I wonder how many of us have kept this a secret from others and how that works. I am struggling between not telling anyone but my mom and husband, and telling everyone in hopes of perhaps helping someone who needs help or inspiration.

Hi everyone - nearly 1 year in and I still haven't told anyone at all. I don't really think about it in respect of whether I should tell people or not anymore.

I haven't found it particularly hard as I now live on my own and when I go out to eat with friends I just pick more mushy foods like mash pototo or soups and although I eat very slowly so no one thinks twice about what I'm eating.

When I get a fill I make sure I avoid going out to eat (it's not a problem drinking) until I adjust to the new eating regime.

I'm glad I didn't tell anyone because it has taken me 6 months to get used to having the band and making it work for me and it has been nice not having the extra worry about what will people think. Now I seem to be on track to losing weight so I'm pretty happy.

I don't think it's cheating not to tell people because it is still a battle to lose weight - I still have to work out and make the right choices in food but the band does help me tremendously!

Getting it has been the best decision I've made in a long time.

Good luck to those that are battling their way to goal.

I agree, it's not that hard to hide it from people. I was banded in May, and the people I work with still don't know. Everyone is always on some kind of diet anyway, so no one really notices how I eat now.

My DH has told someone at my work and I'm devastated. He thinks I'm over-reacting and says he only told this person because he's proud of me. But for me, it was important to keep it a secret. I now feel under a lot of pressure to lose the weight quickly instead of steadily as I have over the first year, so I am hardly eating at all some days. I feel embarrassed when I go to work because I know she will have told others, so most people will know now.

I wanted to wait until I reach goal and then tell the world but now that's been ruined. He doesn't understand and we have had a huge row about it.

I'm finding it hard to forgive him.

I don't blame you for being mad. I would be too.

I managed to keep it a secret for 15 months. Two very close friends were the only ones who knew, the girl who drove me home from the clinic and my best friend since childhood. Two and a half weeks ago my band slipped and I had to have emergency surgery. Now everyone knows including my mother, brother, children, friends and acquaintences. C'est le vie.

im sorry that that happenned, sometimes people are really happy for you, but he should have kept his mouth shut, that was very disrespectful....just go on, as usual, people generally dont even know what the heck a lap band is.....let alone how it works.....if anyone ever, ever! questions your weight loss, or your progress, and is asking how much you have lost, or how long it is going to take.....Tell them you have a lap band and it varies between each individual that has one, and that you are working just to be healthy.....people are so snoopy, jealous, and plain stupid.....just do you own thing, pretty soon they forget you even have one, and go about finding something else to stick their noses into!

good luck.....i have been there!!!

My hubby doesn't even know! :laugh:I told him I went to Ensenada for a spa weekend and when he asked me why I was hobbling around a little, I told him I got slammed against some rocks during a scuba dive.

My mom knows and I'm sure she told everyone on her side of the family like my sister and grandma but they know not to say anything.

I might tell him about 40 or so lbs. from now. Jackass, that's what he gets for calling me fat whenever we get in to heated name calling arguments.

For the record, I've told everyone....friends, family, co-workers...and they have been nothing but supportive. It can work out to be a positive thing, I have a GREAT support system.....and that really helps me in times I am struggling a little....just a gentle "but look how far you've come, don't get discouraged" means everything to me!

Everyone has to choose their own path, but this one is sure working for me!

I have only told my husband and my best friend. I am afraid to tell my mom and sister. They have been against every diet that I have ever tried. My mother thinks I look "healthy". Whatever is what I have to say to that. When you read something that says that you are morbidly obese, I do not think that qualifies as healthy.

I told everyone. But not until afterward. The time building up to it I didn't want to hear all the crap from everyone. And after it was done everyone (minus one witch at work) has been awesome about it. A few people have even asked about it for themselves. And as for the witch at work...she is one that I simply don't talk to her about it. So for me like the others it has been really positive.

I told everyone and they can kiss my skinny a** if they don't like it! Everyone has their own opinion but they can't judge me because they never walked in my shoes growing up fat.

You should think about it his way, although you asked him not to say anything, maybe he was just sooo proud of you that it just came out. You should learn to forgive him and get over the feeling that he betrayed you. You are the one changing your body and everyone will be soooo excited to see you act and feel better and your husband will enjoy you smiling and enjoying your lives together. Good luck and remember his love will only get stronger as time goes by.

Learn to be forgiving and get through this, there could be worse things to deal with in you lives.

Take Care, Andrea

I did not tell my DH or parents until recently (surgery scheduled for November 5). I was worried how they would react and wanted to be sure I had all the facts and hurdles crossed before telling them. Now that my family knows, they have been so very supportive and proud that I'm taking steps to improve my health and quality of life.

I have NO intention of telling my pompous boss or judgemental co-workers.

I considered keeping it a secret, but then I decided that part of this whole process is owning my problem and acknowledging that I need help for it. Also, I have a very supportive family, and I figure I need all the support I can get. I suppose if I didn't have this support system, I might be tempted to keep it to myself. Also, if I worked I'm not sure what I would do. I find myself telling anyone who will listen because I'm proud of taking that step towards a healthier me. Also, I can't keep a secret to save my life. Not even my own.

I didn't tell a few at 1st because I didn't want the negativity or gossip. Now I'm at the point to where I don't care who knows. Not to mention the vibes I get anyways when people wonder how I'm losing so quick and not putting food first in our social activities. I used to be the one who made and brought all the homemade cakes/desserts. No strawberry cheesecake, German choc cake, nor red velvet cake this yr for the holidays. They got sniffed when I signed up to bring salad and green beans!!