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Keeping it a secret?

I wonder how many of us have kept this a secret from others and how that works. I am struggling between not telling anyone but my mom and husband, and telling everyone in hopes of perhaps helping someone who needs help or inspiration.

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How many people have you shared your lap-band experience with? 3 members have voted

  1. 1. How many people have you shared your lap-band experience with?

    • No one or Only my significant other
      16%
      197
    • Limited number of people, closest friend/family members
      55%
      671
    • Most of my Family & Friends know
      14%
      173
    • Everyone & Their neighbor's Dog know
      13%
      165

Please sign in or register to vote in this poll.

Featured Replies

I told whoever asked or whatever. I just didn't want it to be all taboo or feel like I was doing something wrong. I made sure everyone knew how hard I was working and how its not the "easy way".

Now I have a huge support base and everyone is helping me!

I tell everyone if it comes up for any reason. I see no reason not to and it does not come up frequently just because people know. The only people who ask how it's going are my immediate family members and my closest friends from time to time. I'm not ashamed of it and have no reason to keep it secret that I can think of. I have even told people who are practically strangers!!

I've only told my best friend at work, brothers, one of whom lives with me, my mom, who is coming from California to help me... and I think that is it. So the only people who know is anyone they told. And my medical providers. And I never go to California (due to my weight and planes. I mean I can go, I just do not want to be so uncomfortable in a tight seat) so I do not care what anyone says out there. my friend at work is tight with me so he won't say anything to anyone.

By the time I get to California again though, everyone will wonder where the weight went, but we will have so much fun no one will bother with it much!

I told my Sister too, OF COURSE! :thumbup:

The only person I told was my sister. She know exactly what procedure I had done. I was not planning to tell anyone, but the hospital insisted that I provide an emergency contact person, so that got me to thinking...what if something happens? What if I don't wake up from the surgery.

So I did the grown up thing and told my sister where to find my life insurance policies and how best to help my adult kids get through the worse should the worse happen.

My brother was the one who actually dropped me off at the hospital and picked me up from the hospital, but he does not know what type of procedure I had done. :confused:

I don't volunteer the information but if someone asks how I lost so much weight I tell them. Usually I get a "wow that's great" or "oh I know someone who is considering having the lapband, how was the recovery..."

So far two friends and hubby. I can't bring myself to tell anyone else. I'm just a really private person.

I told everyone. I think of this surgery as a blessing. When I was having surgery they found something else. This probably would not have been found if I was not being banded. I had another surgery and now I am on the mend and feeling great. I now have a friend that is thinking about getting banded.

  • 1 month later...

Oh Boy do i regret telling people i got the band. Every friend and family member i have told has told EVERYONE they know. so now anytime i see anyone that knows me or of me give me a once over. I hate the pressure i feel to be losing large amounts of weight. people call me and the first thing they say is HOW MUCH HAVE U LOST; ARE YOU SKINNY YET....uggghhhh I am the posterchild for lapbanding now.

Now that it has been some time since my surgery... I told everyone and their brother what I did....I now just say, when asked if I have lost weight.... Yes I did and it is a daily struggle to continue...... that is all they need to know at this point. To some closer friends I say medical intervention is a great thing!!! and they just laugh as I do too.

Oh Boy do i regret telling people i got the band. Every friend and family member i have told has told EVERYONE they know. so now anytime i see anyone that knows me or of me give me a once over. I hate the pressure i feel to be losing large amounts of weight. people call me and the first thing they say is HOW MUCH HAVE U LOST; ARE YOU SKINNY YET....uggghhhh I am the posterchild for lapbanding now.

And so the name............"I walk the line"!! Very appropriate. I told lots of people too. I just say "Yes, I'm losing, slowly, but surely like I'm supposed to be doing. I still have to work at it. It doesn't just fall off." Best wishes!! Don't feel pressured. You will do great anyway and everyone will be saying "wow" in a short time!

  • 1 month later...

I've only told my family and a few close friends. I've decided NOT to tell my colleagues at work..... I just feel that it's a personal decision and not really a "water cooler" topic - if you know what I mean.

Let them all notice in a few months that I'm losing weight and wonder..... ha ha

:thumbup:

i really regret telling all the people that i told.

if i could do it over the only person that would know is my husband and best friend of 30 years. that's it.

Those who aren't telling, what do you do after surgery when you go back to work? I eat lunch with my coworkers every day (one of the reasons I've gotten so much fatter in the last year, because it's hard to say no to them!). How do you cope when you're on liquids/mushy food etc if you're not telling people? Can't really say you're on a liquid diet...?

It is not so bad. Just tell them you are on a special diet to kickstart weight loss. Considering that I was obese at the time, no one thought it was unusual that I would be on a special diet.

I would also still go out with friends after but very occasionally and order soup or something very light. Once I was on solids, a salad is good in that you can pick off the protein and scoot it around your plate quite a bit.

All in all, there was only a single occasion in all that time where someone said something. A friend said, "Heather, you have been eating that salad for almost an hour and it doesn't look any smaller" . . . I just said I was feeling a little under the weather and that was sufficient.

It is not so bad. Just tell them you are on a special diet to kickstart weight loss. Considering that I was obese at the time, no one thought it was unusual that I would be on a special diet.

I agree with you Heather -- if anyone does notice ... and I know there are a couple who are bold enough to point it out, that is exactly what I intend to tell them ... I am always on some diet, so I doubt anyone will think anything about it ... and none of them are willing to go to any extremes to lose weight, so they would never do a liquid diet ... they just want to talk about losing weight; however, are not willing to do anything different to accomplish any weight loss. Down the road, if they ask and are seriously interested, then I may tell them the entire story. Until then, mums the word.

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