reading your updates and successes in the future...

  • Author

I've not had such feelings but from what I gather, your feelings are far from abnormal...

Unfortunately, I've no words or wisdom to impart on you apart from the following...

No matter how you may feel, you are never, NEVER alone in this...

There is always support here...

Admittedly, it may not be the complete package (like when it comes to just needing a hug and other things I don't understand coz I'm a man and stuff), but it will almost certainly get you thru any tough times you may be having...

The chances are that somewhere in here will be people who are having/feeling/thinking exactly the same as you...

Hopefully such people will respond to you call for assistance and advice...

Take care @@Zoes.Realm

I look forward to reading your updates and successes in the future...

Thank you so my @KindaFamiliar. That alone are words of encouragement.

Sent from my SM-G925P using the BariatricPal App

I think what you're feeling is perfectly normal. There have been times, even newly post-op, where I thought, "What did I do to myself?" Those feelings subsided after the first 6 months or so and at 2.5 years out, I don't have them any more.

You can always get support here. Your local hospital may have a support group (even if you didn't get surgery there). You are not alone.

Here's what I know 2.5 years out - my life is so much better. I do not regret this decision at all - there were times when I was having an emotional moment that I wished I could sit down to a big bowl of Pasta and go to town. There were times I wanted to eat an entire baguette of bread. There were times I wanted chocolate cake. But my sleeve was there for me - it didn't allow me to sabotage myself.

My new normal is splitting a meal with my husband. Eating a hamburger without the bun. I still drink Protein shakes. But, I also allow some treats - a small bowl of ice cream, a cookie, a muffin, etc. But I don't crave them like I used to. I'm OK with my new normal.

Hang in there, kid. You're going to be on an emotional roller coaster for the foreseeable future. It's going to be hard. Keep your eye on the prize, though. It will be so worth it!

  • Author

I think what you're feeling is perfectly normal. There have been times, even newly post-op, where I thought, "What did I do to myself?" Those feelings subsided after the first 6 months or so and at 2.5 years out, I don't have them any more.

You can always get support here. Your local hospital may have a support group (even if you didn't get surgery there). You are not alone.

Here's what I know 2.5 years out - my life is so much better. I do not regret this decision at all - there were times when I was having an emotional moment that I wished I could sit down to a big bowl of Pasta and go to town. There were times I wanted to eat an entire baguette of bread. There were times I wanted chocolate cake. But my sleeve was there for me - it didn't allow me to sabotage myself.

My new normal is splitting a meal with my husband. Eating a hamburger without the bun. I still drink Protein shakes. But, I also allow some treats - a small bowl of ice cream, a cookie, a muffin, etc. But I don't crave them like I used to. I'm OK with my new normal.

Hang in there, kid. You're going to be on an emotional roller coaster for the foreseeable future. It's going to be hard. Keep your eye on the prize, though. It will be so worth it!

Thanks McButterpants. I definitely understand wanting something I can't have. But I am also terrified of those things that everyone says to avoid like sugar and such. It's always on my mind.

One more question, I've have a co work and a guy friend that have both had the surgery and they say that aren't usually hungry but I find myself kind of hungry. Not sure if it's all in my head, actually hungry or so focused on the plan to get enough food/fluids in. Do you find yourself hungry or do you have to try and remind yourself to eat?

Sent from my SM-G925P using the BariatricPal App

I think what you're feeling is perfectly normal. There have been times, even newly post-op, where I thought, "What did I do to myself?" Those feelings subsided after the first 6 months or so and at 2.5 years out, I don't have them any more.

You can always get support here. Your local hospital may have a support group (even if you didn't get surgery there). You are not alone.

Here's what I know 2.5 years out - my life is so much better. I do not regret this decision at all - there were times when I was having an emotional moment that I wished I could sit down to a big bowl of Pasta and go to town. There were times I wanted to eat an entire baguette of bread. There were times I wanted chocolate cake. But my sleeve was there for me - it didn't allow me to sabotage myself.

My new normal is splitting a meal with my husband. Eating a hamburger without the bun. I still drink Protein shakes. But, I also allow some treats - a small bowl of ice cream, a cookie, a muffin, etc. But I don't crave them like I used to. I'm OK with my new normal.

Hang in there, kid. You're going to be on an emotional roller coaster for the foreseeable future. It's going to be hard. Keep your eye on the prize, though. It will be so worth it!

Thanks McButterpants. I definitely understand wanting something I can't have. But I am also terrified of those things that everyone says to avoid like sugar and such. It's always on my mind.

One more question, I've have a co work and a guy friend that have both had the surgery and they say that aren't usually hungry but I find myself kind of hungry. Not sure if it's all in my head, actually hungry or so focused on the plan to get enough food/fluids in. Do you find yourself hungry or do you have to try and remind yourself to eat?

Sent from my SM-G925P using the BariatricPal App

I had head hunger at first - I wanted to chew food. Once that subsided, my hunger did go away. Probably at about 18 months, I noticed my hunger has come back, although it's not to the extent it was prior to surgery. While I feel hunger, I don't have the draw to food that I had pre-op. It's just not that important to me any more.

  • Author

I think what you're feeling is perfectly normal. There have been times, even newly post-op, where I thought, "What did I do to myself?" Those feelings subsided after the first 6 months or so and at 2.5 years out, I don't have them any more.

You can always get support here. Your local hospital may have a support group (even if you didn't get surgery there). You are not alone.

Here's what I know 2.5 years out - my life is so much better. I do not regret this decision at all - there were times when I was having an emotional moment that I wished I could sit down to a big bowl of Pasta and go to town. There were times I wanted to eat an entire baguette of bread. There were times I wanted chocolate cake. But my sleeve was there for me - it didn't allow me to sabotage myself.

My new normal is splitting a meal with my husband. Eating a hamburger without the bun. I still drink Protein shakes. But, I also allow some treats - a small bowl of ice cream, a cookie, a muffin, etc. But I don't crave them like I used to. I'm OK with my new normal.

Hang in there, kid. You're going to be on an emotional roller coaster for the foreseeable future. It's going to be hard. Keep your eye on the prize, though. It will be so worth it!

Thanks McButterpants. I definitely understand wanting something I can't have. But I am also terrified of those things that everyone says to avoid like sugar and such. It's always on my mind.

One more question, I've have a co work and a guy friend that have both had the surgery and they say that aren't usually hungry but I find myself kind of hungry. Not sure if it's all in my head, actually hungry or so focused on the plan to get enough food/fluids in. Do you find yourself hungry or do you have to try and remind yourself to eat?

Sent from my SM-G925P using the BariatricPal App

I had head hunger at first - I wanted to chew food. Once that subsided, my hunger did go away. Probably at about 18 months, I noticed my hunger has come back, although it's not to the extent it was prior to surgery. While I feel hunger, I don't have the draw to food that I had pre-op. It's just not that important to me any more.

So I now have an idea of what's happening. This is a very wild and rocky process. Never excepted this. Like I said, I underestimated all of this.

Thanks

Sent from my SM-G925P using the BariatricPal App

It Will pass! After surgery our hormones go crazy I felt the same way and cried like a baby and now I remember and laugh at my self.

You will do just fine. Hormones are not your friends right now. I had exactly the same thoughts you are having right after surgery. I'm going to lose all my friends because I can't go out to eat, or parties, or happy hour, etc, etc.... Well 6 months out and none of that is true. I haven't found any food that actually makes me sick. I can still go out to eat with friends, I just make much more healthier choices for my meals. No one has abandoned me because I don't drink with them all night. I'm single and am just as active if not more than before the surgery. I now get to wear much nicer clothes and feel much more confident.

Hang in there. The next 6 months will go very fast and you will be in a great place. Occasionally I will have a sweet or two and nothing terrible happens. I do really have to watch what I eat, but it is much easier after the WLS.

Sorry hon, really I am sooooo thankful for my husbands care and support. He's helped me bathe and walk and every time I needed to get up to go the bathroom there he was and still is. You should definitely join a support group and pray a lot. Take care. It will get better soon.

I am 8 days post op and I have the same feelings, I was crying last night telling my husband why did I do it?why didn't he stop me?. I knew at the time of doing this I did it for the right reasons but know I can't seem to remember, all I can think about is the foods I can't have again or I think I can never have and the feeling of joy food brought me. When ever I say that out loud I realize how much of a food addiction I have and how the mental game is going to be harder then I ever thought.

To the point where today I tried to eat a McDonald's burger told myself if I chew for a while it will be okay, until my sleeve said umm I don't think so. How sad is that? So you are not lone far from it! hopefully the day will come where we can both say it was all Worth it.

Good luck to you.

  • Author

Thank you choicemun, this all have been a very big mental game and a lot of the time I feel like I am losing at it. I think that some day we both will get there. I also completely get, just learning that you are a food addict. I never thought that was me, that I just liked what I liked and was that. Now I find myself wanting to do anything for a cheeseburger lol

Thanks and take care

Sent from my SM-G925P using the BariatricPal App

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