This site has been a great inspiration and resource for me. Most members have been a fantastic inspiration to me.

I feel as a nurse I also have some useful information to share even though I am freshly post op. I like to post encouraging words and add to something if I feel it is useful.

What I don't find useful are comments that criticize a post or comment. If you do not like something a member posts... keep it moving. No one needs comments that are negative. I was told today that I 'need more coaching'.... and I am setting myself up for disaster, disappointment, self-sabotage whatever merely b/c I was inquiring members to post their progress (regarding lbs lost) in the first few months post op.

I completely understand everyone progresses differently. I was merely inquiring. I'm a little excited, pardon me.

So for those who feel compelled to leave a sermon on how this is a recipe for disaster please move on without imposing your two cents, it is not wanted or warranted.

Thanks.

P.S. That includes this post.

I read your other post and know what you mean. Never occurred to me that you were looking for results to compare your own to. One of the reasons I don't post much. I've read and been on the receiving end of self-righteous know-it-alls. There's wanting to help and there's "I Know Best So Let Me Set You Straight" attitudes. Sometimes were curious about things that requires specifies but know that were only going to get general info. That can be enough to get a ideal of whatever you want to know.

I hear ya! I take it all with a grain of salt (around a margarita glass..>LOL...if only)... sometimes I think because we can't actually "hear" the person, the tone comes across wrong... I know I would never, intentionally post anything like that...but it may happen...and if so, I apologize in advance ...

I read your other post and know what you mean. Never occurred to me that you were looking for results to compare your own to. One of the reasons I don't post much. I've read and been on the receiving end of self-righteous know-it-alls. There's wanting to help and there's "I Know Best So Let Me Set You Straight" attitudes. Sometimes were curious about things that requires specifies but know that were only going to get general info. That can be enough to get a ideal of whatever you want to know.

thanks for that I was pretty fired up.

I hear ya! I take it all with a grain of salt (around a margarita glass..>LOL...if only)... sometimes I think because we can't actually "hear" the person, the tone comes across wrong... I know I would never, intentionally post anything like that...but it may happen...and if so, I apologize in advance ...

Oh what I would give to have a margarita!!! LOL

lol you better get used to it..

Most of it comes from a good place.. But there are those, on the odd occasion, who lack, what do we call it?.... The ability to tailor their communication to the audience and ability to convey their message with tact and diplomacy...

You can't censor people from having an opinion.. Because that's what makes life interesting! Plus and this is the best part about it, it can give a different perspective on things that you might not have considered..

However, this also comes with the caveat that some people just go for the contrarian view, just to get a rise out of people..

My rule of thumb - if they're directly attacking you, its one thing. I don't take kindly to that myself (it's also against the rules) If they're trying to be 'helpful', give them a chance. If it's loaded with 'holier than thou', you, too, have the choice to ignore or respond.

Either way, it'll always happen! Ain't internet life grand?!

Well, in my opinion....

So for those who feel compelled to leave a sermon on how this is a recipe for disaster please move on without imposing your two cents, it is not wanted or warranted.

Thanks.

P.S. That includes this post.

...dagnabit!

I'm sipping a margarita while reading these threads. Pure entertainment.

Wait did someone say something about alcohol? I'm in!

Edited February 13, 201412 yr by indecision

Wait did someone say something about alcohol? I'm in!

LOL...that is one of my favorite sayings...I barely had alcohol before surgery, so I'm NOT having any now...but the saying stands....

hmmm kettle?

Oh I will get used to it... and they will get used to me too.

lol you better get used to it..

Most of it comes from a good place.. But there are those, on the odd occasion, who lack, what do we call it?.... The ability to tailor their communication to the audience and ability to convey their message with tact and diplomacy...

You can't censor people from having an opinion.. Because that's what makes life interesting! Plus and this is the best part about it, it can give a different perspective on things that you might not have considered..

However, this also comes with the caveat that some people just go for the contrarian view, just to get a rise out of people..

My rule of thumb - if they're directly attacking you, its one thing. I don't take kindly to that myself (it's also against the rules) If they're trying to be 'helpful', give them a chance. If it's loaded with 'holier than thou', you, too, have the choice to ignore or respond.

Either way, it'll always happen! Ain't internet life grand?!

You have every reason to be excited..This is your time to have this happen. This is your beginning of a journey that will help you to be a healthier happier you......

Inquire away.......

I remember when I first started I had the world in my hands....I felt like it was the hugest most exciting event in my life.....And it was.....I don't see it like that anymore. Now it is work and learning and changing and, and, and..I loved the beginning..So you have the right to love it too.......

You have every reason to be excited..This is your time to have this happen. This is your beginning of a journey that will help you to be a healthier happier you......

Inquire away.......

I remember when I first started I had the world in my hands....I felt like it was the hugest most exciting event in my life.....And it was.....I don't see it like that anymore. Now it is work and learning and changing and, and, and..I loved the beginning..So you have the right to love it too.......

Thank you very much for that.

When I first got sleeved there was so much hostility around here I stopped coming I only started coming back recently.
People were giving lectures on everything from eating habits drinking working out getting personal it wasn’t very nice.
I spoke up a couple of times backing people who were being jumped all over because i was sitting here getting so mad at things I was reading I had popping veins I swear lol
I never ever try to be a know it all because frankly I am far far from it to be the oracle on this subject at all.
when I do post I personally tell my experience and things I suggest or can think of without it being do as I did (well I hope I come across that way anyway!!)

Now this next thing I am going to say may actually get me a crap storm for saying it but oh well lol
I think some people replace the old bad food habits and addiction with a new healthy one and the new one is how to be as healthy as can be, which by its self is totally fine but pressing it on others because they researched 1,000 hours of food nutrition and what works for them isn’t for everyone.

We all have to find our- I will repeat OUR way to do this how WE change our habits lifestyle and what works for us, I love reading everyones stats what they do how they eat that I am not alone in this like a alien but I really don’t want anyone telling me I am bad/wrong/gonna fail/have crappy doctors/nuts/don’t eat right/don’t work out enough etc etc etc because I don’t do exactly what they are doing it.
I know what I signed up for when I started this we all do, sharing and some advice is helpful when asked for but that do as I do thing really isn’t.

I looked up some of my earlier posts...You know before I had the surgery and did all the research and was never going to make a mistake kind of posts...i cringe when I read them....oops..

Now that I am 15 months out and am living in this new body and in the real world..I see things a bit different. Does not mean that i expect people to do things my way..Although it would be nice...tongue in cheek here okay!!!!!! LOL

Anyway the more you work at this the more you see how much work you have to do to change the person within...That is a boatload of work to do..And as much as I work on it I have days when I really fall flat on my face.

I have learned some valuable information from this forum. There have been times when I have said the wrong thing ...can't imagine it but it is possible..tongue in cheek again..lol

The point is when we start this and even in the beginning we are so excited and zealous that we over compensate by trying to say all the right things because we are trying to tell you the things we have learned and experienced ourselves...Right, we just want to help each other. Example sure!!!!! Great, nice, wonderful, true..

No! No one is perfect and will do this perfectly..But there is a lot of good stuff on here and people are just trying to encourage at times...Others no, but they are the ones that assume that we don't know that somewhere they have struggled or will.....

Me I think it is a journey, train wreck, trip, up and down, two steps backwards, one forward and everything in between.

Don't give up..Keep going day after day....Changing what is inside will change outside and maybe just maybe you can help someone else....That is a privilege to do that..I think that anyway!!!!!!!

Just like you can take offence at what I say the same can happen to you...Some...most try to help. Whether they have the skill to come off gentle and soothing or like a run away train...We are in it to win it...Take it with a ton of salt...No one really wants to hurt anyone...I know I don't....

The day I stop helping someone, anyone on here. It will be time to leave.......

Edited February 14, 201412 yr by RJ'S/beginning