1-week Surgiversary plus a little rant
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lol, God gave me a malignant tumor in my right arm and no one told me they were sad for my missing malignant tumor when I had it cut out. I'm an atheist but I'd like to think that if I were religious,
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I'm Agnostic but raised Catholic. I learned that "God helps those who help themselves" and that's what you did. Good for you! It will get better.
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I'm not agnostic nor atheist and I still think that was an insensative thing to think , let alone say!! You did the right thing for you!! Tell them to get stuffed!!
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I'm down a total of 36 lbs, which is fantastic. I started this journey at 310, and I'm now at my lowest point in about 10 years (I think I was around 270 after I gave birth to my youngest. I could be wrong though...it was a while ago) I am slightly irritated that I'm still so swollen that my clothes are not reflecting the loss, and I am frustrated that I can't do much walking because my stomach HURTS (I hit 3300 steps yesterday, which was an accomplishment. Pre-surgery, I was doing 10k steps). I know that I need to give my body time to heal, but I am ready to start MOVING!
Last night was a bad night. I was told that "This time last week you still had your whole stomach. I am sad for your missing stomach" and "God gave you a stomach because he wants you to eat." To say I saw red would be an understatement. After the pain I've gone through in the past week, to say things like that just irritate the everloving fuck out of me. And I'm agnostic bordering toward atheism, so saying God did anything is guaranteed to get me to turn a mute ear. By that same token, God gave me a gall bladder for whatever reason (it's been gone 9 years), a thyroid gland (partially gone for 6 years) and reproductive organs (non-functional for 10 years due to surgical intervention).
Just because some Big Invisible Friend allegedly gave me something doesn't mean that it works. And when you have something that isn't working as intended, you fix it. My stomach wasn't working as intended, for whatever reason. I had no shut-off, and whether that was physical (I couldn't read hunger cues) or mental (because food=comfort). So I fixed it...with the aid of a surgeon. He and I decided together which surgery would be best for the amount I have to lose, for my general health and for a lot of other little reasons that go into making this kind of momentous decision (I didn't just close my eyes and point to a chart for which surgery I wanted. I thoroughly discussed the options and chose the one that was best suited for my situation)
So in closing, don't bother with the pity for my missing stomach. If you want to feel anything for me, feel happy that I took control of my life for a change. Feel happy that I can walk up and down the stairs as intended, without heaving for air at the top or limping up them one step at a time (that is my NSV for today...walking up and down the stairs without pausing and without painfully pulling myself up one step at a time) Be glad that I took this step before my health deteriorated to the point where I would need my hips and knees replaced (my knees...oh my knees...they feel completely different with just this small amount lost. I am SO looking forward to walking longer distances and eventually starting the C25K.)