I had a band for 5 years which was moderately successful initially, after2 slips and surgeries to correct I had it removed. By this time I had regained most of the weight.

My Surgeon recommended I have Bypass 3 months later after all settled. I am not a candidate for a sleeve.

I'm not afraid of the diet ect but the aftershock, Byers remorse in the first few months, hair loss and like all of us.... Complications.

Weighing this up I have high cholesterol, debilitating GERD, chronic back pain which previously rectified itself with weight loss. A family history of diabetes, heart disease and all of my siblings are Obese with their own health issues. My GP says I need to rectify my fatty liver as I already have a compromised LFT from heamacromotosis and medications. Psychologically my self esteem is in my boots as I hate the way I look and my constant back pain keeps me cranky and disparing as I can't exercise and struggle with daily activities let alone the life enhancing ones that I have had to give up like gardening and bushwalking. My Psych is supportive of my having surgery as is my GP

I sooo want this but I am scared......I am also soo afraid of the life I have ahead of me if I don't have it. I don't know how much longer I can go on like this with the pain and general unhappiness.

I spent new year in hospital with a suspected heart attack. All checked out our after an angiogram but it was yet another reminder of my risk factors...

Please feel free to hit me with some realities and advice.

Edited February 9, 201610 yr by justright66

It would seem you're quite aware of your realities and the eventualities if you forgo surgery. No one can make you do it but yourself. From what you illustrated you have all the pieces in place to do this, but are stuck on the negatives.

What finally pushed me to have gastric bypass was seeing my little girl grow up. I came to the realization that it was selfish of me to put off surgery that will likely prolong my life. Why should't a daughter have her father around for as long as possible?

There are risks with any venture you take in life. It comes down to overcoming the fear of the "what if," and seeing the "what could be."

Only you can decide but I have to ask, if someone offered you a life of high cholesterol, debilitating GERD, chronic back pain, diabetes, heart disease, fatty liver, a compromised LFT from heamacromotosis and medications, low self esteem and hating the way you look, and constant back pain which will keep you cranky and disparing, struggle with daily activities let alone giving up wonderful things like gardening and bushwalking -- are you saying you would choose this option? Because that's what I hear as one of your choices and possibly the one you are considering choosing.

Take a sheet of paper and on one side, list the pros and cons of having the surgery and what your life might look like and on the other side, the pros and cons of not having the surgery and what your life might look like.

Take a step back and look at the list and be honest about which life you really want. (don't think about the fear, be pragmatic and think about the real pros and cons of each and what they really mean.

Best of luck in your decision.

Wise advice and much appreciated thanks :-)

Seems like a no brainer. DO IT.

not everyone loses hair (I didn't). And it sounds like for the vast majority, they lose enough that *they* notice, but no one else does. That's not to say that there aren't people who lose clumps and clumps of hair - there are. But from what I've read on here and other sites, that sounds like the minority.

there are complication risks with any surgery. Most are minor. A lot of people don't have any at all. From what you described, it sounds like it's a lot more risky *not* to have the surgery.

ImageUploadedByBariatricPal1451773497.998295.jpgImageUploadedByBariatricPal1451773524.716178.jpg

I had a band for 5 years which was moderately successful initially, after2 slips and surgeries to correct I had it removed. By this time I had regained most of the weight.

My Surgeon recommended I have Bypass 3 months later after all settled. I am not a candidate for a sleeve.

I'm not afraid of the diet ect but the aftershock, Byers remorse in the first few months, hair loss and like all of us.... Complications.

Weighing this up I have high cholesterol, debilitating GERD, chronic back pain which previously rectified itself with weight loss. A family history of diabetes, heart disease and all of my siblings are Obese with their own health issues. My GP says I need to rectify my fatty liver as I already have a compromised LFT from heamacromotosis and medications. Psychologically my self esteem is in my boots as I hate the way I look and my constant back pain keeps me cranky and disparing as I can't exercise and struggle with daily activities let alone the life enhancing ones that I have had to give up like gardening and bushwalking. My Psych is supportive of my having surgery as is my GP

I sooo want this but I am scared......I am also soo afraid of the life I have ahead of me if I don't have it. I don't know how much longer I can go on like this with the pain and general unhappiness.

I spent new year in hospital with a suspected heart attack. All checked out our after an angiogram but it was yet another reminder of my risk factors...

Please feel free to hit me with some realities and advice.

Your story is my story ...had my revision surgery December 28.I was in lapband misery since 2004....total failure...revision to bypass and getting that crap out of me is the biggest and best thing I have done for myself in years.The years of torture ,sliming,vomiting,slippage,weight gain....was back fat as ever...Gerd....High chloresterol,PCOS,fatty liver,fear of reoccurrence of breast cancer,joint and muscle pain....flipped ,eroding painful port area...just so many problems....I HAD TO DO IT!Get it done!!!!Take back your body and your health.....do it fast!

I had high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, severe acid reflux (GERD), sleep apnea and other medical conditions. All of these went into remission within 2 weeks after surgery and have stayed in remission. I am 32 months post-op. So all I can say is having RNY gastric bypass surgery was the best decision I ever made.

If I was in your shoes I would do it.

I was pushing 400 pounds a little over a year ago and didn't have high blood pressure, diabetes, none of that. It was like I meant to carry excess weight. I got tired of sideways glances from strangers at me and not fitting into chairs, things like that. I also have two kids and a super husband. I knew that if I continued with the yo yo dieting, and the extreme excess weight the luck with my health would run out. I'm not afraid to die, but the thought of leaving my kiddos on this earth without me scares the daylights out of me-more than the surgery did. It was found that I had an umbilical hernia (imagine being so fat that you didn't know you had a hernia!-sheesh!), that needed to be fixed and I also developed an internal hernia-so two more surgeries this year. I have also lost more than my fair share of hair but its growing back I'm happy to say. Even though I had those things go wrong and I was scared initially, I'd still do it again in a heartbeat.

Do it not only for yourself, but your loved ones.

I was banded in '04. Removed '14 due to complications. Bypass January '15. One year post op coming up. Best decision I've ever made. Wish I would've done bypass the first time. Second time around was MUCH easier for me. Truly. Honestly. Worth it. And I had to self pay for bypass which was a huge struggle.

Thank you to all who answered my plea for help, especially eskaay77. You laid it out simple and plain. Much appreciated.

I wish you the best!! Just note that you will feel some buyer's remorse for about the first week or 2 after surgery. You will wonder what the heck you just did to yourself. This is normal and gets quickly replaced with "why didn't I do this sooner!"