I'm 27 6ft 345lbs and getting the procedure done march 25 and still haven't told ANYONE about it. i feel like I'm cheating my way into losing weight. i honestly don't plan on telling anyone and just say I'm on a "Diet"

Like plenty of people on here, i don't plan on spending my 30's like my 20's.

Congratulations for taking positive action!

I couldn't keep it a secret... too excited!

Edited February 22, 201511 yr by BeagleLover

Told 3 people -- my husband and 2 friends who live 1,000 and 2,000 miles away.

Do it your way.

I only told 2 ppl (my BFF's) and my hubs. I wasnt about to hear everyones neg comments an trying to talk me out of doing this. I still havnt openly talked about it. I didnt even tell my parents. an they still dont know I am 7 months post an 100 plus pds down! its hard enuff emotionally an mentally relearning a new way of life an I did this for me I didnt need others approval. I might say something eventually but its still kept quiet around here!

@@FatboyNYC You stated: "Cheating my way into losing weight"?

Only my husband and my kids know of my surgery. But not because I felt I was cheating by having WLS. I'm just a private person and don't feel everyone has a need to know my business.

Is it cheating to get help to quit smoking? Is it cheating when my son gives himself a shot prior to eating because he's a type 1 diabetic. Is it cheating when my parents take their blood pressure meds? Was it cheating when I chose to have my thyroid removed instead of taking my chances by living with cancer? Obesity is a multifaceted disease, one that the medical community and insurance companies agree is a DISEASE.

<Sigh> sorry for the rant. But until we change our own mindsets regarding obesity and WLS...how can we expect anyone else to?

I forgot to mention... YOUR NOT CHEATING!! it takes bravery an courage to ask for help when God knows I had been on every diet know on the planet! for me hashis , insulin resistance, an 10 other dx it was NOT happening on its own. I was already eating only 400 to 500 cal a day an still the weight wouldnt go any wheres but up! we had to remove stomach hormones to get my body to start working an I was put on armour thyroid an taking my tummy from 40 oz to 4 oz was what I needed. plz dont feel like your cheating its the hardest route an toughest thing to ever do to get your life back! nothing easy about it. first month the hardest emotionally, mentally (fighting an resisting against head hunger) an yes I shed a few tears here an there..first month..after 4 wks it was all good. our brains are addicted to the feel good carbs an they will go in withdrawls! its like stopping smoking. thought I needed to share...keep us posted!

Hello! I haven't posted in a while and just thought I would check back in. There are tons of threads on this topic. I am almost a year post op. I kept my decision to have surgery very private and still do. I did realize that there was just no way not to keep it completely quiet (although some do). My inner circle of friends and family knew from the beginning. I told a few when it seemed like it was appropriate or when the moment seems right. I had major fears of being judged in the begining. I put it out there to anyone who did know that I wasn't really asking permission or their opinion. If someone was the super-anxious type I waited to tell or didn't tell because THEIR anxiety would make mine worse. I didn't tell my mom until the week before. I didn't tell my dad until I was 3 months post. My sister was my biggest cheerleader and knew when it was just a "thought" rambling in my head. Most of my best girlfriends knew. I didn't want everyone's opinion though and in telling people I was planning to do this - I let that be known up front. To my surprize, very few were outright negative. I've lost 122 pounds total (100 since surgery) and it's been pretty rapid so I am sure many have figured it out. It gets annoying when the only thing people want to talk about is my weight loss. And that was one of my reasons why I didn't want to tell everyone. I didn't want WLS to be the first thing they thought of when they saw me or heard my name. It's just ONE part of me - not the only thing about me. Looking back, I worried about it more than I should have. At the beginning and end of this journey - this is about YOU! Hold your head up high and make yourself a list of all the things you want to do when you lose weight. Focus on THAT list everytime the anxiety gets to you. It is the greatest feeling to LIVE life again. If you do all your homework and this is truly for you, you will not regret anything and the people in your life who love you will go along for the ride. BEST OF LUCK TO YOU!!!

Edited February 22, 201511 yr by CrazyJaney

thank you all for your responses. i admire all of you and can't wait to get this done already. i honestly think I'm going to keep this to myself. like janey said i just wouldn't be able to handle every time my name is mentioned or if i see someone their first thought being about the surgery. kudos to you.

I really wish I hadn't told anyone! Too late now though. Surgery in 11 days & I've told my mom, sister, & 1 coworker (MISTAKE!)

I kept my procedure a secret for the most part. My fiancé, my aunt and uncle, and my fiancé's mom and step dad know. Other than that it is a complete secret from everyone else. I wanted to make sure that this was a decision that I was happy with and that was my own. I'm about 4 months out, the hardest part was keeping it a secret in the beginning when I was on liquids, but now people are so used to me eating smaller portions that no one even questions it anymore.

thank you all for your responses. i admire all of you and can't wait to get this done already. i honestly think I'm going to keep this to myself. like janey said i just wouldn't be able to handle every time my name is mentioned or if i see someone their first thought being about the surgery. kudos to you.

What part of NY? I'm in westchester and no I haven't told anyone but my husband, mom, sister and BFF he's a guy lolZ I don't want anyone feeling like they have a right to tell me I'm cheating, or taking the ways way out, or convince me of how dangerous it can be. I want to be stress free going into this. Good luck!

I haven't had surgery yet but I have only told my parents thus far. I might eventually tell my sister but I don't find it necessary to tell her now. The only other person I may tell is my manager regarding time off, although if I don't say exactly what it is I know she wouldn't push it, but I know I can trust her to not tell anyone else. I'm most worried about my mom telling other family members after people start noticing after surgery. I pretty confident that most of my family wouldn't judge me and they would be happy I was getting healthy, but I prefer to keep some things to myself.

thank you all for your responses. i admire all of you and can't wait to get this done already. i honestly think I'm going to keep this to myself. like janey said i just wouldn't be able to handle every time my name is mentioned or if i see someone their first thought being about the surgery. kudos to you.

What part of NY? I'm in westchester and no I haven't told anyone but my husband, mom, sister and BFF he's a guy lolZ I don't want anyone feeling like they have a right to tell me I'm cheating, or taking the ways way out, or convince me of how dangerous it can be. I want to be stress free going into this. Good luck!

im in brooklyn, I've only told my brother and honestly not planning to tell anyone. they'll eventually might see the minor scars but i'll cross that bridge when i get there.

The older i get the more private i become i think maybe its bc I'm not out for others approval, acceptance nor opinions. If i want someones input I'll ask. Its like i was talking to therapist about it ..before this was done its hard enuff emotionally and mentally i didn't want or need to hear others neg input..i don't no if i mentioned this on this tgread or not just thought about it. But to each their own..????

The older i get the more private i become i think maybe its bc I'm not out for others approval, acceptance nor opinions. If i want someones input I'll ask. Its like i was talking to therapist about it ..before this was done its hard enuff emotionally and mentally i didn't want or need to hear others neg input..i don't no if i mentioned this on this tgread or not just thought about it. But to each their own..????

I wholeheartedly agree.

This is my philosophy. Let the people who care about you most know. Specifically, where it's reciprocal. For me, this is my godparents (one got the procedure, the other is getting it in June), my best friend/sexual partner, and soon my parents. Just a small group. They will help support me during the surgical procedure.

Then, I'm going to let the action speak for itself. People will ask questions, and I will tell them.

I won't lie. But, I'm not going to shout it out either.